Jagya and Gauri reminds my husband's infidelity - Page 6

Originally posted by: Dr3viL

Yeah agree with the last two.. From another perspective though as a guy the girl does tend to put pressure on you to let go..but whatever I have to offer my potential partner is because of my parents .. So as soon as I get a feeling that she is one of those types then I am out. my parents don't expect us to live or work for them or with them .. But girls these days want you - and nothing else. I am a fairly rational guy and know I can give each party their due rights .. But as soon as that parent or sibling rivalry comes .. Then I am out. Like a light.

Sry 2 say but dis all story cmz 2 be lyk a flop indian serial.u want attention n u got it baby..so plz stop playing wid otherz feelingz.

Maybe I'd be called insensitive to say this--but I think its ok and natural for a lot of people to love their partner more than anyone else...anyone else!!...

I agree parents are the one who have given us life...when you marry a person that person has practically done nothing for you...but love doesn't exactly work as a business deal, I mean to some extent it does and should..but it cannot be entirely on that basis(or else why would anyone love their children who do nothing for parents)...you don't give love exactly in the proportion of what the other has done for you---you also reason out and rationalize your life's current situations...obligations...needs and priorities, and irrational feelings too !! And no matter what---nobody is there in your life in your current situation as much as your life partner is to you. When you'll be old and sick ...only your life partner will care...and be there.

No matter what people say..the hard fact is---I have seen adult, family people mourn their old parents death for some time, and move on...those same people get completely devastated, and shattered if their life partner dies. Its hard to deny the importance of your life partner in adult life.

My old grandfather died few months back...he had forgotten half of his children, but recalled some, he mentioned his parents once maybe...but the one he remembered most till his last breath was my late grandmother. All the time the one he wished he could be with most...was my late grandmother. They were no Romeo and Juliet...they were simple husband and wife who like a lot of married couples took each other for granted, were rude, and selfish to each other so many times...but at the heart of hearts they loved no one like they loved each other...which probably even they were not aware of ..when both of them were living.

I am only trying to say...its only natural for some people to love their partners more than anyone else, even while they take each other for granted...and I really don't think its unnatural or weird.

I completely agree that nobody can take your parents place, no way one should lessen this gratitude, love and blessing ...but if you have a lasting life partner...no body can take his/her place too. Ultimately you life partner is the one with whom you have shared everything for the maximum amount of time...shared joys and sorrows, and been there for each other...and its a big thing. Its a mature relation in which you have received a lot...and given a lot.

I understand rationally people can give a lot of reasons why they should love their parents more thn their prtners...but life comes in a system where a set of reasons cannot completely explain everything that happens...why do people love their lifetime-spouses so much (or why do they love their little children who don't /can't d anything for parents...) is way beyond plain reasoning.

Yes marriages fail...partners stop loving each other--and your parents never stop loving you no matter what. But that's where the beauty of life lies...people need to work hard to keep the relation and feelings in the closest relation they have. Best things are not free or easy. they require constant effort.

I, in no way...am talking about undermining the sacrifices one's parents make...I know a lady who never married because she wanted to devote her life to taking care of her parents without losing focus or priority..I respect her a lot. Parents have to be loved and respected always...all their sacrifices have to be understood and honored...but I still think loving your life partner more than anyone else is not wrong...if you marry and if your marriage lasts.

Hahaha... cool story go on girl...

Originally posted by: hooked

Wow ! You are able to see that ? I thought only girls cud see that about others and that too after it was too late to do anything about it.

Often times, the guys usually seem so driven by their wives logic that they don't even bother to think how suddenly their loving parents start doing/saying very insensitive and inconsiderate things. As a sister I hv seen my own brother become a stranger over time and misunderstand so many things he wud never have before.

Am so glad you see thru these grabby kinds - stay away from them - far far away 😊

asru if u go back and read the reply was related to what hooked said. this comparison business is something ur talking about elsewhere..not me.

Originally posted by: Dr3viL

Hi hooked.. most guys can see this as well, but like girls find it difficult to leave, some cases you have no choice but to stay otherwise you wont see your kids. Im not a player but when I do see girls its with decent intentions and most of the time i was engaged to this girl.. who was super sweet to my family.. beyond normal sweet. she blew her top in regards to my fam, and i left. she didnt say rational things at the time ..she was more upset with her own family, but still i left because i would never diss her family even though they were fu(ked. Granted your wife is entittled to your love, and everything else and however difficult it is you have to remind yourself that in life you have many relationships that need nurturing.

@hima

Hima i agree with what you say, all that is true when you are head over heels in love, you do forget everyone and want to spend every moment with that person. However it true that when all hell breaks loose.. its your family that is there to help you put you back together. So how can one forget their family? also a husband and wife have children generally.. if you forget your parents then your kids wont learn much and you will suffer.. Youth and ability is a temporary stage.. at one stage or another we become dependant.. its the circle of life.

Its also a challange to balance relations the easy way out is to take one person and run.. but life is more meaningful when you have everyone around who enjoys the sucess of your relationship.

I wouldnt want a girl who cut off her family to be with me.. if she can do that to her parents.. then im afraid that i might just be a want rather then a need. secondly..if a guy can leave his mother the frst woman in his life for you.. then whose to say another woman cant come along and do the same?

Originally posted by: hooked

I so hear you. It is hell for people who have kids and can't stay together anymore. Everyone wants to be there for their family and sometimes this alone becomes a blackmail - if u want access to the kids - agree to all my conditions OR ELSE ...

Parents are precious and kids interaction with grandparents is even more precious. U said that perfectly - kids watch how we treat our own folks and care for their happiness, health, finances, comfort, whatever. the more people meet, the more they will know about family stories and tricks and fun times and the deeper bonds we are able to forge.

My point was - spouses have their own special place - but parents usually stay away and don't have as much time and energy as we do. We only take from them till we move out of the house and into our careers and our own lives. We have to find time to be with them and care for them as they will not be around for as long and we're going to be deprived of this pure unending love and support.

A loving and caring spouse will understand this bond and will also love his/her parents equally and not feel jealous or short-changed because of it.

Seemaji waiting for your continuation. Long time no see. Is your story over