PART 13
Chakor paced left and right in her bedroom. She had so many questions in mind but hesitant to ask clarification from Suraj. How if he knows that I am doubting him? Will he think I am insecure about him? Should I just leave it as it is? Her mind was playing games with her. Chakor is not the type of a person who can keep her uncertainties to herself. She will feel restless till the matter is resolved and that's what she was feeling right now.
Suraj was tremendously drained after his weekend outing with RV and his buddies. He was drunk the night before and couldn't grasp what really happened. Due to that, he was having severe headache but his pain seems to be reduced after he hugged Chakor. These two months Chakor has been his strength and also his weakness. He found happiness in being with her almost 24 hours a day. She has been a good listener and a wise advisor. She gets moody every now and then and Suraj finds it to be very cute. The fights they have made him realize how fragile she really his and he pledged not to hurt her even by mistake. Once he got home after the weekend outing, he wanted to talk to her but he was upset that Chakor looked uninterested. It's okay, she's just moody; tomorrow I will hug her again and tell her how miserable I was without her these two days. He could only think of ways to get his wife's attention. She has consumed his mind and soul. With that thought, he got out of the shower and walked towards the closet with his towel clad on the lower part of his body.
As he was choosing a comfy shorts to wear, he heard someone knocking his bedroom door. It must be Chakor. My 'jungli billi' has a change of mind, I guess. He was delighted to have a glimpse of his wife before the night ends. He rushed to open the door and grinned when he saw Chakor standing there, biting her right index finger nail. Chakor has the habit of biting her finger nails when she is anxious or in confusion and Suraj adored her innocence and cuteness. Chakor was too lost in her thoughts till she didn't realize that Suraj has opened the door. She clutched her left palm and threw it across the door to knock again but it hit Suraj on the face. "Ohww, Chakor!" he scuffed, holding his jaw. "You can never stop being a jungli billi', can you?" he kidded, knowing that she did it unintentionally. "Sorry, Suraj, I didn't mean to..." before she could finish her sentence, Suraj's almost stark-naked body caught her attention. His wet messy hair, muscular torso, and a white towel wrapping around his hip covering his thigh made her gulp a few times. Her reaction was noticed by Suraj and he extended his hand towards Chakor's chin and lifted her face up to meet his eyes. "My eyes are up here, baby. You look lost," he smirked, well aware of what Chakor's eyes were focusing on. "I think you should get dressed first. I will talk to you later," Chakor murmured and turned around to walk away.
Just as she stepped further, Suraj took hold of her right arm and pulled her into his room and shut the door. "What brought you here, baby? Your mood is good now?" he looked cockily into her eyes, holding both her hands tight. Chakor had so many questions but words seemed to be stuck in her throat. "Suraj... Can you please wear something first?" she mumbled; his bare skin touching her is the last thing she wanted to feel tonight. She wanted her questions to be answered first. "Why? My presence is intimidating you?" he bent a little and whispered close to her ears. Her eyes were shut and she turned around, showing her back to Suraj. "I will not talk or look at you till you change. So, better do it quick. I am sleepy," she responded looking at the closed door. Suraj smirked at his mischievous wife, stepped towards his closet to get what he needed and wore it.
"Okay, done. You can turn and look at me now, baby," he drew her closer to him, and placed one hand on her hair and the other on her hip. "Suraj, where is your shirt? You sleep without your shirt? Don't you have some decency? I told you to get dressed up," Chakor yelled. "Ufff!! 'Jungli billi', why do you scream always? I do sleep without my shirt. I have been sleeping like this since forever. I can't change it now, you see. But don't worry, I will not seduce you okay," he mocked just to see her jerk. "So, why are you here, baby? Anything you want to tell me, before we get to bed? Need a hug?" he was optimistic; he wanted to hear her say that she missed him too. He craved to be in her arms. Instead of what he hoped for, he got something unexpected from her.
Chakor : I met Tina today.
Suraj : Tina? Your friend from University? (He asked, his hand still browsing her hair and hip)
She wondered how he can remember Tina so easily after all these years.
Chakor : That was fast! I mean you didn't even take time to think. (She looked at him, being judgmental)
Suraj : (A short smile escaped his lips) My dear envious wife, that was fast because she was always with you during your trainings. She used to gaze at me whenever I was in the field.
Chakor : Envious?! Excuse me! I just asked questions, no envy here whatsoever. Get it, pakhandi'? (She pointed her right index finger at him which he tried to bite right before she pulled it away)
Suraj : Okay okay, chill. What about Tina now? I thought you're going to tell me something important. You just had to spoil the fun by talking about others, am I right? (He tighten his grasp, brushed his forehead with hers)
Chakor : (Distanced her forehead away from Suraj) This is important, Suraj. She told me everything, I mean, everything about what you did in the University... (she paused to look into his eyes)...for me.
Suraj : (He gulped, his heart started pounding fast) For you? What do you mean?
Chakor : (His tenseness made her feel better; that indicated her that Tina was right) About being my saviour... Your affection towards me... You care about me, don't you, Suraj? You care about me more than you portray yourself to be, am I right? The 'angry hateful' Suraj was just a mask, wasn't it?
She placed her left palm on his right cheek, and planted a soft kiss on his chin slightly brushing his lower lips, making him shudder. His eyes flickered. Chakor kissing him willingly was the last thing he ever thought would happen. The last kiss they shared was on the kitchen counter two months back when they vowed to give this marriage a chance. Her move moved him deeply. He wanted to open up to her; he wanted to tell her how he is feeling right now about her presence in his life; he wanted to plant thousands of kisses on her; he wanted to make her his forever. He was glad that his secret is finally out, thanks to Tina. He tilted his head slightly and smiled at Chakor.
Suraj : I do, Chakor... I care about you more than words could say...You have no idea how much your presence means to me... (He placed his both hands on her cheeks, scrubbed his nose with hers)... I want you in my life, Chakor...
Chakor : (She relished the warmth of his nose against hers) Then why didn't you tell me about this, Suraj? Why I have to hear this from a third person? Don't you think I deserve to know? (She whispered in a voice that could melt any man)
Suraj : Actions speak louder than words, Chakor. Haven't I prove you that in these two months? You have given me a newfound strength. Seeing you makes a day brighter. Didn't my smile and hug make you feel that? (It was his turn to plant a soft kiss and he chose her forehead as she beamed)... We still have plenty of time, if you are still uncertain...
He didn't want to force her to make any decisions now. After all, she is his woman. He is willing to give her as much time as possible. He finds joy in waiting for her to reciprocate his feelings. It was painful yet sweet. It was nerve-racking yet peaceful. He couldn't stop gazing profoundly into her beautiful eyes but those eyes reflected uncertainty. He could sense tranquility with a mixture of ambiguity.
Suraj : Is that all for now or something else is bothering my precious wife? (He pinched her cheeks his warm fingers)
Chakor let out a sharp moan and frowned. She thought, I do have something in mind. Your care for me is fine but how many girlfriends have you had?
"W...what? I'm not telling you," Suraj's voice drifted up to her. She looked up at him and wondered what was he talking about?
"What are you talking about?" she countered, puzzled. "You just asked me how many...girlfriends I've had?" he raised his eyebrows diffidently.
OH MY GOD! Did I say that out loud? I can't believe I did that. But then, curiosity took over her senses, and she asked out loud purposely this time, "So... Suraj, how many have you had?" she shrunk the size of her eyes and gave him a stern look.
"Like I said, I'm not telling you," he replied. As she looked at him, she noticed his cheeks had turned pink slightly. A smile erupted on her lips. "Why not? I just want to know how many? Or have you lost count?" Chakor placed her fingers on his chest, moving them in a way that make his whole body tremor. She was doing it purposely. She knew Suraj would tremble under her touch. All she wanted was an answer and she would do what is necessary to get the information.
With surprise and amusement, his cheeks darken with blush. He paused for a few seconds, pleased by Chakor's tantrums. And then, "Fine! But before that, promise me you wouldn't be upset. Promise me that you will not stop talking to me. You can scold me and be angry at me but you wouldn't stop talking to me, promise me that," he extended his right palm, seeking her agreement. Chakor looked at him in horror. Why is he asking me to promise even before he tells me the truth? Was he that bad? Was he really a Casanova as Tina said? Has he been sleeping around with many woman? Chakor hesitantly positioned her right palm onto his, promising him. She wanted answers; she didn't want to have such doubts in her for lifelong.
Kissing her palm, Suraj moved his hands to her neckline. He edged his way closer to her while Chakor's hands automatically placed on his muscular chest. "Chakor, whatever I tell you now happened in the past. That Suraj Rajvanshi is gone. HE is no more. I don't want you to hate me for who I was in the past. If you really want to know it, then let it be," he moved his hands away from her neck and held her hands. Chakor could feel her heart pounding so wild.
"Well, here goes nothing. Chakor... I had a few girlfriends when we were in the University. Most of them were Pa's business partners' daughters. I wasn't really serious with them. It was just a few dates and parties...and...some night outs," he guzzled and then continued, his eyes still glued to Chakor's. "I used to get drunk with them and party for one whole night and after a few months... I'll get some new ones," he dropped his head as he was feeling bad for what he has done. "Get new ones? Get what?" Chakor hummed, her hands still on his chest. "I mean... What I meant was... there will be someone else after that... A new girlfriend"
Chakor's mouth dropped open. "What?! You were changing girlfriends as if you were changing your clothes, Suraj?!" she paused. And then, "All you did was party all night long and jump from one damsel in distress' to another as if women are like mobile phones that you can change once the new model comes?!" she stated, as realization dawned on her face along with a little worry for her own self. I never knew this side of you, Suraj Rajvanshi, her mind spoke.
"So, am I like one of those women to you now, Suraj? You'll be with me for the next 4 months and then leave once you get tired of me?! That's your plan, isn't it?!" Chakor bellowed, her voice was submerged in fury. Whether it was in the past or present, thinking Suraj with other women incensed her.
Suraj looked at Chakor in dismay. "NO, Chakor. You shouldn't even be comparing yourself to them. You are nothing like them, Chakor. Why are you linking my past to my present life with you? I told you, THAT Suraj Rajvanshi is no more. That Suraj Rajvanshi died the moment he left the university! Those girlfriends were just to pass the weekends during university days, it meant nothing, Chakor," he exclaimed incredulously.
"Seriously, Suraj?! You spent your nights with multiple women and then claim they meant nothing?! Are you listening to what you're saying right now?!" Chakor scoffed, pushing him away. Paused for a few seconds, she looked at him, "Wait... Was it for sex? It was for sex, wasn't it? You used them to get laid and then threw them away, that's what you did, didn't you?" she spurted.
Suraj seemed to be choking on air after each of her questions. "For God's sake, Chakor, no!" he stammered. He was full out distraught now. "How can you think so low about me, Chakor? They were just my girlfriends, not my bed mates. We partied, spent some time together, nothing else happened!" he reassured her, getting hold of her arms, right above her elbows. This time, Chakor pushed him further away with much force than before.
"You could never stop using women, could you, Suraj?! First the girls you dated during university, then Imli and now me! What are you expecting from me?! Get laid like the rest of them?!" her eyes watered of their own accord. Suraj looked at Chakor in disbelief; he didn't expect her to react this way. Why does she think that I slept with all of them? He was lost in the pain he witnessed in her eyes. "Chakor, why are you joining matters which are not connected at all? Those women are not you. I didn't cross any physical boundaries with them and I will not cross any with any other women. I didn't choose to be with you to leave you once we make love... You...You have to believe me, baby..." his voice spluttered, almost pleading.
Chakor jeered. "Believe you?! How can I possibly do that when all your life you have been using woman for your advantage, Suraj? You're still going to defend yourself that nothing happened between you and those women? You got drunk, partied all night, spent the night together, but nothing happened?! Really?!" Chakor's doubts felt like thousands of spikes jabbing his bare skin. His headache worsened. This was not how he wanted this night to end. He wanted Chakor to embrace him; he thought she would be missing him but he was wrong. She doesn't believe me. She doesn't have any feelings for me. She thinks I am a playboy. She thinks I sleep around with women for fun. Why Chakor, why? Can't you see the changes in me in these two months? Can't you see that you're my happy place now?
His eyes turned crimson and her words poked his skull. She looked livid and he wanted her to calm down. Chakor could only do that when she takes some time out away from Suraj.
Realizing that, he walked towards his bedroom door and opened it, Chakor still looking at him for answers. He turned to face her, "Look Chakor, if you don't believe me, I don't think you should be standing here any longer. I was wrong for partying hard during my university days but I am not a bad person. Those girlfriends that I had, they were not with me out of love; we were all equally rich and it was just like social gatherings that rich people go through in their lives. Yes, I am wrong for being who I was by staying up all night partying, getting drunk and all but that doesn't make me a freakin' womanizer, Chakor. If I want to get laid, I would have done it and I don't need anybody's permission for it!" he stopped abruptly, seizing Chakor by her midriff and pinned her against the door. Chakor was all ears as he looked passionate rather than enraged.
"If sex is my only intention, why would I want to give this marriage a chance when I can get any woman I want, Chakor?! This Rajvanshi name is enough to get me all the attention I need but I choose YOU over anything and anybody else. I don't need the next four months to decide whether we should stay married or get separated because I know what I want this very moment!" his voice was firm as his topless torso heated up due to this argument.
"I want you, Chakor; I chose you; you're all I need; you're the only woman I'll ever make love to. If you can't see the truth in my eyes, if you have any doubts about my honesty and my loyalty, there is no point in continuing with this probation period anymore," he groaned, a tear rolled down his left cheek. "Now, please leave. I know you need time to think about all these and reflect on yourself, so go," he let go of his grip and pointed Chakor the exit.
Her eyes welled up, guilt consumed her consciousness. She had no words to say, worried that anything she say might make the situation worst. Suraj was broken; he was sulking and knowing that Chakor doesn't trust him made his world fall apart. She made shallow steps towards the exit and Suraj swung the door forward, closing it.
Chakor sat on her bed, Suraj's words echoed in her brain. Past few months Suraj has been the best person in my life. He was never once angry for whatever tantrums I put forward to him. He took good care of me when I was sick two weeks ago. He makes me smile. He respects and honours me. He still maintains his distance from me as I told him to remain as my friend. How could I doubt a guy like that just because Tina told me that he partied hard during university? Did I exaggerated the whole situation because of my jealousy? The thoughts about imagining him with other women overshadowed Chakor's judgment during their quarrel. Deep in her heart, Chakor knew that Suraj was right. He was never a womanizer and he will never be one.
The night which was supposed to end with two souls telling each other how much they missed one another turned out to be a night full of qualms and remorse.
Suraj's mind voice: Will she ever see the truth in my eyes?
Chakor's mind voice: Will he forgive me for what I have said?
*****END OF PART 13*****
Part 14 UPDATED ON PAGE 33 😊
Edited by malarmia - 7 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Taarak Mehta Ka Ooltah Chashmah
Tum Se Tum Tak
