Casa 50B on 146 Most links on Page 1) - Page 35

Created

Last reply

Replies

1k

Views

273.4k

Users

47

Likes

3.5k

Frequent Posters

saaaz thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
Main aayeee mai aayeee....

Ayoo Ad...I so wanted to be the first one to comment...but yeh phooti office aur kaam se fursat abh jaake mili hai....

Your lines touch me everytime...the little moments you weave between shanak within your story become independent stories of their own..

Thank you for making me relive one of my most personal and memorable story of my life through your shanak.....and thank you and Krishna for best wishes for my friend...I am constantly doing the Paula on her...so hopefully she shall get her Shaan too...

Thanks Ad...and what can I say about your writing that has not already been said...?

PS: The song is and shall remain one of my all time favorite songs....its lyrics touch you no matter what stage of life you are going through...It tells you to move on and yet hold on....

Udte Pairo Ke Tale Jab Behtee Hain Zameen
Mud Ke Humne Koyee Manjil Dekhee Hee Nahee
Raat Din Raahon Pe Hum Shaama-o-sahar Karte Hai

Raah pe Rehte hai....Yaadon pe basar karte hai...
Kush Raho..............Aile watan...Hum Tho Safar Karte Hain.....
Edited by saaaz - 14 years ago
aditee thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 14 years ago
Saaz
Thank you very much for the note yaar
It means a lot to me
I was quite squeamish at first trying to fictionalize a real life tragedy like that!
I am glad you dont think its disrespectful or flippant.
I wish her all the very best in finding love and in making happy memories
We all have a Paula in us, esp if we are a romantic at heart
Good luck in playing that role to the fullest
Thanks for reading and appreciating
It means the world to me.
Love
A
Edited by aditee - 14 years ago
Roshni_M thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
wow.............. that was sooooooo nice............... simple and cute...........
loved it............
continue soon...........
jparker thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
Aditee... am reading.. holding my heart now.. Each time you update I think today will be something else.. But am always not prepared with my racing heart. Their eye locks will cease the beating of my heart for sure.
Such a nice way to fiction a memory.. Very nice aditee... is not easy. But it was done very nicely...
The cat and mouse now getting on a strange friendly foothold.. Hmmm... yes the green getting a bit light in shade but very much prevalent there.. as can feel the racing of her heart.. can hear it thudding. gosh I am sure he can too...
And the last memorable moment for them both.. sorry for the shirt and sorry for your cheek in bold blue.... sends my heart racing...😍 Of course can't forget the light clasping of her palm... and neither her tripping...
Great updates again aditee...👏👏 So now what!! We did progress from Mr. Gujral to Shantanu... 😳
k.krithika thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 14 years ago
Hi Aditee
Sorry for posting late was busy with work this week finally completed reading last few parts Awesome updates 👏 👏
Loved it 😊
U write so well its simply amazing to read ur writing
Enjoyed reading every part 😊
Beautifully written
Shaan and Khanak's feelings their emotions were described so well
Thanks a lot
Keep Writing 😊
aditee thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 14 years ago

PART 17 A

Thursday evening

She had called him twice on Tuesday evening and once on Wednesday to talk about work of course. He hadn't bothered to return her calls. She had been at her office both days. Part of her had wanted to find out where he was so she had made an appearance late Thursday afternoon at his. Still no sign of him.

She wore a pink chikan suit with an orange dupatta with pink embroidery around the mirrorwork

The core team had been surprised to see her there. She had somehow managed to come up with an explanation for why she had shown up unannounced. Ram was already in the meeting. She had later told him that she had to meet with people on Shantanu's team.

He hadn't asked anything further. He realized she knew what she was doing. Paula and her had a lunch date on Sunday so that good did come out of her sudden Ajmera Corp Office appearance

Her phone rings, she recognizes the number though its not been stored with a name in the phone book

She disconnects it.

She meets with Nivs for an hour and towards the end of it the phone rings again

Nivs: Do you want to get that?

Khanak: Nope! (answers and disconnects quickly)

Goes back to their calculations on paper

Most people start leaving for the day, its past 7 PM. She starts packing her stuff from the conference room and then Niv's cube.

Her phone rings when she is in the empty conference room.

Busy gathering her files'''''''''' she answers it

Shaan: What is going on Khanak? (ferocious)

Khanak shocked to hear that voice

Khanak: Mujhe aapse koi baat nahi karni

Shaan: What? Kyon?

Khanak: I am heading home right now. Meri train miss ho jaayegi, I will call you later

Shaan: Don't disconnect! Khanak''.. please

Khanak: Did u have something to say?

Shaan: Nahi galti se dial kar diya tha

Khanak: Great! Then I can just

Shaan: Khanak! Will you stop it?

Khanak: I really have to go''

Shaan:Tumne mera phone kyon kata?

Khanak: Ive been trying to reach you since Tuesday, I even sent Outlook meeting invites. Not one response!

Shaan: Did you call me too?

Khanak: What is that supposed to mean?

Shaan: Ha! Finally''' mujhe bolne ka mauka dogi?

Khanak: hmm

Shaan: Thank you! I ve been busy

Khanak: I thought so! (sarcastic) It couldn't have been anything else

Shaan: Khanak

Khanak: Nevermind''.

Shaan: Ive been shuttling between the site and regional office and the lawyer's. Haven't had a chance to return too many calls or sleep much. Its been brutal'''.. I am sorry Khanak (softly)

Khanak: Ummm

Shaan: I was in meetings 12-14 hours a day, the rest I was too busy sorting things out for those Tarang design plans

Khanak: I only wanted to talk abt work

Shaan smiles

Shaan: Fair enough, go ahead (clears his throat to hide his amusement)

Khanak: BMC has approved two designs and I wanted to review some changes we talked abt..

Shaan: Kab? I can be at Prabha Devi tomm I believe (checking his PC, as she hears keys being tapped)

Khanak: I am here TODAY (you aren't) I cant be tomm (sulking)

Shaan: Arent you supposed to be at Prabhadevi every day?

Khanak: No this week I wasn't planning to I was at my office Tuesday and Wed''. I came here today to''(see you)

Shaan: Thanks

Khanak: I am already working on Sat this week. That leaves Sunday and I don't want to talk with you about ceiling height and iron trusses on a Sunday morning. I would rather do laundry. (defiant)

Shaan: Khanak If we were together on a Sunday morning the last thing we would be doing is talking about ceiling height or wall thickness and you will definitely not be doing laundry! (softly)😳😳😳

Khanak: Shantanu!

Pause!

Shaan: OK rule number one for our fights. If you want to show me how upset you are with me never say my name like that. It comes out as a caress and not as a reprimand (mocks)

Khanak: I have a better idea

Shaan: What

Khanak: I don't plan to say your name ever.

Both know its not the truth

Khanak: Its due Monday and I refuse to work on Sunday.

Shaan: Hmm''' what time on Monday is it due?

Khanak: 5 I think

Shaan: Do you want to send it to me I can take care of it

Khanak (offended) Oh! So the employee of the architectural firm you hired is incapable of delivering on time so the design engineer doubles up as an architect?

Shaan: Is that what you think I am trying to do? (furious)

Khanak: Yes!

Shaan: I have nothing to say then. We will just have to complete it later in the week. (cold)

Khanak: Fine

Shaan: Fine!

Click!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PART 17 B

Saturday evening

Ziya at Oberoi Towers

Khanak waited and ..............waited.............. Drawing a water slide design with her fork on the white linen table cloth. Sitar played softly in the background. She wore a saree as her Bai had said "it was the right thing to wear". It was a emerald green crepe chiffon with wavy designs in pink. She really didn't want to meet a "prospective husband" after working all day on Saturday

But her Aada had called in the morning informing about Nirav Saraf. He was the guy who owned a franchise of some sort in Ahmedabad. She didn't want to return to Ahmedabad. Sooraj's memories were the only inviting thing about that place besides her parents.

Sooraj......................why did you have to go?

"I would have never left Ahmedabad, no relocating to Mumbai, no living in Kalyan the first couple months''. Ritu............... her work, Casa and Shantanu.

He was polite and kind to her on Monday. He seemed articulate, thoughtful and intelligent. He had given up his evening with Mahi (?) to have give her a ride home. He steered the car with his right hand, the left tapped the gear rhythmically. There was a complicated camera lying in the back seat, out of its case. She had spilled all that Coke on him and on the seat. He had laughed it off Sooraj would have been a little upset? At least at first? He was so meticulous, he really took care of his things. All his shirts were as good as new even after he wore them for years.

Shantanu seemed a bit careless, unmindful? Easy? NOW she knew what his jaw must feel like. The next couple days when ever she stepped out on the hallway, she heard that rasp. He was chivalrous, protective, he made sure she was inside her house before he took off.

He didn't seem curious about her at all though. Maybe he is unconcerned? I am just a coworker?

He only ate meat though''.. how would I introduce him to Aada and Bai? They didn't even speak much English. He wouldn't be able to say much at all to them. He was not of the same caste either. Was he a Punjabi? She wondered'''..

Well''. There wasn't much possibility that he would every visit her again, leave alone visit her when her parents were in Mumbai so the introductions were unnecessary. She noticed when he accepted change in return he never counted the money, he just trusted it to be correct? Or he had so much of it that it did not matter if it was inaccurate?

He had said he would call her after that first conversation but hadn't called. Busy at work or outside of it. She now knew how the "South Mumbai" types lived their life. She could tell Ritu that sometime. Or reminisce when she returned to Ahmedabad''''.. Ritu had been so busy the past month

She wanted to tell her about Casa and about Shantanu her brush with the "wealthy brats" but couldn't

She was home tonite but Khanak had to be gone. Ritu was shocked at first to hear her Aada was "setting her up" like this. Ritu had wanted her to find her own special someone. She had even offered to speak with Uncle. But Khanak had discouraged her. "there was no one else so what would Ritu tell Aada?"

"this was easier. She could meet refuse and go on with life or may be meet accept and move out of Mumbai"

Nirav: Hi!

Shaken out of her "water slide building" project looks up to see a man standing by the table

He is skinny and of medium height, wears glasses is dressed in formal clothes

Khanak: "Hi!" "Nirav?"

He smiles'''.. "there is no cleft on his cheek, not one not two on the same cheek" like someone she knows'............

Nirav: Haan. (switches to Hindi while checking her out covertly)

She tries not to squirm, he seats himself

Nirav: I am sorry I am late. Kitna traffic hai Mumbai mein!

Khanak: Yes, plus it rained'.. aaj subah

Nirav: Main yahan ek din aur nahi ruk sakta (shakes his head in frustration)

The conversation is labored'''' but slowly finds a groove

He owns a DHL franchise, was born and raised in Ahmedabad. Has no clue about architecture

Hates Mumbai. Would never want to live here he says. He talks a lot, waits and waits to hear her speak.

He has two sisters, one younger.

The waiter appears, he fusses over what he likes to eat, she orders a serving of snacks. He is concerned about what she will eat at dinner. She is not sure............about dinner..............😳😳

He is a vegetarian, but doesn't eat out much, loves "Mom's cooking" he admits. Asks her if likes to cook. She admits she loves to.

She excuses herself to go to the ladies room. Walks the gleaming granite hallway. Hears someone call out her name

Shaan: Khanak? (surprised)

To be continued......................

Edited by aditee - 14 years ago
vaish_123 thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
"there is no cleft on his cheek, not one not two in the same cheek" like someone she knows'''..

Beautiful!👏👏👏

Update soon!
adventure_gurl thumbnail
20th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 14 years ago
wow this is going to be awesome, keep up the great work Aditee!
saaaz thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
He didn't seem curious about her at all though. Maybe he is unconcerned? I am just a coworker?

could she be more wrong??

I know I was one of those who said draaaag it...but for god's sake...get on with it now...bahut ho gaya....get him to punch Nirav and her to heal his fist...and then slap him for it...and then he holds her close....and ...hello...yeh tera story hai na...??/ fast update plisss....

kya likhtee ho yaar...proud of you my friend...extremely proud...


aditee thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 14 years ago

PART 17 C

Hallway by Ziya-Oberoi Towers

Sat 8:08 PM

She knows that voice only too well, she has heard it many times in her mind…………. Turns around startled, he had almost caught up to her, he was wearing a tan six pocket casual trousers with a emerald green Lacoste tee, one collar was up……..for some reason.

He looked freshly showered and cheerful

She steps aside to let people pass, it's a huge corridor, gleaming, polished…… there are settees by the wall with oblong cushions on the sides. The men's and ladies room was at the ends of a double pillared section.

Khanak: Shantanu?(husky)

He tucks his hands in his pocket and just looks at her…… taking in the lovely emerald green chiffon saree, the emerald like pendant hanging from a flimsy chain…… the kohl lined eyes…………

Shaan:Hi! What are YOU doing here?

Khanak: Why?

Shaan: I mean sorry, I meant…….. tum is waqt? (checks his watch)

Khanak: (checks her phone, its shows 8:08)Early dinner at Ziya (smug)

Shaan: With who? (checks her out again)

Khanak leans on the wall suddenly drained, nervous, afraid of facing the truth. Her mouth feels dry

Shaan walks up to her, is a foot away, hands still in the pocket

Shaan: Khanak?

Khanak: I can ask you the same

Shaan: I am here with you (deeply)

Her eyes fly to his becoz something that tone hinted that he might have meant it

Khanak: I had a meeting (murmurs)

Shaan: With us? (Ajemra?)

Khanak: No!

Shaan: Phir?

Khanak: A friend…….. an acquaintance…….. I think

Shaan: What? (confused)

Khanak: That's not important, what did you want? I told you I didn't want to speak with you.

Shaan: We don't have to fight again Khanak…… kiske saath aayi tum?

Khanak: Nir…..Nirav (guilty)

Shaan: Who is HE?

Khanak: Someone………. Someone my Aada wanted me to meet

It takes him a minute to understand the Aada reference

Shaan: Is that your Dad?

They are speaking into each others eyes now

Khanak: Ya in Gujarati…….

Shaan: He brought you here?

Khanak: No I took a local and a cab…… hes waiting

Shaan: Nirav? Who is he?

Khanak: Aada ne kaha ki main unse miloon

Shaan: UNSE? What is that supposed to mean?

Khanak: He owns a franchise……. Some package delivery thing DHL…… I think

Shaan: Why? (still confused at her super cryptic answers)

Khanak: Aada visited a couple weeks ago (tries to recall the exact date, and gives up)

Shaan: The Tuesday you took time off?

Khanak: Yes, he said I shud meet a couple of……..

It all sinks in now for him, the high color on her cheeks, the fumbling, the gorgeous appearance, her nervous stuttering……

Shaan:Nirav is here to "see" you (derisive, incredulous that people would continue with that 20th century practice of arranged marriages)

Khanak: Why? What is wrong? Not everybody picks up people at bars and pubs.

Shaan: Did I say that (takes one step towards her, there is probably inches separating them, her almost bare back is freezing)

Khanak: You implied

Shaan: You wore a saree for HIM? (offended)

Khanak: That's what most middle class girls wear when a prospective groom visits (slam!)

He would have shook her or done something worse like pin her against the wall if they weren't in a 5 star hotel's hallway

Shaan (blistering) So I take it you don't love Sooraj anymore?

Khanak: I know that I don't love YOU!

Something about his eyes makes her weak, his scent doesn't help the cause either

He can see the color on her face darken, her eyes are stormy, agitated

Shaan: Get rid of him Khanak! I will be in the lobby. I am coming to get you if I don't see you by 8.30 (firm)😳

Related Topics

Top

Stay Connected with IndiaForums!

Be the first to know about the latest news, updates, and exclusive content.

Add to Home Screen!

Install this web app on your iPhone for the best experience. It's easy, just tap and then "Add to Home Screen".