My theory on Meethi's entry!!

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#11

Regarding taking care of diya I think what he shows us gratitude ..he told many times u do so much for me what I do is little

He is not a bad guy who just forgets and has zero gratitude

He is a good guy he has gratitude he does gratitude in ways he is capable of i.e for that he would not sacrifice any thing

For eg sending diya dad to London for the money he has its pennies for him he need not sacrifice any thing to do that so he does that

And that court scene ..yes he is ready for a fee beatings to take for diya ..here also he is not sacrificing any thing ..plan is Abhay beats him for that evidence and ratan will give it so no question of murder also court case is on Abhay is not a fool to murder ratan at that point and get caught easily by judge .so max probability is beatings for ratan ..zero risk for life ..he need not sacrifice so he did it

But in case of marriage he needs to sacrifice his 10 or 15 yrs of freedom ..he once said to diya he will marry around 35 ..I guess that number bcos what he told is after diya gets old he will get married

He is not ready to sacrifice so he is divorcing her i..but he has guilt ..so he is compensating that guilt in false hope that diya would get best guy if he divorces her ..if he won't think like that he can't divorce her ..so he tuned his mind to think like that ..again he did that bcos he is selfish i.e he can't adapt himself for diya

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foresight

@foresight

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#12

Originally posted by: VARUNI2014
Regarding taking care of diya I think what he shows us gratitude ..he told many times u do so much for me what I do is little
He is not a bad guy who just forgets and has zero gratitude
He is a good guy he has gratitude he does gratitude in ways he is capable of i.e for that he would not sacrifice any thing

For eg sending diya dad to London for the money he has its pennies for him he need not sacrifice any thing to do that so he does that

And that court scene ..yes he is ready for a fee beatings to take for diya ..here also he is not sacrificing any thing ..plan is Abhay beats him for that evidence and ratan will give it so no question of murder also court case is on Abhay is not a fool to murder ratan at that point and get caught easily by judge .so max probability is beatings for ratan ..zero risk for life ..he need not sacrifice so he did it

But in case of marriage he needs to sacrifice his 10 or 15 yrs of freedom ..he once said to diya he will marry around 35 ..I guess that number bcos what he told is after diya gets old he will get married

He is not ready to sacrifice so he is divorcing her i..but he has guilt ..so he is compensating that guilt in false hope that diya would get best guy if he divorces her ..if he won't think like that he can't divorce her ..so he tuned his mind to think like that ..again he did that bcos he is selfish i.e he can't adapt himself for diya

what does adaptation mean to you? pretending to love her? is that what this supposed sacrifice of 10-15 odd years mean?

will diya be happy knowing that he doesnt love her but is adapting/sacrifying to be with her for her sake? how is that going to help the relationship? and keep the marraige going? the reality is that in that situation diya is likely to be the one freeing him of the relation herself anyway.

he cares for her right now for more than gratitude reasons. he didnt need to send her father abroad...he didnt even tell her about it. he couldnt even think about using his engagement ring for his plan with CT because he values everything associated with her so much.

and what freedom are you talking about? have you in any time recently seen him even worry about it? the guy who wasn't interested in business and wanted adventure is promising diya that he will take the legacy that she has built so well forward. that doesnt talk about someone who is bothered about freedom. thinking diya's locket will be empty and feeling bad about it wasn't thinking about his freedom.

what he has told diya was that at 35 he will think about marriage...but wont marry. and yet you are forgetting this is the same guy who screamed out in the court diya is his wife and abhay better not try to hurt her

Edited by foresight - 7 years ago

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#13

He is selfish adaptiblity does not mean pretending adaptability means adjusting to other person wishes here diya wish is to stay in marriage and give her a chance

Being in Love is an overrated thing that's why I mentioned marriages in USA love is there but failures they r in love ..but they don't love the other person

Many don't understand what love is .for me love means adaptability and sacrifice

Even USA many feel being in love is love ..it's not true

Falling in love or bring in love s entirely different from loving some one

When u rvin love u always want to be with that person and do what the other person wants and certain chemical released in u r brain that will keep u on high it's scientifically proven

But when u love a person no such reactions all u do us adaptability and sacrifice ..for eg u r parents love you as simple as that they adapt to u r needs they sacrifice

Successful marriages all end up not being in love but in loving that person

So u can't get forced love li u can't love just like that us false ..just get in to a relationship with being unselfish and u end up loving the other person provided the other person is not core selfish ..other person also needs to show some adaptability

Dora is not a love marriage i.e not being in love marriage ..but if ratan is a little bit mature and unselfish it would have worked since we know diya is unselfish ..but he won't give it a chance bcos he is selfish

I dont see himself changing any thing since he came from London he is the same selfish guy he has gratitude back then and even now .

What I intended to say is those USA being in love marriages r big flops bcos they all r selfish and zero adaptability

So ratan has no reason to divorce diya bcos he is not in love ..he is selfish so he is divorcing as simple as that

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foresight

@foresight

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#14

Originally posted by: VARUNI2014
He is selfish adaptiblity does not mean pretending adaptability means adjusting to other person wishes here diya wish is to stay in marriage and give her a chance
Being in Love is an overrated thing that's why I mentioned marriages in USA love is there but failures they r in love ..but they don't love the other person

Many don't understand what love is .for me love means adaptability and sacrifice
Even USA many feel being in love is love ..it's not true

Falling in love or bring in love s entirely different from loving some one

When u rvin love u always want to be with that person and do what the other person wants and certain chemical released in u r brain that will keep u on high it's scientifically proven

But when u love a person no such reactions all u do us adaptability and sacrifice ..for eg u r parents love you as simple as that they adapt to u r needs they sacrifice

Successful marriages all end up not being in love but in loving that person

So u can't get forced love li u can't love just like that us false ..just get in to a relationship with being unselfish and u end up loving the other person provided the other person is not core selfish ..other person also needs to show some adaptability

Dora is not a love marriage i.e not being in love marriage ..but if ratan is a little bit mature and unselfish it would have worked since we know diya is unselfish ..but he won't give it a chance bcos he is selfish

I dont see himself changing any thing since he came from London he is the same selfish guy he has gratitude back then and even now .

What I intended to say is those USA being in love marriages r big flops bcos they all r selfish and zero adaptability

So ratan has no reason to divorce diya bcos he is not in love ..he is selfish so he is divorcing as simple as that

being in love isn't overrated. the marriages..even arranged ones that truely thrive (not for show off to the world or staying together for societal pressures or till their kids get marriages), but because warmth exists between them, do so because their is love between the two people along with understanding, care and respect. the ones who dont have this love in them, have are being together physically when mentally they are already cut off from each other. i have seen both and it isn't hard to spot which one is which usually.

as for why marriages fail, no two marraige failures are the same. be it in US or in India. but if you want to tag one thing then it is because they never cared about the other person to put their happiness ahead of their own. they never cared what the other person deserves and only about what they are getting out of the relationship.

comparing failed marriages in US to a fictional couple firstly is a bit too much. but even then if the US folks in those marriages actually bothered about caring about the other person's happiness, then the depression rates in US would have definitely been better. there would also have been lesser cases of people ending up in AAA

what i can say though is that even in US, the marriages that do survive, do so because love is alive in them.

Edited by foresight - 7 years ago

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#15

He screamed bcos he is immature on one hand he screams diya us his wife does he know the meaning of wife ..

This is the same immaturity that made him married to diya no one forced him at gunpoint but he married he promised in mandap that he won't break marriage but he is doing it so here it's heights of immaturity

He does not know the meaning of wife not the holy promises that he made in mandap he just marriages just like that in stupid emotion ..just like that in stupid emotion he screams wife word ..no value for what marriage is not what wife us

If u think adaptability is forced feelings sorry ..it's not the case

..adaptability and sacrifice that's what love is ..not screaming u r my wife not marrying in emotion nor experiencing that high feeling in brain ..it's not love

If feeling high in brain and chemicals released and that's make u r heart jumpy and restless if that's what love is all marriages in USA will be successful as all feel that before so called love marriages there ..

But why I mentioned USA is there every one is so individualistic and selfish ..that's why failure in marriage compared to them even indian NRI bormn and bought up in USA are less selfish and more adaptable so less divorces

What I mean to say is adaptabilitg and sacrifice is what true love is ..

Yes being in love u can't control ..i.e h can't control with whom u get that emotion ..but what I say is that emotion is not at all important and u can love a person with out being in love and that's called true love and that requires unselfishness and adaptability ..

Regarding ratan being a changed man .come on again words i.e emotional words r not important ..like his marriage and my patni words ..deeds r important

.see that vendors thing ..even that small problem he left on Ayush and skipped so what kind of responsibility he takes in business god knows ..he is not patient enough to solve the vendors thing ..

Regarding Isha marriage she is just a widow ..so marrying a widow is no big deal and reg Arpita we don't know which kind of loafer she married .haha

So diya chances of getting the best man is still one percent

Being a widow is not a disrespectful thing ..every one sympathised them but being a pehredar cancelling marriage at mandap and again divorce is disrespectful so still one percent chance

It does not matter what diya thinks about

Society ..if u r unselfish u think about what are her chances for happiness ..

If ratan is being unable to be in love with diya that's no problem at all still he can love diya as years go by and give her happiness as true happiness is not being in love but loving the other person

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#16

Marriages that survive in USA survived bcos of adaptability and being unselfish it's not bcos whether they r being in love or not ..

I used to work in my uncle doctor office in summer when I was in USA there I got a chance to meet so many elder people i.e in their eighties there what they say is these younger generation failed marriages is bcos they r too selfish

.simple word they said ..yes it's true can u believe tl 1950 divorce rate in USA was below five percent ..

Being in love was back then and even now but difference is selfishness and that brings high rate of individuality and that results in failure if marruage bcos u r unable to love any person

Even now twenty five percent success full marriages means they end up loving the other person bcos they r unselfish and adapt themselves

Being in love is irrelevant for marriage and u r saying ratan decision divorce us right bcos he is not in love with diya that's what I contradict and that's why I gave u USA eg

Ratan is a selfish guy he can't sacrifice or adapt he knows it himself and divorcing her that's why he calls himself bad guy

He is not divorcing her bcos he is unable to being in love nor he is keeping her on a pedestal ..if that's so he won't tell himself as bad

Being not in love is not bad not respecting the other person is bad not caring deeply about the other person is bad

What script writers intended to say is he knows he is selfish and he can't sacrifice he knows about it and so he calls himself bad ..

He is not taking any steps to change hmsekf regarding being unselfish ..so he is basically selfish and he is divorcing her ..

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#17

Replace not with nor in my above post

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foresight

@foresight

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#18

every one has their own definition of love. if sacrifice and adjustement is true love for you, fine.

but then you are expecting ratan to be in love/love diya now, when you are saying he has to sacrifice/adjust for her. and you are calling him selfish because he is not in love with her.

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#19

Ratan sending diya dad to London is bcos of gratitude it's not bcos if deep care

He dies not care about her deeply all those little things he did London court thing is bcos of gratitude

If he had deeply cared he would have ended up loving diya ..again I tell it's not ended up being in love ..

Being in love and loving the other person is entirely different ..

Ratan never cared deeply about her so divorcing her thinking about her imagined happiness ..

I don't know why he can't love diya if he is unselfish and adaptable ..

Being not in love with diya yes it's not in his hands and it's highly irrelevant in any relation ..

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VARUNI2014

@VARUNI2014

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#20

True happibessi u can give to the other person is loving that person and it's not being in love

U can only love if u r unselfish and adaptable .being in love is not in u r hands but loving the other person is entirely in u r hands and u can do it if u r unselfish and adaptable

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