Posted:
Saku
I'm back with my remaining comments in stages as I promised. Sorry if this is frustrating but I'm snatching time here and there and I can't do justice to rushed comments on your work from the phone hence this approach!
Chapter 8 - what a chapter! The impact of a whole book in one chapter almost! I'm so in love with these late conversations between these two. The repartee just flows and the secrets are revealed, walls between them destroyed forever. Aha!!! So Swara isn't shekhar's daughter! I was right that something was off there and it was this. Like the way the show track is reworked here and it has such a convincing pathos to it. Also Sanskaar relating to that- him an unwanted child too?! Hmmm. The Icarus references here are at their most powerful and the impact too. The whole scene between them is utterly compelling and oh gosh that kiss!! That's truly shocking in a way as you warned but also feels so totally right and natural at that point in the story, it seemed there wasn't anything else that could happen!
Chapter 9 - so it starts with where the previous left off and boy what a pleasant shock and surprise it was that Swara was the one who did what we have come to expect from Sanskaar in the show! She owned her love and didn't back away from it and disregarded his attempt at masking what it really is. I loved this! And I also loved that SK too absorbed that and wasn't able to stay immune for long. The whole explanation of why he fears love was masterful. And of course their then decision to do the only inevitable thing- be together. This then offset so well by the drama the next day with Lakshya finally getting a chance to corner Swara to leak some poison. Oh of course before then as well the investigative scene was just pitched right. But the end of this chapter was the reveal stage 1 for Swara. Now the test of how their relationship tackles things will come.
I have to sleep now but will comment on 10 and onwards tomorrow on this same post:)
Chapter 10 - really like how SK has Vic to talk sense to both the stubborn mules here. I loved how you played the scene of SK's big reveal to Sanskaar although as I said above, to me he became that before when he was with Casper and I started seeing them as SwaSan anyway. This line, "By choosing my side you had just entered an arena of war Miss Gadodia, here either you'd be my sword or his shield, either way you will bleed. " I particularly found impactful. I liked the way you twisted what we get on the show to make it so much more real and also heartfelt in terms of Sanskaar being so affected by the tears but holding back for her protection. The next bit too was good. Sanskaar's error in leaving Swara gets her arrested and Sanskaar being SK decides to visit Ragini- the master strategist at work. Action over reflection needed and delivered. Very finely done.
Chapter 11 - so many fascinating layers here as you build up to the finale. As you probably know from my writing, I have always had a fascination with Annapurna. I feel she gets wasted in the show and there is an innate dignity about her, that regardless of whether you agree with her or not (and I mainly don't) you can't help but admire something in her. It's what we would call true grit I guess- have you seen the films? Then there was the SK conformation with his father in a territory that should have been hostile to him but he turned the tables with true style by revealing he knows his rights.
Then there were the 2 "wham" moments in quick succession. First Sanskaar's confession to Swara- so Sanskaar! Direct but heart meltingly so. And the whole Annapurna angle- even this was layered in itself! First SK's colour blindness! I knew something was up with he files!! Ha! And then Sanskaar not being her son biologically but clearly the child of her heart as we heard from her herself previously! And then finally the fact that the real betrayal was hers. Once again at that point that fab line you used in the beginning "Broken heart, denied love and breached trust are those." when referring to things that made death preferable. Oh and not to forget that mehndi comes into play ahain, this time as a code cracker! Fantastic! Chapter 12 - the crescendo is rising to a pitch now. The court room drama was again totally gripping. I loved the two adversaries battling it out but as the stakes are more than life or death important for Sanskaar he clearly took the lead. I loved now the clues now started stacking up and seeing how Mr Brilliant pieced things together. Vans he created such a good angle to this tale and the whole linking him as actually Ragini's lover and nothing really to do with Swara expect the role that Sanskaar played in the real show was really nice I though. And so Ragini confesses at the end but I don't for one minute believe this is it, she hasn't done it has she?! 😉
Finale - the finale was truly masterful. The SwaSan moments of course but the real piece de resistance here was the mother-son interaction and the reveal of why Annapurna Maheshwari is truly a matriarch. Fantastic Saku! And so the jigsaw is finally pieced together! Aha knew it wasn't Ragini and I promise I hadn't been cheating as I read- I never read the end before, it would spoil the journey of the book for me:). So Lakshya all along and the whole charade mainly to protect spoilt rich brat by so many. The ending was as perfect as the rest. These lines were truly deserving of the his splendid fiction: "I knew in later years that we both found what we were looking for that day. I found my destination after flying till my wings gave up and my skies changed. He found his peace and freedom...he found wings to fly away from his tormenting past. We found love, life and each other."
Overall, I can't really describe how much I thought of this. It truly deserves a standing ovation. I don't usually compare a writer's works- each one is different and some will undoubtedly appeal more to others than some. A lot of selective processing goes in. For me though, I so enjoyed this, I find it your best work in a splendid collection. Perhaps the legal base to it particularly appealed but it's not just that. I felt like you unfolded a truly spell binding tale and I applaud you for this one dear friend. I will get boringly repetitive but you made me fly very high in the skies much like Icarus and even when I fell in the end when the tale ended, the memories of that flight made it worthwhile:).
Lots of love,
Shru
Anupamaa
