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divmath

@divmath

Voyager

Posted: 14 years ago

#31

@fuzzyface - agree completely !!

@avyarima - good points, however as I said my way of looking at things is different,...so lets just stick to our individual opinions...

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jyothi

@pjyo

Rocker

Posted: 14 years ago

#32

One thing i don't understand about anandi not continuing studies-She came 1st in 10 after just studying 2 weeks and had a whole press conference after that,then she completed 11th and 12th with whole year to study so logically she should have come 1st in 12th as well..😉So wasn't there another press conference by a bunch of reporters who put the thoughts of further education in her mind..? Didn't bhairav even ask her about higher studies after that,if he can construct a huge hospital for his son why no college for anandi?He said to jagya 'i could get you a flat in mumbai',if so then he could have done it earlier and sent anandi too ,that way she could have studied in mumbai college...🤔

But i guess the CVs just need an uneducated,suffering anandi for TRPs ...

@avyarima-really enjoyed reading your perspective and iam really glad you got that opportunity to go to school👍🏼

Edited by pjyo - 14 years ago

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deep153134

@deep153134

Explorer

Posted: 14 years ago

#33

Originally posted by: nureat01

But aren't there BIGGER questions at this point other than the HOW of why Anandi was left uneducated? However it came to be...does that give Jagat Maharaj the right to shun her and discard her as a gawaar??

Anandi has made mistakes no doubt and she is a whiny crybaby too but at this moment she definitely deserves sympathy as well given just HOW big of a kameena insaan Jagya has turned out to be.

Can we really say Anandi deserved this and brought this upon herself honestly?? Cuz that seems to be Jagya's stance...oh I was saddled to her and now I have no compatibility with a "gawaar" so I'm peacing out...how convenient.

Lets take the case of our metropolitan towns, i have many friends (all above age 25) who married with their choice (love as well as arranged) , and its so comman these days that even after marriage people are pursuing higher studies .. sometimes the wives dont qiut their jobs in India and the husbands have gone Uk or USA for completing MBA or MS in medical for 2 years.. plan to get their wives later.. I am seeing this happenin a lot these days... If all these men thought like Jagya saying, I have good matches with girls who are studyin here as they think the same as I, She has done MBA too and she very well has adjusted to living in UK/US... ...??

I am saying that at diffrent points it may happen, lives change due to circumstances and if you keep trying to get a new partner everytime you step higher in the ladder in life.. you are never satisfied and it doesnt work that way...

Jagya knows it very well if he wanted his wife to be well educated like his counterparts he should have tried to encourage her rather than insulting... Since he considers himself as educated chap he could have supported her in choosing right courses and colleges for her.. More than anything he could have convinced Dadisa...Anandi tried to learn accessing internet tried to make herself smart according to city standards. Jagya knows and we all know well if Anandi stays in mumbai for even 2 months she will learn all the new things.. she is very adaptablle especially when dadisa wont be around to stop her. All that jagya did was insult her rfrom the beginning rather than teaching her..he could have taught her internet could have convinced dadisa to let A use his laptop. i never saw him teaching her or exposing her to anything right from his day 1 in college.

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AreYaar

@AreYaar

Icon

+ 19

Posted: 14 years ago

#34

Originally posted by: avyarima

We all watched Anandi grow, but we dont really wear the shoes...right? I am marriedmyself at a young age to a wonderful man (16 years older) , more educated, we live with his family too, from his dad, mom, sister, brothers...the only difference between Anandi and I is that i have the best husband in the world and that's one of the reasons am going to school.

I can relate to Anandi alot. I cant really know how she is feels, but somehow i understand why she left school( dont support that), most of us are fortunate to know better, but she grew up in a village women dont even sit when men are sitting( i see that from the show) Thus this girl only believes in making her family happy before thinking about herself. Remember even when she want to school, she said she is doing it so she will e worthy of her husband.

Our thinking thanks to God, is different than hers, and i am not justifying her leaving school, i just wanted us to understand why is acts like these. She was trained to forget herself for other(remember she took a bullet) Lets be real! if you dont understand why she was ready to die for her husband when she was just a child, we will not understand what this marriage meant her her.

To tell you the truth if someone else dont come in to her life and help her see the other side of life Anandi will keep waiting there for Jagya to return to her. (i hate that), but we are talking reality. Her in laws supported her, but didnt really try to change her thinking into thinking modern and teacherji is also disappearing ( i dont know to where)...lol.

Gauri on the other hand found someone who is well educated to not only support her, but to mentor her though her life thats why she thinks differently, She is lucky, just like i am( in my case its my sweet husband). Even her parents didnt know anything about her, that's why they are surprise to see her as a doctor. if she had stayed in that village she will be worst than Anandi. i LOVE HER COURAGE! The only thing i dont like was her trusting Jagya after her uncle/mentor doesnt( she should have know atleast his family first) even if they dont like her, she should know who he is and where he comes from( before moving in with him).she is just following her heart not her brains. (dont expect that from a girl who went through alot in her life). Its sad.

So when you are comparing those two girls, you have to think who? why? who? what? when?...than if all answers are thesame, Judge whoever you feel like judging.
But hey! its my opinion...

Great points👏👏...I like how you put forth balanced viewpoints for both Anandi as well as Gauri...it is easy to keep on applauding Gauri but one has to see the extremely different circumstances that Gauri and Anandi faced as well...Like I said before, Anandi did make a lot of mistakes and it cant be justified that she gave up her studies to become a mahaan sati savitri...but given her circumstances, the ppl and situations she was surrounded with...even if we don't understand her mindset, we can see why it happened...Gauri ended up being luckier in more ways.

Unlike in the case of that disgusting Jagya who lives to blame everything on his "child marriage" to get away with it...now THAT excuse SO doesn't cut it👎🏼

The worst thing that the writers of this show have done is to show Jagya using this "child marriage" excuse to supposedly show the evils of child marriage...oh please...this is beyond all that now...the only evils they are showing are how a SPOILT BRAT becomes more selfish, cowardly and manipulative than ever in his life thanks to his grandmother, his family and ultimately his weeping wife spoiling him rotten by always letting him get his way...and in the end they've created this MONSTER in front of them today...who doesn't love anyone but himself and is now going to end up ruining more lives and breaking more hearts than those of just the two women involved in this scenario.

This isn't about the evils of child marriage...this is about the evils of bad parenting😆...Since Jagya will only look for excuses to justify himself, correct? We can't ever blame HIM ofcourse...something from the surroundings only must be responsible.

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AreYaar

@AreYaar

Icon

+ 19

Posted: 14 years ago

#35

Originally posted by: deep153134
Lets take the case of our metropolitan towns, i have many friends (all above age 25) who married with their choice (love as well as arranged) , and its so comman these days that even after marriage people are pursuing higher studies .. sometimes the wives dont qiut their jobs in India and the husbands have gone Uk or USA for completing MBA or MS in medical for 2 years.. plan to get their wives later.. I am seeing this happenin a lot these days... If all these men thought like Jagya saying, I have good matches with girls who are studyin here as they think the same as I, She has done MBA too and she very well has adjusted to living in UK/US... ...??

I am saying that at diffrent points it may happen, lives change due to circumstances and if you keep trying to get a new partner everytime you step higher in the ladder in life.. you are never satisfied and it doesnt work that way...

Jagya knows it very well if he wanted his wife to be well educated like his counterparts he should have tried to encourage her rather than insulting... Since he considers himself as educated chap he could have supported her in choosing right courses and colleges for her.. More than anything he could have convinced Dadisa...Anandi tried to learn accessing internet tried to make herself smart according to city standards. Jagya knows and we all know well if Anandi stays in mumbai for even 2 months she will learn all the new things.. she is very adaptablle especially when dadisa wont be around to stop her. All that jagya did was insult her rfrom the beginning rather than teaching her..he could have taught her internet could have convinced dadisa to let A use his laptop. i never saw him teaching her or exposing her to anything right from his day 1 in college.

Well said...yes Anandi lacked courage but Jagya also went OUT OF HIS WAY to TRAMPLE on her self-esteem any time she succeeded...the few times her intelligence and aptitude showed in her success by topping the exams or any other thing, this loser would burn with jealousy...even after him "growing up" nothing has really changed...he's just as much of an immature loser now as ever.

Like someone made a great point a few pages back...Anandi now has the psychology of a trauma victim...with her self-esteem totally destroyed so that she clings on to only Jagya and doesn't think of having any life beyond him...and blames herself for everything just like he blamed her too...she desperately needs to get away from all this and find a person who ACTUALLY supports her in life and gives her the confidence to start afresh...

But I doubt the writers of this show will show that maturity...they are more interested in reaping TRP benefits from showing a constantly crying and spineless Anandi...there are never any solutions...only more problems...3 years on and that is all they've shown in this show.

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vidyasu1

@vidyasu1

Explorer

Posted: 14 years ago

#36

Deep153.. agree with all your points. I still remember the heartbreak anandi suffered when she emailed Jagya and he was furious with her for learning to use the net. He asked her rudely if learning to use the net meant she had progressed in life. DS promptly locked away the computer. The problem I see in this discussion so far is this: everybody agrees jagya is a slime but there is an impression that he and Gauri are modern as opposed to Anandi who is constantly bashed for being regressive. In my view Jagya is the most regressive, backward person among all the characters. His parents are truly modern -- the way they treat their bahu is just so wonderful to watch. Jagya thinks living in Mumbai and wearing city clothes equals being modern -- that shows how little he has evolved. And this business of lying ( here I refuse to excuse Gowri: It is impossible that her parents will not know about her situation without her actively lying) is so uncool. Jagya is small-minded and uncool no matter how much he tries to be a city-slicker. And being broad-minded is not about living in the city. It is an attitude, a state of mind.

And divmath, please, if you do not mind, I have a request: please (forgive me if I have offended you) try not to use such harsh language against pratyusha. I don't celebrate gowri, nor do i find her cute (more stupid, giggly and silly, actually) but I don't hate her character or the actress. In terms of acting, at least according to me, Pratyusha is head and shoulders above the actor who plays Gowri. Look at how Pratyusha played her illness and contrast it with Gowri-actor's unconvincing portrayal of a typhoid patient. Gowri just didn't look sick. Earlier, the devastation Pratyusha showed when Jagya taunted and tormented her in Mumbai -- was splendid. Her grief was so beautifully expressed. I would request the forum not to bash the actor: she does not deserve it, esp not given how talented she is. Yes when Pratyusha started out, she seemed a shadow of Avika but she has grown into her role -- a role which is very different from the chirpy character Avika played as a child.

Also it is important to understand Anandi: I don't like it when she cries; nor do I like her Jagya jaap but I try to see it from the perspective of her background. Please recall how all hell broke loose when DS learnt of her secretly studying for the tenth. DS went into a HUGE sulk, refused to talk to the family, laid guilt trips on Anandi and her son and DIL. On top of that, there was Jagya being nasty and mean and jealous over Anandi's success. I constantly interact with urban girls from very poor background and their conditioning is very very different. From childhood they are taught that boys are superior; they fast for their brothers without ever asking why the brothers don't fast for them. It is their reality. We may find it unaccetable but they do not know of or want any other life. Let us assume for a moment that Anandi defied DS and went on to study. DS would have thrown Anandi out or else feigned massive hut and made a godawful production of how the family matriarch has been mistreated by her son's family. I can in fact picture DS going on a fast unto death. Basant would have surely crumbled and scolded Anandi and Bhairon for being selfish and hurting DS. If A went to her mother's , her parents would have lectured her about patni dharam. A's mother insisted that she keep her patni dharam by going to mumbai: how will she have pursued her studies in this hostile environment? Of course she could have been defiant but it is simply not as easy as it has been made out.

If A's world is Jagya, she has been taught that from childhood. I am sure she will change, but to expect dramatic change overnight is to be unrealistic. Forget Anandi, educated working urban women breakdown when faced with the unfaithfulness of their husbands. I have friends who have gone into depression unable to accept rejection. Rejection is a horrid, deep wound. Let us give Anandi time to heal instead of abusing her and hating her.

And finally, I once again ask a question that people have neatly by-passed: Why are the CVs showing Gowri-Jagya match? Why couldn't Gowri be just another girl? Weren't J-G tnvolved in a child marriage? The symbolism of the sindoor is precisely to show that they have been previously married. To show that they have not met accidentally but by divine design, because of their past association. And am pretty sure, jagya will use the fact of his childhood marriage with Gowri to buy the consent of DS. It wouldn't mattet to him that in the case of Anandi he had used child marriage as an excuse to dump her. I think this part is the truly regressive part of the serial. Supposedly against child marriage but nonetheless showing that it is sacred: Mind you I think Balika Vadhu is superb in terms of acting -- shashank and Anoop are mind-blowing in the way they can portray the smallest emotions -- in terms of dramatic content and in terms of intellectual engagement. But am not sure of the message.

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redapple1

@redapple1

Voyager

Posted: 14 years ago

#37

What does unpad actually mean? Is it illiterate or not a highschool graduate or not a college graduate? My mother tongue is not hindi, so I am asking. So according to Jagya if one's husband holds a phD degree then the wife also should have the same level of degree. That is too much to ask for.

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AreYaar

@AreYaar

Icon

+ 19

Posted: 14 years ago

#38

Originally posted by: vidyasu1

And finally, I once again ask a question that people have neatly by-passed: Why are the CVs showing Gowri-Jagya match? Why couldn't Gowri be just another girl? Weren't J-G tnvolved in a child marriage? The symbolism of the sindoor is precisely to show that they have been previously married. To show that they have not met accidentally but by divine design, because of their past association. And am pretty sure, jagya will use the fact of his childhood marriage with Gowri to buy the consent of DS. It wouldn't mattet to him that in the case of Anandi he had used child marriage as an excuse to dump her. I think this part is the truly regressive part of the serial. Supposedly against child marriage but nonetheless showing that it is sacred: Mind you I think Balika Vadhu is superb in terms of acting -- shashank and Anoop are mind-blowing in the way they can portray the smallest emotions -- in terms of dramatic content and in terms of intellectual engagement. But am not sure of the message.

@bold: I agree...THAT is the truly regressive part of this show indeed...they aren't going to show any "evils" of child marriage...conveniently when the time comes, Jagya will suddenly be alll for child marriage if it helps him justify his relationship with his current obsession i.e. Gauri.

The message has longgg been lost...the show only thrives on contrived drama and theatrics now...they only put up a front of giving out a "message"...basically this has become another Colors show with a man struggling b/w his two wives...just like that Uttaran show😆

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AreYaar

@AreYaar

Icon

+ 19

Posted: 14 years ago

#39

Originally posted by: redapple1
What does unpad actually mean? Is it illiterate or not a highschool graduate or not a college graduate? My mother tongue is not hindi, so I am asking. So according to Jagya if one's husband holds a phD degree then the wife also should have the same level of degree. That is too much to ask for.

Anpadh means illiterate. As for Jagya's definition of gawaar...lol...he conveniently labels whoever he wants to label as gawaar...but the biggest GAWAAR in all this is Jagat Maharaj himself...

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redapple1

@redapple1

Voyager

Posted: 14 years ago

#40

Originally posted by: nureat01

Anpadh means illiterate. As for Jagya's definition of gawaar...lol...he conveniently labels whoever he wants to label as gawaar...but the biggest GAWAAR in all this is Jagat Maharaj himself...

Thanks. How is Anandi illiterate then? I love your nickname for Jagya, Jagat Maharaj. He has the audacity to call Anandi unpad 😕