Please help me understand Abhimanyu!

I completely see and understand Akshara’s point of view! I would feel the same if I’m in her position! People who lead a life of guilt spiral down that rabbit hole every single time things go horribly wrong! They live in this constant guilt and don’t exactly understand what they are feeling is out of the ordinary.

I have a problem understanding where Abhimanyu is coming from. I understand that he has been very outspoken about his love and has taken stand everytime. But what I don’t understand is his need for Akshara to put him first. Why will Akshara put him first to his sister, when he was going to be her brother in law and equations have completely changed? Why will Akshara put him first when Kairav her brother is being shook by his collar when he was trying to explain his point on his relation to Anisha? Why will Akshara put him first when her family is constantly stressed to the point of taking drastic decisions?

She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she didn’t back out or falter after confession even after facing accusations in her home and the society! She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she came to the police station to get him released at any cost!

He is asking who he hurt?

He hurt Arohi leaving her at the alter!

He hurt Kairav by taking advantage of the lenience he received from him and that family!

He hurt the elders by constantly pestering them when all he had to do was give them some time and have patience!

I’m having a really hard time understanding him!

Bcz he loved her unconditionally and expects the same from her.

He can leave his family in the blink of an eye and expects the same from her, he is wrong here will he leave his mom for akshu?? Maybe then he will understand it.

But yes he find it insulting that she always puts their love at stake for her family. ok maybe don't prioritise your love over family but atleast don't disrespect that bcz of my love my family suffers..Thatsl family who didn't protect her from her sisters hate, didn't try to make her sister see sense, the brother who asked her to leave them so the other sister could be happy, the family who once didnt asked about her feelings regarding Abhi.

Sorry to say, but sacrificing and disrespecting your love for such family is a sham.

He never said make me your #1 priority. All he is asking is she include him in #FAMILY. Her ( choice of ) words to him were so hurtful even though she didn’t mean it that way. But if you dissect just her words she separated Abhi from those she considers her “apne”.

She could have invited Abhi to her family celebrations knowing he is a Shiv Bhakt. Is she not at all curious how he celebrates Shivratri in his house since he is such a Bhakt? - any GF will have that natural curiosity, but Akshu showed zero interest.

Yesterday she was so happy he saved her BP and they did ghoomer in the ward and he was so happy just joining in even though man hi man he might have wondered why they break into song and dance like this. So her not including / inviting him to shivratri celebrations is like 👎🏼.

There is family and there is love. Family always comes before love , in most of the cases ..its a personal preference . But what I don't understand about akshu is her changing stance at the first problem she faces. During confession she only said that they will fight together and make the families accept their love.

Threatening to die, threatening to suicide is the ultimate form of emotional blackmail . Aaru got hurt , she rejected abhi, bade papa got a heart attack, she rejects abhi. Why couldn't she think of these possibilities before confessing ? All these complication r bec of her , not abhimanyu .if she spoke the truth on Tilak day, aaru abhi angle wouldn't have happened and bade papa wouldn't hate abhimanyu this much . Aaru would not get a chance n build hopes of a life with abhi. Does she even realize this or just acts without thinking ?

If she values family so much , damn don't fall in love with a guy bec he would expect equal status as the family. I say the same for the boy who puts his family above his wife . Don't get married and ruin a girl's life if you're unable to give her the same position as your family .

If two people are in love , and they are committed, decision of break up or whatever must be mutual ... Akshu can't decide everything on her own . Bhai behen poore khiske hue hain. Go threaten a suicide like anisha, bade papa will agree. 👎🏼 kabhi Haan kanhi na is annoying .

Heart attack is caused due to stress that leads to increase in blood pressure. Bade papa was already a BP patient and with akshara running away with abhimanyu,his BP problems increased as aarohi pointed out to akshara bade papa is not taking medicines from me, i had to force him. Then when business deal got cancelled( due to harsh) we saw him having pain in left hand. Again, pain happened in birla house which abhimanyu noticed. Being such a mature doctor, he understood the consequences and owing to that he shouldn't have created ruckus outside goenka house as he knows he's already having pain... It can lead to a heart attack..when it actually happened it didn't even take one second for him to realize that jiska darr tha wahi hua.. so if darr tha, why did you cause stress? On the day that he created scene outside goenka's bade papa didn't take medicines and said isse accha toh mera marr jana behtar tha and actually that almost happened... In such a situation , akshara would obviously live with life long guilt that she lost her grandparent who gave her love, upbringing , everything after her parents left and she had to lose him because of a guy she started dating 1 month ago ...

And what about abhimanyu agreeing to get married and making akshara the one and only true love his permanent saali because maa fell ill? He feared maa ki health will go worse so let's get married and took such a hurtful decision towards akshara because he was majboor...it was an insult to the unconditional love he claimed , that oh akshara you rejected him , i will get married to your sister itself ... He was majboor at that time according to him..so isn't akshara in the same situation? She is in a much worse situation. Bade papa could DIE . If abhimanyu can think of maa ki happiness n health and hurt akshara by getting married to Aarohi, why can't akshara think of bade papa's happiness and health and share her guilt with abhimanyu that because of this love bade papa could have gone?

I think akshara was right in rejecting a guy like abhimanyu, he is way too impulsive... As you rightly pointed out on your post, adding to it his claims that I didn't believe in love, you made me fall in love, it's like he is blaming her that because of you I am involved in all this. A lot of people who didn't believe in love, fall in love but that doesn't mean they blame their partner for anything that goes in the relationship. Akshara never asked or forced abhimanyu to fall in love with her whereas abhimanyu did the same.

I think more than Akshara's actions, Abhimanyu's idea of love is hurting him . It is slowly sinking in him that he has been crazily obsessed to get Akshara as he thought when he finally gets her she too will love him with the same intensity( as he understood in the trip she loves family a lot., So she will love me also like that and so i want that kind of love) but now when he is understanding that the chase was probably not worth it as ak will never love him as much as her family ( till now that's what he is understanding) he is getting hurt. Then his obsession with mahadev, he is expecting akshara to become Parvati? 😆 nowadays relationships don't work that way. Akshara is going at her pace in the relationship and even people who are madly in love want some space when they face difficult situations in life. Akshara just went through a very difficult situation but she confided in abhimanyu and shared it with him...his idea of unconditional love that leave the palace, comforts and come to me is weird...

I've always said since the beginning that abhimanyu's flaws are he is too self righteous ( he thought leaving aarohi at the mandap was her fault, he didn't wrong her, it's not a big deal and family getting humilated is also not a big deal) , his dominating nature ( he didn't consult akshara once before asking her to join again as music therapist , took the decision on behalf of herself even tho he knows bade papa can refuse) , his desire to be no 1 in Akshara's life( in future too there will be lots of issue when akshara chooses goenkas or birla over abhimanyu) , his possessiveness (can't even see his partner talking to someone else) . He loves akshara because she is not involved in any competitive race like his family members but the day she takes some decisions for herself he will have an issue with that too. He wants her all for himself..

But there are many good traits too in him. I liked the fact that he accepted Akshara's family and he actually started crying after coming from OT that he saved bade papa, then took proper care of him in hospital leaving his ego behind of being insulted..he is kind and caring... Good doctor .. handsome...he respects manjari and akshara which is a good part and takes stand for them.. he is just way too emotional that is creating all this problems and it's already very toxic whatever he has done till date...i am sure in future too he will be like that and probably more...

BUT i would have understood his point of view , had he been married to akshara...after marriage partner does expects you to prioritise you and even after marriage if akshara did too much family family, then Abhimanyu would be right in questioning her that why family always comes first to you, not your husband as married life is entirely different..

Also did you notice, kairav Anisha akshara abhimanyu all 4 were involved in this mess that Manish stress increased. Even Anisha took up the blame and said it to manjari kahi yeh humare wajah se toh nai hua hai.. kairav akshara already super guilty. It's only abhimanyu who didn't take up any guilt for causing this stress... And it's not because he saved him.. i want to know what would his reaction if he wasn't able to save bade papa...would he still not feel guilty...i guess probably not... As he is against akshara for saying that "aaj agar aapko kuch hota toh mai khudko maaf nai kar pati"

Originally posted by: daffodil153

I completely see and understand Akshara’s point of view! I would feel the same if I’m in her position! People who lead a life of guilt spiral down that rabbit hole every single time things go horribly wrong! They live in this constant guilt and don’t exactly understand what they are feeling is out of the ordinary.

I have a problem understanding where Abhimanyu is coming from. I understand that he has been very outspoken about his love and has taken stand everytime. But what I don’t understand is his need for Akshara to put him first. Why will Akshara put him first to his sister, when he was going to be her brother in law and equations have completely changed? Why will Akshara put him first when Kairav her brother is being shook by his collar when he was trying to explain his point on his relation to Anisha? Why will Akshara put him first when her family is constantly stressed to the point of taking drastic decisions?

She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she didn’t back out or falter after confession even after facing accusations in her home and the society! She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she came to the police station to get him released at any cost!

He is asking who he hurt?

He hurt Arohi leaving her at the alter!

He hurt Kairav by taking advantage of the lenience he received from him and that family!

He hurt the elders by constantly pestering them when all he had to do was give them some time and have patience!

I’m having a really hard time understanding him!

Watch that again you will get the answer.

Whatever points you said- abhi hurting arohi, kairav and xyz is what you (and others) feel akshu is seeing. clearly she didnt think about these and chose the dude anyways. kairav himself isnt bothered, manish wont be too going by spoilers😆

Originally posted by: daffodil153

I completely see and understand Akshara’s point of view! I would feel the same if I’m in her position! People who lead a life of guilt spiral down that rabbit hole every single time things go horribly wrong! They live in this constant guilt and don’t exactly understand what they are feeling is out of the ordinary.

I have a problem understanding where Abhimanyu is coming from. I understand that he has been very outspoken about his love and has taken stand everytime. But what I don’t understand is his need for Akshara to put him first. Why will Akshara put him first to his sister, when he was going to be her brother in law and equations have completely changed? Why will Akshara put him first when Kairav her brother is being shook by his collar when he was trying to explain his point on his relation to Anisha? Why will Akshara put him first when her family is constantly stressed to the point of taking drastic decisions?

She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she didn’t back out or falter after confession even after facing accusations in her home and the society! She did take a stand for him and that’s the reason she came to the police station to get him released at any cost!

He is asking who he hurt?

He hurt Arohi leaving her at the alter!

He hurt Kairav by taking advantage of the lenience he received from him and that family!

He hurt the elders by constantly pestering them when all he had to do was give them some time and have patience!

I’m having a really hard time understanding him!

👏👏👏

Also I don't understand how can he say, he takes her side everytime and Akshu never does the same? First of all, they have hardly been together for couple of weeks. And during that time Abhimanyu hasn't really given any importance to akshu's family. Continuously since the aborted wedding and confession he has been pushing and pushing and not giving either Akshu or her family any space, to calm down, to try to understand her and Abhi, for time to do it's healing bit. But he says main tumhari family ko apnaya? Second, there haven't actually been so many situations and occasions where they have been called upon to take the other's side.

They have just freshly fallen in love, just now confessed their feelings for each other..there's a long way to go, so much to build. If this is how Abhi is going to be don't think there'll be any chance of them doing any of it.

Originally posted by: borntorule12

Heart attack is caused due to stress that leads to increase in blood pressure. Bade papa was already a BP patient and with akshara running away with abhimanyu,his BP problems increased as aarohi pointed out to akshara bade papa is not taking medicines from me, i had to force him. Then when business deal got cancelled( due to harsh) we saw him having pain in left hand. Again, pain happened in birla house which abhimanyu noticed. Being such a mature doctor, he understood the consequences and owing to that he shouldn't have created ruckus outside goenka house as he knows he's already having pain... It can lead to a heart attack..when it actually happened it didn't even take one second for him to realize that jiska darr tha wahi hua.. so if darr tha, why did you cause stress? On the day that he created scene outside goenka's bade papa didn't take medicines and said isse accha toh mera marr jana behtar tha and actually that almost happened... In such a situation , akshara would obviously live with life long guilt that she lost her grandparent who gave her love, upbringing , everything after her parents left and she had to lose him because of a guy she started dating 1 month ago ...

And what about abhimanyu agreeing to get married and making akshara the one and only true love his permanent saali because maa fell ill? He feared maa ki health will go worse so let's get married and took such a hurtful decision towards akshara because he was majboor...it was an insult to the unconditional love he claimed , that oh akshara you rejected him , i will get married to your sister itself ... He was majboor at that time according to him..so isn't akshara in the same situation? She is in a much worse situation. Bade papa could DIE . If abhimanyu can think of maa ki happiness n health and hurt akshara by getting married to Aarohi, why can't akshara think of bade papa's happiness and health and share her guilt with abhimanyu that because of this love bade papa could have gone?

I think akshara was right in rejecting a guy like abhimanyu, he is way too impulsive... As you rightly pointed out on your post, adding to it his claims that I didn't believe in love, you made me fall in love, it's like he is blaming her that because of you I am involved in all this. A lot of people who didn't believe in love, fall in love but that doesn't mean they blame their partner for anything that goes in the relationship. Akshara never asked or forced abhimanyu to fall in love with her whereas abhimanyu did the same.

I think more than Akshara's actions, Abhimanyu's idea of love is hurting him . It is slowly sinking in him that he has been crazily obsessed to get Akshara as he thought when he finally gets her she too will love him with the same intensity( as he understood in the trip she loves family a lot., So she will love me also like that and so i want that kind of love) but now when he is understanding that the chase was probably not worth it as ak will never love him as much as her family ( till now that's what he is understanding) he is getting hurt. Then his obsession with mahadev, he is expecting akshara to become Parvati? 😆 nowadays relationships don't work that way. Akshara is going at her pace in the relationship and even people who are madly in love want some space when they face difficult situations in life. Akshara just went through a very difficult situation but she confided in abhimanyu and shared it with him...his idea of unconditional love that leave the palace, comforts and come to me is weird...

I've always said since the beginning that abhimanyu's flaws are he is too self righteous ( he thought leaving aarohi at the mandap was her fault, he didn't wrong her, it's not a big deal and family getting humilated is also not a big deal) , his dominating nature ( he didn't consult akshara once before asking her to join again as music therapist , took the decision on behalf of herself even tho he knows bade papa can refuse) , his desire to be no 1 in Akshara's life( in future too there will be lots of issue when akshara chooses goenkas or birla over abhimanyu) , his possessiveness (can't even see his partner talking to someone else) . He loves akshara because she is not involved in any competitive race like his family members but the day she takes some decisions for herself he will have an issue with that too. He wants her all for himself..

But there are many good traits too in him. I liked the fact that he accepted Akshara's family and he actually started crying after coming from OT that he saved bade papa, then took proper care of him in hospital leaving his ego behind of being insulted..he is kind and caring... Good doctor .. handsome...he respects manjari and akshara which is a good part and takes stand for them.. he is just way too emotional that is creating all this problems and it's already very toxic whatever he has done till date...i am sure in future too he will be like that and probably more...

BUT i would have understood his point of view , had he been married to akshara...after marriage partner does expects you to prioritise you and even after marriage if akshara did too much family family, then Abhimanyu would be right in questioning her that why family always comes first to you, not your husband as married life is entirely different..

Also did you notice, kairav Anisha akshara abhimanyu all 4 were involved in this mess that Manish stress increased. Even Anisha took up the blame and said it to manjari kahi yeh humare wajah se toh nai hua hai.. kairav akshara already super guilty. It's only abhimanyu who didn't take up any guilt for causing this stress... And it's not because he saved him.. i want to know what would his reaction if he wasn't able to save bade papa...would he still not feel guilty...i guess probably not... As he is against akshara for saying that "aaj agar aapko kuch hota toh mai khudko maaf nai kar pati"

Perfect and super comprehensive analysis of what's wrong with abhi-akshu relationship. Your so right that Abhimanyu is such a self-righteous person. It's impossible to be happy in any kind of relationship with such type of people. I've noticed this absence of any guilt for any mistake he makes from the very first. After the fiasco of the first tilak, his mother was suffering so much that she made a mistake in not identifying the correct girl. Swarna too was getting blamed, both families were in such embarrassment, Akshu was in painful dilemma. Amidst all this, never once did Abhimanyu accept that it was also his mistake in not saying the name of the girl to his mother, and instead talking in roundabout way. He didn't even bother to comfort his mother who he loves so much when she was beating herself up for spoiling everything by saying it's not your fault, it's mine.

Originally posted by: austen-eliot

Perfect and super comprehensive analysis of what's wrong with abhi-akshu relationship. Your so right that Abhimanyu is such a self-righteous person. It's impossible to be happy in any kind of relationship with such type of people. I've noticed this absence of any guilt for any mistake he makes from the very first. After the fiasco of the first tilak, his mother was suffering so much that she made a mistake in not identifying the correct girl. Swarna too was getting blamed, both families were in such embarrassment, Akshu was in painful dilemma. Amidst all this, never once did Abhimanyu accept that it was also his mistake in not saying the name of the girl to his mother, and instead talking in roundabout way. He didn't even bother to comfort his mother who he loves so much when she was beating herself up for spoiling everything by saying it's not your fault, it's mine.

Yeah and now as per BTS he is ready to leave behind his family who gave him everything for akshara. His dad loves him , no matter what his issues with him are this will hurt him to the core that son will forever seperate from him. Leave his dad, he is ready to leave behind Neil too who did everything for him. He just wants manjari and akshara..

And you can get on me when there would be a manjari vs akshara ,he will choose manjari...in future he is going to blame akshara for her ill health ..

But now when akshara is in same shoes he can't accept. He is a typical Indian men with high level of hypocrisy who blames the wife for everything...basically abhimanyu wanted a housewife who will do pati pati... Now he is not getting that and in future too he will fight...

He wants Akshara to make him his #1.. or even at the same level of family ... But doesn't understand that it will happen but it does take time and patience to love someone you know 1 month ago at the same level at which you love your family since childhood... His love is not unconditional but it is conditional with a lot of expectations.

You r absolutely correct....all this happened after Tilak fiasco...i think if Akshara made her family understand why she kept quite on tilak day then things would have been clear

From the tilak day Goenkas are against Abhimanyu..Also choosing Arohi for Mother was a wrong move by Abhimanyu....