DARK KNIGHT- A SwaSan FF- T2- DELETED- AN- PG 1 - Page 40

Res for chapter 13

Res 😊

Un-Res

Shru, truly after reading this chapter 3 times, and then re reading the entire DK saga once again on Sunday, I am at a loss to try and explain to you, within the limitations imposed by words, what I want to express. If you were in front of me, I would have given you a giant, tight hug, to express how much this story means to me. You told me, that you would be eager to ensure this outstripped my earlier favorites among your splendid body of work "Restored by Grace" and "Trial by Fire", and by God, with the last 2 chapters (12 and 13), you've done it, my dear. I am IN LOVE with this story. 😊

Its so powerful, so moving, I get goosebumps when I read it now, and the best part: the intensity and the sheer drama (in a good sense, not melodrama!), has built up so well, so tantalizingly.

I loved both parts of chapter 13. The first one showed Annapurna in all her regal hauteur, her aura and sheer magnificent air of power she conveys, is so spellbinding! Truly a mother of the soul and heart to Sanskaar, though not of the womb. I earlier used to think she was the one who witnessed the SwaSan and Ragini interaction in that earlier chapter, before Sanskaar took Swara "hostage" and rode away. But I have a lot of doubts now. She doesn't seem like a person who would let signs of such obvious maleficent deceit by Ragini go unchecked. Why would she want to tie her son with such a diabolically conniving princess?

The way she handled Kaveri was masterful. Seeti worthy!! 👏 👏 I was literally lost in admiration of her sheer grit and innate dignity! Those little touches you imbued that scene with: how Annapurna views Sujata (exasperated with her lack of perspicacity and decorum, yet wondering if she is really after all, as silly as she makes herself out to be!); how Annapurna knew that asking the Gadodia ladies to withdraw now would seem an insult to them; and how slyly Kaveri was trying to extort more hush money from the ruling family!

So Durga Prasad had a sordid liaison with Kaveri huh? 🤢 I did suspect that, given a stretch of Annapurna's dialogue to him in a previous chapter! And it does seem that the Maheshwari men tend to fall for the wrong kind of women! Durga Prasad got briefly captivated by Kaveri; Sanskaar was entrapped for a bit by Kavita; and reading between the lines of Kavita's dialogue to Sanskaar, it seems there was some "misunderstanding" which Lakshya had about Kavita's intentions towards himself as well? Plus, Annapurna says to Kaveri, that her daughter was a trollop, no better than Kaveri herself, and just as Kaveri had conducted a liaison with her (Annapurna's) husband the Rana, Kavita had set her cap on their son. I wonder, if by Their Son, did Annapurna mean the son of the house, the illustrious Prince Sanskaar? Or was Kavita (under Kaveri's guidance), also making a play for the crown prince---Adarsh, the nondescript nonentity? And perhaps in that process, Kavita genuinely fell for the much more dashing and valorous Prince Sanskaar?

Ragini---again, conflicted between her sense of shame and guilt for what she's done (though its not yet a crushing sense of remorse or a desire to redeem herself!), and a sense of victory and satisfaction at having got what she wanted (marrying the Prince of her dreams! 🤢). And I couldn't help grinning a bit that Princess Snake here is as haq and pehla pyar obsessed as the one in the serial! My, my, she certainly found enough solace in the arms of Prince Lakshya, to momentarily quell her pangs of guilt na? 😆 😉 Completely made for each other, these two!!

May I also say, that I found it realistic and understandable, that you have hinted at a considerable degree of intimacy in the past, including, as I would read it, physical intimacy, between Prince Sanskaar and Kavita. Its difficult to countenance 😊, one would certainly wish that it hadn't been the case, especially given our modern preference and acceptance of monogamy. But those times were different after all, the Ranas and Princes were not (with a very few notable exceptions), known to be monogamous. There are a few examples of Ranas being faithful to a favorite wife later, once married---but I guess it would be realistic and expected of the times, to show dalliances with other women prior, even marriages, come to that. Sad but true, that in the culture of the time, it was almost a proof of virility, wasn't it...

Sorry--I think I rambled a bit there; but I wanted to convey, that though this is something which might potentially cause Swara heartburn and pain (perhaps even doubt?) in the event Kavita makes a re entry 🤢 😡, the portrayal itself, is authentic for its time.

Coming now to Part 2---Can I just say---Oh My God... ❤️ 🤗

I was blown away by the poignancy, the intensity, the sheer soul connect between Sanskaar and Swara here. It was poetic almost. The sheer agony and pain Swara goes through on his behalf, unable to countenance the fact that he may be injured enough to die. The way she flinches while stitching his deep gash, each plunge of the needle making her recoil as if the pain was hers! I loved the way Sanskaar thinks in his delirium---as if he was Samarjit...the plunge of the needle making him dream of the plunging of sharp rapiers into his body, the disinfecting alcohol Swara applies to his cuts and wounds making him think of the fire ravaging his body, as he screams in agony and vengeance over the loss of his beloved Kalyani.

For Sanskaar at that moment, Kalyani and Swara merge into one---the adored love, the very reason for existence of Samarjit and Sanskaar! What a portrayal that was!

And despite his raging fever, the pain of his wounds and his delirium, when he is able to recover lucidity enough, all he feels is relief that Swara is alive, and distress that she is crying over his plight. He still cannot bear her tears, even at that point when he is so wounded! The touch of her fingers seemed like a cooling salve to his raging fever, and she really does take wonderful care of him, making him drink water, and the medicine she hastily but expertly prepares...The fact that her own cheek is stinging from the slap that vile thug dealt her, the fact that her lip is slightly cut, is not of any concern to her whatsoever, in the frenzy of her absolute distress for Sanskaar. What is love after all, if not feeling the pain of the adored one as even worse than one's own? Swara is in love with Sanskaar already---she just needs a little bit of time to realize it fully! Dare I say, the awareness has already started! 😳

And that stretch at the end, elevated me to tears (i refuse to use the term reduced me to tears, for such an almost spiritual feeling). Swara burning with agony at the marks of torture upon Sanskaar's back; feeling all the anguish and heartbreak that only a person in love, can feel! It was just so awesome, the way she weeps that if she could take away his pain, she would...she can never believe that he could be a traitor, a murderer. She has come to see that Sanskaar has a heart of gold, the spirit of a true patriot. She has seen the depth and goodness of his character, and knows that he has borne the most inhuman, soul crushing of tortures without being broken.

That whole scene, of her hugging him, weeping over his wounds, gently and briefly kissing the scars on his upper back---it was so full of love--on a spiritual, soulful plane. What I loved too, was Sanskaar's reaction here. He initially felt aghast that Swara might feel disgust at these marks of being branded and punished as a traitor, feared that perhaps, she might even feel a debasing pity for him. A man of his temperament would never want to accept craven pity from anyone, especially not from the lady whom he adores almost to the point of veneration! But on hearing her grief stricken words for him, that hard knot of pain, that canker of bitterness and resentment he had against the world, dissolves into nothingness...that single teardrop that flows down his cheekbones...😭 Reminded me of that single drop which fell from Sanskaar's eyes in the serial, when Swara was booted out of home by Ragini. Really, the value of that teardrop---worth its weight in gold and platinum!

BTW, I forgot to mention, that in Swara's frantic talk to Sanskaar, trying to keep him conscious, it was so moving, that she kept saying she just wanted him back, smiling and talking--even shouting and being angry at her was fine! And the way she described his wonderful brown eyes, beneath his luxuriant lashes. 😳 The Mermaid certainly has been looking at Prince Charming a lot! 😉

Can't wait for Chapter 14 my dear!

Lots of Love,

----Viji

Res

Finally now unresing chapter 13

Oh God! Shruti, this was too amazing I tell you! I love this FF tooo much would be an understatement. Seriously. Each chapter is too good that it would be so hard to say which one is the best!
The spoiler was so not to be given Shruti! I can't wait for chapter 14 now!! Restless since the day I read this chapter. Ok so coming onto it-
So RagLak are married and Lakshji seems to have given Ragini ji her HAQ! Ahem.. ahem and when Annapurna is talking to her, Ragini is daydreaming of her nights spent with Lakshya🤣. Sorry Shru, I couldn't helping laughing at that. Such a hilarious situation that was!!

Sujata can never change!! Blabbering Bird. So Kaveri ji is here to get justice for her daughter. I'll take a hunter and I swear, I'll whip and lash her with iron chains and whips!! Then she'll know what justice is bl***y b**ch!! I'll keep her in prison for two years and then will ask her that tell me what killing means!! I loathe her sooo damn much!! Ugh.. disgusting lady!

Annapurna was amazing! The way she lashed out the truth to her was amazing! This vile of a woman deserves nice slaps right infront of everyone for asking justice for her daughter. Bloody criminal!! Somebody please kill her plsss. My Sanskaar!😭 I love this lady Annapurna Maheshwari. She has such a royal aura around her and she's full of confidence and leadership qualities. Very good! Amazing Queen<3 The way she KICKED her out was too awesome and fabulous. Oh God! If I start swearing here na, so I won't be able to rant on SwaSan!

So coming to SwaSan! OMG This is an epitome of sheer brilliance and perfection. It was so beautiful that I could feel it seep in through me! Sheesh Shru. This was too good and I'm never gonna get tired of saying this seriously!
I love this horse! I want Veer! Seriously I do because often when our own ain't reliable animals are and these animals are much better. I love him. OMG!! Swara was stitching him. Eeeks. How painful it would have been! I had shudders when she did that making herself as hard and steel as she could! Oh God!! And the way she kept on blabbering to him and kept talking to him was such a sweet gesture full of concern and heartache at seeing his injuries. I so loved this!!

Sanskaar!! What he must be going through. These physical injuries and the mental torment seething in him was too much for him to bear. Man!! I swear I had wanted to cry at this horrible sight! You wrote it so beautifully and painfully that the thought of it sent creeps through me! But as soon as he felt Swara around him he felt relief. I was so happy, some of his pain was reduced! God and Swara herself was having such a hard time trying to first aid him! She tried to be brave and continued blabbering. If I would have been at her place I would have done the same! I could relate too much to her<3 Beautiful piece of writing dude.

The best part was when she saw the scars of how he'd been tortured. The way she screamed. While Sanskaar thought that she would be ashamed, her reaction amazed me. I totally loved the confidence with which she said that Sanskaar can't be a traitor and she's absolutely right! A man with such an esteem and valor can't be a traitor! The way she hugged him and lightly kissed his scars! Oh Jesus! I tell you this is one of the most beautiful scenes I've read and I just couldn't help the shudders run through me. These two are so magical so beautiful and just so complete!
That lone tear! It was so beautiful both on the parts of Sanskaar and Swara!
I loved this one Shru! Understatement. I'm deeply and irrevocably in love with this FF!
Thats better

Chapter 13:

Shruti

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Res 😊

Shru, Shru, my dear 🤗 🤗

You mentioned in your reply to my last comment I guess, either on thread or over scrap I don't recall, that you'd be doing your best to make me adore this piece even more that your previous ones which I have a soft corner for. 😉 And let me tell you, it has come within a very few inches. I still barely hold on to my old favorites amongst your pieces, but by God, this chapter was a rollicking, edge of the seat, excitement filled romantic action thriller. I know, I know, that combination of genres seems unlikely, but with all the angst, realization of love, mingled denial and resistance to the emotion between the lead pair, and then that stupendous action sequence amongst the sand dunes---whet else can I term it? 😃

To start off: the description of the desert vistas. Breathtaking!! As I've told you before, I'm more of a mountains and beaches person; but the stark beauty of the sand dunes is really awesome too. I'll always remember my trip to the Sem sand dunes from Jaisalmer; as well as the desert dune safari when I visited Dubai.

Your vivid imagery of the shifting sands of pale gold and ochre, beneath a cerulean sky, brought that whole scene alive before my eyes! As did your exquisite description of the ruins of Samkalgoonj---the piled stones of cream and amber. Aaahhh...you really catered to my obsession with colors! 😛

Sanskaar dressed in white robes with a headgear giving him a slightly rakish appearance. I like, I like!! Swara dressed in saffron and cream sounded very fresh and lovely, too.

And that cute little scene, deftly portrayed, of them getting lost in each others eyes after he huskily reveals his thoughts---that he's never seen anything (or anyone!) as exquisitely beautiful as Swara...Madam realizes the import of his words too, flushes a very becoming pink!!

The whole sequence of Sanskaar's anguished words to Swara, recounting the futile and doomed love of Samarjit---the gates to his heart were well and truly opened now, he couldn't help but let his emotions in her blessed company, wash over him. And though it seemed to Swara that Sanskaar was talking of his lost love, Kavita; he was in fact speaking of his growing feelings for Swara, emotions which he was convinced, were doomed from the start.

That scene of them praying before those makeshift idols---where each prays that the other finds peace, happiness and contentmenr--that was so very moving, Shru. I had hoped that this scene would come in this chapter, right from the time you described the ruins in the previous one. I was literally thirsting to read what the Mermaid Princess and Prince Scrumptious would pray for---and I got everything that I wished for!! You made my prayers come true, Sis!! 😛 🤗

That lovely scene where Sanskaar's defences crumble, and that epiphany hits him squarely between his eyes---that he loves Swara like he does nobody else, like he did nobody else, come to that. That he wants to have a life with her, make her happy, if only he could allow himself to love her and seek her love in turn. What a man of steel he is, still trying so very hard to clamp down on these emotions, since he feels he does not deserve Swara in a way. He is still consumed with guilt for his part in bringing her to this pass, and is probably convinced she would be happier with a person who is less complex, who has not undergone so much pain and bitterness in life.

All that maelstrom of frustrated desire and longing, and a desperate attempt to stopper his own gushing love for her, forces that paroxysm of rage from him, doesn't it? Where he rages at Swara, screams at her for being foolish enough to ffel considerate for him, commiserate with his pain. Its almost as if he wants to make her hate him. 😭 That would, in his tortured mind, be easier to bear at the moment, than her warm concern which is coaxing his mind and heart into such impossibly beautiful dreams. The whole stretch of their near violent argument, with him forcing a dagger into her hands and yelling at her to go ahead and stab him---was a masterstroke. WOW! 👏 👏

And if that heart pounding interaction was not enough, which had already taken me to the edge of my seat, you made me completely fall to the ground in a spiral of nervous tension, with that fight scene. The Valiant "Dark Knight" Sanskaar---you just ensured that he has obliterated Christian Bale from my mind, whenever the term "Dark Knight" is used. 😃 What an enigma, what a man!! The way you described him with sword and daggers, defending the love of his life (for in reality, he is fighting to save her, not himself!)---fabulous!

And fantastic as the fight scene was, what followed was even better. Sanskaar's anguished cry of "Swaraaa", literally a call filled with rage, frustration and agony, echoing across the very landscape and the heavens above. He was really Samarjit at that moment, wasn't he----wanting to burn the world down at his mindless pain of being separated from his love, his very reason for living. And Swara feels that, too. She might still not have fully internalized what the fluttering feeling of warmth, affection and awareness she feels for Sanskaar is, but that cry struck a very deep chord within her. She wanted to go to him, be by his side, comfort him, tend to him. And the thought of losing him, possibly seeing him die, filled her with a desperate terror!

I loved how you gave my 3rd favorite character in this Fic (Veer of course!! 😛) such a lovely role here. Faithful, loyal, reliable and intelligent Veer!! Did everything he could, to help Swara pull Sanskaar up and seat him, and then cantered off towards the hidden mansion. That was a very nice factual touch, since horses are very intelligent animals, and do have a homing instinct of sorts.

I can't wait for Chap 13, darling!

Res

Unres:

Shruti,

Chapter 13 was awesomely heart wrenching and heart-warming at the same time. Brilliant update. <3

#Ragini
RagYa have taken their step forward in their 'blissful'(ignorant) married life. And Ragini is justifying herself to herself that everything was worth this sort of married life. Doesn't she realise she is living on borrowed time? *scoff*

#Mahesh Mahal Drama:
Annapurna is a formidable queen. She is such a composed person. I really enjoyed her putting Kaveri to her place. Dil khush ho Gaya.! Fabulous dailogues written so well. :)
Loved it!

#SwaSan:
Best SwaSan moment till date! <3 (and both weren't even in their proper senses) :P
Sanskaar's injuries had me cringing. That must have hurt. Shru, absolutely brilliant writing here. I can't express how impressed I am with how you showed Sanskaar's fever induced thoughts. It was an ovation worthy writing. And the emotions - don't get me started. The feelings you portrayed were breath taking. I had my fist over my heart by the end of it. That single drop of tear had so much significance. It showed the agonising torture Sanskaar went through and finally he was able to acknowledge it. Finally there was someone who understood and is there for him. My heart broke! Swara, this girl is amazing. She is strong and so freaking brave. So forgiving and understanding. She had the spotlights here.
Gripping, enthralling, captivating update! :)

Awaiting part 14 :)

-V

Originally posted by: bwvianna

Res - Chapter 12 ❤️
Just finished reading. What an amazing update.! - love realisation and so much action! I loved this update to the core. Will unres later. Fabulously done! ❤️ 😉

Unres:

Shru! <3

Intense update! Sanskaar love realisation <3 and some much awaited action. And you threw in the word 'lass' (even if by the loathsome outlaws)! Treat pe treat!

#Reaching Samkalgoonj
The description of the ruins was beautiful. I could imagine the dunes and the ruins and the sadness creeping within that something so beautiful could transform into ruins because of another beautiful thing - love.
Your description of them being as striking as the setting was brilliant. I could truly visualize the two like that. :)

#Conversations between the ruins
I could literally imagine Sanskaar being hit with the realisation that he is falling in love like a ton of brick just descending on his head. I want to commend you on the appropriateness of the reaction he ended up having. It was brilliant. The whole realisation to denial process with respect to Sanskaar's character was projected exactly as it should have been. No sane person in such a situation would have reacted any other way. Bravo! That whole dialogue answering Swara's question had me wincing at the cruelty of the world too. Ouch! :( Swara's still at the falling in love but not realising stage. She can feel his pain and prays for him! He prays for her! <3 Sanskaar Swara all out 'I hate you' argument. Poor guy trying to understand why his captive is not hating him for the kidnaping and what better way to put up all the walls again but by distancing oneself by showing their fake-worse side! Enjoyed every bit of it.!

#Outlaws Action!
Shruti, thanks for this. Was waiting for action.! I read this whole part with my heart in my mouth. I was so sure you would leave us a cliff hanger where Swara was taken away by the outlaws. Thank you for not doing that. Oh that whole 'Swaraaa' by Sanskaar was *shudder*! The whole action scene was really well written. I loved it! Sushena is dead? You killed him? :(

#Sanskaar is hurt!
I am hoping for some intense romantic moments now where Swara is taking care of Sanskaar. <3 Probably Swara will realise her love? Or we could have Sanskaar reveal all his secrets in his fever inducedstate of mind? Possibilites!!! ;)

Awaiting the next update! :)

-V

Originally posted by: bwvianna

Res