Post is incomplete. Will complete later ;)
Look, it is not about affairs or relationships falling apart being a usual thing. It's about wrong-doing.
He should not be punished only for the reason that he left Anandi. It is because he broke the law, twisted it, he and Gauri were callous not just to Anandi but even to the law of the land.
It's a case of taking everyone - from people to law for granted! It would have served as a lesson to the society and many girls in that village like Anandi, would have come to know about such provisions.
Punishment is never revenge! Like I asked earlier, when a teacher punishes a mischievous child or a school rusticates a kid who's always flouting rules and committing blunders - are they taking revenge from the student?! Or are they ensuring that the errant individual realises that he can't take administration, rules and other people for granted and wouldn't get away scott-free?! When someone punishes someone else, is he only correcting that individual and making that individual pay a price for his mistakes or is he also setting an example for society/family and laying down basic code of conduct?!
Anandi could have taken him to court and later refused to accept him in her life, but seen to it that he is punished for making a mockery of social and legal system and making Gauri type girls realise that they can't simply trample on someone else's life like this!
First of all, personally I don't believe that two people need to stay in marriage forever just for sake of social obligation.
"Love" might not stay forever , but at least there should be at least one of the factors like mutual respect, friendship, trust, companionship for the relationship to sustain.
But if a man is staying with his wife just because he fears that his wife might put him to jail for leaving her or if he is staying with his wife thinking her to be a "bechari" then it's better the man leaves the woman. A woman can live her own life without any help if given a chance.
Definitely any break - up need to be done in a proper legal manner and if a woman is not financially stable condition as she spent her whole life for her family, alimony needs to be given so that she can get some time to establish herself in some way.
As far JA case is concerned, he did not proceed per laws. He did not seek divorce from A; he insulted A. all the time during 5 years etc etc - so on these grounds Anandi can take J to jail.
But apart from sending out message to the world, Anandi, like any normal human being, is thinking about her own personal equation with J.
Dragging J to court will not teach thick-skinned J a lesson. I am not talking about masses or message to society. I am talking only about only J and A.
For a person as thick-skinned as J, it would have meant a revenge from Anandi to split him with G. He would not have repented on his decision for marrying Guari or for taking A for granted. Instead, he would only think that A. is a jealous rat who has set on her revenge mission.
A is not dragging J to court because does not want to send any message to J that she is trying to split him with G. She is doing it for her self respect and does not want to prove herself as a jealous, vengeful wife. J has already accused A of taking away his family from him and she is not ready to hear that she is splitting JG.
Begging is nothing like punishing to Jagya. He's used to asking other people for money and other stuff. Even when he wanted to become doctor, he asked Anandi to convince the family. He takes Anandi for granted and has no qualms asking her for anything in life. He's also living in his bubble with Gauri on the confidence that Anandi could never do anything against him! What punishment is this?!
J was not ready to beg before A initially. It was DS who told him to be a man and take G's responsibility. So to be a man before G, J decided to go to A for help. Even when Bhairon ordered that J will get money from A, he was not happy. So bowing down before A is not something J enjoys.
He already left his family, so how does it make a difference to him? He was anyway rather ashamed of village and family after getting a taste of modern life.
He has left his family but he never thought that his family would desert him too !
Even few episodes before, J was shown to be hopeful that everyone will forgive him. So acceptance of family is important for him and since all his mistakes have been forgiven in past, he is hoping that this time too, it would be forgiven. So in near future, his family's alienation would be a punishment for him .
I hate it how she is not even taking a divorce from him! What does she want to be known as? Jagya's abandoned legal wife?! Why hasn't she truly and totally set herself free from him?!
I would have loved it too !!
Legally disowning is not just about property it also entails legally withdrawing the family name & connection from the person and declaring that from now on you or your family has no contact or relation whatsoever with the disowned person. Jagya's family has NOT done that to him!
That is something that many people do with their family members. That's what is actually called cutting off a person from life or family.
Yes - if Singh family is so disgusted with their son, they should do it. Even I did not understood why Bhairon got ready to help J. He first of all, wanted J to bow down before A and also was influenced by her lecture that their family prestige would be at stake if J takes them to court for property.
I know Jagya's coming back to family depends on A. It's nothing different! Jagya has forever been shown dependent on A!! He doesn't mind being dependent on her as long as it serves his OWN interests! And if A can ensure he doesn't get punished and Bapu sa doesn't cut off his funding or financial backing, then later as dust settles over this issue, she could even persuade them to get the boy back in family!! The CVs have left all options open for redeeming Jagya or justifying all his actions after all!
I don't know how CVs can redeem J after so many things. As far
And Jagya was never really shamed in front of villagers! The whole village was not present there. It's not like the Panchayat held a case against him or the whole village stoned him or ridiculed him and his new girl, lynching them out of the village!
Only a few villagers had come to DS' house, that too due to intrigue over the new girl and they left quietly without taking any action or saying a word against J or Singh family. Only a handful of villagers were present when Phooli was barking at him on the road. He was NEVER shamed in front of the village or had to face ignominy from the WHOLE village!
These things are minor hiccups or temporary setbacks for a seasoned thick-skinned, egotistic, shameless man like him!🤢
Wrong-doing is wrong-doing. Saying that a person doesn't need to be punished at all for minor or natural or routine things like breaking the law, assuming a child marriage as illegal and ditching his wife or having an affair is strange! If that is the case, then why even have laws against bribes (bribing is actually illegal in India) or corruption (stuff like illegally amassing wealth etc.)?? Why is even cheating in exams or stealing question papers enough to initiate legal proceedings against the offender?
Even universities should not be dragged to court if they ''twist'' their admission rules to favour certain candidates?
Do you mean to say that only ''really'' serious offences that cause great harm to others (physically) ought to be punished??
Should psychological harm as in case of women cheated or left in the lurch like Anandi be ignored? Is it only physical harm like rape or domestic violence which should call for punishment of perpetrator?!
I said only in case of break-up of relationships where one partner ditches another, emphasis should be given to move on in life rather than focusing in legal battles.
Relationships can't be made by laws and social system. People do fall out of love; relationships do come with expiry date; people change and hence the equation between two partners also change with time as it happened in case of JA; relationships can't be seen from the prism of law only.
If we take JA case for example. J and A both were socially conditioned to believe that they are husband and wife. While they grow up, they did not know what actually they want in life; they did not question why such a major decision was made at a time when they did not even know what is the meaning of marriage.
Anandi suppressed her own wishes and dreams to follow the social norm. J with time understood what he wants and Anandi does not fit his bill. Though J did not follow the social norm and while breaking away from it, he could not do it in proper manner.
Had J walked out of marriage for the same reasons (Anandi being not modern, their views of life not matching ) but doing it in proper manner like seeking divorce from A before getting married, treating her with respect - then there would have been hardly any criticism of J today.
If leaving a partner is wrong-doing, then what about the heart breaks that happen before marriage? What about being ditched after being in a relationship for 10 years? Which law is there to bring justice to the "offender" and to the "victim?"
Nowadays, there are certain laws for couples who are in live-in relationship. But what if a couple has never lived together and suddenly one of them call it quits or is found cheating? What would everyone say to the hapless man/woman who is left by the other person?
Everyone asks to forget the past and to move on.
The day one partner (be it in a relationship or in marriage) call it quits, the other partner should focus on his/her well being first. One should move in life and if in the process, need to punish the offender for feeling good then do it. But only if it can help them in channeling their life in better manner, they should pursue it - not for just teaching a lesson because, no law can really made anyone understand what emotional turmoil they have created in other's life.
If someone has support of family - parents or in-laws then they need not go to court?!! Wow!
Then even if an adult woman has been left and her man got married to another woman without divorcing her, then she should also not go to court, provided that in-laws are supporting her!
Why only infidelity? Even domestic violence can be ignored then, if in-laws are there for you to fondle you and tend to your wounds!
Physical abuse is different ball game. No one - be it husband wife or even our teachers can hit us. Domestic violence can endanger a life and most importantly, it causes mental trai
You're talking about Gehna. So does it mean that be-mel vivah, marital rape, literally ''buying'' a bride and wife-beating can all be justified if the man gets caring and loving towards the girl and even tries to find a new groom for her (but never actually leaves her!)?!
It's not about justification, it's about reformation. If Basant has realized his mistakes and have done his duties as husband, so what's wrong in accepting him as husband? At least, Gehna did not accept Basant in her life just for sake of "holy marriage" or social obligation.
She accepted when Basant did his duties as husband - it was a relationship that bloomed based on respect and understanding of each other and not for chanting some sanskrit slokas
Btw, when Basant found another groom for Gehna, he never knew that Gehna really loves him - he thought Gehna has left the house for DS and also she could never accept him as her husband.
A woman should forget all misery and injustice if the man decides to be goody-goody towards her? Does society give such luxury to women? No! But women should always make way for men - either move out quietly from their lives or relent and accept them wholeheartedly if they change! In either case, ultimately women take actions that are conducive to self-interests of men!
Society till was not giving such luxury but now things are changing. Now, women do stray and husbands also take back their wives if they return. Of course, these are few in numbers, but society is changing.
That is the problem I have with BV! They have basically kept all options open for their heroes like Jagya and Basant! Even Sugna temporarily faced family rejection and ostracism, but ultimately got a better man! Did she really have to pay the price that erring women like her have to, in real life?! She got pregnant before her gauna, an illegitimate kid actually, she also kept ignoring Shyam and kept thinking of Pratap and his nishaani even after being married to him. Shyam kept giving chances to her till she adjusted with him much later!! I wonder why they always have to keep Singh family in the picture and redeem all persons in that family!😡
Then what is the issue then? People like Shyams or Anandis can keep giving chances, people like Gehnas can relent. Jagyas and Basants can have their own way! Jagya gets to be free and do his OWN thing irrespective of breaking the law and mocking every system. Basant gets to keep the girl and change his attitude! Men can get to have their own way, whether they choose to change their attitude or not!
Koi mudda toh hai hi nahin. Child marriage can work also - as in Lal Singh's happy family. Any boy can get away and girl need not punish him. In fact, if in-laws don't actually support the girl, they can even feign support for the girl temporarily to ensure that she doesn't harm their son!
Exactly my point - No one
Jagya's ''suffering'' is temporary. Very minor and almost nothing compared to Anandi's 5 years of suffering and the difficulties which she'll have to endure while rebuilding her life. Much of her youth was practically wasted!! She faced humiliation and extreme mental trauma. Getting slaps or scoldings from Ma-Bapu or Tausa or being ignored by family are routine stuff for him. Like he says, he can brush off such reactions as ''natural and expected''! [And he did brush it off as natural and broke down only when DS ignored him. He still plays victim and doesn't think he's actually a perpetrator and offender!]
Anandi will not face no
It's high time he and guys like him also got to know what are the ''natural reactions'' when a person makes a mockery of the law of the land!😡
Otherwise, like I said earlier, they will eventually bring back J-G in house. Anandi will either leave the house or tie rakhi to J and put G on a pedestal as her Bhabhi sa! Everyone gets to have their own way - Anandi gets educated or maybe gets a new man, J-G get to do their own thing, Singh family gets back their son and get to keep connection with A in the name of calling her their daughter. Aal izz well!! 🤢
Child marriage, infidelity and any blunder can be dealt with or brushed aside by supporting or having your family support the victim and eventually everyone getting the right to do whatever they like to do! Evils of child marriage can be addressed by simply financing the girl's education and calling her beti or getting her remarried. Sab set ho jayega! Otherwise child marriage is justified until things go awry. Law ka beech mein kya kaam? What's the point of making it even illegal?!
What's the point of having laws over everything? Why even have police stations or jails? What's the need of judiciary when people can be clever enough to handle the victim carefully and get to do their own thing?! Punishment is revenge na! People who've been victimised only need to rebuild their own lives and move on and spread awareness to protect and educate people! No action is needed against the offenders - especially if they've suffered minor hiccups and resistance in dealing with family or some neighbours due to what wrong they did!
Anyway, there is no point of discussing all this. The serial makers have always glorified Singh family and till date, no member of Singh family had to pay for his sins or had his life ruined. Everyone from society to Anandi or Shyam or Gehna kept giving chances to them or ignoring their blunders. A Mahavir Singh's WHOLE life was ruined, but a Kalyani or her sons are doing great save for minor hiccups! Even Shyam's family, was made to accept a girl like Sugna and swallow their pride, risking public insult and shame, suppressing all dreams they had for their only son. Today, even a girl like Gauri is giving them chance, instead of ditching a slimy guy from a slimy family!! [If I were her, I'd have rejected Jagya at once upon knowing that he's from the same family that bought me and rejected me without bothering about my fate (of course his lies and irresponsible behaviour too I would have not tolerated!)].
The serial should be called Singh Parivaar ki kahani, the way it's always been going!😡
People like Anandi, Shyam's family (not Shyam), Mahavir Singh, Anandi's parents, Gehna and her family have had to pay all their life or make compromises for their whole lives, unlike the Singhs who face temporary setbacks (as if like a routine for them!) but eventually get to have their own way or get a better deal (like better husband or a more nubile wife), because every character gives chances to them and makes compromises to SERVE THEIR INTERESTS!!😡
Edited by doyelpakhi - 14 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Indian Mythology
Chakravarti Samrat Prithviraj Chauhan
