Aani 😭 You sure do know how to make one cry. This piece literally did tear me up.
You picked to explore the heart of a lady whose always only hidden her real self, her real feelings within her and put on a facade for the world. Someone whose the most insecure, frightful and vulnerable. It's hard to imagine what a person like her would go through at such a time.
She had never hoped to marry, never hoped to find a companion who would walk her through life being by her side, let alone have a kid. But she fell in love with a child, then because of her got a companion and fell in love. She was burdened with a tag of being 'baanj' but her daughter and then her husband her, ensured her she wasn't what the world accused her of and she healed. ONLY for a time to come when she lost her child her Ruhi, the one who happened to absolve her every pain and given her the life she had never dreamt of. And losing her ruined it all. She was questioned, accused and blamed, told she wasn't fit to be a mother and pushed away. For her to come back to this life again would be the scariest thing to do. She had learnt to live with the truth of her life once, and now once again after losing her entire world...but another hit she won't endure.
You so wonderfully depicted her ordeal on seeing Raman, her delusion about him being happy breaking and realization hitting that Raman wasn't anything she hoped he would be, for which she is staying away from him. She thinks her creating a distance from him, letting them believe she died would keep them happy, keep them safe. But its like seeing the worst kind of hell to see Raman in the dark hole she pulled him out from earlier. This time he's fallen in deeper and for the worst.
It must be the worst sort of trauma to be in, to face the love of her life whom she'd want to run back to and still can never do that for so many reasons. Maybe because she thinks it would ruin her family's happiness, because she believes in what he thinks of her, scared of facing the same accusation and so much more.
I don't think a better job could have been done of depicting her emotions, her inner turmoil. It's made me cry and that proves your job was well done 😳
Edited by -Anku- - 8 years ago
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