My Heart Broke

We might not want to agree but there is a little of us in each of them. Seeing Anuj and Kavya shatter made me feel so bad for them. The pain might take a long time to heal but the scars will never go away. Anuj Kapadia and Kavya are those situations which we might have seen or caused but chose to ignore. Kinjal the pain of betrayal never goes away you just learn to live with it. Baa needs a stronger lesson else she will continue to ruin lives like this. Anupamaa when you did not have love you complained now when you have it you cannot cherish it. Is it that you don't know how to love since you haven't lived before or you don't deserve love ?

Shitnupama doesn't deserve anuj or love or respect. She is just doormat serving shah family. That woman is sick. She needs therapy. I hope they brought up this issue where anuj forces anuapama to visit psychiatrist and the doctor helps her identify her Stockholm syndrome and how it has rewired her brain into thinking abusive shahs more than her own blood relatives and now new family.

I think:

The problem started with her staying at Shahs after Divorce. That is the root of her and Kavya's issues. Neither was Anupama able to "move on" nor was Kavya able to "move in" or be accepted.

Everyone conveniently forgave "achche" pita and put the entire blame on Kavya.

Anupama probably wanted assurances in the form of being married and having a family (much contrary to what she kept telling "Aurat ko kisi mard ki zaroorat nahin hoti" etc.). She rushed into marriage to silence her insecurities and the society (which was also a consequence of her staying at Shahs).

The rest as we know is...... Epic🤷🏻‍♀️.

Originally posted by: Bodhianveshika

I think:

The problem started with her staying at Shahs after Divorce. That is the root of her and Kavya's issues. Neither was Anupama able to "move on" nor was Kavya able to "move in" or be accepted.

Everyone conveniently forgave "achche" pita and put the entire blame on Kavya.

Anupama probably wanted assurances in the form of being married and having a family (much contrary to what she kept telling "Aurat ko kisi mard ki zaroorat nahin hoti" etc.). She rushed into marriage to silence her insecurities and the society (which was also a consequence of her staying at Shahs).

The rest as we know is...... Epic🤷🏻‍♀️.

True

That is why after divorce kids leave with their mother to live seperately

leaving father with his new wife

here even good kid samar never said come mom lets leave away from this cheater father and took her and left

any clever son or daughter will take mother and leave when step mom comes to fathers home

have you ever seen children stay with step mother when real mom is alive leaving own mother alone

thats duty of a adult son or daughter to support mother when father betrays

otherwise whats use of family and kids

why anupama never left to her mothers home after divorce and than rent herself a place

everything anuj or malvika should do is it after divorce?

go stay with devika shes also alone after divorce

but no madam wants to stay with ex hubby only

Originally posted by: myviewprem

True

That is why after divorce kids leave with their mother to live seperately

leaving father with his new wife

here even good kid samar never said come mom lets leave away from this cheater father and took her and left

any clever son or daughter will take mother and leave when step mom comes to fathers home

have you ever seen children stay with step mother when real mom is alive leaving own mother alone

thats duty of a adult son or daughter to support mother when father betrays

otherwise whats use of family and kids

why anupama never left to her mothers home after divorce and than rent herself a place

everything anuj or malvika should do is it after divorce?

go stay with devika shes also alone after divorce

but no madam wants to stay with ex hubby only

A step parent needn't be bad. Re-marrying post a divorce comes with the share of adjustments into the existing set-up. They don't need to fill in the shoes of the parent either.

Kavya never demanded to be made into the trios step-mom. She demanded being accepted as Vanraj's wife and the DIL of Shahs. Least of ALL be considered in the decision making of the family.

Paritosh, Kinjal, Samar and Pakhi's resentment to accept her is understandable but that gives them no right to insult, disrespect or taunt her.

They understand dynamics and when they can accept their father, they can accept the one their father married as well. By accept I mean be cordial with Kavya.

ALL I am saying is, Anupama could have lived separately. This would have helped her gain a perspective away from the toxicity and from that mohalla. Away from responsibilities. Learn new things. Give life a chance with an open mind.

Samar/Pakhi staying at Shah House or leaving with mother is a separate thing. They are not kids. They can function by themselves or will learn to. Further, they can always help remotely. They would anyway meet at the Dance Academy.

In an open set-up her decisions would have been more rational. She would have been able to give time to her feelings for Anuj to settle before going ahead with marriage, family, adoption etc.

I hope we can safely say now that a Woman canNot, should Not carry matkas that she cannot manage. This is true for Men and Women alike. You can Not have the cake and eat it too.

Originally posted by: Bodhianveshika

I think:

The problem started with her staying at Shahs after Divorce. That is the root of her and Kavya's issues. Neither was Anupama able to "move on" nor was Kavya able to "move in" or be accepted.

Everyone conveniently forgave "achche" pita and put the entire blame on Kavya.

Anupama probably wanted assurances in the form of being married and having a family (much contrary to what she kept telling "Aurat ko kisi mard ki zaroorat nahin hoti" etc.). She rushed into marriage to silence her insecurities and the society (which was also a consequence of her staying at Shahs).

The rest as we know is...... Epic🤷🏻‍♀️.

Yup. All of the problems being seen in the show now come back to this one decision made by Anupama (or rather the makers). In staying on with the Shahs post divorce Anupama lost her chance to carve out a separate identity for herself. And also snatched away Kavya's chance at settling down in the new atmosphere properly.

All of Vanar's mistakes were swept under the rug by the ever hypocritical Baa and instead it became Anupama v/s Kavya when really both women were starting a new chapter in life and in no way needed to compete with each other.

Par ab woh hota hi hai na. If you build a house near the seashore the tide will come in. It cannot be avoided. Dono ek hi ghar me rahengi toh problem toh hogi. Add to that Baa insulting Kavya all the time and Vanraj being incapable of letting Anupama go. He couldn't treat her right but also cannot bear it when someone else is treating her right. His ego is anyways a mile wide and always gets in the way of him being able to let things go.

Then Anuj happened. I think without the influence of the Shahs, Anupama might have given the relationship more time before jumping into marriage. But again Baa kept prodding her with vile comments and Vanraj and his ego got hurt by the mere mention of Anuj. Living in the same neighborhood made it impossible to not listen to the peanut gallery and Anupama literally had to be pushed into this relationship with Anuj by Samar/Bapuji.

While their intentions might have been fair, probably Anupama was not ready for it and it just shows now in how much she remains silent when it comes to Shahs and is unable to grasp anything Anuj asks of her.

Anupama should have listened to her real mother Kantaben when she asked her daughter to leave Shah house during Toshu/Kinjal marriage itself. But then Anupama was like 'doli me aayi thi arthi pe jaungi and all that. I knew then, this woman was never moving on. Which is really sad for us viewers because that was the story we all wanted to see and came here for.

Originally posted by: HoneyBee7312

I knew then, this woman was never moving on. Which is really sad for us viewers because that was the story we all wanted to see and came here for.

I thought that would be the story too, but now I'm beginning to wonder if the writers' goal is to show how some women still can't move on (easily) despite being given all kinds of opportunities, because it's not only about what happens in your surroundings but also what goes on within you. Anupama has been in a reactive mode for a long time now, responding to meanness or conflicts during and after her divorce, far more than while she was married. She hasn't really taken the time to introspect or proactively make a decision. I still wonder if she would have said yes to Anuj had he not given her an ultimatum. She's always felt overwhelmed by his one-sided love so sometimes she made grand gestures to show she recuperates. Anuj doesn't want all that from her at all.., small but shiny stars is what he's looking for: her love and attention... It's not hard for her to provide those but for that she needs to get rid of the Shah clutter in her head and stop trying to please those ungrateful people.

Originally posted by: inlieu

I thought that would be the story too, but now I'm beginning to wonder if the writers' goal is to show how some women still can't move on (easily) despite being given all kinds of opportunities, because it's not only about what happens in your surroundings but also what goes on within you. Anupama has been in a reactive mode for a long time now, responding to meanness or conflicts during and after her divorce, far more than while she was married. She hasn't really taken the time to introspect or proactively make a decision. I still wonder if she would have said yes to Anuj had he not given her an ultimatum. She's always felt overwhelmed by his one-sided love so sometimes she made grand gestures to show she recuperates. Anuj doesn't want all that from her at all.., small but shiny stars is what he's looking for: her love and attention... It's not hard for her to provide those but for that she needs to get rid of the Shah clutter in her head and stop trying to please those ungrateful people.

Her reaction are not indicative of her understanding. I have a feeling she feels Anuj is angry because she called Leela to Kapadia Mansion or that they fought. Not why the fight happened.