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Hey everyone ! I m Samrajya laxmi wati and this is my second os on SwarYa . I m really happy to see new SwarYa FF in the town . Anyways I m here to entertain u all for one shot . Hope u like the os . Thanks to all the SwarYa- ians who gave such a lovely appreciation for my first os . Encouraged by your likes and feedbacks I m here again to annoy u all with my os . This is a sad one so please forgive me if u do not like this or I hurt your feelings .
My first SwarYa os
Intro
This is after the Begali new year . Dadi and Didaa are almost in good terms . Shekhar and Semistha are going to get married and Laskhya has unmasked all the truth to Ragini .
Lakshya POV
As I stood in the balcony motionless all the events of the day re telecasted in my mind . I hated the moment when I said the truth to Ragini . How she broke down and then cried so much . Her tears , I still feel guilty remembering them . Though I felt bad for Ragini, the sight that took away the ground beneath my feet was the sight of Swara . How tears invaded her eyes as she looked at the broken down Ragini . How her glare still hits my eyes every time I think about her . She was sad and angry and the most worst thing about this is that she was in this state because of me . I cursed myself . I never hated myself so much .
Today my heart realised what Swara meant to me . All these days , all those fights , each moment with her still is as fresh as cucumber in my mind . Her small gesture to kill me every time I irritated her , her fake annoyance every time u called her Shona and then her eyes betraying her and revealing that how much she liked it .
Yes today my heart felt that it had felt never before . A feeling to love someone so much that she will never doubt your love , a feeling to never let someone go , a feeling to protect her and never let those water droplets fall down her eyes .
I was still lost in my thoughts of my Shona , yes my Shona when I felt a small weight in my shoulders . I looked back to find the person who had taken away my senses , Swara .
She gave a faint smile as she looked at me .
"I m glad that finally u revealed the truth to Ragini "she said , pain in her each word . "Though she has broken down and not in a state to realise the better but I know she will come out of this pain soon . I know that she will be able to move on from you , her first love . "
Kyun dard chupaye baithi hai
Kyun tu mujhse kehti hai
Main toh khud hi bikhra huaa
"And what about u ?"I asked as she gave me a very surprised look . I tried to predict her answer as she opened her mouth. .
"What about me Laskhya ? What do u mean ? "She asked in a surprised tone . I looked away from her not wanting to look into her eyes which clearly showed her disappointment .
"I need to tell u something Swara "I said ignoring her question. I did not know how to answer her question as I was also confused with the question of mine.
"Tell me something , what Laskhya ? "She asked in a confused voice .
"A truth . "
"What ? There is one more truth that u have hidden from me ? "She asked angrily as I chuckled and closed my eyes. "Why ? "Her voice came up again .
"Because I also realised the truth today . I knew it right in my heart but somewhat ignored it . I know that u also know the truth but u have not realise it . The truth that has lingered in our life . The truth of my life , of your life , of our life "as I blurted those words I could her face expression changing but I did not let her speak and continued,"Swara I , I ...umm I love u . From the time I set my eyes first u . I always took this as a strange relation ,an unknown relation but today I m naming the relation as a relation of love . Swara I really love u "
Her eyes flamed in anger as she heard my words . Her hands moved in air to touch my cheeks when I stopped her midway .
"Not today Swara . Today I m not joking but for the first time in my life I m actually serious and telling the full truth . "
"How can u say this Lakshya ? "She said in almost the tone of utter amusement .
"Just like I said out the truth to Ragini , I m telling u the truth . And I m really serious Swara . I love u and I know that u love me also Swara "I said it out. Looking deeply in her eyes . Her eyes filled with anger but in this ocean of flaming anger I could see the light of happiness as if all these days she had wished to hear those three words from my mouth and drowned somewhere was sorrow , sorrow of maybe that I did not confess this earlier .
"How can u act so insane Lakshya ? And how can I love u ? U just broke my sister heart ! "She shouted at me as she turned away from me not meeting my eyes .
"Enough Swara ! Please do not keep blaming me for Ragini 's heart break . Let me just justify some things here ! First of all like I said I never loved Ragini so why blame me for her heartbreak . I did not say her to love me , did I? I was forced into marriage like she was . She developed a feeling for me which I did not . So where is my fault here ? Did I say or did confess in front of her or anyone else . Swara it would have been my fault if I had loved her and then said I did not . But I never did so u can not blame me into this Swara ! "I took it out . All the reasons that I could not explain , not to my dad , Ragini . I told it all to Swara cause I needed to , to prove her that this heart ,inside my chest ,now which was beating every second fearing losing the person standing in front of me , I person whom I love that this heart never had Ragini's name . "I never loved her Swara , I always had feelings for u ."
She did not reply but just stayed silent , maybe analysing my each word . I had explained my feelings towards Ragini now I was left to explain the feelings towards her .
"Swara , I never realised what I had in for u . Never could get what this word 'love ' meant . These three words that I confessed for u maybe I do not deserved them from your mouth but at least I deserve to hear what u really think about me Swara . What I really mean to u , honestly ! "As I said she turned to me and shook her head . I waited for her reply but it did not come . She just stood there numb as I slowly walked away.
"Lakshya "I heard her voice as I went to open the door . The name only sent hundred of butterflies down in my spine , her voice reverted in my mind as it marked in my soul . I looked at her hopefully when she opened her mouth .
She looked straight at me , "and who do u think u r ? Running round leaving scars ...collecting your jars of hearts and tearing love apart . U r going to catch a cold from the ice inside your soul so do not come back for me ...who do u think u r ? "
Her words pinned me down . I felt a huge weight in my heart as my eyes looked at her . A big sudden crash hit me . My hopes of getting her shattered into pieces as my heart yearned for going back . It took me sometime to adress her words and as it did , it echoed in my mind leaving my heart broken and my soul cut down into pieces .
The world of mine went down into a nightmare as the dream I just dreamt of ,flew away .
I did not know how to give answer her neither I knew if she really meant those rude words that somewhat got me out of the state of consciousness .
I turned back and walked slowly . "If u never loved me Swara and think that bad about me then it was my bad fortune. But if u said something u really did not meant then u will surely remember me after I go. And me ...I will be left bounded by the chains of your love to wait for u . Once u realise come back to me . I will be always there "I said in a low whisper knowing very well she heard each and every word .
I walked away from there ...
No one can be forced into love . Like Swara could not get me into Ragini's love I can not force her into mine . I loved her , I do and always will .I believe that she had always something for me which she needs to realise and my heart assured me she will soon . Just I will wait for the day ...u may be confused why I took the step . But I want Swara to realise her love for me . I have strength to leave her and wait for her comeback in my life which is now shattered and broken into pieces without her .
I will wait for her till death and maybe even after ...
At least for the first time in my life my heart and mind both have agreed in one term that my Shona will come back . Back to me ...
Haaye, andar andar se toota main..
Tere ishq mein khud hi se rootha main
---TBC---
Hope u all like it and I no intention to hurst anyone's feeling . I m just giving what I think Lucky feels about this confused state and who would he react once he realised his love . Anyways guys comment back your opinions and do not forget to hit the like button . Feel free to criticise !
And if u all like this and want me to continue , next time I will post Swara's view . What she really feels about Lucky .
Love
Sam
Real Estate
