She lay flawlessly wrapped around in his arms sleeping soundly, making mayank wonder if she had ever slept this peacefully ever since she had come back. She looked so beautiful with the moonlight just barely touching her skin, her lips closed tightly but those eyes softly closed and dwelling in deep slumber, it was like a painted picture and he could see all the details for himself and he loved seeing her so calm and peaceful.
Closing his eyes, he mentally thanked dadi for sending them on this trip because in alot of ways it helped them move forward, back home they seemed to be stuck in one place like some cycle; no matter what way they went, in the end they came out with the same results, but here he got to see so many things differently. He got to see her in a different light and now that he thought about it, he wanted to see more and more of her like this - in his arms close to him.
After a lot of tossing and turning in bed, mayank gave up and headed downstairs to the kitchen, brushing his hand through his ruffled hair. He helped himself to some coffee and sat down on the stools near the counter. He wondered what made him so eager and restless when he had everything.
''coffee, at 5 in the morning is that the new trend?'' breathing in some courage she walked over and poured herself some also and joined him. Mayank silently observed her moves, ofcourse he had come downstairs to clear his own thoughts about where they were going. His and Nupurs relation, he didn't expect it to take a drastic turn as this.
''yes, i called the guiness people and they said they might even give me a spot in their book'' amusement was the only way he could get rid of his thoughts and not explode of on nupur.
''did i interupt something?''
''not really, just a man having coffee!''
''are you sure, you seem confused and your eyes are so intense, i have feeling you were thinking''
a glint arose in his eyes and he looked towards nupur'' about ??''
she walked around the counter and smiled, '' hmm i don't know, maybe how we are moving too fast and you don't think this relationship could work''
''i didn't say that''
''but you were thinking it'? weren't you'' at the thought of being caught of his horrendous thoughts mayank braced himself for the worst, '' well all i can say is, if you really don't trust us, me and you than i can't do anything it''
''its not about the trust nupur''
''than what is it about?''
Mayank closed his eyes and breathed in a sigh, '' its about us and our friendship and our relations, what if we don't work out''
''well for one thing for us to actually work, you would have to give it chance, but i doubt your ready for that''
''Nupur'--''
''What mayank, i'm just saying the truth, and careful sharma you broke my heart once, if you even think about doing it again, i don't know what step i might take''
mayank stood up and gripped her wrist, '' didn't i make it clear, i want you, and only you''
Nupur looked into his eyes and split into laughter that was filled with sarcasm, '' oh, so you want me, but you just can't love me! right?''
''why are you twisting my words''
''i'm not twisting your words mayank, i'm only try to live in the reality!'' when she winced, he let her go afraid he might have hurt her in his fustration, '' mayank i know you love her''
mayank cut her before she could speak, '' i do love her and i don't think i will ever stop'' he confessed taking a seat and trying to keep himself calm and composed, '' but the only difference is that even though i love her i don't want her''
''so the one you want you can't love and the one you love you don't want?'' biting her lip nupur walked forward, ''so are you trying to tell me, you will never love me?'' she just had to ask, all this waiting and for what? to find out he could never love her like he loved piya. She needed to know so she could get use to the idea and to avoid having her heart break over and over again.
mayank framed his eyes on her delicate face which defintely looked surreal when woken up in the morning, rather she looked mussed and he liked her like this alot. Nupur had never given him the chance to see her vunerable and he knew why know, but if he had ever known about her heartbreak or her pain, he wasn't afraid to say, he would have chosen her over anyone and everything.
''i think i just got my answer'' buzzing out of his thoughts mayank held on to her before she could make an escape and turn this little fight into some dramatic thing again but he so loved that about her, her childish nature yet with the hint of maturity, it defined nupur all the way, '' i think you should hear my answer before you go'' he sounded sincere when he gestured her to sit through his eyes and she did just that following his command without a quesiton.
''why should i hear you out'?'' her tone indicated annoyance but her face was sober and soft.
''because you want to?''
''and how do you know that??'' he waited a beat to see her eyes mold into his own and smiled.
''your eyes say everything , i just wish you could for once read mines'' placing his hand on hers, he gestured and placed the other hand under her chin softly turning her to face him when she looked away, '' look into my eyes and tell me what do you see??''
Nupur was contemplating running away right this second because she was afraid for the first time in her life, because she knew one look in those eyes and her built up world would tumble and crash but she wasn't a coward and would never consider herself one because everything she had done in her life was for mayank and she would continue to do what she could to make him happy. It was never that she wanted him to be happy rather she would do everything she could to keep that smile on his face but all along she had forgotten about her. The her which desired and wanted so many things from him but she couldn't be selfish when it came to him so she gave until it was too much to bear. Theres always a line that one should never cross, but she even crossed that when she asked rather begged piya to accept him, maybe it was her love for him or the fact the she would rather have her own heart break into pieces than to see him crushed. But today it was different, she worried for herself and that bandaged heart of hers afraid if it were were to break again, there would be nothing in this world, that could or would repair it.
''look into my eyes nupur'' she gave up and hunched her shoulders when her eyes met his and then there was no turning back. She felt embarrassed or rather stupid when she saw something she had been ignoring all throughtout afraid if she built expectations again she would only be dissappointed, '' what do you see?'' he asked very casually still holding on to her hand and his eyes dwelled into hers. it was time she understood he had moved on and the love he held for piya was part of him but not the whole part and others could exist within him.
''i see me'' still in her little bubble nupur clung to his hand tightly afraid it might be some dream and it would be only a fraction of time until she woke up from it.
''do you know what i see whenever i look into your eyes nupur'' pausing he held her face softly in his hands and came closer, 'i always saw me, and i saw that no one has or will ever love me like you do and that scared me alot because you at one time were mine all mine and i never realized or cared about this love back then but now its all so different. Its scary but its beautiful, i'm was scared that i'll never be able to love you like you love me and it made me scared because how can i not love a person who was like a god sent angel in my life...how do i hold back when you are pouring out everything you got for me? But i think that night when you asked me to stay a part of me wanted to stay also and give you half of what you have given me and its not pity. its my feelings, i think i'm starting to have real and strong feelings for you and it makes me vunerable...a feeling i truly despise. After piya i promised myself that i would never have such strong feelings again but i can't help it...'' when his face collapsed on her shoulder and nuzzled in her hair, than only nupur shut her eyes feeling tears seeping through but she held them back and hugged mayank wrapping her arms around him feeling warm and precious.
''i'm sorry --'' mayank pulled back and smiled,
''don't be sorry, i think you coming back into my life has to be the best thing that has happened and i know its stupid to say this now, but i waited for you, i knew you would come back one day. I just had this feeling that i could feel you even though you were so far away from me'' mayank rubbed his hand over her tears and smothered them with a smile, '' i will love you one day like you love me, it may not be strong as yours but my love will be enough to keep you happy, something i desired for the day i came to knew how much you suffered because of me''
''when you love someone suffering becomes transparent, its the smiles and joys that count mostly''
''well i hope to bring many joys into your life than'' looking back at him nupur fidgeted around on the stool and got up holding his hand, walking to the couch she fell on it dragging mayank with her, '' you already have mayank and loads of them, that its make me feel as i'm living in some dream from which i will be woken up from any moment''
mayank grinned and slid his around her waist pinching her, '' Ouch, mayank what the hell was that for??''
''to show you your not dreaming and this is all real'' he smiled and held onto her tightly when she rested her head on his chest and snaked her arm around his clinging to it tightly, '' its all reall isn't'''
''it can get anymore real than this nupur'' nupur closed her feeling sleep hover over her eye lids, and fell a sleep in a moment. This was the second time mayank stayed awake watching her sleep soundly beside him, and he had to say it felt amazing. He never knew she could drive all these feelings within him but no matter what, he knew he was falling for her by the moments.
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''only a sharma is stupid enough to book a table outside the restaurant without checking the weather first'' nupur whined dressed stunningly in maroon colored churidaar with her luscious long burgandy brown hair left open for the wind to flow through them. And nothing but a pair of pearl earrings to add to her elegance.
''don't forget --''
''yes i know i'm a sharma also but i don't count myself in the stupid category!''
'well maybe you should, because i remember it was you who wanted to eat outside'' nupur knew he was right about that, she had been the one to persist on eating outside when mayank would have rather ate inside the restaurant. But she straightened and smiled, she couldn't let him win so she looked away.
''i'm going to change'' mayank held onto her wrist to stop her
''why are you changing'?''
''well because i'm not going out for dinner''
Mayank thought for a while about her words and than looked at her with a grin playing in his eyes and lips, '' what if i cook dinner and we eat out in the balcony?''
Nupur stayed put in her spot and looking at him and think about a lot of things, '' mayank i'm not sure i want to eat food cooked by you last time i did, i have a stomach ache. So, No'' ofcourse she was only playing around with him but she didn't expect him to take it all so seriously. It only took a moment for those soft eyes to become stormy, ''mayank i --''
''forget it, there are leftovers in the fridge help yourself to those'' with a nudge on the shoulder, he was out of her way in a nick of time.
Nupur shook her head and smiled, sharma men and their anger, she knew too well to be suprised or to be hurt. So walking to the kitchen she decided it was time she did something for him.
When he walked into the kitchen, he saw her busy with a apron wrapped around her waist and wooden spoon in her hand trying to taste something. By the look of it he guessed it was fine because after tasting nupur made no notion to add something else to make it better. She looked so cute lost in her own little world for the moment not worrying about anything else. Her hair so casually tied up but a few strands were loose and dangling around her face disturbing her and now that he looked closely, there was flour smeared on her left cheek also but she wasn't aware due to her focus on her goal of completing the meal.
He was very much admiring the veiw from where he stood but it didn't last to long because she turned around and caught him standing near the refridgerator grinning like a fool, '' so i see someone is in a better mood''
mayank stayed queit and walked up to the stove when she ran behind him warning him to stay away until she was done, but she saw him touch the flour and turn around. With a aloof smile he smeard it on her right cheek, '' now the whole look is complete''
Nupur raised her eye brow and twitched in her spot, only when she looked into the mirror she realized what mayank had been talking about, '' and i see you humor is back also''
'' it comes and goes --'' he opened the lid of one of the pans but nupur shut it, '' not till i'm done. Now OUT'' she didn't demand, she stated and he knew it would be wise to step out rather to go later with a foul mood.
Mayank had the table already cleaned and lit up with a pair of candles while the rain bounced off the umberella that sheilded them from the rain drops, but nonetheless it was a beautiful sight, a sight he knew he would share with nupur and no else from now on. That feeling gave him some satisfaction, she was all his for now and for every tommorrow.
''Mayank the table looks amazing'' ofcourse suprised by the soft and luminous atmosphere nupur stepped out to the balcony and placed the food on the table, ''i didn't know you were a softie''
''appearently i didn't know that either'' pulling out the chair for nupur, he smiled watching her take a seat. ''so what are we having tonight chef?''
chuckling, nupur lifted the lid off the tray and mayank grinned, ''chinese?'' he looked up at her, '''i didn't know you could cook ...''
''well i have my moments now and then'' shrugging off the compliments, nupur poured out food for herself and mayank.
''so what others moments, do i need to know about'' mayank asked intrigued.
''nothing major, my moments come and go. so you'll learn about them eventually'' placing a fork filled with food in her mouth, she put her chin in her hands and smiled at him, '' what?'' she asked when he starred back at her.
''nothing, you look --''
checking her face for flour or any other ingredients, she looked at mayank, '' do i have something on my face''
''no, i was just say that you look very beautiful. And your eyes --''
''what about my eyes'?''
''i feel like drowing in them, and your lips --''
blushing, nupur looked down and played around with her spoon not looking at mayank,'' and what about my lips?'' she asked very hesitantly afriad of what he might say.
Mayank didn't know what it was?, maybe it was the rain but he really wanted to hold her in his arms and kiss her, but when he saw the flicker of nervousness in her eyes, he also came to another realization.
''have you been kissed before?'' he knew he had asked the wrong question when nupurs spoon clattered on the china platter spreading silence everywhere.
''i feel sleepy'' ignoring the question, nupur stretched her arms and pretended to yawn, hoping to get herself out of this mess. She knew she was inexpirienced but she wouldn't let him know it. The fact was nupur had never let herself be touched by someone other than mayank, because she knew she was meant to be his and his only and if for some reason someone did come into her life someone other than mayank than the person would only be a subsitute for mayank because she couldn't truly belong to anyone else other than mayank.
getting up Nupur tried to rush inside, but mayank blocked her path, '' you didn't answer my question''
''what question'''nupur asked turning away from him and trying to change the subject, '' mayank let me go inside i'm freezing''
Mayank smiled and wrapped his arms around her making her feel warm, '' i hope your not cold now?'' pausing he lifted her chin so she would look at him, but she was far too stubborn.
''mayank, let me go. i want to sleep'' she stole a glance at him and than looked down again, feeling queit nervous and restless in his hold, but it was something she had gotten used to over the past week, the being in his arms, or the sweet gestures he would spring on her from time to time, it all made her feel loved.
When he said nothing back, Nupur inclined her head and starred into his eyes, inches apart her breathing quickened and her pulse paced. Mayank smiled to himself seeing her blushing and nervous, a combo he so loved seeing on her.
He closed the distances between them in no time, her eyes shut swiftly and she stopped breathing. Ofcourse her eyes flicked open slowly when she felt his warm lips on her cold cheek, lingering there for a while, he pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly.
He ofcourse had wanted to kiss her right there, but he could wait, because she was worth the wait. Every moment he had spent with her over the course of their time here had been worth the wait. He would never forget the moments he shared with her because they gave him something new, something he had been depriving himself of,
feelings for nupurs that were so familar but so vastly different from what he had felt for piya.
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Sorryy for the long. My MS Word was not opening for some reason.😕 Anyway I hope you like the update as its my last update till june. I'm so sorry but i can't find time to write updates now a days, but surely i'll be back in around mid june. Until than, i hope this update keeps you satisfied.
I will miss you all, and i hope to be back soon.
Sajjal.
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