The sixth Black Hole. Invitees only... - Page 6

Originally posted by: Heema22

I don't think I will advise any one to be a doctor . Never encouraged my sibling either . You are in better field . Dia did good job too.. saumya is in fantastic field I was very stupid . Choose one of the worst and stressful field . Trauma is full of sorrow and challenge and on top of every thing brain most complicated organ . But destiny that all I can say . Many times I want to cry while attending my patients or talking to their families but I have to be professional even when I am pulling plugs out and waiting . I will never ever recommend my field to any one but it's very satisfying I love when I fix people . No other rewards !

I know my field is nothing compared to yours, but I too would advise people to pick some other profession and be happy 😆 You get to travel and thats the only good part. The rest of it sucks. Especially when you don't see any good come of losing sleep. Some day, when there is some balance in the bank, I'll retire and enjoy the good life. Which is, basically, doing a lot of nothing 😆

Originally posted by: Heema22

Today, a colleague and I were discussing coping with emotions. She has an angry mother and she does not know how to handle it. Her mom, apparently, gets livid for the smallest thing. I told her that she should engage her mind elsewhere, but thats easier said than done.

Mom and anger and daughters are very old equations . It's more common than we think . With that kind of anger she will not be able to channel her energy anywhere else . What she need to find out is root of mom's anger . Many times we are mirror image of our mothers and mothers with low self esteem sees that and start to blame herself for the same problem she sees in her daughter and instead of dealing with it they start to build up anger . Many times that level of frustration are very damaging . Tell your friend to start with small talks . First small casual and later big .,once she verbalized her root problems things will improve . Mother and daughter relation is one big complicated biological relationship.

I'll tell her to try talking, but from what she described, her mother seems really difficult. Unpredictable, actually. Never know what will tick her off. Seemed to me as though this girl is the most easily available punching bag.

@bold: I really did not think this was common. I thought this kind of tension is mostly between fathers and sons.

Originally posted by: AllThingsNice

I'll tell her to try talking, but from what she described, her mother seems really difficult. Unpredictable, actually. Never know what will tick her off. Seemed to me as though this girl is the most easily available punching bag.

@bold: I really did not think this was common. I thought this kind of tension is mostly between fathers and sons.

Originally posted by: Heema22

I think we see bad side in our profession and we think that it's horrible . When I talk to my husband and my siblings they have their frustrations but they have more satisfaction . Specially my husband . He just loves his job . He is excellent at it so it helps . He never ever complaints . Only thing he hates is being alone and eating out all the times . So we need to look at what's good and forget about what's bad . You and saumya might be able to do variations in your professions. But me and Dia stuck for ever !

Do you really think you will ever have enough money to relax and enjoy ? 😡 Let me dream na!!

When that time comes we should open place equivalent to " Shantiniketan " for fun loving people and be together , and have lots of fun. Yesss...agree 😃😃

Ya, I know that even in a job that one absolutely LOVES, there will be parts that are not to one's liking.

Lemme see...its not as though I hate my job, but I have problems with the management (which is where I belong too, but I dislike their style of functioning). Most of the time, my team ends up cleaning up the mess that others made and paying for sins that others committed. And they are told that it is their duty. I stand up for them and am seen as anti-management. So, these are some pain areas, but since it cannot be wished away, the best thing to do is to grin and bear it!

Originally posted by: Heema22

Mom and anger and daughters are very old equations . It's more common than we think . With that kind of anger she will not be able to channel her energy anywhere else . What she need to find out is root of mom's anger . Many times we are mirror image of our mothers and mothers with low self esteem sees that and start to blame herself for the same problem she sees in her daughter and instead of dealing with it they start to build up anger . Many times that level of frustration are very damaging . Tell your friend to start with small talks . First small casual and later big .,once she verbalized her root problems things will improve . Mother and daughter relation is one big complicated biological relationship.

I'll tell her to try talking, but from what she described, her mother seems really difficult. Unpredictable, actually. Never know what will tick her off. Seemed to me as though this girl is the most easily available punching bag.

@bold: I really did not think this was common. I thought this kind of tension is mostly between fathers and sons.

No no. This is very common .in US they are working on starting groups for mom and daughter . It's hidden . Father and sons problem is more open . Mom tends to be passive aggressive and fathers are more aggressive . It's hormonal . Both with same psychology " seeing your self in your off spring " and wanting better . Which is very understandable . But mom are very smart with relationship. They can hide better . Fathers are not good at it and they snap . Moms are unpredictable and fathers are predictable . if son doesn't do well its sons problem . If daughter doesn't do well its moms problem . If When you hear Psychologist or psychiatrist talking about this it's fascinating . It's more talked about in US because of open culture . Our culture tends to hide it . Moms suppose to love children specially daughters .

I think this one sentence will merit an essay - mothers who love their kids because they are supposed to! Maybe we should leave this for a later time too. Hot topic!

Edit: Will tell her about the log. Will share anything that she tells me too. If she gives me any examples and so on. She was looking really troubled. Young thing, barely 24. But looks much older and is constantly anxious.

Originally posted by: Heema22

Management is catch 22 problem . You never win . Every which way you turn they find issues . But speaking out helps and I am glad you do otherwise they will walk all over you and they will abuse you . My husband is in management . He tells me that he loves and encourages his staff to speak out . Many times he socially mingles with them and after one drink they start to talk and he finds out lots of issues . I must tell you I can't do what he does . But you seems to be handling it just fine to keep it up. I am very verbal at my work too. .

You can be verbal and abusive because your stress levels are completely different. So, saat khoon maaf 😆

To an extent, management, I think impedes productivity. Causes dispiritedness and motivation issues. A good manager can make a difference, but one good egg can do only so much!

Originally posted by: Heema22

My dear . You need sleep . I am still waiting . I got 4 T/C from Shama . She is anxiously waiting for me . First time in her life she is performing lawani . Baithi lawani . My Maushi who died choreographed it so it's very special . Mom would have been proud of her ,it's on hindi song " dil chees kya hey " I am very anxious to see .

So good night . See you Monday . I hate your Vrat " not to keep in touch with us over the weekend " 🤗But we still like you .

Baithi lavani choreographed by Maushi!! Energetic family you have!

Good night, Heema. See you on Monday 🤗 Thanks for still liking me 😆