Swasan SS - Amour Orageuse - Chapter 10 page 41

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Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#111

Originally posted by: -Ros-
Hey 😳
This chapter was such a treat! Fully Swasanlicious! ❤️
That first part where they absorb & melt into each other was so serene. I felt at peace reading it.

I thought the word "pity" would make it's way into this story. I work in healthcare and I see so many people who's been some sort of trauma detesting and running away from being looked down with pity. It makes them feel less than what they already feel they are. So I totally understand Swara's POV.

I loved everything Sanskaar said to her about her selflessness. I really wish CVs would bring this trait of hers up in the show & Sanskaar to be the one to address it, because he's the only one who really sees it. What he says here is so right, it's admirable but she's self destructing as well. She always ends up hurting herself & those who truly cares for her (Shomi & Sanskaar) in the process. And the ones who she's doing this for uses her goodness against her & she gets door-matted.

Swara's confidence in Sanskaar to guide her & keep her out of harm is touching. She's so right. He knows her better than she knows herself. && Swasan do balance each other so well-- her idealism and his practicality helps the circle to come to a close.

So good to see their romance blooming. Both of them accepting & coming to terms with these feelings and letting it take course.

Thank you for that wonderful, detailed reply to my comment! 😳 And nooo you haven't disappointed me one bit, your writing is lovely! My name is Sneha, but I'm known by my pet name Ros here...you can call me either, I don't mind. 😳

I want to hug you out of happiness for such an awesome and long dissection of my update.. It has made me happy beyond words Ros (I think I'm gonna call you by this name I like the sound of it) 🤗❤️

That was what the readers needed after the heavy duty update I'd posted last and I think I took the right decision by dedicating a chapter full of Swasan for you guys..

Pity is something which comes very naturally to people when they see someone undergoing trauma, it isn't wrong but yet that is the last thing a person would want to see in the eyes of people around them if they want move on in life, it serves a hindrance to them. You work in a health-care? Wow that's noble Ros. 🤗

They should probably be showing a lot more in the show but they don't for reasons known only to them.. 😕And to an extent I have the same wishes you know because all of us have a clear idea as to who knows Swara in and out and that person is Sanskaar and no one else. So I wait for this day when he and Swara sit down and talk about their lives and thoughts and all like a couple does. 😊

And it is my dream to see Swara saying all these things to Sanskaar too, to show him how much she trusts herself with him it would be a beautiful scene if it is handled well. Don't you think? 😉

The romance has just started blooming with slight undercurrents of passion and intensity, it is yet to fully flower which it will in due course of time. Stay hooked to the story. 😃

Thank you so so so so much for this comment Ros and lastly I'm sorry for replying so late I have to study for my papers which start on this Sunday and end on Monday. 😳

Will update soon.

Thank you.

Love,

Kashmi 🤗

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Annu

@ANNU30

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#112

A👏👏wesome update... day by day swasan love and understanding getting more stronger. Without saying a single word if ur loved one understand ur feeling and gesture that is called true love.

i m never good with words of praise, but im really trying to convey to you kashmi... 😳😊

Please update soon...

Edited by ANNU30 - 9 years ago

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Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#113

Originally posted by: ANNU30
A👏👏wesome update... day by day swasan love and understanding getting more stronger. Without saying a single word if ur loved one understand ur feeling and gesture that is called true love.

i m never good with words of praise, but im really trying to convey to you kashmi... 😳😊

Please update soon...

Thank you so much Annu your feelings were conveyed to me and you need not write long comments for that this suffices for me really.

Sanskaar and Swara are soulmates of each other in every sense as they understand each other quite well..

I shall update only after Monday now dear won't get time before that I'm sorry. But update coming on Tuesday for sure.. 😃

Love,

Kashmi

Quote

Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#114

Originally posted by: Miss-swasan
All of it FABULOUS

Thank you very much.. 😊

Quote

Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#115

Hey Kashmi...🤗 🤗

Was lovely interacting with you over PMs and on my thread yesterday and here I am on your wonderful thread, with such a powerfully narrated tale. Actually, I'd typed a detailed comment yesterday, after reading all the 5 chapters together with great interest, and lost the whole thing since my net was down when I pressed "post reply". 😭 Sorry about that.

Where do I begin, Kashmi? Really, you have done such a good job with this piece, and being your first work on the forum, kudos to you on the choice of subject, the sensitive way you've handled it, and the very powerful way you have portrayed the emotions of all the characters.

Attempted rape/ sexual molestation is such a heinous crime, and one of the worst aspects is the psychological impact on the survivors. You portrayed this so sensitively right from Chapter 1. I was literally wincing in the beginning, feeling helplessly furious at Lakshya for daring to attempt this contemptuous crime, on a woman who is his brother's wife; and whom he claims to love. What kind of love is this, that involves forcing himself on her? When she has told him clearly, time and again, that she doesn't care for him, and only loves Sanskaar?

Man, Lakshya is so vile here, so contemptible. I can only hope he gets the due punishment for his sins.

You handled this traumatic subject with the utmost sensitivity. Kudos for that.

The highlight of Chapter 2, was Sanskaar's gut wrenching concern, love and protectiveness for Swara; and his guilt for not having been there to protect her/ rescue her. It isn't really his fault, but one could see the sheer agony he went through, seeing Swara like that. I just loved the way he handled Lakshya, punching him and slapping him like he deserved.

And the SwaSan interaction, where he promises himself silently, that he will bring her joyful, confident self back, was so moving.

Chapter 3 was amazingly moving, the way Sanskaar so gently, so carefully held Swara and removed the memory of Lakshya's lust, hate and anger, with his own loving and tender touch. I want to salute you here for emphasizing the tenderness and caring aspect of the scene, rather than making it sensual of passionate---as Swara was really not in that frame of mind at all. Sanskaar, too was approaching it as a comforting, protective gesture and not a "leading to more" act, and you portrayed that with such finesse.

And here you gave us a glimpse into Ragini's mind as a woman, as a human being. Finally, she realizes what her sister has gone through. What is the point of her obsessive fascination for Lakshya when he is a man with such a weak moral compass? Intoxication, after all, is just an excuse. The lack of control, the crazed lust which is evil enough to result in this action lay dormant within, the alcohol just loosened it from its lair. Glad that Ragini realized this, and got on track for her long overdue redemption! The way Lakshya was trying to blame Swara for the crime, almost hinting that she brought it on herself, was just so contemptible! Ugh, that man!! 🤢

Chapter 4: I was amazed yet again, and severely disappointed at Annapurna's stand of trying to find excuses for Lakshya. Lakshya himself, again says that he couldn't help himself, he was intoxicated, and couldn't bear it when Swara kept pushing him away, and saying she loved Sanskaar and Sanskaar only! Lakshya, I think, really doesn't understand the meaning of the word "NO". Sickening guy.

But Durga prasad rose to the occasion and insisted that Lakshya would be punished for his sins, and no one would shield him. I felt very proud and happy when Swara very firmly told Annapurna she couldn't forgive Lakshya for this crime.

And Ragini, too, stood by Swara and Sanskaar, and handed over the house and safe keys; giving up her attempt to ruin the Maheshwaris. At least she has reached a realization and repentance of her sins, still a far cry for Lakshya!

Chapter 5: I liked the delicate touch and nuance with which you have shown the comfort and awareness between Swara and Sanskaar. She is still so unselfish, she doesn't want news of Lakshya's arrest to leak out in the media and for their family reputation to be harmed. She also doesn't want her folks to pity her and feel sorrow at what happened to her. It was good to see Sanskaar admiring her yet again for the wonderful, selfless person that she is.

All in all, a great start and most enjoyable read, Kashmi. 🤗 Good Luck with your Exams, and look forward to chapter 6, after Monday, I think you said?

Wish you and your family a Very Merry Xmas!! 😊

Quote

Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#116

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum
Hey Kashmi...🤗 🤗

Was lovely interacting with you over PMs and on my thread yesterday and here I am on your wonderful thread, with such a powerfully narrated tale. Actually, I'd typed a detailed comment yesterday, after reading all the 5 chapters together with great interest, and lost the whole thing since my net was down when I pressed "post reply". 😭 Sorry about that.

Where do I begin, Kashmi? Really, you have done such a good job with this piece, and being your first work on the forum, kudos to you on the choice of subject, the sensitive way you've handled it, and the very powerful way you have portrayed the emotions of all the characters.

Attempted rape/ sexual molestation is such a heinous crime, and one of the worst aspects is the psychological impact on the survivors. You portrayed this so sensitively right from Chapter 1. I was literally wincing in the beginning, feeling helplessly furious at Lakshya for daring to attempt this contemptuous crime, on a woman who is his brother's wife; and whom he claims to love. What kind of love is this, that involves forcing himself on her? When she has told him clearly, time and again, that she doesn't care for him, and only loves Sanskaar?

Man, Lakshya is so vile here, so contemptible. I can only hope he gets the due punishment for his sins.

You handled this traumatic subject with the utmost sensitivity. Kudos for that.

The highlight of Chapter 2, was Sanskaar's gut wrenching concern, love and protectiveness for Swara; and his guilt for not having been there to protect her/ rescue her. It isn't really his fault, but one could see the sheer agony he went through, seeing Swara like that. I just loved the way he handled Lakshya, punching him and slapping him like he deserved.

And the SwaSan interaction, where he promises himself silently, that he will bring her joyful, confident self back, was so moving.

Chapter 3 was amazingly moving, the way Sanskaar so gently, so carefully held Swara and removed the memory of Lakshya's lust, hate and anger, with his own loving and tender touch. I want to salute you here for emphasizing the tenderness and caring aspect of the scene, rather than making it sensual of passionate---as Swara was really not in that frame of mind at all. Sanskaar, too was approaching it as a comforting, protective gesture and not a "leading to more" act, and you portrayed that with such finesse.

And here you gave us a glimpse into Ragini's mind as a woman, as a human being. Finally, she realizes what her sister has gone through. What is the point of her obsessive fascination for Lakshya when he is a man with such a weak moral compass? Intoxication, after all, is just an excuse. The lack of control, the crazed lust which is evil enough to result in this action lay dormant within, the alcohol just loosened it from its lair. Glad that Ragini realized this, and got on track for her long overdue redemption! The way Lakshya was trying to blame Swara for the crime, almost hinting that she brought it on herself, was just so contemptible! Ugh, that man!! 🤢

Chapter 4: I was amazed yet again, and severely disappointed at Annapurna's stand of trying to find excuses for Lakshya. Lakshya himself, again says that he couldn't help himself, he was intoxicated, and couldn't bear it when Swara kept pushing him away, and saying she loved Sanskaar and Sanskaar only! Lakshya, I think, really doesn't understand the meaning of the word "NO". Sickening guy.

But Durga prasad rose to the occasion and insisted that Lakshya would be punished for his sins, and no one would shield him. I felt very proud and happy when Swara very firmly told Annapurna she couldn't forgive Lakshya for this crime.

And Ragini, too, stood by Swara and Sanskaar, and handed over the house and safe keys; giving up her attempt to ruin the Maheshwaris. At least she has reached a realization and repentance of her sins, still a far cry for Lakshya!

Chapter 5: I liked the delicate touch and nuance with which you have shown the comfort and awareness between Swara and Sanskaar. She is still so unselfish, she doesn't want news of Lakshya's arrest to leak out in the media and for their family reputation to be harmed. She also doesn't want her folks to pity her and feel sorrow at what happened to her. It was good to see Sanskaar admiring her yet again for the wonderful, selfless person that she is.

All in all, a great start and most enjoyable read, Kashmi. 🤗 Good Luck with your Exams, and look forward to chapter 6, after Monday, I think you said?

Wish you and your family a Very Merry Xmas!! 😊

Viji.. 🤗

Hey its alright yaa I'm sorry that you had to type it out all over again for commenting on my story and I can't say how much I'm pleased to read your feedback on my story, thank you so very much Viji literally made my day to read such an amazing and detailed analysis over what I've written..

Thank you so very much, I'd been very apprehensive about posting it as I said to you over our PM convo's coz not everyone is cool reading such dark stories, people mostly like reading romcom and happy go lucky type of stories I knew I was experimenting and might not get a response which I actually wanted to have but I got exactly that and more I've been so lucky in that aspect and I'm glad now that I took that leap of faith.. Yet again thanks Viji for appreciating my experiment? I'd say..

You know actually everyone told me that people were wincing when they were reading what I'd written in the first chapter the brutal actions of Laksh and Swara's molestation, they said they could feel the dark aura spread as they read on but somehow when I was typing the chapter I didn't flinch but continued writing as the words came out naturally the scenes very clear in my mind the reactions of my characters very clear, yes the dark aura did spread around me too that part wasn't particularly difficult to write rather the one's that followed were difficult to handle and write because more than the incident the after effects are difficult to deal with. The Storm comes and destroys but what becomes difficult is to restore back to normal after that storm.

Sanskaar's pain and Agony also came easily to me as I could feel his heartbreak and agony as a lover who failed in protecting his life from his perspective though Swara doesn't really hold him wrong. The shower scene and the flashback are my personal favorites too I love them.. I think they came out pretty decent.. They pretty much came out like I'd imagined and visualized in my mind.

I wanted to redeem Ragini here because if she had gone ahead and supported Laksh just like Annapurna did in her blind motherly love she would stoop as low as Laksh so I wanted her to bring her back before she went beyond the point of redemption.. She deserves too because she has shown traits in the beginning of the show that she is capable of being compassionate and loving and caring for others too.

I wanted a light weight chapter after the whole showdown in the fourth chapter because IMO it was pretty heavy duty and lacking in Swasan so I thought of giving my readers a Swasanlicious chapter..

I'm just so glad you have liked it very glad..

Yes I shall update once I'm through with my papers so I can think and write a nice chapter.. Thank you for your wishes Viji..

Love,

Kashmi 😃

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lovi9

@lovi9

Beginner

Posted: 9 years ago

#117

why laksh always... itna bad 🤢.. 😭 laksh is not that cheap and bad yaar bt itzz okk...nice start

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Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#118

Originally posted by: swathi_swaron
res

Dj 😃

You commenting on my thread is like wow yippee I'm waiting for your feedback jaldi se likha bada waala fatafat.. 🤗

Quote

Swathi

@swathi_swaron

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#119

Originally posted by: Autumn_Hue

Dj 😃

You commenting on my thread is like wow yippee I'm waiting for your feedback jaldi se likha bada waala fatafat.. 🤗

first of all dont talk with me...😡
mein tumse bahut gussa hu
you have completed posting 5 parts and i came to know about this write up today😭
you dint even bothered to pm me na😭

Quote

Autumn_Hue

@Autumn_Hue

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#120

Originally posted by: swathi_swaron
first of all dont talk with me...😡
mein tumse bahut gussa hu
you have completed posting 5 parts and i came to know about this write up today😭
you dint even bothered to pm me na😭

Arreyyy dj I didn't know you follow this show agar Pata hota toh I would have sent you a PM long ago kasam se believe me.. 😭