Can anyone bring outsiders to others house? - Page 2

Ok i think i was talking of anupama here

after divorce too she says shah is mayka and goes to shah house daily and interfers in their decision

where as shes just ex wife of vanraj not really daughter of ba a and hasmukh nooo

now my mom bua says my mom is her daughter so my mom cannot go to bua house and act as if shes only daughter no. Same way anupama is daughter like to hasmukh and baa not real daughter shes just ex wife of vanraj now. Jab vanraj ki biwi hai kavya she cannot go and start acting like shes their bahu at home or even daughter etc. If shes daughter of house is vanraj her brother? Woh bas kehne ko kethe hain daughter she does not understand that. Shes right now no one in that house as per law usko koi right nahi hai. Not even a daughters. Daughters have right on parents property aur they have right to visit parents etc as per law. Only her kids stay thee that too grow up male sons only not others.

not all like it

she takes anuj or choti anu or dimple without asking them - toh unko pasand nahi ata hoga

like that i am saying not any other way

Originally posted by: lalaland23

Just imagine, the bahu takes care of her husband's elderly parents, takes them to the doctor, provides for them etc. And the daughter comes on some random day or once in a while and complains about it and disagrees with everything she is doing. Is that okay? Who is the one actually doing the work? Or even generally if she complains about the way the house is being run. If they want to renovate the house, they might ask for the daughter's opinion sure, but priority goes to the son and daughter in law who are actually living with them.

I agree that the concept of daughter going away to sasuraal and never looking back etc. is crap, but that's not what this is about. Suppose the parents only had a daughter, no son, and she gets married, she'll still have the right to decisions in her parent's house provided they want her to make them.

That depends too

Nowadays boys marry like daughters and have seperate homes with wife

Also nowadays parents are mostly self independent finnacially in cities atleast

Hardly any son takes care of parent finnacially nowadays in city

Most sons are abroad and in other cities or even same city another house not with parent

Noawadys daughter and son in laws contribute more like taking care of parent in old age sickness etc

because son is far off or living seperate or they do not want responibility

so this concept that bahu takes care ended with our parent generation mostly in cities atleast

It all depends on what is contribution of son or daughter in parent life and home

Parents spend most money on giving good education on son and they just marry and go far off from parents abroad or other cities to avoid taking care of responsibility

Daughters were not spent that much on education by parents(in 90s and 2000s) but still responsibility of parents comes on them nowadays especially in cities.

Society is changing actually in last 20-30 years

The concept of bahu taking care of hubby parent and house was our parent generation not now (atleast in city)

Even in villages they come to city to work living aged parents behind to fend for self in most part of india now

That's basically what I said in my last line. That also includes sons who live far away and daughters who take care of their parents. Forget taking care, like I said, it's basically about who is involved in their day to day life and actions, and if the parents want them to have a say. Not specifically the son or daughter.

And also, daughters do get married abroad and move away, used to happen even in the previous generation and nowadays, they move for studies and work as well. It's not true that all sons leave their parents and go away, they do stay somewhere in the same city or country and if they move abroad also, which is completely fine, not everyone abandons responsibility entirely. Also you can't generalise, there are still many families in the city where the son stays with the parents because they're strict about the joint family concept and have raised their children that way. And in case parents are independent, which many are, they can decide whether they want their kids to have a say or not. But it's usually the ones who are more hands on involved with them, son or daughter doesn't matter nowadays.

What I gave were examples. But nothing can be generalised. At the end of the day, it's who remains connected with their parents who help take decisions. In this case, Kavya is literally living with them, earning for the family when her husband isn't, is ready to take responsibility and has become sensible, yet Anupama is either called or involves herself in everything. With regard to her kids fine, but even before that, with regard to all the problems happening in Shah House, it was none of her business.

This is keeping aside the fact that it isn't even her actual maayka, lol and it's her sasuraal so she has zero right.

Originally posted by: myviewprem

Ok i think i was talking of anupama here

after divorce too she says shah is mayka and goes to shah house daily and interfers in their decision

where as shes just ex wife of vanraj not really daughter of ba a and hasmukh nooo

now my mom bua says my mom is her daughter so my mom cannot go to bua house and act as if shes only daughter no. Same way anupama is daughter like to hasmukh and baa not real daughter shes just ex wife of vanraj now. Jab vanraj ki biwi hai kavya she cannot go and start acting like shes their bahu at home or even daughter etc. If shes daughter of house is vanraj her brother? Woh bas kehne ko kethe hain daughter she does not understand that. Shes right now no one in that house as per law usko koi right nahi hai. Not even a daughters. Daughters have right on parents property aur they have right to visit parents etc as per law. Only her kids stay thee that too grow up male sons only not others.

not all like it

she takes anuj or choti anu or dimple without asking them - toh unko pasand nahi ata hoga

like that i am saying not any other way

Agree with you 100%. In Anupama's case she's not even the daughter and she's treated worse than a stranger so no idea with what haq she goes there and interferes in everything.

Originally posted by: ChirpyKiya10

Sorry to say but even tagging a bahu as an outsider does not reflect the right mindset. IMO, it's worse than that of paraya dhan.

When it comes to taking care of the house, housekeeping, and elderly parents, bahu has to take ownership but her opinion holds no value. Small or big decisions are taken by nanad ( married one) ...does not make sense.. I suppose.

Would you mind if I ask you that if one decision or opinion is never considered or valued, will that woman be able to become part of that family?

Does any woman like anyone's interference in her home?

It's necessary to draw certain boundaries in every relationship, otherwise, bitterness takes no time to creep into any relationship.

👍🏼

What boundaries anupama has not created in shah .if u talking about toshu samar kinal pakhi adhik though they are shah but samar toshu pakhi are still biological children of anupama and kinjal is still daughter in law of of anupama

If u talk about cooking .cooking karne se koi kisi ke Ghar pe haq nahi jama Leta hai

Hum log koi function rakhti hai to guest bhi aake kitchen mein poori banate hai sabji kaatne mein help karte hai

Maine bhi doosre ke Ghar mein jaakar khana banaya hai bottle mein paani bhar ke rakha hai table saaf Kiya that does not mean main unke Ghar mein haq jama rahi thi

Guest Hone ka Matlab yeh nahi just sit and eat

She is not just a guest. She is the ex bahu of that house, who was abused and harrassed for 26 years and broke out of it. No sane person will go back to that house and cook for them or do their chores. They will keep their distance and limit interaction as much as possible. Not show up there every other day.

Definition of guest

a person who spends some time at another person's home in some social activity, as a visit, dinner, or party.

Some some not every

Some day not every day

Some time not every time

Originally posted by: ChirpyKiya10

Definition of guest

a person who spends some time at another person's home in some social activity, as a visit, dinner, or party.

Some some not every

Some day not every day

Some time not every time

Anupama be like define "some".