TBP OS - Starting Anew | Update Pg. 10

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chetna

@crazysky

Rocker

+ 6

Posted: 13 years ago

#91

this was really awesome
i liked how u worked on samar's dialog
i love him speaking his royal urdu version

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muzzy_sk

@muzzy_sk

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 13 years ago

#92

Here we are! :D
well sidhe sidhe bolu toh ws a bit disheartend to read at first that der no kiSha n Kiya-RV thngie here..but wen we read ur update it ws really gudd!! :)
wat i lovd d most is Piddi-KD-Bobby thingie!!..i love PIDDI :D.. Loved that part..secndly i kinda like anya gujral bt thn sumthng or the othr ws bothring me there..i dun noe wat..pata nhi..i loved Samar-RV part..its so cute to see nonu fi8 fr his moti!!..:D..
On the whole its ws a great update..worth waitng for..:) update soon,vl be waiting :)
p.s: thnx fr d scrap :D :P

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Kankshita

@thegameison

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 13 years ago

#93

I is here. Finally. Pardon me for the delay.

Now then, you have the audacity to ask me my age? Take it. I am fifteen.

Dear lady, you have one very crisp command over both English language and storytelling. There are hardly any FFs in IF that give you quality English and such pitch-perfect Hindi dialogues that suit the characters you've incorporated in your writing.

Your skill at imagination and weaving one plot into another and another is commendable! I liked the beginning of chapter one so much, sister bonding after eons, it was a marvelous way to begin.

Samar-Ranveer one-on-one in chapter two is excellently penned and so is the KD-Piddi-Bobby part. You have had a strong grip on your characters all along which is why there are these tidbits from their consciences in between the paragraphs, they really beautify it all. (:

A very versatile writer there, you are!

Waiting for more.

Thanks for the PMs!

-Kankshita

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517072

Suspended

Posted: 13 years ago

#94

Loved it!! I hope KiSha meet soon!!😉

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Shishir Darsh

@marauder

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#95

*Edited*

Well, finally read the update. 😊 . From yesterday only my system was creating problem and I was not able to access internet. But now finally all is well. 😃

Coming to the update. Loved how you started the update with completely different plot with Piddi-KD-Bobby. It was short but nicely done but left us wanting to know more. Hopefully we have lot more to read about trio in next update. And yeah it was good to see Bobby is interested in something other than football too.

Now coming to the next part. It was a sheer delight for me as fan of Samar to read it. You were so right about him being the soul of the next update. Whether his amazement on herding abilities of girls or his outburst on Ranveer, everything was masterly done. And it was really pleasing to see his dialogues in such an awesome urdu. But even though I am fan of his urdu accent but it was his english monologue that was the highlight of this episode. And about Ranveer I would only say he is in big trouble. Waiting for his face off with Anya.

Now coming to the restroom talk of girls. It was nicely done. But Anya as a character suddenly started to look more like Swayam than Anya we were introduced to first update. As you said she suddenly started to act more like a hermit than the elder sister of Kiya. It may be because rapport of Anya and Panchi was not established like Kiya and Anya. But that flaw apart it was interesting part.

Over all an awesome chapter which creates a nice platform for upcoming parts :)

Edited by marauder - 13 years ago

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Priyanka

@CoffeeAddict

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#96

Originally posted by: xKishaxForevahx
It was very nice. I like the idea of the gang hanging out together. ^_^

Update soon and DO NOT forget to pm me!
I'll be waiting! ^_^

Thanks. Will PM you, don't worry.

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Priyanka

@CoffeeAddict

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#97

Originally posted by: FeistySoul
Thank you mohtharma for this update😆
But hey being late is nothing new to me, mere har ek ff ko mein two-three months gap mein update karthi hun...
I always wonder why my readers haven't left😆
Ah! Hum tho mohabbat kar bete hain, Samar Pratap Singh se☺️
I just luurrvved his Urdu bhashan and yeah Mais is right, he aint gonna speak so much English in the show😆
Anya Gujral is being the good sister now, hope she remains so.
I am waiting to see her depiction in the show...
Panchi's fuse is blown I guess...
Ranveer bachu thu tho gaya kaam se...
Where did that KD-Bobby-Piddi part take place and what exactly did KD see in the Ipad...
Anyways sawaalon ke jawaab ke liye hum intezaar karenge mohtharma matlab ki agle update ke liye...
Jaldhi ki jiye!
Yeh tho beshak entertaining tha👏

That English dialogue was the only one where he would even in my story. That was out of character moment for him too as he lost his cool.

Anya in my story is the good sister. I dunno what the CVs have in store.

I find it that like everyone needs a lesson regarding love, life... RV needs one regarding being humble and kind. He'll get that from Panchi and Anya, in his own rude language.

KD-Bobby-Panchi happen in the same mall. Now what he saw, that you'll see in the next update.

Thanks.

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Priyanka

@CoffeeAddict

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#98

Originally posted by: Analeez11
Hey! You updated. I don't mind when you update as long as you don't abandon the story. Loved KD-Piddi convo. The dialogues were so perfect i could actually imagine them. Loved the lecture Anya gave. It was something which i think every Panchi lover on this forum must have wanted to give her. He he he! Eager to read the next part. Want to see what will happen in nonu-moti convo. But update on your own time. I don't mind. Thanks for an awesome update.

I will not abandon it, not without a reason for sure. That's the reason why I'm still contemplating converting this into a proper fanfiction storyline.

Thanks. I was a little nervous of the KD-Piddi conversation, was seeming OOC to me.

Anya's dialogues have a deeper meaning than we saw in this update. There's a lot more to come in that relation. Even Panchi likers would want to knock this sense into her.

Thanks.

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Priyanka

@CoffeeAddict

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#99

Originally posted by: ABCDesiGirl93
even though there was barely any kisha i still loved it!

KiSha is coming... Wait and watch.

Thanks.

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Priyanka

@CoffeeAddict

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 13 years ago

#100

Originally posted by: kittu_arsha
Ahaaan ! M kinda liking Aanya ! :D

Bobby-Piddi-KD Trip ws FUNNY..Bobby uff Babita with an IPad..haha :P

n then the Girls Chat in the Washroom..It ws Interesting..Lets see what Panchi will do now !

Ranveer's Possesive fr Panchi n I Love It whwnever They say ! HE'S my Best Friend..She's My Best Friend..Awww !!

RaHi Forever n Ever .. UPDATE the next part Very Soon ! N Thanks fr the PM :)

PS : I loved how u translated Samar's Dialogues..haha ! AMAZING Work Pree..Keep It Up :)

Thanks. I like Anya too.

I wanted to show that being a tomboy is not all about sports.

Panchi is gonna blast RV. 😆

I hope RV's possessiveness was not out of character.

Some of the readers were not able to understand Urdu.