Lost to Anandi....

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 10 years ago

#81

Originally posted by: purvim
gouri ho ya ganga dono ko aanandi se itni jalan kyun hai? 😕

This is because they both know that Anandi has set a benchmark which BH people appreciate. So in order to win their hearts, they first try to replicate Anandi, and in the interim lose out their own identity. The pretence becomes suffocating and the lost identity is hard to bring back, eventually leading to insecurities and dis-satisfaction.

Even Saanchi was on the same path - used pretence to win hearts of BH people, but she was unveiled before the marriage could happen.

Edited by Missesha - 10 years ago

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

#82

Originally posted by: Missesha
What was it that Ganga lost to Anandi? The challenge that which mother will reveal what to her child? Was it a challenge btw? I thought Ganga was just inferring that no parent should involve in other parent / child's matter, by using that as an example.
So when did this become a challenge that was to be lost or won?

Or is it something else that Ganga lost.

Come to think of it, Ganga has everything in bigger and better amounts than what Anandi has right now.

Ganga lives in her own sasural (home) with respect and dignity while Anandi has lost her sasural walas (her home) and was almost living like a refugee.

Ganga had the opportunity to raise both her kids in front of her eyes, and give them a secured future. Anandi has 3 kids but one is back to his bio parents, one lived like a refugee and the other one is subject to brutal torture always.

Ganga has the love, trust and support of her husband, Anandi doesn't even have her husband anymore.

Ganga is almost the woman of the house, Anandi has lost everything that can give her rights to be the woman of any house.

Ganga was suffocated with A's presence and finally A is out of picture (which I personally believe was the right thing to happen to both A and G and J too)

Despite all this, does Anandi still have anything over and above Ganga, that Ganga is afraid of losing to Anandi?

I am reminded of the dialogue in Deewar.

Mere paas gadi hai, bangla hai. Tere paas kya hai?

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 10 years ago

#83

Originally posted by: Stephi
So what if Ganga used to like those comparisons? How old was she at that time ? How was she treated at Ratan's ? Like a human being or worthless creature who do not even deserve to live ? So what if she used to blush ? For the first time someone started to recognize her as a person who is worthy of praise. Of course she was happy. But Since then, how much she herself has achieved in her life? Why she cannot run the race of life at her own pace without comparison with Anandi ? What is it that Anandi has made more and better than Ganga? A cup of tea?

It seems only Ganga has no right to her own personality, to be unique, to be memorable, to be proud. She has to be compared with Anandi, she has to enjoy in it , she has to blush, otherwise she never been genuine . Really ?

Those who like to be constantly compared with other persons be the first to raise their hands.

@ bold... yes Ganga achieved most of these things on her own merit, so why is she so baffled with comparisons with A.

If not to DS, she can at least tell Jagya that she constantly doesn't like to benchmarked against Anandi. She could sometimes make him count what she was and how far she has reached. She could tell him, that if Jagya could accept her for who she is rather than trying to make her reach the height that Anandi has reached then it would be great.

Why didn't shet?

Just silent resentment and finally a burst-out

And now Anandi is out of BH, so why this zeal of competing against her? And most importantly what does Ganga want to gain over Anandi?

Edited by Missesha - 10 years ago

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 10 years ago

#84

Originally posted by: leavesandwaves

I am reminded of the dialogue in Deewar.

Mere paas gadi hai, bangla hai. Tere paas kya hai?

lol... yes and Anandi might say ' mere paas dadisa hai'

Gang will be like 😵

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

#85

Ganga wants Jagya to completely banish anandi from his life, from his thoughts just like she is trying to do. And she knows that it is impossible.

She knows how anandi is idolised and now she feels she will not be idolized like that even if she achieves more.

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Missesha

@Missesha

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 10 years ago

#86

Originally posted by: leavesandwaves
Ganga wants Jagya to completely banish anandi from his life, from his thoughts just like she is trying to do. And she knows that it is impossible.

She knows how anandi is idolised and now she feels she will not be idolized like that even if she achieves more.

This is what Gauri tried to do and failed miserably. However, Gauri gets some brownie points because Gauri was mis-led by Jagya in those days saying that Anandi is good-for-nothing and that's why he is dumping her.

That was not the case with Ganga. She knew a lot of dark secrets of J's life and Anandi's importance before their marriage. She was also ok with Ja-An cordial relationship and looked up to Anandi in many ways. Finally when Ganga started to carve her own identity and making a place for herself in BH, Anandi was brought back in her life to live in the same roof as hers. This led to unavoidable and unwanted comparisons, Jagya's divided attention and an unsaid desire to remain J's and BH's number 1 prority.

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

#87

I can understand the suffocation that Ganga faced due to A's presence, but now A is out of their house (and minds too), so shouldn't Ganga be focusing on re-building everything that she thought she was losing due to A's presence?

When she was trying to do so, mannu ratan problem cropped up and Mannu ended in SN. It is like pouring petrol over blazing fire.

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 10 years ago

#88

If Ganga wants Jagya to completely banish Anandi from his life that's perfectly fine and she should focus her energies in that direction but why find Anandi at fault for this?

She was not asking for a place in Jagya's life or even at his home so why nt take this up with Jagya instead of taking out her frustartions on Anandi?

Did Anandi ask Singhs to idolise her?

Does the fault lie with Singhs or with Anandi?

Anandi never wanted to be part of Singhs life nor did she want them to be part of her life but her guilt over her daughter's disappearance and her insecurities over her abilities as a mother forced her to accept the decision made by the two people who mattered to her most after Shiv.

Ganga knew that Anandi didn't want to be at BH so why resentment against Anandi? They never wanted the same things.

Gauri did the same thing but at least at that tine Anandi was very much part of J's life as his legitimate wife

Ganga has absolutely no reason to feel that way about Anandi.

She is following the same logic with Mannu and Pooja too. Why not be strict with Mannu instead of barging in on Pooja and her mother?

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

#89

It is complicated stuff but I will try to explain.

There is a saying in telugu, Atta meeda kopam dutta meeda choopinchinatlu.

Anger against someone is shown on someone else.

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 10 years ago

#90

Originally posted by: leavesandwaves
It is complicated stuff but I will try to explain.

There is a saying in telugu, Atta meeda kopam dutta meeda choopinchinatlu.

Anger against someone is shown on someone else.

It's taking the path of least resistance. Another bad way of handling problems in life

Instead of going to the root of the problem trying to tackle the superficial part of it.

All thanks to this approach the problem still persists