My take on Angry Raman (30th sept) - Page 3

Originally posted by: sobha

For me what's wrong is wrong its not about fav...
This she time she was nit wrong...
True assumption of editing is wrong even...
What's the prove

True...it's not actually about favs. I told it, cos it is like this most of the times here.
I adore female characters always, I agree. But, TBH, I just hate Ishita's illogical concerns for everyone (even her ill-wishers are also in that gang), though this time her concern did seem to have a lil bit logic. The same goes with Raman. His jerk behavior...I hated and will hate it always.

It was harsh but in real life this kinda words are spoken often, i have seen around me, husband threatening wife but no one actually means that. even in love marriage it does happen. Wife also some times threats that i will leave home but never leaves.

ishita din meddle she just informed raman. raman had to face insult of ishra relations and his character from his ex wife and ashok so was out burst . It s NORMAL and REAL life situation even in all kind of relationship,father also threats daughter or son. do they mean really ?

good valid points ..nice post

I am a silent reader most of d times..but cud not stop myself from writing my POV on dis discussion.
This is neither to justify nor to find fault with Raman or ishita's actions/reactions in ystrdys episode.
I dnt knw hw many of d members/fans here r married. Bt for those who r married, I am sure they will knw dat married life is not a bed of roses always. Just bcoz u r married n extremely luv each other, does nt mean dat ur opinions, ur priorities, ur likngs etc wil match everytime. In real married life, a lot of situations arise were the partners wil hav clear cut difference of opinion n they may argue to the extent dat it turns into an ugly fight. In the process they may unintentionally utter words dat hurts each other badly. But dat doesn't mean dat you should straightaway leave ur partner. It is at this point dat whatever moments of luv n care u hav shared with ur partner comes to the fore. When u r hurt you wil definitely also remember d gud things ur spouse had done for u and in d process u wil accustom urself to forget d bad thing dat happened. I am saying dis bcoz I myself can exemplify for dis. I am married since last 4yrs n in dese 4yrs me n my husband faced d most depressing situations of life together. During all d situations I must admit our opinions were different n we even argued badly with each other. I also admit another thing dat, we both have hurt each other terribly with our unintentionally uttered words, dat we broke down uncontrollably. But even after so much arguments n hurting, we pick up ourselves n continue to be together n support each other.
Nw many can question me dat, so is married life an adjustment. N my answer for dat is a plain yes. Bcoz no matter hw much anyone says dat successful married life is based only on luv, respect n trust, it is big truth dat u wil hav to make a lot of big n small compromises in reality to end up in a successfull marriage. It is in such cases, where either of the spouses or both find it difficult to adjust or compromise or rather forgive, dey end up in divorce.and I hav seen a lot of youngsters get demand for divorce just bcoz they could not tolerate a rude word from their partner. And if everyone follws this trend, den I wud say no married couple wil exist.
Having said this, in ystrdys YHM episode, at first Ishita was right in informing Raman of wat she heard from Ashok. Again Raman took d right decision by trying to make Shagun understand d situation. But at last tables turned n both Raman n Ishita were insulted. Nw d point is wen Ishita herself saw wat Raman did to solve d matter n hw dey got insulted, y was she again discussing d topic, wen she very well knws dat hw frustrated Raman wud be at dat point of time. Raman got terribly angerd n he shouted.
I saw many saying y was she silent. But was she really silent? Did nobody see dat she was also fighting back to him? Nw dat wat I say reality is all about. Both were right in their respective positions, but one of them hav to calm down for d time being as the argument wil not head anywhere. So ishita chose to end the argument.
thanks for bearing my essay

Originally posted by: mreshma

I am a silent reader most of d times..but cud not stop myself from writing my POV on dis discussion.
This is neither to justify nor to find fault with Raman or ishita's actions/reactions in ystrdys episode.
I dnt knw hw many of d members/fans here r married. Bt for those who r married, I am sure they will knw dat married life is not a bed of roses always. Just bcoz u r married n extremely luv each other, does nt mean dat ur opinions, ur priorities, ur likngs etc wil match everytime. In real married life, a lot of situations arise were the partners wil hav clear cut difference of opinion n they may argue to the extent dat it turns into an ugly fight. In the process they may unintentionally utter words dat hurts each other badly. But dat doesn't mean dat you should straightaway leave ur partner. It is at this point dat whatever moments of luv n care u hav shared with ur partner comes to the fore. When u r hurt you wil definitely also remember d gud things ur spouse had done for u and in d process u wil accustom urself to forget d bad thing dat happened. I am saying dis bcoz I myself can exemplify for dis. I am married since last 4yrs n in dese 4yrs me n my husband faced d most depressing situations of life together. During all d situations I must admit our opinions were different n we even argued badly with each other. I also admit another thing dat, we both have hurt each other terribly with our unintentionally uttered words, dat we broke down uncontrollably. But even after so much arguments n hurting, we pick up ourselves n continue to be together n support each other.
Nw many can question me dat, so is married life an adjustment. N my answer for dat is a plain yes. Bcoz no matter hw much anyone says dat successful married life is based only on luv, respect n trust, it is big truth dat u wil hav to make a lot of big n small compromises in reality to end up in a successfull marriage. It is in such cases, where either of the spouses or both find it difficult to adjust or compromise or rather forgive, dey end up in divorce.and I hav seen a lot of youngsters get demand for divorce just bcoz they could not tolerate a rude word from their partner. And if everyone follws this trend, den I wud say no married couple wil exist.
Having said this, in ystrdys YHM episode, at first Ishita was right in informing Raman of wat she heard from Ashok. Again Raman took d right decision by trying to make Shagun understand d situation. But at last tables turned n both Raman n Ishita were insulted. Nw d point is wen Ishita herself saw wat Raman did to solve d matter n hw dey got insulted, y was she again discussing d topic, wen she very well knws dat hw frustrated Raman wud be at dat point of time. Raman got terribly angerd n he shouted.
I saw many saying y was she silent. But was she really silent? Did nobody see dat she was also fighting back to him? Nw dat wat I say reality is all about. Both were right in their respective positions, but one of them hav to calm down for d time being as the argument wil not head anywhere. So ishita chose to end the argument.
thanks for bearing my essay

Well said. much needed post. When both stared shouting that house wouldnt bea house at all rather it would be hell.

First of all, thank you to everyone who shared their thoughts on my topic.

A) Putting my post back in context

So. I've read most of the comments but it seems that half of you went on the assumption that I was trying to justify Raman's RUDENESS towards Ishita. While I can see why it is how you interpreted my post, I'd like to focus back on what I was saying.

My post was a response to THESE TWO PRECISE QUESTIONS AND NOTHING ELSE :

- why is Raman angry at Ishita for meddling since HE DECIDED to go and help Shagun?
- why is Raman angry at Ishita for the insult SHAGUN threw at him?

When I watched the episode, I was shocked at Raman for shouting at ishita.
The question in my mind was : Why is he suddenly ANGRY at ISHITA since HE DECIDED HIMSELF to help SHAGUN ?
When I was watching the scene, I thought it was unfair for Ishita to be shout at since she wasn't wrong : she just shared an information about ashok/shagun with Raman (SCENE ONE) and things went the way they went (SCENE TWO) so I didn't understand why Raman was angry at ishita now (SCENE THREE).

I may be wrong but it seems that at least half of you guys just read the two last questions and assumed things out of my post. Or maybe I just didn't express my thoughts well enough, and you thought I was trying to justify Raman RUDENESS, when in fact my post was about Raman's ANGER.

NB : I hope you don't think that I'm trying to play with the words. I'm very attached to the meaning of words and I'm trying to put discussion back in context.

My take on his anger (and that's the WHOLE point of my post) is that he got angry at her not because of his humiliation by shagun (which would have been unfair and unjustified and wrong), but because she (ishita) kept buggering him about the matter.
To explain my take, I was ASSUMING in my post that we missed a part of the discussion that led to his anger(SCENE TWO AND A HALF : this is a fictional scene that I thought might have happened) . Cv's created a gap : instead of explaining Raman's outburst, they straight up showed him shouting at Ishita without explanation.

Was he rude? Yes.
Do I condone it? No.
Am I trying to justify it ? No.

I can't stress this enough. This post is not about his RUDENESS or the HARSH WORDS he said to her. It's about his ANGER.

B) Now, to respond in detail to the comments :

THERE IS NO EDITED SCENE

People have been saying we shouldn't assume things out of "unseen scene" I don't see why not and I don't think I'm wrong in doing that at all. So far we have all assumed things about Raman and Ishita's past even though we didn't see 99% of it. We deeply discuss what goes through characters' mind and heart based on assumptions too. Limiting our discussions to the ONSCREEN content is a form of censure and I'm not about that. I hope you respect my opinion.

Also, I'm not obsessed with Raman or trying to justify him on top of my life to the point where i invented a scene. I didn't mean that there was an edited scene that we didn't see. I meant that there is gap in the script. CVs didn't show what lead to Raman being angry to the point of throwing things around, and that's not good.

RAMAN WAS WRONG TO SHOUT

Shouting is a bad habit and I personally can endure taunts to an extent you wouldn't believe but being shouted at is not something I can take. That's my personal preference and I'm sure people are different.

As I said, I do think that shouting is bad. But once again, it was NOT what I was trying to figure out. Raman is someone who shouts when he is angry. Some people are like that and we can't change them. And we certainly can't change the show and this shouting scene in it. That's why I wasn't even questioning if he was right in shouting at ishita. My question was : did raman shout at ishita out of context. And for that, I had to figure out the context : which is why I assumed there was a scene two and a half.

RAMAN BEING RAMAN IS NOT A VALID ARGUMENT

People kept saying that I or more generally people in the forum were trying to justify Raman's behavior by saying "he's just like that". You also said that "he should know the limit".

First of all I wished you didn't brought that up in my topic, because at no point I said "Raman is just being Raman." or anything in that line.
Secondly, people discuss their fav character the way they want.
Thirdly, Raman's character was NOT the point of my discussion, please do find the right topic to discuss it.

ISHITA WASN'T WRONG

In talking the matter with her husband, now she wasn't.

In keeping talking about it when Raman was angry and after he ALREADY did what he can help, yes she was.

I do NOT believe Raman came back home and started shouting at her. There is no chance that this is how it happened. If ishita had said "well, let's forget it all, Shagun's problems are her own". Raman would have agreed and the discussion would have stopped here. That's why I strongly believe she trying to talk him in going to shagun again, which he didn't like.

RAMAN IS EVERYONE'S FAV - THAT'S WHY THEY DEFEND HIM

I don't have a fav, I don't like Ishita more than Raman nor do I like Raman more than Ishita.

It happens that I was not defending his behavior or character or shouting but the fact that he was angry. And I stand by it, his anger was not out of context. It's not about favoritism.

Note : i don't mean that anger is the best solution to IshRa problem. I can't re-do the scene, anger was in the scene, and i'm discussion anger.

RAMAN ANGER = ISHITA JAGA JASSOS-ERY

People have been saying if we forgive raman's anger, then we should forgive ishita's meddling manners. I've also read : if raman has a flaw, then ishita has too.

Again I don't see why Ishita is dragged into this particular topic but since you've been so many to talk about it, I guess I should address it.

Anger is a an emotion, and more to that : it's an uncontrollable emotion. It's spontaneous, and unless you take anger management classes, you can't do much about it.

Anger : you feel it, you express it.
Meddling : you plan it, you do it.
See the difference?

Comparing Ishita and Raman is wrong because comparing human beings is wrong.
Comparing the emotion of anger to the habit of meddling, is stupid.

RAMAN VS ISHITA REACTIONS

People have been saying that Raman shouldn't behave that way because Ishita didn't behave like that when he did previous mistakes. I'll say to that : people are different and we shouldn't compare them. The way they show their love to each other, their pain, their anger and disagreement is DIFFERENT, so yes they acted differently.

Also their reactions are different because they have different tolerance to various things. Ishita as the female lead is shown as more understanding and less prone to anger.

I could write an essay on this but I'll just say it one last time : comparison is not the solution.

RAMAN TOLD HER TO GET OUT OF HIS LIFE

Yep he did, and yes that was wrong but it was part of the anger, he didn't mean it. And if any of you guys have had a relationship, you'll know that couples do say that to each other. Yes it hurts but it's not the end of the world. And if this show wants to be realistic, then they have to show realistic fights. When you're angry with someone you say stuff that will hurt them; it's called quarrelling for a reason.

Anyway, I'm not saying that it's okay for him to say what he said because of anger, I'm saying it's okay for him to be angry and when you're angry, you say stuff, bad stuff. Hope y'all see the difference.

MEAN RAMAN POOR ISHITA

People are saying that Raman is only mean to Ishita as if she is his own personal punching ball:

he stopped talking to his father, he beat up Romi, and Mihir, he threatened to beat up Simmi, and he often shouts at his own mother. Do I need to say more?

C) To respond to my own question at the end of my post :

Did raman shout at her out of context ? As I said, at first I thought he was taking out his anger on her from Shagun's drama, but he wasn't. He was angry at ISHITA indeed for still wanting to meddle after what happened.

After I read for the third time all of your comments, it seems that you really thought my post was about raman's harsh words and his shouting, when it was not. I wished Raman didn't shout in that scene but seethed in anger just so you guys wouldn't have had the opportunity to go on a tangent about shouting...

As a final note : In that precise scene, I believe Raman wasn't wrong in being angry. I also believe anger doesn't solve problems and Raman should learn to be calmer. But anger is his flaw and for now, he can't do much about it.

Originally posted by: berrysweet

Scene 2 and half is an assumption to excuse Raman. Raman has so far shown his anger and uttered rude comments at every oppurtunity.

When he is angry --- he shouts. When he is happy ,he taunts. When she tries talking to him on any serious matter, his first response is to again make fun of situation.

Not acceptable. Am wondering why she takes it. Is it because she is tooo grateful for her marriage and Ruhi?

You guys are frying your brains over that? I think the reason Raman is always Sadu is coz he is sexually frustrated. Poor guy was sooo romantic with Shagun now he has an iceblock as a wife who keeps saying "chee" and runs off at the thought of any physical proximity.

He saw Ashok with laddu...aka...girls in both hands and got damned jealous and pissed at Ishita for being so cold so he took it out on her. Now a man with an ego the size of an elephant cant see he is jealous of Ashok😉.

No action in bedroom and no sign of any in future, heck even his parents and inlaws probably have more romantic moments than him and his iceblock wife.

Dont know why this is shown as such a big deal on these soaps. Some PPl are worried that if they confess or consummate they will get all mushy. Sorry to burst your bubble, but that has nothing to do with everyday fights. Married ppl have worse fights than Ishra. If sleeping together meant no fights than all married ppl would live happily ever after😛