Arakshi FF:Tum Dena Saath Mera [Note-45] - Page 14

Chapter 4

Sakshi walked back to her cabin and slumped on the chair. Heavily! As heavily as her eyes and heart were at this moment. Ironically what needed to be lightened just couldn't be. She could not let herself go weak. Weak at this moment. Weak at any moment. But her eyes denied it. It just pushed away tears, with the flow similar to that of a river after the dam is opened.

She had to rush to the washroom to hide herself. Luckily there was no one present at that moment. She immediately locked the door and rushed to the basin to flash water on herself. Only after that she had the courage to look at her. The water droplets on her face did the work of a very poor makeup to hide her tears, her flaws at present. She knew her life, the circumstances in the past, present and future demanded her to be strong. Her brain was quite aware of this. And it had been successful enough to keep her heart also strong. But it was like painting a hard layer, a shield over a very soft heart. I little hole in the shield, and the soft heart was in great danger.

The circumstances after joining ETF had already acted like a harsh environment for the shield, but today's case had gives her a deep scratch on it.

She looked at her reflection but her mind drifted back away to five years earlier. Those months, those days, those moments. With him. The sweet ones, the bitter ones and at last the most painful one.

She held hair and pulled it, hurting herself. While her mouth opened wide to let out a scream. A loud scream and slumped down on the floor. Its intensity was enough to shake up the entire huge building of the ETF and maybe travel to the nearby areas to. But only if it was heard.

Over the years she has practice and experience of screaming silent shrieks. Only if she could voice it out. Only then she could have been exhausted and tired and then finally shut up. But she knew she could not do that. She can't let others see or hear her pain.

So she decided to rise up. She washed her face. Tried to step back into her stern look.

She rushed to her room before being noticed by anyone. She then grabbed her purse, took out her Kajal and drew her eyes.

She then fetched out a tiny mirror from a pocket and studied herself. 'Not bad. The kajal covered up my swollen eyes. But its my attitude that is required to cover myself. Come on Sakshi, get back to ETF mode.'

She laid out a deep breath and walked out of her room to complete the rest of the hours in the office, eagerly waiting to go home and pass out on the bed.

Sakshi tried her level best to ignore the two juniors who were acting less like a responsible police officer but more like two irritating bees buzzing near her ears.

"Yaar! Shree, did you notice Rathod sir today? What he did today he had never done before."

"I know. It is quite shocking. If Arjun sir would have done, then I would at least not be so surprised. We know how he is. But Rathod sir' Still can't believe. He never breaks any code." Shree said.

Chotu nodded his head, in agreement then suddenly came with another point.

"But Shree, I was wondering why was Rathod sir looking at Sakshi that way? Did you see the tears in his eyes and there was also some kind of regret in his expressions. Did you notice?"

"Yeah! I did." Shree replied slowly, getting uncomfortable due to Sakshi being brought in.

"Do you think Sakshi is responsible for Rathod sir's behavior?" Chotu enquired.

Shree hesitated a bit to answer. He glanced at Sakshi through the corner of his eyes. He didn't want to speak anything, even slightly, against Sakshi. Unknowingly he had started liking her. He liked being with her, she was someone whom he always desired for, An Elder Sister. He had wished for a big sister, whose legs he could pull, who could shout at him when he was wrong, laugh at his jokes no matter how silly it would be. And Love like a mother, take care of him like a mother. Weren't elder sisters just that? A second mother to the younger siblings. Unfortunately, he had none. Then he did find a slight trait of and Elder Sister's love in Riya, but God had decided to pull her towards him early.

But then, Sakshi came. Exactly the sister his heart wished for. He knew that even if she didn't show, she cared for him. Laughed at his antics, shouted on his carelessness, protected him from Rathod Sir or Arjun Sir (at times). She had given him the best gift on his birthday. His favorite dish, fish curry with rice. She had made it with her own hands. He couldn't believe when he first saw that. His heart was filled with joy. He missed his mother's cooking, after her death and he was really bad at it. He was delighted to taste some PROPER home-cooked food. It was so delicious that he had licked his fingers, to which Sakshi laughed and had said that if she would have known at he would lick his fingers like this, then she would make and bring it everyday for him. He had asked her to do that. And then all of a sudden her smile disappeared.

That's what pained him at times. He had taken the love she provided, but was not able to make her accept his love. He would enjoy the happiness she brought in his life, but was never able to make her happy. There was something that was troubling her. Always. Ever since she had entered ETF. He also knew that Rathod sir and Arjun sir were also connected to this. They might know the reason for her this behavior. But who was the brave person to ask them, not him surely.

So he would be happy the time, she laughed at his antics, at least sometime he could may her laugh. At times, she would also comment back, there would be a sparkle in her eyes then. This indicated that she was not always like this, she was a bubbly girl sometime. Something happened. Something that made her the Sakshi she is. And no one knew what. Again, may be both his bosses did, and he was jealous of them. He was jealous that they knew more about her. He wished he did too.

But mostly he wished to somehow wipe the sorrow away from her life. Be a part of her life. Have that elder sister he always desired. To put his head on her lap and let her pat his head till he falls asleep.

"Shree!" Chotu hissed.

Shree snapped back from his thoughts. "What?"

"What do you think?" He asked.

"About what?" Shree asked.

"Arre! About the thing I told you, that Rathod sir and Sakshi'" But he could never complete. As someone else interrupted, a bit loudly.

She tried her best to ignore them, but at last she just couldn't.

"What is your problem? Can't you two be quite and complete the work piled up on your head? I know you have time, but what is the harm if you finish it in advance?" Sakshi scolded them.

"Sorry Ma'am." Both murmured.

They immediately resumed back. Sakshi got up to fetch herself some water. As soon as her turned her back to them and moved a few steps, Chotu couldn't stop himself from whispering.

"I told you nah, that Sakshi and Rathod sir has'"

He could not complete as Sakshi sharp ears had caught that and she turned to glare at Chotu. Poor thing, then didn't gather the guts to look up from his file for one hour.

Sakshi completed her paperwork along with Shree and Chotu. Arjun and Rathod had not returned yet. They had lot to deal with today.

Sakshi looked at her watch, it was 7:00 pm only. But she didn't mind going home early. She packed her stuff and was leaving when she suddenly spotted Sania in the hall, crying bitterly.

She heard her wailing, "Its all my fault. Its all my fault."

Liza was sitting beside her and trying to console her. But she just couldn't stop crying.

Sakshi had slowed down her tracks to look at the scene. But snapping back, she wanted to just rush away from this scene. She fastened her steps, but suddenly Shree came in her path.

"What happened Shree?"

"Ma'am, see Sania is crying so hard. She is blaming herself for this. We tried to calm her down, but she is not listening. Ma'am you know nah, that whatever happened is not her fault."

Sakshi let out a deep breath after his words. "So what do you want from me, Shree?"

"Ma'am, I was wondering, if you could try to console her." Shree said slowly.

Sakshi eyes widened. They spoke different emotions, but Shree was a kid. He couldn't read that.

"Ma'am, if you try it would be better. You can handle this situation more nicely. Only you can make her understand. Please ma'am, please." Shree pleaded.

Sakshi held her breath, for a moment. What she wanted to avoid, was what she was being asked to do. She could not explain it to Shree, that she was the worst person to consider for this situation. Only if she could. She let out her breath and walked towards Sania.

Seeing Sakshi approaching, Liza got up and moved up. Sakshi slowly sat down beside Sania. She was thinking what should she say.

Sania looked up to the new figure who had come to console her. She just cried saying, "It was all my fault."

Sakshi looked up to her and asked, calmly, "How?"

Sania was taken aback by that sudden question. She fumbled for words in between her sobs, to explain her point.

Sakshi helped her, "You think Jyoti died because of you? You think she was killed because of you?"

Sania nodded.

"How? Sania, tell me how? How is it your fault that you and Jyoti were friends and she fell for a guy who didn't like her? Betrayed her, cheated her and left her. How is it your fault that he made false promises to her? Showed her dreams that he would never fulfill? Did you know all this will happen? Did you know that he would do something like this?" Sakshi asked.

Sania had quietened to listen to her.

"Did you?" Sakshi asked. Sania moved her head slowly indicating a no.

"Then?"

"But she was killed because Akash wanted me." Sania screamed.

"But Sania, neither did you know that nor did Jyoti."

Sakshi patted her back and made her drink a glass of water. It was not the words that made Sania cool down, but it was the voice. The voice had so much depth, such intensity that Sania could not help but agree.

Sakshi walked away, but suddenly Sania asked a question that sent shivers down her spine.

"Do you think Jyoti can forgive me? She will not be angry or disappointed with me?" She asked.

Sakshi slowly turned and gulped down before answering.

"It was not your fault Sania. She is not angry with you. You are not the one whom she has to forgive. You are not." Sakshi said and turned back quickly and left.

Sania, didn't ask her why would she believe her. She just did.

But there were two pairs of eyes watching this, and they had heard it. Arjun and Rathod were standing far away but witnessing everything. They heard the last sentence what Sakshi said and both thought the same.

"Would Sakshi forgive her also? Would she not held her responsible for the sorrows Sakshi faced?"

Thank you.

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