Who was responsible for Kabir-Natasha's failed relationship in ZNMD?

In the movie we saw Kabir (Abhay Deol) and Natasha (Kalki Koechlin) as a couple who were about to get married but didn't in the end.

Quite a bummer ending for a Bollywood movie in the slice-of-life genre. But that's also what made it realistic. The movie showed that not all couples could sort out their differences and have a "happily ever after", if there's a thing like that.

Natasha was a girl who had high hopes and dreams regarding love and marriage, which were inspired by Bollywood and patriarchy.

She was ready to leave her job after marriage like most Indian women are expected to do. She had Kabir and having a family as her first priority in her life. This also made her possessive towards Kabir.

Kabir was more easy going and had more realistic notions regarding love. He didn't want Natasha to leave her job, to be such a possessive girlfriend. He didn't want Natasha to have her life revolving around him because he didn't want his life to be revolving around her.

He didn't want to give everything to keep this relationship like she was. He wasn't ready to commit to this relationship like she was and that was probably the final nail in the coffin of their relationship.

In the song "Suraj ki baahon mein", which is played during the end credits where Arjun and Laila's wedding is shown, Natasha is shown married/dating another man while still being in good terms with Kabir.

This means when Kabir called off their wedding and asked for more time, either Natasha dumped him or they mutually broke up, or maybe did date for some more time to finally agree that they're better without each other and broke up.

So who was more responsible for this relationship not ending up in marriage? Was Natasha unrealistic in her hopes regarding love and marriage? Or was Kabir being a commitment phobic?

Was Kabir's idea of not sacrificing anything for his relationship a good one if he wants to end up with someone?

Neither was to blame. They didn't fit. They didn't have the same life goals. If they'd known each other better before their accidental push to an engagement they never would have gotten engaged at all. Careers, life goals, kids etc are things to discuss before one gets engaged.

He didn't want a wife who's entire life revolved around him and who also didn't trust him. He liked the Natasha that had other life goals and interests aside from marriage. Natasha wasn't sacrificing anything, she was doing what she wanted - without any discussion.

How would Natasha have felt if he said he was quitting his job to plan a wedding and his only future goal was to be married. His family was wealthy enough. My guess is she would have run for the hills. 😆

Originally posted by: Talis

Neither was to blame. They didn't fit. They didn't have the same life goals. If they'd known each other better before their accidental push to an engagement they never would have gotten engaged at all. Careers, life goals, kids etc are things to discuss before one gets engaged.

He didn't want a wife who's entire life revolved around him and who also didn't trust him. He liked the Natasha that had other life goals and interests aside from marriage. Natasha wasn't sacrificing anything, she was doing what she wanted - without any discussion.

How would Natasha have felt if he said he was quitting his job to plan a wedding and his only future goal was to be married. His family was wealthy enough. My guess is she would have run for the hills. 😆

That's why I said she had patriarchal views.

I loved your views regarding the relationship of Kabir Natasha. And somewhere I feel they were right people in a wrong relationship. Both had different views about where/how their relationship should go.

She wanted to completely invest herself into her partner which someone else would absolutely love. But Kabir had fallen in love with Natasha only because she had her own life, was independent and never relied on anyone.

Suddenly seeing this change in his lover made him fearful of what is stored in future for them. That's amazing that he realised he should call off the wedding earlier than standing at the altar.

That film was over rated hot garbage

The only good part was when Katrina see Hrithiks pink phone 😆

As Kabir confessed in front of his friends, Natasha wasn't the same person anymore, the Natasha whom he knew was career oriented, easy going, chill and all. But she changed and has become very unfamiliar to him. So, basically Natasha's changed behaviour is responsible. Kabir wanted her to focus on her career and not let her life revolve around him. Natasha not only made her life around him and his family but also expected (read demanded) him to do the same. When a man is expecting you to focus on your career instead of him or his family is a gem according to me😆

They maybe at good terms but I think she was still holding grudges against him.

https://youtu.be/Isb7WV4d17I

Look at 3.08😆

No one .. there were just different wanted different things from life.

Natasha was an overbearing control freak whose 'love' can end up being toxic. The way she reacted about the guys' trip shows how entitled and full of herself she was. Being ready to give up her job doesn't mean much in such a situation. And the way she reacted seeing Katrina and Abhay together.

As for Kabir he was a wuss and it took him forever to speak up and admit he wasn't really in love with her. At least not deeply enough to commit to marriage. He was giving the relationship a shot when the confusion over the ring arose and he was scared of a confrontation so he played along.

It was bound to fail anyway but Natasha's attitude certainly didn't help

Originally posted by: Muskie

As Kabir confessed in front of his friends, Natasha wasn't the same person anymore, the Natasha whom he knew was career oriented, easy going, chill and all. But she changed and has become very unfamiliar to him. So, basically Natasha's changed behaviour is responsible. Kabir wanted her to focus on her career and not let her life revolve around him. Natasha not only made her life around him and his family but also expected (read demanded) him to do the same. When a man is expecting you to focus on your career instead of him or his family is a gem according to me😆

They maybe at good terms but I think she was still holding grudges against him.

https://youtu.be/Isb7WV4d17I

Look at 3.08😆

Natasha was controlling, insecure, distrustful, possessive and spoilt sport. She misinterpreted the ring as engagment ring but Kabir was coward and idiot not to clarify. He took too long to clear the mess created.