HOW I BECAME A BIG FAN OF GULLU BABA - PART 2
"Pooja. I need your help. I am worried .." Sheela squeezed my hand and dragged me to nearest Mcdonals. I had heard about Sheela's recent breakup with Mahesh. (Check first part on page 1) He was a hottie and I was rather pleased with the news.
I am not a gossip monger but hey I am a human. I do talk for hours on Agelina vs Jennifer or Kate vs Pippa. So I was curious to know all the juicy details between Sheela and Mahesh. I took a deep breath and put on a very serious face and slowly prodded her in right direction with innocuous looking question.. "How are you doing ?"
Sheela had black circles under her eyes. (I recommend Neutrogena products for black circles.) "I am worried about Gulu. He is not getting any exposure."
I dont follow BB that closely. I am very emotional and last time I broke up with my boyfriend because he preferred Tanisha to Gauhar. So Sheela was not interested in sharing any spicy details ? I never get what I want. Tragedy of my life. 😭
My face fell. and what the hell she meant by no exposure to her Gullu or whatever ? He wears practically nothing. Any bit more exposure and the show would be A rated.
"Oh no Pooja. By exposure, I meant screen presence. He is not getting any."
I looked at Sheela curiously. Mahesh , the hottie had already cut her presence in his life to BIG ZERO and here she was worried about Gullu.
"Nowadays episodes are all about Tanna and Upen. I hate her. She is so selfish , does not value human life... " Sheela rambled.
Being a woman, I sympathised with Tanna's need for makeup. I lost couple of boyfriends because they came to know how I look without makeup... drumroll... brace youself!! I even lost one JUST BEFORE getting my Valentine present. I usually start shopping for a new BF only after valentine so needless to say I was not prepared.
So I could perfectly understand the gravity of her situation. How could she allow millions of viewers to see her pimples on National TV ? So she hooked up with that hottie Upen ? Is he loaded ? He talks about world tours. Is he part of Cirqu De Soleil ? He well can be with that kinda hot body and still do world tours.
I did not listen to next few sentences of Sheela but realised she was hoping to convert me to be a Gullu fan. I would have refused the offer but I owed her 75$. Infact I wanted to touch her for few more bucks. Sheela could be induced to forget all money if I played my cards right.
Sheela showed me few avis of Gullu wearing Mirchi. He was looking at camera and crying uncontrollably. It was funny that this 90kg hulk reduced to this state by a lanky, anemic Tanna. Natasha was sitting in next chair with cakes of mirchi on her face.
"Why is Natash not crying ?" I asked.
"Oh language problem. She does not know Hindi that well so she could not cry." I was glad that Sheela had not opted for Logic course.
Mind you. I dont like sissy, cry babies. I love bad boyz spanking me hard, mercilessly. Oh it turns me on. My last bf was of mushy mushy variety with a whiny voice but he was loaded alright. I somehow managed to get him buy me expensive valentine gift 5 months in advance and then dumped him quicker than Gullu getting rid of Diandra after the party feedback.
He cried so much that Hudson river water-level rose by a centimeter. He now has more beautiful girlfriend and was flaunting her to me. He is such an a** h**e.😡
Again I digress. Sheela had already moved on to Diandra topic and how she harmed his image. I admire Diandra. The girl has guts and knows how to take control. I am weak in comparison love to be a pampering princess with all unwavering attention in the world. I had watched bathroom episode multiple times and then shopped for adult DVDs with similar roleplay but found none.😳😭
I let my imagination run amuck about closed bathroom and discussed with my bf and all of sudden, he started avoiding me. He is such a douche **%%^^$$$$. Urrrggghhh. 😡We girls are such poor weaklings.. Our dreams never realised in this male dominated society.😭
"Are you aware, he featured in ORAMAX ?"
"ORAMAX ?? Whats that ? Some oral for max pleasure ?"
"You dunno ORAMAX ??? Unbelievable."
"No what is it ? I think I need to borrow Tanna's GK book too."
"Well Gullu has featured in ORAMAX."
"But what is ORAMAX ?"
"Hmmm. I think it must be something very prestigious if Gullu features in it. Love him hate him but you cant ignore him."
"Well Gullu keeps poking Tanna and has very poor sense of humour."
"He has reached 100K twitters. Love him hate him but cant ignore him. He does everything chaude mein."
and Sheela demonstrated "chaude mein" with action... errr how should I put it.. With shoulders back and By forcing her upper body part forward in my direction. I was sitting quite close to her and her upper body part almost touching me. It gave me a jolt and I spilt my coffe. I looked around. Few customers were looking curiously at us. One lady winked in support and gave us thumbs up. Another elderly looked at us with open contempt. Damn so embarassing. 😳 Even more embarassing than Gullu being invited to inaugurate public toilets.
"Check this graph on my iphone. I puchased this new app from Appstore. It keeps track and plots Gullu's popularity daily. See this upward rising curve. Last time the curve was so steep, it shot right through the phone and almost reached the sky.It shattered the glass and phone case. I had to buy another phone.
And how about threatening Tanna with a knife ?"
"Love him hate him... It was cute. Dont be ridiculous. You think anyone will feel threatened by holding knife like this?" Sheela was getting too excited and held McDonald's paper knife in her hand. It was almost touching my neck. McDonald manager saw the scene and got concerned and came running hurriedly to check on us. He politely asked us to leave the place.
Anyway. To cut a long story short. I am now a convert. I am a big fan of Gullu baba. He is the only one who made money for me as Sheela has agreed to forget about the money I owed her.
Gullu Baba ki jai ho!! 👏
And remember ... Love him hate him but you cant ignore him because this national hero, the most popular, the funniest, the sexiest, fully clothed, non interfering, universal teacher, the charming prince does everything in CHAUDE MEIN.
Edited by Pooja-- - 10 years ago
