Abhishek: "Aishwarya Does The Heavy-Lifting At Home" - Page 6

Originally posted by: TheDecapitated

Didn’t have to guess that. Look what she did to her career post marriage and worse after becoming a mother. She barely is doing movies, keeps rejecting everything. And does only ones where directors (like ADHM, Jazbaa, Fanney khan) can work around her mommy duties *rolls eyes*

The only one she seems to have committed fully is PS, and thats only for Mani. Its sad because you can see what she is capable of here

I feel like most women, she feels like if she becomes more successful it would cause ego issues in her husband and would make it difficult for her at home. You could sense that in interviews when they are talking about her superstardom as opposed to her husband, and she will be no he is amazing and the best.. blah blah.

ya she did bad things to her career post marriage... like put on a few years and gain some fat. Also, she shouldn't have been happy just being a wife and a mother, no? With a better career and by working her arse off the next 30 years, she could have made more money which would have allowed her to buy a bigger house and retire with financial stability to spend the rest of her old age with her husband and child, no?You got some more ideas?

There is absolutely nothing wrong with what he said. Do I wish Ash were working. YES

But its her choice to stay home. Her choice. She's not some abused woman being held down by her husband. She wants to be a full time mom. That's a strong woman

I do not think the new generation has a sense of hierarchy."

This particular line isn't about hierarchy among couple..he said it about parent child. There is a hierarchy here naturally.. isn't it?

Why should I listen to u just coz u r my mother?

Well the answer can be that she has been at the stage u r currently and has more experience and more wisdom to deal with the situation

Originally posted by: return_to_hades

I agree with you somewhat.

I do believe that feminism is about women's right to choose what they want for themselves.

If they want to be a homemaker and stay-at-home wife, it is their choice, and we should respect that.

If they want to have a successful career, balance work and family or have no kids/no family, it is their choice, and we should respect that.

The problem for me is two-fold

One is when we have double standards for men and women. Men also deserve the right to choose to be homemakers and stay-at-home husbands, and as a society, we need to be more respectful of that.

The bigger problem is when husbands like Abhishek make statements like they do. "I do not do the heavy lifting at home. That is entirely done by my wife. She allows me to go and do my work. The point is, do not try and deal with it. I do not think the new generation has a sense of hierarchy."

Even if this is what makes Ash happy, and she does it of her own volition, it reeks of entitlement. He comes off as someone who expects that from his wife and believes that it is the order of how it should be. The bold is especially grating. Men like this embolden and encourage other men to expect the same of their wives.

This is why as a feminist, I will support homemakers but not tradwives. Being a stay-at-home wife and mom because it is what you want is one thing. Stating that stay-at-home wife and mom is the natural order that all couples should adhere to is problematic. And while Ash may not say it herself, it's still a problem that Abhishek says it so frequently.

And this has happened multiple times. One or two times I would dismiss it as misspeaking. But Abhishek is not a bumbling idiot who can never say the right things. He is intentionally saying things as he believes them and feels that society should adhere to them.

The bold is what he said about parent child equation if I'm not mistaken. Not about husband wife.

"The point is, do not try and deal with it. I do not think the new generation has a sense of hierarchy. That was something we were brought up with. They are inquisitive... they are like 'Why? Why should I just listen to you because you are my mother?' They are far more informed, they are born into this era of information and technology. (So my advice is just) answer their questions."

He didn't misspeak. He's talking about Aish's involvement vs. his own philosophy re: children.

I'm not even a fan of the dude but am finding myself confused re: what the heck is so offensive in what he said?

Sounds like Aish keeps a short leash, and he doesn't quite agree.

Originally posted by: JodhaBai

There is absolutely nothing wrong with what he said. Do I wish Ash were working. YES

But its her choice to stay home. Her choice. She's not some abused woman being held down by her husband. She wants to be a full time mom. That's a strong woman

Both who choose to work and choose not to work are strong women.

Abhishek is just jealous that he does not have even a fraction of the stardom that his wife (or his father) has.

Maybe Aishwarya is doing the heavy lifting in parenting, because this is yet another thing that Abhishek would mess up and not be able to do justice to

This forum always tries to project Aish as the illiterate gopi bahu who’s forced to be a housewife, Jaya VB the grumpy Kokila and Abhi B as the mute Ahem ji .. Why o lord why? Aish married in here with her full functioning brain at the age of 33 and being completely aware of what she’s marrying into, still it’s Aish who’s the victim?

isn’t there a possibility that she was never ambitious enough and wanted to sit at home instead of working after marriage? What is with this constant whining over ohh poor Aish being tortured by evil Bacchans

Originally posted by: HearMeRoar

The bold is what he said about parent child equation if I'm not mistaken. Not about husband wife.

"The point is, do not try and deal with it. I do not think the new generation has a sense of hierarchy. That was something we were brought up with. They are inquisitive... they are like 'Why? Why should I just listen to you because you are my mother?' They are far more informed, they are born into this era of information and technology. (So my advice is just) answer their questions."

He didn't misspeak. He's talking about Aish's involvement vs. his own philosophy re: children.

Fair enough. It's still iffy and reflects a very old-school mindset.

I don't think Ash is an oppressed wife. She is a capable person who makes her own choices.

But both Big B and Little B rub me the wrong way with things they say. It's always sugar-coated patriarchy with them.