Navarasas || Bhayanaka- PART 2 UPDATED (18/5) - Page 8

Originally posted by: chotidesi

WL, I've told you that you're a fantastic writer.

And you truly proved it today.

I love your work. Even though I've only read two pieces, it's enough to tell me that you, my dear, are someday, going to be famous and I will be waiting in line for your autograph. Pakka.

For me, the strongest part of this beautiful piece of work was the fact that you've turned Paro into a resolute, determined woman- she is willing to admit that she's afraid, terrified. But that doesn't mean she can't fight it.

She stands there and takes his abuse and his kindness in the first portion. She's terrified of him because of his mood swings, the way he throws her up against a wall and then feeds her with tenderness. Then in the second part, she's able to handle his mood swings. She recognizes his anger and fights back, but then when he's kind to her, she accepts it- along with the desire, and she realizes that this time, the anger is not at her but for her. If that makes any sense. Then finally- she doesn't fear his anger anymore. She fears his love- because she knows that it'll be stronger than his anger, and that it won't let go.

God, I love you. You're the best- I couldn't have asked for a better person to work with, and I couldn't be more humbled to have preceded your work. Here's to many more, Baisa!

Originally posted by: curledup

FOURTH ONG


- Edit: sorry it was a long lunch

I have no idea and I genuinely have no idea why I really like this line ' the Major would be the latest Ranawat man to be wedded.' Maybe it's the wording or the layout I have no clue okay *shrugs shoulders* but I suppose it's all these tiny pieces that make the whole puzzle. The emphasis on eyes and their connection is more than marvellous, this understanding that you've shown in Paro is way more than marvellous.

The previous piece put emphasis on Rudra and this second piece compliments it perfectly, this understanding that Paro has of Rudra is more more than marvellous! She knows his need for her and sees the fear because it was once within her, throughout the piece you strengthened her resolve and her love for him, what was once need became love and as you made her stronger the smile on my face became wider.

The final paragraph was really the nail on the head sorta thing, sharp and too the point- tied every emotion in. We saw a Paro that I really want to see on the show, that level of maturity I am yet to see from Gautum but you have done is perfectly here.


I loved it WL. You and Choti have done such a fantastic job, a super well done and proud smile :D together it's a beautiful symphony of the emotion!

-Asho

Originally posted by: hkdrama

Amazing 👏
I love how you matched the storyline with Chotidesi's version. We got to read HIS and HER POV.

You guys are amazingly talented...as good as the published authors :-)

Originally posted by: neet2407

Hello White-Lies

another wonderful author I stalk and who is part of the Navarasas series!

I was waiting for Paro's point of view and you wrote it beautifully

Firstly - her first fear when she was in danger and how Rudra saved her and quelled the fear - then the wedding with Varun - where he was the opposite and became the jallad but still did not pull the trigger so saved her, then the mehndhi fear - when he was putting pressure on her and the thought that he might end up married to him - he saved her again, then the haldi - the monet things changed - the fear of her burning skin again Rudra saved her and finally the fear from her knowledge of Rudra and Laila's relationship - did Laila deserve him more? her fear of leaving him through her promise to Bholenath - this time her love for Rudra saved her as she realised he only wanted her and she only wanted him and it was time to fight not flight - beautifully expressed!

Originally posted by: JJKKL

ChotiDesi and White-Lies,

Did you guys really plan it this way ? To address the fear from her and his POVs ?

If yes, great strategy.
If no, great destiny.

Either way - we the readers are a blessed lot.

To be able to read such poetry in prose (if there is any such thing)

How do you guys manage to write down the inner thoughts so well ? Here is a toast to you both

Originally posted by: _SenbonZakura_

I am cursing each minute that I have to delay reading the two OSs... I am drowning in work. But I promise to read as soon as possible.

Just resing.

Forgive me, Choti-si and White-sa!

Unres.

Choti-si: Wow. I mean, seriously. That nerve wracking, bone chilling feeling was so THERE. I don't even know what to say to that. The desperate NEED of Rudra to hold on to her. And the fear... the FEAR. Wow!!

Okay, that is a weird comment. But really, I have no words to say. Just that you rocked Bhayanaka! And its amazeballs ekdum!!

White-sa: How did you do it?? How did you manage to bring out the stages of Paro's fear so brilliantly? Of how she overcame it? Of how her fear of fear itself vanished? This piece had so much depth to it!

Choti-si & White-sa, I really just have to mention the haldi scene that both of you wrote.. Reading it, was almost like watching it from both Paro and Rudra's eyes... And that feeling was really like nothing else!

Cheers to both of you!

Bhayanaka was awesome!

Originally posted by: shona.

Finally read both stories

Wow honestly i am speechless at the amazing writers on this forum and also now scared to post whatever i'll have when it's my turn!

Firstly Choti you captured Rudra and his emotions with such perfect precision, along with your words I could imagine Ashish's expressions with ease. You're very gifted with words, you paint a picture so beautifully, left me wanting to read more

White Lies I loved the way you used fear as being the emotion that brings out the fight in Paro and the change in Paro's fear...first it was Rudra now its the fear of losing him. Paro is so hard to capture in words but you did it brilliantly. After reading this I really hope Paro takes this route and fights for Rudra rather than leave him

Originally posted by: -Zara-

Oh man! The second parter truly complementary for the first part.

My favourite part has to be when Paro gained that inner power inside her due to her fear. I would love to see this on screen, but it seems Paro is the sacraficial type.😭

But this week end has been totally superb with the emotion of fear. THANK YOU!👏

x

Originally posted by: --POV--

It seemed like a continuation but was distinctive.

Loved the emotions portrayed; stayed true to Paro's character. Hope the track too brings in her thought process 👏👏👏