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Chapter 14

Lakshman was on his way back. Actually, he had gone towards Kashi only when a thought had stuck him. Why was he going to Kashi? Can't he get the peace he is searching with his wife. Urmila has waited fourteen years for him. Sita bhabi is her sister. Who will understand his pain better than her? Was it necessary again to go away from her? Then he had realized there was no need to go anywhere. The sanctuary he searched was readily available to him in his wife. He decided to return to Ayodhya. The gifts for Kashi he will send was via messengers.

Now as the distance to Ayodhya was getting reduced Lakshman was feeling happy and lighter.

Urmila sat decorating her room. She had kept specially designed aroma diyas in the nook and corner of the room. Lakshman had loved them. Then she arranged the curtains and kept flowers the way he liked them. Once she was satisfied with the decoration she decided to dress up. Dress herself in the bridal red once again. She was going to wear it after so many years. But she had decided she will wear that only. It was going to be a new beginning for their life. It was like they have been married again.

Urmila called her chaperons and started dressing up. She blushed as the chaperons giggled as they bathed her in milk and did her hair sringaar first. Then as they put each jewellery talking about Lakshman Urmila turned red and the chaperons giggled more and wished their princess all the best. She was almost ready when the footman announced Prince Lakshman has arrived and will come to her room very soon.

Urmila looked at the chaperons and dismissed them. Then she began to adjust her pallu looking at the mirror. Then she heard footsteps. The sound she was waiting for all those years. She wants to look up and see his reflection in the mirror. But she closed her eyes feeling that sound as it moved nearer. She felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned gently still her eyes closed.

Lakshman held her shoulders and whispered softly "Urmila.

Tears flowed from Urmila's eyes uncontrollably. But they were the tears of happiness as she felt the pain, she held in her heart getting washed away. She gently opened her eyes and opened her eyes looking at the face of her husband. They stood looking at each other in silence and then suddenly Lakshman knelt down.

"Urmila help me my wife. I can't get over the image of Sita bhabi sitting in that jungle broken and helpless. How could I be so hard heartened. How could I leave bhabi there? She is pregnant. How much she had loved me and taken care of me during vanvass. Still what I gave her. Abandonment.

It was my mistake I left her alone that day in our hut. Yes, she was worried it was Ram bhaiyya's voice. But I was sure it was not bhaiyya. I could have just stepped out from ashram and stayed nearby only away from her vision. If I was there, I would have never allowed Ravan to touch bhabi. But I was a fool, I was hurt by her words and went in search of Ram bhaiyya. Then that Ravan cheated bhabi and took her. Now the world is blaming bhabi and bhaiyya has been forced to abandon her. "

Urmila sat beside him and took the crestfallen face of her husband in her hands, "Sumitranandan you can't change what happened. See what happened was destiny. Do you think you could have defeated Ravan easily? Ravan killed the mighty Jatayu. He would have harmed you and still took didi. But if you were critically injured what would Ram jeeju had done. Sita didi had told me how much broken Ram jeeju was when you were hit with Meghanadh's Brahmastra. That time Hanuman was there to help you. But in the hut, there would have been none. Without you Ram bhaiyya would have never undertook the journey to Kishkinda and then to Lanka.

Now coming to Sita didi's abandonment. Maa Sumitra already talked about it and I agree to her. If that is not enough, I have some news of Sita didi for you.

"News of bhabi. But how, Lakshman looked at his wife in bewilderment. Urmila made her husband sit on the bed. Then she talked about the network she had created to collect information about him during vanvass.

"Sumitranandan once you had left for Kashi, I realized I could have stopped you. By letting you know about my network. I had felt so sad that I had imposed this separation between us, myself. You don't know my happiness when I received the information you were coming back. Sumitranandan give me a chance. Allow me to heal all your wounds.

Lakshman kept his head on her lap and closed his eyes. Urmila continued, "Sumitranandan my trusted sources have informed me that Sita didi is in Valmiki ashram. Sage Valmiki has provided her shelter there. Most important Hanuman in disguise is there in the ashram to take care of her.

Lakshman got up astonished and held Urmila's cheeks, "Hanuman in ashram, that means...

"Sumitranandan that means this abandonment of didi by Ram jeeju is an eyewash for this society. He has not abandoned her. Hanuman can't be there without Ram jeeju knowledge. Ram jeeju has sent his most trusted and efficient person to take care of bhabi and his unborn child. We just have to play along with Ram jeeju. As ma Sumitra said time will reveal what Ram jeeju wants to achieve with this action of his.

Lakshman smiled. It was as if a burden was taken off his chest. His heart was right. The solution to his problem was with Urmila. He pulled her closer and as if in cue Urmila kept her head on his chest and he wrapped his arms around her.

It was a long journey for them to reach this point. To once again start their life as a couple. To understand each other better. And at that point as the rain drizzled outside, they were finally at peace in each other's arms.

Epilogue

Urmila looked at her sister and Ram jeeju. They were in Valmiki ashram. Twelve years had gone by and Ram jeeju's two sons Luv and Kush were teenagers and had stopped the Aswamedha horse. The ensuing fight had revealed who they were. Everyone wanted to bring the boys and Sita didi back to Ayodhya. So, they all had gone as a royal procession to bring back Sita didi.

But things were not looking good. Sita didi had refused to come and Ram jeeju had apologizing to her. Didi was mercilessly questioning her abandonment. The people of Ayodhya stood terrified in front of the Durga. It felt as if she will destroy the entire Ayodhya with the fire within her.

People fell at the feet of the woman asking her to calm down. Even Lakshman was pleading with is bhabi. But Urmila knew her didi had taken the decision and she felt her jeeju was aware of it. Ma Sumitra was correct. Ram jeeju knew what he was doing twelve years back. Today he had brought the entire Ayodhya at his wife's feet crying out for her mercy. The society that questioned the pure woman and rejoiced in her abandonment were now telling her forgive him. Urmila was jolted back as she heard her didi calling out to Mother Earth.

None knew what was happening as earth shook and thunder happened in the skies. As people looked on a circle of fire was formed where Sita was standing and then the earth split into two and Bhudevi emerged in her throne. Before anyone could understand what was happening, she took Sita in her lap and disappeared. Within no time the earth was back in place and it looked like nothing happened. Sita was gone. Mahalakshmi had gone rejecting the system that rejected her.

Urmila shivered in fear as she saw Ram jeeju taking the bow in anger shouting that he will destroy the earth that took his Sita. But he was calmed down by Hanuman followed by his children and other children of Ayodhya. Urmila heaved a sigh of relief. Ram jeeju's love for children had saved earth and Ayodhya that day. But she felt the new dawn that was promised at the time of coronation of Ram was coming soon.

That night Urmila and Lakshman discussed about the incident in the Valmiki ashram. Lakshman told her he doesn't know what was in his bhaiyya's mind but soon Ayodhya will know it. Ayodhya has taken his beloved Sita and he was not going to leave the system of Ayodhya just like that. He wants to prove to his sons he is a good husband who had loved their mother immensely.

"Sumitranandan I know. Ram jeeju will crave for the love and respect of Luv and Kush. For that he will have to give proof that going forward in Ayodhya a woman will be respected. I am still thankful to Maa Sumitra who could foresee all this. Else what would have happened to us, unknowingly some tears fell from Urmila's eyes.

Lakshman wiped her tears and pulled her closer. "Urmila Lord Narayan is always with us that is why Maa Sumitra came at the right time that day. Else with the mistakes I had committed I would have lost you forever.

"Sumitranandan there was mistake from my side too. You didn't come to me, but I could have come to you. But now we should forget all that. Tomorrow is going to be a big day. For all the sufferings we have undertaken our children are going to get something better tomorrow, concluded Sumitra and Lakshman nodded.

The sun rose in the east and Ayodhya geared up for the important announcement that was coming their way. The royal court was happening in the open auditorium and the galleries were also filled. The open court happened only in rare occasions and everyone knew that was a landmark day which will be remembered in golden letters in the history of Ayodhya.

There was pin drop silence as Ram entered the court and sat on the throne. He looked around and after getting the required approval from guru Vashisth for whatever he was planning to implement he rose and addressed the gathering.

"Sita, the queen of Ayodhya my beloved wife and mother of Princes Luv and Kush left Ayodhya because of the injustice happened to her. She did this sacrifice for the betterment of women of Ayodhya and I don't want the queen's sacrifice to go in vain.

So, I have decided that from today no man can send away his daughter or wife or sister from the house just because he thinks the society doesn't want her. If any woman faces such abandonment, she can approach the royal court and she will be given justice. The property of father hereon will belong to the daughter and the property of husband from hereon will belong to wife also.

A woman brings up next generation. So, it is important that the state looks into her welfare. Without delay these new rules will be implemented in Ayodhya. Let no other woman in Ayodhya suffer Sita's fate.

As Ram concluded his speech there was all round applause. But Urmila could feel her jeeju's pain in each word he spoke and as he came down trying to hide his tears, he indicated her husband to follow him. Lakshman was needed at this brother's side at that point. Only he knew the journey his bhaiyya and bhabi had taken. As Lakshman walked toward Ram Urmila looked at her husband proudly. Yes, he was the celebrated brother and she always wanted him to be that. Because without him Ayodhya would have never seen this dawn.

Epilogue

Radha's love is a song of oblation, a perennial flow of joy. Her life was nothing but the story of love and longing. For her, the meaning of life was to give and keep giving! Her eyes were filled with an ocean of worship with waves of longing for Him.

Though I am an ardent fan and worshipper of the purity, divinity, intensity, romance, and myth associated with the Radha-Krishna's love saga, there is always one thing that bothered me about Krishna's decision to part with her towards the later part of their lives... how can a God be helpless and leave his most beloved person behind and never look back? How could a person who doled equal amount of love, respect and care to all his wives, be unable to do a little for the love of his life, his Pranadhika Radhika!

Was he helpless and incapable only when it came to Radha? No, he wasn't! I firmly believe that Krishna, the God of love, never separated from his Radha! She was always with him and he carried her in his heart; in all circumstances, she walked with him, holding his hand as his guiding force; though invisible to the human eye, together they were till eternity.

No other goddess combines the elements of Bhakti and Shringara quite as exquisitely as this divine milkmaid! Radha spans a vivid rainbow of imagery from the playfulness of Raas Leela to the soulfulness of her undying love for Him. This is the eternal story of the mysterious Radha, the epitome of love, who defied all conventional codes, yet transcended social prohibitions through the power of her spiritual and sensual/metaphysical love.

Radha, the bucolic milkmaid, followed the dictates of her heart, her instincts, her passion, to seek union with her innermost self, her Krishna! She was her own mistress even in the act of surrender to her beloved! And it is this aspect of her identity that is worshipped since ages.

We've heard great epic love stories, but they always had a happy ending. The crux of the Krishna-Radha story, however, was a gnawing longing for each other. They spent only a short span of time together and then there was a never-ending separation between them.

The Radha-Krishna romance epitomized real love, which was sweet, tender and passionate, surpassed words and remained a surreal experience beyond all human comprehension. Radha is forever the embodiment of pure love and no one can be a greater devotee than her.

It is interesting to know what transpired after that brief visit of Krishna on that fateful night.

The next morning after Krishna's visit --

Just like lightning, He visited her; she was in a daze, in a state of confusion. It all seemed like a dream to her. She looked around; the river Yamuna confirmed His presence with its wavelets. A memory of a soothing melody awakened her inner thoughts. "Yes, a few moments back He was with me, in my arms, I had entwined myself in His embrace!" She was exhilarated by the thought of the night's events. How she had longed for His darshan! When the waiting ended and the next meeting happened, what transpired in between, why it ended so soon? She was besieged by a whirlpool of emotions.

Time was moving like life's shadow, space has its own myriad ways to bring out the day from night. In those serene surroundings, she tried to revive the earlier night's dream. But her eyes refused to dream, though shut. He has there embedded on her eyelids. Her heart said with a wave of happiness, 'He is here for me, with me, within me, in my heartbeat!'

Slowly the village started waking up; the gopikas were heading to the river with empty pots to carry water in them. She started walking on the river bank recounting all those night long memories. She tried to inquire within and search who she really was at her core! She had immersed herself in a million magical moments, both transient and real, thoughts without words.

With each stride, her mind became clearer, more resolute, as if the growing physical distance between them had now become an emotional chasm. Her eyes became misty and a few droplets appeared in the corners of her eyes... she continued walking.

Suddenly she wiped her tears and in an effort to contain the turmoil within and hide her emotions, she hurried along. She was a maiden on a walk with an attitude of a warrior returning to the battlefield, in which she had to fight with her hankering, with that inevitable separation from her beloved and with that void she had to live from now on, and that walk of longing would last her whole life.

At that moment, she was looking like a sculpture carved by the ocean and installed on the sky! "The imprints of His feet are here, the music of His flute has amalgamated as the melody of the breeze, His love for me is imbibed in every bud and flower which will bloom every morning and spread His love as a sweet fragrance in Brindavan from now on," She thought.

While coming to the river, the milkmaids saw Radha going towards Nand's house, with luminosity on her face which had made the surroundings effulgent!

They were surprised and ran towards her. Vakula perceptively glanced at her, was astonished and questioned her, "Radha, how did you get that orange tilak on your chest? Why girl, why your cheeks are smeared with vermillion streaks? Why your eyes turned red, did you not sleep the previous night? Why are you looking like that? What is the meaning of that fulfilling smile amidst those flowing tears, Radha? What happened?"

She was startled for a while and her silence made them eager to know the reason. "Wake me not sakhis, wake me not from this reverie, from this bliss so deep. One Radha was enough for Him, but many Krishnas visited me at night! Do you know? Krishna was here last night!"

They dismissed her claim by looking at each other with a grin. They thought that it must be one more of her innumerable illusions.

With an emphatic tone, she implored, "Believe me; He was with me, talked with me while resting His head on my lap." Radha was in joyful elation, her sensations were ample and in series, and in her phantasmic trance, a smile of innocence and experience brought a wave of sweet earthly joy to her appearance.

The intoxicating Kasturi [ musk] fragrance around her surprised them. That was familiar to them; it was their Krishna's sweet fragrance! She was in trance, didn't reply. There was a peacock feather stuck on her chest, they took it in their hands to look at it observantly! There was a pink floral garland adorning her neck. They never saw those flowers in Brindavan!

Vaishnavi exclaimed, "Look at this side, here are the marks of the chariot wheels, someone had come!" They looked at each other with wide eyes in disbelief! Reality dawned on them! Krishna was here, for sure! They were totally flabbergasted! They looked at her with a thousand doubts; they asked her many questions at once!

She smiled a little, a smile with a twist to it; it looked like the smile of a child who was determined not to cry!

With a low voice, Radha started narrating the reason behind his visit,

"He was here to share His grief, the grief for the upcoming, all-pervasive war. Sorrow for the destruction it amasses on mankind. He is going as a messenger to meet the enemies now. While going, he halted here for a while to seek the blessings of his motherland, His Brindavan, and from the river Yamuna. He said if I meet my sakhis and Maa Yashoda, I may not be able to leave this place again. This is why he visited this place without anyone's notice and left for Hasthinapur with a peace proposal for them."

With wide eyes, they stared at her, awestruck. "You met Him Radha? How lucky you are! Your penance for Him was successfully completed with His darshan!"

"Radha, how does He look now? We saw Him many years back as a prankster, a young boy! Does He still remember all of us with whom He played blissfully in those halcyon days?"

With a smile, she said, "Now he looks like a savior of humanity, a preacher to mankind. I have seen commitment in His glowing eyes, Vaishnavi. War and peace are His two eyes now, one for extinguishing the enmity and the other for propagating unity. He wants to save the kings and the knights from that sin inflicting conflict. I have seen a God with flowing peace from His divine eyes."

"Alas, we haven't seen Him! He left before we realized His presence!" Vakula spoke in a broken voice.

"Vakula, He didn't leave us. His thoughts are imprinted on our souls to lift the spiritual being in us! He is present in every new life on this earth, to spread love and bliss in this universe. We are small wavelets which push life's flow towards the vast sea of devotion and unites with His ultimate love. Let us carry this love as the perennial dhara through every river and bower. Let us strengthen those shoulders that are bearing the responsibilities of this entire universe, through our worship."

Radha was talking like a saint in deep meditation. Nature was listening to her words with wonder and awe! She was defining love and life as a divine message. Her words sounded like hymns of love, giving new definition to that pure bliss!

The blush of love flashed across the sakhis' faces and Radha's tears of joy streamed down her cheeks.

They touched her hands with revere. They were happy beyond words. They felt that by meeting Radha, He met all of them! They saw Krishna in her eyes.

"My Krishna hasn't gone anywhere! He is with me, forever we are together!" Radha started walking towards Yashoda's house.

She walked a few steps, but His soft touch came to her mind and she smiled. She took some more steps and the recollection of His embrace stopped her. Krishna, your hug is the only treasure I have in this world today. You carried the best part of me with you. Without you, I'm not me anymore,' she talked to herself.

In that dawn, the sweet rhythmic sound of cowherd maidens churning curd was ringing in every house, as the milkmaids were singing glories of their prankster Krishna. Those dulcet tunes created a wordless melody in her heart. Radha looked at the horizon, she saw a light coalescing the earth and the sky. Wisdom dawned on her, as she gazed into the endlessness of the bright sky. The dusty path under her feet was silently writing the Radha Krishna stories of love on the heart of the earth to preserve these for future generations! -----

Now and then, she heard stories from wandering yogis and sadhus, who told of Krishna's exploits and conquests, of the Kurukshetra war, of his great teachings to Arjuna on the battlefield. Radha smiled a secret smile and knew that she was there with him when all that was happening.

This story is pure fiction, written from Radha's perspective. I tried to recreate from reliable sources of mythology, a sublime saga of their iconic love in their brief association together. This is an endeavor to lend a new definition and meaning to Radha's love. For me, she was a protagonist with decisive powers over her Krishna, and she as His Sakhi and Shakti, had motivated Him to be an inspirational teacher and preacher.

Radha and Krishna's romance is complete and sanguine... the lilting tunes of his flute linger long after their bower stood empty, waiting for two lovers to reunite in their comforting embrace in future because time knew that together they were timeless! [ 17000 words]