Ma jaisi aka Abhir ki mamma vs Abhimanyu ki maa - Page 2

Originally posted by: DevilsHeart

You got me wrong. I was only talking about the financial burden issue. There’s nothing wrong in second marriage or a kid getting love from both fathers. And as a devotee of Kanhaji she could have understood this better!

When parents are unable to move on from past - how can they expect the child to do it? She had a horrible past no doubt but there was good in it too and even after leap she has acknowledged and thanked Abhimanyu for his help multiple times but she forgets all this when she is speaking of Abhimanyu’s presence in Abhir’s life.

I just read a quote somewhere which is apt for most adults in show esp Akshara and Manjiri - “You should heal yourself before you become a parent so that your child doesn’t have to heal from having you as a parent!”

Its high time everyone got a closure on white day before it drains all colors out of the children’s lives!

Well.. Akshara off late has been extremely cordial to both Manjari and her son , but it is Abhimanyu who is still expecting Akshara to apologize to Manjari (that too out of the blue) and still keeps bringing up how he and his mommy lost Neil and his son(as of they didn't mean anything to Akshara). So Abhimanyu and mommy dearest are the ones that truly need to move on.

Originally posted by: Kacchakela21

Well.. Akshara off late has been extremely cordial to both Manjari and her son , but it is Abhimanyu who is still expecting Akshara to apologize to Manjari (that too out of the blue) and still keeps bringing up how he and his mommy lost Neil and his son(as of they didn't mean anything to Akshara). So Abhimanyu and mommy dearest are the ones that truly need to move on.

I think Abhimanyu’s words to Akshara were right today. He just wants both to get along so Abhir doesn’t have any issues. He even answered back Manjiri when she spoke of keeping Akshara away!

He only wants Akshara to acknowledge her pain and act with consideration. But Akshara is keeping her own pain above others - and leaves no opportunity to rile them up by starting blames. In most of her conversations she is the one who raises her voice first. Even in the precap, instead of understanding Abhir and being with him first, she went to blame them - her priority is again not Abhir - but fighting Birlas!

And I disagree that Akshara has been cordial to them all times - it was Abhinav-Abhir who have been cordial and calmed her. Akshara has been using Abhimanyu as a punching bag since leap - goes and vents out all her insecurities on him and blames him to cover her nonsense. She became better with them only after the case started to “play fair” in her own words!

Manjiri is definitely wrong too and worse than Akshara in some ways. But I don’t think Abhimanyu is at fault right now.

Originally posted by: DevilsHeart

You got me wrong. I was only talking about the financial burden issue. There’s nothing wrong in second marriage or a kid getting love from both fathers. And as a devotee of Kanhaji she could have understood this better!

When parents are unable to move on from past - how can they expect the child to do it? She had a horrible past no doubt but there was good in it too and even after leap she has acknowledged and thanked Abhimanyu for his help multiple times but she forgets all this when she is speaking of Abhimanyu’s presence in Abhir’s life.

I just read a quote somewhere which is apt for most adults in show esp Akshara and Manjiri - “You should heal yourself before you become a parent so that your child doesn’t have to heal from having you as a parent!”

Its high time everyone got a closure on white day before it drains all colors out of the children’s lives!

You brought up the bullying as for which Akshara couldn't have prevented Abhir from getting bullied for, to quote the bully, having two fathers— short of not marrying Abhinav.

What she could have done, had she known the situation in Birla House, is give him assurance that changing or not changing his name doesn't change his being or the love his parents have for him. Also, to quote Shakespeare, what's in a name? Why is everyone so triggered by the Sharma surname? Apart from the fact that it's Abhir's birthname and he was raised as Abhinav's son, what does it denote? Changing it to Birla wouldn't change Abhir's upbringing or his love for Abhinav. Alternatively, it won't change the fact that Abhimanyu is his biological father either.

Rather the best dada here says meri geriatric maa ek bacche ke apne parents ke pyaar se insecure kaise nahi hoti when you keep saying Birla nahi Sharma hai??????????

An identity crisis was forced upon six y/o child because a geriatric adult is insecure of a little child's love for his parents.

"Usse jaana hoga ki uske asli pita ka naam Abhinav Sharma nahi *rip a kid's school notebooks* Abhimanyu Birla hai * desecrates notebooks of a six y/o*

*RooAaRrr* But please meri sabse nazuk maa ki parwah na karke tum apne chhote se bacche se kyon milne aayi. *RooooAr*

Abhimanyu absolutely knew till the end that Abhir did not want to live with his biological father and still went ahead with the custody case to gratify himself— to the point that he gloated today about getting Abhir because of his mother. If he couldn't priortise and still cannot priortise Abhir over himself and his mother, why is Akshara being crucified for taking a misstep which, in her mind, would have made it easier for Abhir to accept a new familial set-up?

Anyhow.

Originally posted by: Deltablues

You brought up the bullying as for which Akshara couldn't have prevented Abhir getting bullied for, to quote the bully, having two fathers— short of not marrying Abhinav.

What she could have had she known the situation in Birla House, is gjve him assurance that changing or not changing his name doesn't change his being or the love his parents have for him. Also, to quote Shakespeare, what's in a name? Why is everyone so triggered by the Sharma surname? Apart from the fact that it's Abhir's birthname and he was raised as Abhinav's son, what does it denote? Changing it to Birla wouldn't change Abhir's upbringing or his love for Abhinav. Alternatively it won't change the fact that Abhimanyu is his biological father either.

Rather the best dada here says meri geriatric maa ek bacche ke apne parents ke pyaar se insecure kaise nahi hoti when you keep saying Birla nahi Sharma hai??????????

An identity crisis was forced upon six y/o child because a geriatric adult is insecure of a little child's love for his parents.

"Usse jaana hoga ki uske asli pita ka naam Abhinav Sharma nahi *rip a kid's school notebooks* Abhimanyu Birla hai * desecrates notebooks of a six y/o*

*RooAaRrr* But please meri sabse nazuk maa ki parwah na karke tum apne chhote se bacche se kyon milne aayi. *RooooAr*

Abhimanyu absolutely knew till the end that Abhir did not want to live with his biological father and still went ahead with the custody case to gratify himself— to the point that he gloated today about getting Abhir because of his mother. If he couldn't priortise and still cannot priortise Abhir over himself and his mother, why is Akshara being crucified for taking a misstep which, in her mind, would have made it easier for Abhir to accept a new familial set-up?

Anyhow.

A bully would have found some other thing to mock him if not two fathers. The issue is that Abhir has lost trust in his parents - if that was there he could have shared what’s happening and found a solution! This is as ridiculous as justifying Abhimanyu-Arohi wedding because Roohi was being bullied..

The crisis Abhir is in is more because he cannot speak to anyone now - everyone faces problem in life- a child would share his feelings with a friend or parents - and Abhir is absolutely lost about whom to confide in. At least Abhimanyu apologized after the custody that sorry for not telling you the truth - it doesn’t make up for the damage but its a start.

Regarding Abhimanyu fighting the case - he was cornered - there was no other way to be in his son’s life - he had nothing left to lose - he never thought he would win but he is not someone to give up without a fight and I truly admire this quality in any person.

People see others as they are themselves - Abhimanyu is honest himself and he believed when Akshara informed about marriage - about Abhir being Abhinav’s son. Akshara lies herself all the time so she cannot believe Abhimanyu or Manjiri- it reflects her own intentions.

Also, I myself said Manjiri is worse so I am not going to start analyzing the reasoning behind her actions.

Akshara never kept that Abhi away from his buddhi Manjari maa but this Manjari has no shame in keeping a 6 yrs old kid away from his mother bec she is jealous n insecure.

Originally posted by: DevilsHeart

I think Abhimanyu’s words to Akshara were right today. He just wants both to get along so Abhir doesn’t have any issues. He even answered back Manjiri when she spoke of keeping Akshara away!

He only wants Akshara to acknowledge her pain and act with consideration. But Akshara is keeping her own pain above others - and leaves no opportunity to rile them up by starting blames. In most of her conversations she is the one who raises her voice first. Even in the precap, instead of understanding Abhir and being with him first, she went to blame them - her priority is again not Abhir - but fighting Birlas!

And I disagree that Akshara has been cordial to them all times - it was Abhinav-Abhir who have been cordial and calmed her. Akshara has been using Abhimanyu as a punching bag since leap - goes and vents out all her insecurities on him and blames him to cover her nonsense. She became better with them only after the case started to “play fair” in her own words!

Manjiri is definitely wrong too and worse than Akshara in some ways. But I don’t think Abhimanyu is at fault right now.

@bold why should she do that? She is not their slave or puppet anymore to oblige to their unnecessary demands n tantrums.Did they even care to know if she is alive or dead No naa so why do they expect Akshara to consider their feelings.They can treat her like a baby making machine but Akshara isn't allowed to show her frustrations n emotions.Only his Maa feelings matter as per Abhi.

Originally posted by: zohakhan7

@bold why should she do that? She is not their slave or puppet anymore to oblige to their unnecessary demands n tantrums.Did they even care to know if she is alive or dead No naa so why do they expect Akshara to consider their feelings.They can treat her like a baby making machine but Akshara isn't allowed to show her frustrations n emotions.Only his Maa feelings matter as per Abhi.

Its not about Akshara or Manjiri- its about Abhir!

He spoke with Manjiri too because he wants Akshara-Abhinav in Abhir’s life. And he is asking Akshara to be considerate because Manjiri will also be in Abhir’s life and if they keep this up- Abhir will never have peace or be happy. Abhimanyu even had no issues with Abhir writing Abhinav Sharma in his school books. Its the two women who are both being unforgiving and stubborn towards each other. When Abhinav spoke calmly - Abhimanyu quietly listened. Akshara’s way of talking got him all riled up. Its like she just wants to argue with him all the time rather than discuss or find a solution. If they remained calm - and understood the situation- they could have asked to keep Abhir for the next two days if he couldn’t reach them today! He did bring him on a weekday too to celebrate her results so I believe it could be done!

Originally posted by: DevilsHeart

A bully would have found some other thing to mock him if not two fathers. The issue is that Abhir has lost trust in his parents - if that was there he could have shared what’s happening and found a solution! This is as ridiculous as justifying Abhimanyu-Arohi wedding because Roohi was being bullied..

The crisis Abhir is in is more because he cannot speak to anyone now - everyone faces problem in life- a child would share his feelings with a friend or parents - and Abhir is absolutely lost about whom to confide in. At least Abhimanyu apologized after the custody that sorry for not telling you the truth - it doesn’t make up for the damage but its a start.

Regarding Abhimanyu fighting the case - he was cornered - there was no other way to be in his son’s life - he had nothing left to lose - he never thought he would win but he is not someone to give up without a fight and I truly admire this quality in any person.

People see others as they are themselves - Abhimanyu is honest himself and he believed when Akshara informed about marriage - about Abhir being Abhinav’s son. Akshara lies herself all the time so she cannot believe Abhimanyu or Manjiri- it reflects her own intentions.

Also, I myself said Manjiri is worse so I am not going to start analyzing the reasoning behind her actions.

This is what I was precisely saying that Akshara or Abhinav couldn't stop him from getting bullied but they have taught him to stand up to his bullies. We have seen those instances. However Abhir is getting bullied for having an identity crisis which is thrust upon him by the adults in the Birla house.What more he is being restricted from meeting his parents to assuage Manjari— a geriatric adult's— irrational insecurities. How are Akshara's lies or lack thereof responsible for how is Abhir being treated by the Birlas?

You again centre Abhimanyu's feelings and I am talking about Abhir Even if Akshara had told Abhimanyu the truth in Manali (god knows she tried eben before she was remarried), what exactly would have changed? Nothing.

Abhir would still have continued consider Abhinav his father

And, Manjari still would have been insecure of his love for Akshnav. And Abhimanyu still defend her insane behaviour

Originally posted by: Deltablues

This is what I was precisely saying that Akshara or Abhinav couldn't stop him from getting bullied but they have taught him to stand up to his bullies. We have seen those instances. However Abhir is getting bullied for having an identity crisis which is thrust upon him by the adults in the Birla house.What more he is being restricted from meeting his parents to assuage Manjari— a geriatric adult's— irrational insecurities. How are Akshara's lies or lack thereof responsible for how is Abhir being treated by the Birlas? You gain centre Abhimanyu's feelings and I am talking about Abhir Even if Akshara had told Abhimanyu the truth in Manali (god knows she tried eben before she was remarried), what exactly would have changed? Nothing.

Abhir would still have continued consider Abhinav his father

And, Manjari still would have been insecure of his love for Akshnav.

@bold - Trust! Abhimanyu-Akshara lack trust that the other wouldn’t snatch their right as a parent. This lack of trust started because the truth was hidden, because Akshara studied law only to keep Abhimanyu away, because Abhimanyu fails to find alternatives to what Manjiri suggests. And with every confrontation and this chain of action-reaction between them it is only worsening! It is partly because of family’s interference(the case, restriction order, condition to reveal truth - all were started by others and they reacted to it) but mostly because they cannot have a civilized discussion and keep the past out of it n only focus on the kid. If Akshara revealed it herself - her intentions wouldn’t be doubted by Abhimanyu and he would have been able to answer Manjiri too - but how can he convince her about Akshara when he isn’t convinced himself?

At this point it doesn’t matter who won the custody or who will in future because they have lost Abhir’s trust and broken his heart. Akshara didn’t trust her own upbringing and bond with her son to deal with him wisely.

Also, if she were to tell Abhir when he asked about who his father is rather than wait for court verdict as suggested by BP- they would have had the time to make him deal with the truth together and guide him. And he would be able to trust them to share what’s bothering him. He was made fun of in Kasauli too when both Abhimanyu and Abhinav came for school project. He was upset but he expressed himself at home. He wanted to know who his father was yet he was still emotionally secure. He always accepted both his fathers - but after the financial burden thing - he has lost that confidence to accept both as his fathers publicly. Thats why he faltered while speaking. When he could accept Abhimanyu as a fatherly figure without knowing - him correcting his speech when he mentioned Abhinav - speaks for itself. He wouldn’t care what Birlas think- he stood up to Manjiri for Akshara but he is unable to speak for himself.

Originally posted by: DevilsHeart

I think Abhimanyu’s words to Akshara were right today. He just wants both to get along so Abhir doesn’t have any issues. He even answered back Manjiri when she spoke of keeping Akshara away!

He only wants Akshara to acknowledge her pain and act with consideration. But Akshara is keeping her own pain above others - and leaves no opportunity to rile them up by starting blames. In most of her conversations she is the one who raises her voice first. Even in the precap, instead of understanding Abhir and being with him first, she went to blame them - her priority is again not Abhir - but fighting Birlas!

And I disagree that Akshara has been cordial to them all times - it was Abhinav-Abhir who have been cordial and calmed her. Akshara has been using Abhimanyu as a punching bag since leap - goes and vents out all her insecurities on him and blames him to cover her nonsense. She became better with them only after the case started to “play fair” in her own words!

Manjiri is definitely wrong too and worse than Akshara in some ways. But I don’t think Abhimanyu is at fault right now.

And she has been acknowledging their pain from the moment she accepted the punishment the mother son duo decided for her 6 yrs ago. How much more acknowledgement does he want? She has apologized multiple times in the past and did not utter a word even when Manjari was openly dissing her( as long as it was limited to only her).

And Abhimanyu's demand that Akshara be considerate of his mother's insecurities will result in Abhir feeling more miserable that he already is. How can he put his geriatric mother's baseless insecurities above his own child's well being? That is exactly what Akshara told him today when he questioned her why she was meeting her child frequently even when it upsets his mother. Because she is aware that her child needs her and if Abhimanyu is half as good a father as his fans mke him out to be , he would have looked out for his son too, instead of giving into his grown up mom's unreasonable demands.

It was expected of her to act the way she did with Abhimanyu in the beginning after what he did to her. Did Abhimanyu not blame her again for Ruhi being fatherless (in Kasauli episodes) or get agitated by the idea of her returning to Udaipur? But with time she has been able to put those disagreements behind her. Has Manjari extended the same courtesy to Akshara?

In yesterday's precap, she was the one who understood how miserable and isolated her child was, when she visited him in his school. Now that Abhir is living with the Birlas, isn't it Abhimanyu's responsibility to find out what is it, that is bothering his kid so much? In today's episode's closing shot , Abhir looked extremely sad because of not being able to meet his parents, while Manjari had already dozed off. And in yesterday's episode, instead of finding out if Abhir was actually in the wrong, Abhimanyu asked him to apologize anyway. The kid seems to be losing his spark with each passing day and these two adults who supposedly care so much about him are just lost in their own bubble.