From & To Sathish #5 - Page 94

Avan, Aval, Adhu 314

Madhu walked out of the hotel where she had gone to collect some things and caught sight of the man she had nicknamed Spartan leaning relaxedly against the car door. Seeing her, he quickly opened the door and shut it after she had gotten inside.

Adjusting the rearview mirror, he looked at her through it and said, ' Sorry ma'am but I could lay my hands only on this old sedan.'

' There is no need to apologize for that, Mr.Spartan, and please, no formalities and no more opening the car door or any other doors.'

She looked at his reflection in the mirror and after staring at it said, ' I might be wrong but I think you are new to this kind of work.'

The man smiled, ' You are wrong and you are also right, ma'am. I am new to this kind of work but not new to this line of work.'

Madhu liked the clever way he played with his words and so played along with him.

' By that you mean you have not worked as a personal bodyguard for anyone before this and by that I mean, like what you are doing right now. One on one.'

The man looked at her and smiled and gave her a mock salute and replied, ' You are a very shrewd lady, ma'am and I mean that as a compliment.'

' Thank you, Spartan ' and taking a moment to dwell on the name that she had used, looked into the small rear-view mirror, ' I think you are really spartan in your real life too. You look like a person who likes to work on his own most of the time.'

The man nodded, ' My line of work is a rather lonely and dangerous kind of work. But of course, I do work with others and sometimes as a part of a team.'

Madhu nodded, ' But I bet that even there, with teams, you will be the one leading them. Right, Spartan.'

The man smiled but did not reply immediately and instead concentrated on the traffic that was getting worse by the minute. Yet, his eyes kept a constant vigil on Madhu, and seeing her frown and worry about something, asked her what was troubling her.

' No trouble but I was kind of wondering if we could make it to the temple for a darshan before it closes for the morning.'

The man looked at his watch and said, ' I think we will be able to make it in just the nick of time, ma'am. But, I fear you might not be able to spend too much time in the temple for it closes by 12.30 pm. But the temple again reopens by 4.00 pm.'

' I know but 4.00 pm will be too late for I need to be somewhere else by 5.00 pm.'

Spartan said okay and honked a few times to get the traffic to give way but to no avail.

Madhu would have missed it if she had turned her face towards the window but she did not and saw the man whisper something into his mic that was hidden in his collar.

Just as she was wondering what he might have spoken, she heard the wails of a police siren right behind them and turning to her right saw a police jeep overtake them and slot itself in the front as the lead vehicle.

Where horns had not worked, the siren sounds of the police vehicle did and had an instantaneous effect on the traffic that split, scattered, and quickly made way for their vehicles.

The vehicle came to a halt outside the temple and the man tapped his watch and said, ' 12.00 pm. So, you have enough time to go and see the Gods.'

Madhu thanked him and opened the door to get out and instead, groaned loudly seeing the large crowd that was thronging in and out of the temple.

Spartan smiled, ' Not to worry ma'am. It has been taken care of.'

Madhu thanked him and looked at him enquiringly and the man called Spartan reading her mind, said, ' You go ahead, ma'am. I will park the car and join you in a few minutes.'

The man assigned to assist Madhu whispered into his collar mic, ' Thank you. Carry on. I will call in case I need your help again.'

His words traveled and were heard at one place and a few moments later were relayed to the police jeep that was parked near him. Opening the window of the car, he waved thanks to the disappearing police jeep and slowly moved forwards searching for a parking spot, and finding one a few cars ahead of him drove ahead of it so as to reverse into the spot. This had been instilled into his head and the reason was to make a quick getaway. Well, he thought so and after driving a few cars ahead, he put the car in reverse gear and hearing a screeching noise, turned and looked behind and saw a large Black BMW come to a screeching halt and park in the very spot that he had been planning to park his car.

' What an Ar.eh.le?' he thought and then caught sight of a man and woman getting out of the expensive sedan and told himself that it was not worth it and moved away and finding a spot a bit further away, parked it and walked towards the temple.

The time was 12.10 pm and assuming that his asset must have reached the inner sanctum, the man called Spartan casually walked into the temple and found her standing forlornly near the entrance along with thirty or more disgruntled devotees.

Several policemen were standing in front of them denying them access and one of them a Sub-Inspector yelled, ' Sorry, but the temple is closed. Please come back at 4.00 pm for the next darshan.'

One man yelled loudly, ' the time is still 12.15 and there are still 15 minutes of darshan time left.' Several of them raised their voices but it all fell on deaf ears.

The woman sitting in the middle of her flower stall and among mounds of several types of flowers mumbled loudly, ' This always happens when that nasty woman comes for her own private Darshan. What arrogance? She thinks she owns this temple and comes and goes when it pleases her?'

Madhu looked at the man and said, ' Spartan, let us go. There is no point in waiting here anymore.'

Another woman from the nearby stall jumped in with her own curses, ' Bloody funny that this spoilt brat was named Meenakshi after our own Amman.'

The first flower woman swore angrily and said, ' She is the best example for that term called Black sheep. If she is like this, her dad, our Iyaa is the exact opposite of his daughter and a real gem of a person. Even today, he walks barefoot to the temple from his house and back and greets everybody, and treats everybody with so much respect. God only knows how such a monster was born to such angels like him and his wife.'

Seeing her face suddenly filled with fear and anxiety, he enquired in a calm voice, ' ma'am, what is it? What is troubling you?'

Forcing a smile she tried but only managed to blurt, ' Nothing. Nothing ' and then whispered to herself, ' Nothing has changed. Maybe I was wrong in coming back into his life after all these years. If Meenakshi could unleash so much damage back then, God only knows what she will do if she sees me. But what could I do? What else could I do? I had to come. I had to come.'

Closing her eyes, she folded her hands and prayed in her soul, ' Mother, is there no end to our problems? Are we doomed to live and die in this twilight kind of life? Will you never rise and shine light into our hearts? What kind of mother are you? You seem to favor only those who are evil and never give people like me and Ravi a break. Even now, after all these years, you are planning to keep us away from each other.'

The man, her bodyguard who she had named Spartan felt her pain and heard her pain in his own mind and whispered into his mic that was hidden behind his collar and waited.

But they did not have to wait long for suddenly, the Sub-inspector's phone rang, and getting up he looked in the direction of Madhu and then spotting the man beside her, ran frantically towards him and said, ' Sir, ma'am, please follow me.'

He quickly led them away and informed them that this south gate was always crowded for it was the only entrance through which everyone could enter the temple premises.

After a few minutes of brisk walking, he stopped at a huge gate and said, ' This is meant for security services only. But, now it is meant for you too, ma'am.'

Madhu looked at the Sub-Inspector with disbelief and entered the temple in a daze. Spartan thanked the SI and said, ' Not a word. I mean it. Not a whisper to anyone.'

The SI nodded, ' Okay, sir. Mouth zipped. No noise. Not even to cough or spit.'

Spartan smiled and entered the gate and found Madhu in conversation with two elderly priests seeing him, exclaimed, ' Spartan, this is unbelievable. I don't know what is going on here.'

Pointing to the priests, ' They are giving me a special darshan and have also requested me to join them for lunch.'

Spartan smiled, ' Ma'am, the Gods must have finally heard your prayers.'

Avan, Aval, Adhu 315

I was born a few minutes before sunrise. From the womb of my mother, I slipped out and entered another womb called Mother Earth and I came alive just before the first rays of the sun reached me and my Planet. Maybe that is why I am so active during the day and somehow slump into lethargy as night and darkness fall on me.

From the time I was a kid, I have been fascinated with the Sun and its light and have spent countless hours by the window, squinting my eyes and staring at the sun until I can no more. When the sun was high and bright in the sky, I sat by the same window and watched its rays make their way into my home through open doors and glass windows.

I used to place my hand in those tunnels of light and wonder if they were gateways to another life and to another dimension. I was, am, and will always be fascinated by the sun for it is just so awe-inspiring in its power and majesty and like a mighty emperor sits in the center of its domain called The Solar System.

Our planet is huge but when compared to its parent star, The Sun, it pales miserably for it would take 333,000 earths to equal its mass and you can easily fit 1.3 million earth's into it. Mind-boggling isn't it?

Every morning, I finish my workout as quickly as possible and rush to the beach to catch the sun coming up and spend ten to fifteen minutes basking in its light until it becomes baking hot. Sometimes, I think I am a solar panel disguised as a human.

On the horizon, hovering over the deep seas like a red apple and sometimes like an orange, the sun appears like a tiny vulnerable tot. Wild imagination. My own private sun, after all.

I, you, and everything in this Solar system are held by its power called Gravity and that hold extends far out into deep space. The gravitational power and pull stretch out to nearly two light years. Whaat? Yes, the distance traveled by light in a year is called a light year and one light year is 9.46 trillion kilometers.

The space probe, Voyager one launched in 1977 is the farthest man-made object right now, and it is nearly 24 billion km away from us and is receding away from us traveling at 35,000 miles per hour. But even these awesome numbers mean nothing for it will take the Voyager One and other space probes launched in the 1970s another 14,000 years to even cross one light year, and then they still have a lot of ground to cover before they escape the sun's gravity totally and exit the solar system.

Wikipedia defines gravity as “a natural phenomenon by which all physical bodies attract each other.” It defines love as “a deep, tender ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward something or someone.”

You can best describe them both as the glue of interconnection between all things. They can be measured, formulated, studied, and many other things. However, they are nearly impossible to describe in words. Scientists don’t really know what they are. They are ineffable. They can only be sensed.

Gravity pulls all matter toward the center of Mother Earth. Just like any animal or human mother would pull her loved one towards her breast.

Gravity gives us a sense of weight, mass, and support. We wouldn’t be shaped as we are with strong core bones if we didn’t have to dance with gravity each moment.

When we walk through the world being loved, we also give and receive a sense of grounded open support. We are once again shaped clearly by our open-hearted vulnerability as our core pattern of strength.

Gravity gives us a clear sense of presence to feel fluidly as life force energy moves and weaves through us in a myriad of patterns. Our sense of navigating the world with ease, clarity, and embodied power depends on how we can dance our arising life force energy with that downward gravitational presence.

Love also defines a clear life path pattern. Living life as love allows navigation with compassion, courage, and abiding ease.

What could happen if we all opened to the idea that love and gravity may be the same force?

“The only way love can last a lifetime is if it's unconditional. The truth is this: love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.”

This story, our story is also about gravity. Romantic gravity. The problem in this system of Avan, Aval, Adhu is that all of the main characters are stars who orbit around each other. However far they seem to drift away from one another, they seem to exert a force on each other.

It is weird and funny, and both at the same time that life, love, relationships, emotions, and thoughts are all abstract in nature but still manage to exert so much gravity on our human lives.

At that very moment, Madhu entered Madurai Meenakshi Amman temple, Ravi walked out of the hospital with his mother and the time was 12.30 pm. Dharmalinga Thevar insisted that they both travel with him in his vehicle and so they did and set off toward Kumarapalayam.

At about the same time, Inspector Sargunam reached Whispering Rocks resort, and no sooner had the vehicle come to a halt, Parthiban leaped out of it and ran towards the white cab that was parked outside the gate.

Gesticulating wildly to Daksha, he waved her hands and yelled, ' The cab is here after all. Guna was absolutely spot on in his deduction about how the poor cab driver was murdered for his vehicle and which the criminal used to drive themselves up here.'

Daksha clapped her hands in admiration and said, ' Bravo, Guna. This theory of Motive, means and opportunity does explain how a crime has been committed and at the end by who or whom.'

' Sadly not in all cases, ma'am ' Guna said in a bleak voice and looked at them and seeing the questions in their eyes, ' Nearly 30,000 people are murdered every year in our country. That means an average of 80 to 82 people are going to be murdered and will not rise to see another day.'

' F..k me. Are you serious? ' Parthiban exclaimed and realizing that Guna was stating a fact, cursed, ' Jesus Christ, What the F..k is this world coming to?'

' I am quoting the exact figures that are in the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) report ' and opening the door of the cab, he stopped and looked at them and said, ' The same report also clearly states that nearly 52 percent of crimes involving murders go unsolved and soon become a cold case. So, it is obvious that theories and facts and even intelligence do not work all the time and in the end in most cases, the criminals do get away and roam around scot-free.'

Opening the door, Guna slipped into the front passenger side of the car and let immediately gasped and cursed, ' F..king BO. It's a sin that people are still unaware of deodorants and perfumes.'

They stood hearing him mutter, mumble, and curse, and then getting out of the car, he exhaled and inhaled desperately trying to get rid of the stink from his body.

' No doubts at all. The car is registered to Nalla Muthu, the person who was murdered. So, that is one detail out of the way and now we have to go in and identify the criminals and see what condition they are in.'

Daksha looked away with regret and Inspector Sargunam noticed her reaction, ' Ma'am, we were in a hurry and Master sir was our priority and also there was no space in the chopper for all four of them.'

Partha cursed angrily, ' Ducks, those people came to murder us. Just imagine the scenario and think what our situation would have been if Ravi had not stepped out and taken them on.'

Pointing to their resort, ' It would have been us lying there dead, murdered, and most probably buried somewhere deep inside the forest. Dead and gone.'

Daksha looked at him wearily and told him that she understood and felt all that he was feeling, ' still, it hurts badly that people can stoop to such acts. If only Ravi had not met Gayatri then all this would not have happened. We would have gone on living our lives in peace and happiness.'

Inspector Sargunam stared at her with a pained look and Daksha seeing his obvious discomfort asked him why he looked so disturbed and hurt, ' Did I say something wrong, Guna?'

' Yes ma'am, and I am sorry to say that, but you are wrong and are being slightly selfish in your thoughts.'

' Selfish, who me, us? ' Daksha questioned angrily and Guna's calm face reflected his master's calm state of mind.

' Ma'am, as I had mentioned earlier, if it had not been for Gayatri ma'am, I doubt if we could have saved master sir. But go back a little and recollect how that lady bravely fought against those temple thieves and how she risked her own life and dived into the lake to save those two boys. She in fact has done more good than bad to master sir.'

It was his turn to clap and Parthiban did exactly that and said, ' Bravo, Guna. Bravo. Ravi will be really proud of you for saying these words and not mincing them.'

Guna shook his head and looked at Daksha and said, ' Ma'am, from your own perspective, what you said was absolutely correct and there is no fault in thinking that way. It is instinctive and even though some will say like I did that it is selfish, the truth is that it is the human way to think for ourselves and things concerning us.'

Partha and Daksha saw his eyes fill with a look of pride and heard Guna say in a proud voice, ' But my master taught me to think differently and to look at everything and everyone with empathy.'

His satellite phone crackled and he answered it, ' Yes. '

' Sir, SubInspector Kumaran here, over.'

' Sollunga, Kumaran.'

' Sir, I am sorry but can you kindly repeat how many victims, dead or injured we were supposed to find here?'

Inspector Sargunam not sure if he had heard SI Kumaran properly asked him to repeat his words and when he did, looked at Partha and Daksha and then replied, ' Four victims. One, the Paliyan tribal was already dead when I examined him while the others looked in pretty bad shape.'

Then in a confused voice, ' But why are you asking me this, Kumaran? Are you telling me that all of them are dead?'

' No sir. What I am trying to tell you is that there is nothing here. No bodies, dead or injured. The whole place is empty.'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eq2Q1j7Adh4

Avan, Aval, Adhu 316

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” Marcus Aurelius

Life is full of permutations and combinations. Sometimes the order you do things matter sometimes it doesn’t, but in order to find the solution in life you must work through each possibility presented to find your opportunity.”

Partha and Daksha appeared as if they had been hit by the " Stupefy spell " made famous by the Harry Potter novels and stared unblinkingly at Inspector Guna and the satellite phone he was holding in his hands.

Then gasping in shock, they looked at each other and Daksha unsure of what she had heard asked Guna in a squeaky voice if they had all heard the same thing. ' How is it possible for four people to go missing? Surely, they could not have walked away on their own strength and then you have that tribal man...'

' He was dead. We all saw it and you too saw his body, Guna ' Partha said and looked at Guna hoping that he would have some kind of reasonable explanation about the missing criminals.

Bringing the satellite phone closer to his lips, Guna spoke into it in a calm voice and told his team what to do and how to go about it.

' Spread out in all four directions and look out for evidence that might have been left behind. I will join you guys at that spot in a few minutes. Over.'

Daksha asked in a panic-stricken voice, ' Guna what is going on here? How can people disappear into thin air?'

Inspector Sargunam shook his head and said, ' I have no idea as to what happened or what is going on here. But, one thing I know for a fact is, that people just don't vanish into thin air. Not dead or seriously injured people.'

' So, what do you think happened, Guna?' Parthiban asked him and Guna wearing a cryptic smile replied, ' There are other things and other people in play here.'

He looked at Daksha, ' ma'am, it will be really nice if you can conjure up some breakfast and a few buckets of coffee. I am really starving and the last I ate was a plain dosa late yesterday afternoon.'

Daksha's maternal instincts shone through instantly, ' Sure, Guna. Give me ten minutes and breakfast will be ready and I will see what more I can whip up for the rest of your team.'

' Okay, ma'am. I will be back in ten to twenty minutes' time ' and glancing at Partha, ' Sir, please stay here and close to ma'am and don't venture out without my permission.'

But before he could turn, Daksha grabbed his hand and asked him in a fear-filled voice, ' Is it possible that others, I mean other criminals are running around and that five or six but more were sent to attack us last night.'

Inspector Guna's eyes were inscrutable as was his tone when he spoke. ' Maybe. Maybe not. It is best that you not worry about all that and let me handle it.'

Both of them immediately tried to shoot off a counter reply but he calmly raised his hand and said, ' The case and evidence will eventually lead us to the person, the evil spider who sits in the center of this nasty web. Until then, it will be a waste of time and energy and futile to think of various permutations concerning this case.'

He turned and began to walk away and they heard him say in a raised voice, ' Advocate Ma'am, Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem.'

Partha cursed angrily, ' This idiot Ravi's influence is getting on my nerves. Like master. Like student. One cannot get a straight answer from them ' and turning to his wife, ' Baby, why what was the reason for him to speak in Kannada or maybe I am wrong and it was really Malayalam.'

Daksha looked at him lovingly, ' Parthi, You know how much I love you, right?'

Parthiban nodded furiously, ' Yes, ducks. I do.'

She looked at him and in a cold, frosty voice, ' But there are times when I feel like beating the cr.p out of you ' and pointing in the direction of Inspector Guna, ' He just quoted in Latin and here you are.....'

Parthiban's face suddenly looked like someone who had swallowed a fly and then embarrassedly shrugging his shoulders, ' Well, ma'am, not everyone can be like Ravi and Guna.'

' I know that Partha but what about all those prayers and sermons that you heard when you accompanied me to church.'

' Well baby, coming to think of that, I was kind of fast asleep with my eyes open.'

Then realizing that Daksha still had her handgun inside her jacket, he smiled his favorite puppy smile and said, ' Come now, you know that you married a bulb with a low IQ. What is the point in flogging a dead horse like me?'

Entia non sunt multiplicanda praeter necessitatem means "Entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity" and it was said by William of Ockham and hence the theory "Occam Razor".

She looked at him and said, ' What it means is that everything has an answer an explanation, and when found turns out to be a simple one and the most easily understood one. I think taking Occams Razor theory and Guna's police theory of " Motive, Means and Opportunity " the answer to the riddle of the missing bodies will be a very simple one.'

Avan, Aval, Adhu 317

At the same time Ravi was exiting the Madurai Government hospital, Madhu found herself being escorted by two senior priests into the Meenakshi Amman temple and through a special entrance that was reserved for temple security purposes.

The man who she had named Spartan walked discreetly a few feet behind her but saw everything and heard everything. Then suddenly, he stepped forward and whispered something to Madhu who looked at him and then slowly looked around and wondered to herself, ' Why is he asking me to wear a mask?', but complied with his request and wrapped the mask around her face and no sooner had she done that she looked up and froze in fear for she caught sight of Meenakshi walking towards her with a man and a couple of constables walking behind her.

The saying " Like a deer caught in the headlights " alludes to the fact that deer freeze with indecision when they get exposed to headlights by a person driving at night. This situation is the leading cause of deer being hit by cars at night.

To be like a deer in headlights means to be very scared, frightened, or surprised that you cannot move or think. Someone who is like a deer in headlights does not know what to say or how to react during a terrifying situation such as stage fright.

Then Spartan moved and covered her with his body and raising his arm pointed to some sculptures and asked the priests which gods they were depicting and just like that Meenakshi passed them by.

Madhu's heartbeat slowly returned to a normal pace and she sneaked an uneasy look at Meenakshi walking and receding into the distance. The panic and trauma of that fateful night 25 years ago flooded her mind and legs and weakened her resolve completely. Taking deep breaths, she told herself that she had to be more careful and decided that henceforth she would not venture out without a face mask to aid in her anonymity.

' Maybe it is best for everyone if I returned to Mumbai and stayed away from Ravi entirely and let things continue as they were. At least that will guarantee some semblance of peace for all of us. I have done what I set out to do and maybe I should quietly leave Madurai without making any more ripples in others' lives. But, surely he will know and realize that it was me who came to him and brought him back to consciousness using the very knowledge that he shared with me. What will Ravi feel and what will he do in the end?'

Without even realizing that she was doing it, Madhu slowly sank into the centuries-old granite platform and sat herself down. Then hearing her aide Spartan's voice, she looked at him with blank and lost eyes.

' Ma'am, the priests are requesting us to stay seated here for a few minutes while they go ahead and prepare for a special pooja to honor your arrival.'

Madhurima looked up at Spartan and said, ' Okay. Thank you ' and then suddenly changing her mind, said, ' No. No. There is no need for all that special pooja and other stuff. All I want is to look at the Goddess and pray for a few minutes. Please, just tell them that.'

Then quickly turning to the priests she spoke in faultless Tamil, ' No need for special pooja and no need for lunch, etc. Please just give me permission to pray in peace for a few minutes and I will be gone from here.'

If she expected her aide to say something in protest to her requests, she was pleasantly disappointed for he said nothing and instead nodded to the priests who said they would return and escort them in a few minutes.

She saw them go and then looked gratefully at Spartan who sat a few feet away from her, staring at the ground, and asked softly, ' Sir, friend, Mr.Spartan, I am in your debt. Thank you for this unexpected gift. I don't know how you managed it but I am guessing that you do get around and have some pretty powerful connections.'

The man smiled humbly and looked at her, ' Ma'am, I am a mere speck when it comes to your power, connections, and reach. I am just a cog in the government machinery.'

A warm and caring smile filled his face and he said, ' Ma'am, all this is happening is because of you and all the goodwill you have earned over the years with the present government and the previous ones and I mean that in a good way. I don't know much about you but what little I know is more than enough for me to form an opinion about you.'

Madhu waved her hand sadly and then blew a spout of air at the strands of hair that had fallen on her right eye and sent them flying back towards her ear and looked at her aide and said, ' All this goodwill is because of my late husband and his legacy.'

The man she called Spartan with a gentle tilt of his head acknowledged her point and replied, ' True but if he was here, even he would have been awestruck with your achievement and would have been singing your praises from dawn to dusk.'

' Sir, you are very kind but, I had a brother and a mentor who guided me through those difficult times, and thanks to him, our company is doing rather well.'

' Well!' Spartan exclaimed, ' surely you jest ma'am. Your company today is worth several thousand crores and what little shares that you have sold after going partly public is as good as gold, I was told by some of the financial experts in our department.'

Madhu looked at him, her eyes full of melancholy, ' Maybe. But what is the point of having all the money in this world, friend? I would give it all up for a quiet and peaceful life here, right here, and spend my time teaching along........'

' Give up all this wealth and power? Why and to whom, ma'am?'

Then realizing that she was confiding too much and that to a stranger she knew nothing about, hurriedly looked away and wiping her eyes, said, ' To my step-daughter, Spartan. All this rightfully belongs to her. I am just a caretaker and a guardian.'

' But, ma'am, what if that lady refuses all this wealth and power? What if her wish is similar to yours?'

Madhu looked at him sharply, ' what do you mean?'

' Meaning, what if she too, your step-daughter wants a quiet and peaceful life and wants nothing to do with this company and her inheritance?'

' I don't know the answer to that question, Spartan. But, you are right for at some point in the near future, I will have to sit down and have a long and serious talk with Gayatri about her future.'

' Gayatri. Is that your stepdaughter's name?'

Spartan smiled and said softly, ' Gayatri is one of the names of Shakti Amman who is worshipped as Meenakshi Amman right here in this temple.'

Avan, Aval, Adhu 318

“Prayer is not asking. It is a longing of the soul. It is daily admission of one's weakness. It is better in prayer to have a heart without words than words without a heart.” Mahatma Gandhi

The temple priest came out of the inner sanctum with the traditional pooja plate laden with the necessary pooja stuff, and Madhu gently touched it and asked him if he could whisper a few names while doing the pooja.

' Yes. Please tell me their names.'

' Gayatri, Ravi, and all life in this world.'

The priest smiled and went inside and after a quick chant, broke a coconut and placed it on the plate and then lit a piece of camphor and slowly raised it towards Goddess Meenakshi's face, and Madhurima opened her eyes and looked directly into her big fish shape eyes, and whispered her prayers, ' Mother. You know, have known what is in my heart. All I want is for Gayatri and Ravi to be safe and live a life full of peace and good health. Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu.'

The priest came out and after giving her and her aide the prasadam, suddenly stared at Madhu and then quickly went back into the sanctum sanctorum and came back with a small sealed packet and offered it to her.

She looked at it and that at the priest for she was not sure what it was and why he was offering it to him.

' Please take it and open it when your heart tells you that it is time ' he said and when Madhu asked him what the packet was, the priest looked at her, ' I have been a priest here for more than 25 years now. So, please trust me and have faith in God and take this for it will come in handy and will serve its purpose when you need it. Trust me.'

Madhu thanked him and looked at her aide Spartan as if she wanted a final confirmation and he nodded and told her it was okay to accept it.

The priest refused to take any money and politely told her to put it in the hundi instead and pointedly looked at the clock that informed them that it was nearly 1.00 pm.

' Even the Gods and Goddesses need some rest for they have been awake from early morning' the priest joked casually, and Madhu taking the hint thanked him again and both she and Spartan slowly walked back to where he had parked their vehicle.

Once they were in the car, he asked her, ' Where to now?'

Madhu asked him if he was feeling hungry and Spartan casually shrugged his shoulder, ' Yes but food can wait. I have kind of gotten used to skipping meals and sometimes I have gone an entire day without eating anything.'

Smiling casually, ' But that's me, ma'am.'

' You are right when you say that you are used to it. I am sorry but I am not. I eat very little but do it on time.'

She looked out through the window and said, ' This area looks a bit crowded. Maybe, we can stop somewhere on the way to Kumarapalayam.'

' So, that's where we are heading to now?'

' Yes. If it is okay with you.'

He smiled and said, ' Ma'am, I am at your service. So, tell me where you need to go and I will take you there.''

Madhu thanked him and then suddenly her eyes grew large with fear and she said in a sad voice, ' No, Spartan. I have changed my mind about going to Kumarapalayam.'

' Okay, ma'am ' Then he looked at her and said, ' I know I am just your aide and here to serve you for a day or two. But, if you feel the need to talk, please feel free to treat me like your friend and brother.'

Madhu chuckled and said, 'Okay. But, my kid brother, for you are a lot younger than me.'

She tried to look into his eyes but finding it difficult to do so, turned her sight towards the temple gate and said, ' Maybe I am not ready or maybe I am just scared of what might happen or how I will be received by...' and taking a deep breath, Madhu turned and looked deep into Spartan's eyes and said, ' It's been a long time. A very long time.'

Her eyes with their tears were like lotus flowers heavy with dew drops and wiping them, she said, ' There is a place. A quiet place that was my favorite spot in Kumarapalayam. It is near an old and broken down Shiva temple, just a km outside the village.'

She looked at him with yearning eyes and said, ' I need to go there. I have to go there for my heart tells me that it is the right thing to do. Please, Spartan, can you take me there?'

Avan, Aval, Adhu 319

The Toyota Fortuner cut through the Madurai traffic with ease like a hot knife slicing through butter. If in this case, the heavy traffic was butter, then the Ruling party's flag and the familiar vehicle of MLA Dharmalinga Thevar were the knives.

He observed loudly, ' Ravi Iyaa, I have known you all my life and from the time you were born. I knew that there was something special about you the moment I took you and cradled you in my arms.'

Ravi smiled and said, ' Uncle, you and amma have always been close and whatever you felt was because of the close bond between both of you. Then you have your own personality and large heart that always sees only the good in other people and refuses to see the bad in them.'

' Maybe Ravi sir but I know what I felt and my heart never lies and has never failed me.'

Rasaathi could not help herself and fired her shots. ' Dharma, my dear brother. Could you kindly take your time and remember and then share with us what you felt when Meenakshi was born and when you cradled her in your arms.'

Appalled and repelled by her thoughts, Ravi glared at her and gently scolded her in his own way. ' Very good mother. Keep it up for you are really making me proud by revealing this new side of yours that you had kept hidden from me and the others.'

Glaring angrily at Ravi, ' Hidden? The synonyms for that word that you just used to accuse your mother include, concealed secret, covered, camouflaged, disguised, and masked. I am sorry but from, when has, being honest and frank with one's opinions, become a folly.'

Turning her face she wiped her eyes angrily, ' Everyone has a right to live the way they want to and express their thoughts freely and without the fear of being judged harshly. Everyone has the right to love and worry and fight for their loved ones.'

Turning to Ravi, ' Learned sir, that is exactly what I am doing right now. I am a mother fighting for her son's life and his future.'

Ravi looked at her and asked softly, ' At what cost, mother? You say you are fighting for your son's life but at the same time, your brother, my uncle is fighting for his only daughter and mother, he is fighting for you and me too. So, please choose your words carefully for once they are said, they remain forever.'

Dharmalinga Thevar's voice did not reveal any pain or remorse that he might have felt ( must have felt ) when he answered Rasaathi Ammal's questions.

' This might shock you, Rasaathi, but I felt the same emotion and feeling that I felt for Ravi when I held Meenakshi in my arms. There is not the slightest doubt in my mind when I state that she would have gone to do wonders with her life. But for her obsessions, compulsions, and mental disorders.'

His uncle's honesty left Ravi totally moved and leaning forward, he placed a hand on Dharmalinga Thevar's shoulder and said, ' I am the reason for all this. Sometimes, I wish I had not been born at all for that would have changed the fate of so many lives including Meenakshi's and...'

' No. Please don't say that and please don't try and shift the blame on yourself when the real culprit is Meenakshi and her obsession with you.

Rasaathi Ammal glanced at her son, ' You did not complete the sentence and you left your thoughts unsaid. It is Gayatri? Say it, Ravi. Say her name and also think about her and what you are going to do over the next few days.'

Shaking her head, ' Poor woman, I wonder how she is coping with her pain and what she is doing right now.'

Sighing tiredly, Ravi told his mother that he would reach out to her. ' I think I will wait a few days before I do that. Right now, I am sure she will be blaming herself for what happened to me. At this point, it is best that she is left alone to process her thoughts and sort out her life in her own way.'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDu3PHeUbO4

Avan, Aval, Adhu 320

Nirmal Gupta's relief on hearing Gayatri's voice vanished the moment Gayatri had called and informed him that she was coming to Delhi to meet him. Even though he had been worried about her and what she was going through, he had elected to remain silent for from the mere tone of her voice, he had understood that something was terribly wrong and that she was in great pain and mental turmoil and that any words from him would only serve to upset her even more and push her away from sanity. So, he told her cheerfully that he would wait for her arrival and was eager to see her again after such a long time.

Nirmal Gupta had been there right next to Prem when she had been brought out of the delivery room and had been there when his best friend was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He remembered that sad and heart-breaking moment when he had promised his late friend to watch over Gayatri and Madhu after he was gone and no matter what the circumstance.

Prem had looked at him with eyes sunk deep in their sockets, ' Nirmal, Dost, I am not worried about Madhurima for she is indestructible like our Bhoomi Mata. Strong and persevering and a fighter who never gives up. Never. I am more worried about Gayatri and the choices she makes when she is in a rampaging mood.'

Coughing tiredly, ' Don't get me wrong for I am not letting my child down. It's just that she does not stop and think about the consequences and the fallout that come from her own making. All she needs during those dangerous moments are a steady, guiding hand, calm words, and a person to talk to.'

Nirmal Gupta smiled, and observed, ' Prem, it's so funny that you are asking me to do the same thing that I did to you when you began your business and started to expand it. OMG! So many disasters were averted in the nick of time by me stopping you and literally begging you to take control of your anger. She is your blood and your soul. So, obviously, she is like you in her behavior.'

' No, Nirmal. You are mistaken if you think I and Gayatri are the same. I am sorry. She is far more intelligent and hardworking than me and she is far more bolder and aggressive than me. Honestly speaking, I think she is ten times than what I was in my heydays and I mean it in the right way ', then lowering his voice, he turned away ' and said, ' and also in a sad way.'

He tried to speak more but was unable to do so for he soon ran out of breath and raising his hand indicated to Nirmal Gupta that he would be okay in a few minutes.

Nirmal had taken his hand in his and gripped it tenderly, ' Prem, do you remember those times when I used to be scared of death and suffer panic attacks whenever I saw a victim that had been taken by death.'

Prem tried and could only muster a slight smile and a blink of his eyes and Gupta who by now had understood his friend's cues and signals continued on.

' It was not just death but also fear of physical pain that used to scare me to no end. I used to go to extreme levels to protect myself and everyone around me ' and looking at Prem, ' you included used to make fun of me.'

With his eyes brimming with tears of grief, ' I realize now that there is a far worse kind of pain than what we experience physically. I realize now that death is the end and that it comes to all of us and yet there is a process of dying apart from one's own final demise and it is a process that involves dying again and again.'

Kissing his friend's hand, ' Seeing you suffer and seeing you slowly slipping away is more painful than anything I have experienced before. I saw my parents remove the masks of life that they had been wearing and slip into their death masks and leave me one after the other. I sat in the hospital and saw them take their final gasps of breaths. It hurt and hurt badly. But nothing compared to what I am feeling right now.'

Tears spouted like shiny new diamonds in Prem's dying eyes adding a new sparkle but a sad one at that and they added luster to his listless and dying eyes.

Nirmal Gupta gently wiped the tears away from his friend's eyes and said, ' My life for your life. My life for whatever you want from me. I promise I will watch over both of them like my own children and will not let any harm come to them.'

He stood staring sadly at the world outside through the large windows of his residence in Jor Bagh, Delhi, and looked up hearing a distant thunderclap. Only now did he notice that dark clouds had gathered all over the city and they appeared to him as if they were singing a duet and dancing the tango and then they let loose a sudden downpour of rain drops.

Guptaji, smiled at the clouds, ' Prem, my dear one, are you crying and shedding tears of joy sensing your daughter's arrival.'

He looked out and spotting a cab pulling up near the gates, whispered, ' The prodigal daughter returns.'

Music. Assorted instruments come together in harmony and in conduct and composed by their creator and flow into our senses as music.

Some pieces are uplifting and reveal a new dimension of life while some pieces tug and tear at your soul and make you cry.

Music along with books are my life companions and along with them, I swim through life and face all its travails.

Music calms me as a soothing balm and music tears open healing wounds revealing the infections inside my festering wounds.

Music along with the words of my favorite writer Kannadasan lull me to sleep and many times, old classics from both Tamil and Hindi have been the Bodhi trees that have opened my eyes.

Sometimes, nay, many a time, I find myself singing along with the song and becoming the song and forgetting the world around me because I am lost having been transported to a different world.

There have been times when I have stood facing the camera acting, performing in this world as Satish and at the same time standing in another world as another Satish listening, to them pieces of music that speak and sing their creator's emotions.

I know then, that I am not just listening to the music or words of a song, but that I have become that song itself, feeling every note rise and fall with every rise and fall of my chest and with every beat of my heart.

Here are a few of my favorite pieces of music and songs that I listen to often and when I am hunched over my keyboard, writing prose and singing poems through prose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gw9fKuymA0I&t=2671s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0596L_5n-S4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBOa-2b4uQQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rs5bc_P1kKo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xg8bS9k1FA0&t=163s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBca3xf-j3o

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ty7Rig0LeQ&list=PLiuLHa5j5z_LEQPkDoaRJDDAbxH12mDlu&index=10

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uktj2MYSsaU&list=PLiuLHa5j5z_LEQPkDoaRJDDAbxH12mDlu&index=36