FF It's complicated||DISCONTINUED|| IMP NOTE-pg86 - Page 23

looking forward to the next part 😊

Here is chap 15 for all of u.... I hope u guys like it...

Sorry I couldn't update sooner... I suffered a writers block😭... didnt hve any idea how to proceed... so if this is not dat good im really sorry....it is long though... really long...

Please please do comment😊

~CHAPTER 15~

Khanak stood at the window sill looking out towards the big city, but her mind was somewhere else, she couldn't stop thinking about what had happened, about what she had felt when Shantanu had come close to her. She felt confused and conflicted, she didn't know what was it that she had felt, and why had she felt it, all she knew was that something had changed in her life, something had changed between Shantanu and her, and she was afraid of it. Afraid that she might cause more pain than she had already had caused, afraid that what she had felt would cause the little friendship she and Shantanu had formed to break. She had been so happy the past few days; she had felt her old self, the confident, happy Khanak returning to her, little by little, slowly and surely. She didn't want to lose herself again, she had felt like herself with Shantanu, he knew her, more than anyone else in this house, he knew her from before her marriage. She remembered how she had thought him to be the mithaiwala, he knew her as the married woman and the scorned widow... he knew her, and she felt comfortable with him because of that.

Abhi looked at his new best friend; she was looking out the widow, smiling her hair swayed because of the wind which had accompanied the rain. He smiled looking at her, and slowly picked up his camera, he wanted to capture her like this, and he clicked the picture.

'Wow...' she looked as perfect as she did standing in front of him.

Khanak turned around and saw Abhi holding something in his hands. She smiled a little, 'kya?'

'tum.'

'main kya?'

'bahut khoobsoorat lag rahi ho.'

She made a confused face.

'yakeen nahi hai toh khud dekhlo.' He stretched his hands and showed her the camera.

Khanak walked towards him and saw what he was holding up to her, her smiled broadened as she saw herself, 'yeh main hoon?'

'nahi yeh Shantanu hai. Of course yeh tum ho silly!'

'hahaha, burdhal!'

'Achcha ab apne aap ko niharna band karo, aur mujhe ek baat batao.'

'kya?'

He stood up and brought the two big board kind of things that were lying at the entrance of Shantanu and her room. 'mujhe yeh batao ki in dono mein se main Tashu ko kaunsi painting gift karoo.'

'kya?'

Abhi sat on the sofa and looked at her as he opened on the paintings, 'sorry mujhe paintings ko hindi mein kehte hai nahi aata...'

She sat near him and saw him as he tore the newspaper that covered the paintings, 'chitr!' she squealed with delight when she realised what was he showing her.

::::

Shan was walking back to his room after meeting Natasha; the whole thing seemed like a blur in his memory. He going there, Tashu hugging him, they were talking about work, and some other things he didn't recall. His mind was not under his control, all the time he had kept thinking about Khanak, and what he had felt for her.

She kept flashing across his mind, the moment that they had shared- or rather the moment he had felt and she was probably oblivious to- kept replaying in his head. In his mind, her closed eyes and nervous lips kept coming out of nowhere. Her back, her neck, the little cluster of moles...

'Shan! Control yourself!' he said to himself, 'it was nothing, absolutely nothing! Right?'

'uss incident ke bare mein soochna band kar!' her image flashed through his mind, he shut his eyes, 'band kar!' he took a deep breath in. 'relax Shan, tu yeh kar sakta hai, bus uske bare mein soochna band karna hai.... no biggy. tu umm... Tashu ke bare mein sooch, the love of your life Natasha...' he closed his eyes, 'uske lambe baal yaad kar, uska chehra...' Khanak's face flashed across his mind, 'no! Shan focus dude, focus on Natasha, not Khanak, Natasha...'

Khanak kept crossing his mind, 'uff yaar, Shan apne mind ko control kar!'

He started walking towards his room again, ' her neck flashed in his mind, then her hair...'

He clicked his fingers near his head, 'band kar! Just stop it!'

He reached his room and heard Khanak shouting excitingly, 'Chitr!'

He stopped in his tracks, 'chitr? Yeh kya hota hai? Koi insect toh nahi?! Please god please yeh insect bhaag jaye, please...'

He heard Abhi's voice, 'tumhe paintings, mera matlaab hai chitr pasand hai?'

'oh paintings... thank god,' he bought his hands to his chest, and took a breath of relief.

'haan mujhe chitr bahut pasand hai, mein aise bahut chitr banati thi Dhulwadi mein, har roz ek.'

'toh ab kyun nahi banati?'

'Abhi...'

Shan smiled as he heard her say Abhi's name, he just knew that in that moment she was looking at Abhi like he was a fool, with her hands on her waist. And he was right.

'chitr banane ke liye saaman bhi chahiye hota hai!' her voice then turned a little serious, ' Aur waise bhi meine Suraj ke marne ke baad se ek bhi chitr nahi banaya.'

Abhi changed the topic, ' achcha batao yeh kaisi hai?'

Smart boy, thought Shan, he smiled, 'aakhir dost kiska hai? Mera influence toh aana hi tha na.' He whispered to the walls.

'bahut achcha! Par yeh kiske liye hai?'

'Tashu, woh upset thi toh isliye main uske liye liya tha...'

Aur teri wajah se mujhe Khanak ke liye kya special karna hai woh mujhe pata chal gaya... Shan smiled before walking away from the room.

'aur iss doosre wale ka aap kya karenge?' asked Khanak.

'woh mom ke liye.'

'mom? Apki bai aa rahi hai?'

'nahi, mein jaa raha hoon.'

Khanak face saddened, 'tum ja rahe ho? Par tumne toh kuch nahi bataya...'

'woh mom ka phone aaj hi aaya tha, woh bimaar hai, issliye jaana padega.'

'par, kab tak?'

'kyun miss karogi mujhe?'

'Abhi aapki yaad toh ayegi na! Hum itne achche dost ban gaye hai... aur jab Shantanu chale jaate hai tab aapke aur dadi ke alawa aur koi hota nahi hai mujhse baat karne ke liye...'

Abhi smiled, 'pata nahi, mom jab tak theek hogi tab tak wahi rehna padega. Par jab bhi tum ekeli ho, tab tab tum mujhe phone karlena, aur main tumhe entertain karta rahoonga.'

'toh aap kab jaa rahe hai?'

'parso (day after tomorrow) .'

'itni jaldi! Aapne Shantanu aur Natashji ko bataya?'

'nahi, meine sab se pehle tumhe bataya hai, akhir tum meri sab se achchi dost ho.'

Khanak smiled, 'apko nahi pata na ki aap Shantanu ko yeh baat kaise batayenge?'

Abhi smiled, 'nahi.. aisa...'

He looked at Khanak who was smiling knowingly, he knew there was no use pretending. He sighed, 'mujhe bilkul nahi pata mein Shan ko kaise bataonga...'

'meri madat chahiye?'

Abhi smiled, 'thodi si.'

They both smiled and hugged one another, Abhi knew he would miss Khanak a lot, and he knew she would miss him to. And he wasn't wrong.

::::

Khanak woke up, with a headache, she had not been able to sleep well, through most of the night she had been tossing and turning, thinking about Shantanu, or about Abhi leaving, sometimes her mind just drifted to her old days where the most difficult thing was to decide what to cook for lunch. She had pretended to sleep when she had heard Shantanu coming in, he had crept in the room, and as silently as he could manage he had lain on the bed next to the wall of pillows and sheets between them. Khanak commended him, usually if she fell asleep before, he would come in and switch on the lights and start doing something or the other, which generally woke her up. But today, if she would have been asleep she would not have even turned in her sleep at his arrival. She kept her eyes shut and somewhere between thinking about Shantanu and Abhi she had fallen asleep.

Her eyes finally adjusted to the light and she saw the bedside clock, it was eight in the morning, she flew out the bed, 'itna kaam hai! Aur main sooti rahi... she looked around the room, she didn't see Shantanu anywhere, he wasn't in the bathroom, the shower wasn't turned on, 'yeh Shantanu kaha gaye? Aur yeh mujhe utha nahi sakte the? Burthal.'

She hurriedly got dressed and went outside the room.

'yeh jab dekho mujhe burthal kyun kehti hai?' Shantanu came out of the adjacent room, he had been there waiting for her to leave their room so he could put his plan in action. He still felt weird about what he had felt the previous night, but he chose to ignore it, he chose to not let it bother him, and he chose being Khanak's friend over pondering over what had happened (which was probably nothing , right?) And let his and Khanak's friendship get weird.

'pata nahi sir, yeh toh aapko hi pata hoga.'

Shan looked behind him and saw Hari holding the stuff he had gone and bought for Khanak from an artist friend of his. 'meine tumse nahi poocha.'

'par aapne poocha tha, aur yahan par mere alawa aur koi nahi hai.'

'iss ghar ke servants bhi mere peeche pade rehte hai...'

'kya sir?'

'umm... kuch nahi, ab chalo mere kaamre yeh saara saman rakhna hai...'

'jee sir.'

Shantanu for the next hour, with Hari's help re-arranged his room, to make a little painting space for Khanak, so that she could re-start doing what she loved. He smiled looking at his and Hari's handiwork. 'perfect, absolutely perfect.'

'sir mein Khanak ma'am ko bulane jao?'

'hmm... actually nahi, tum jao, Khanak ko main khud laaonga...'

::::

Khanak stirred the dish on the stove, her mind wasn't into the chore she was doing , 'yeh gaaye kahan? Aaj to chuti hai, yeh to purra din soote, phir itni jaldi uthkar gaye kaha?'

Khanak wondered where Shantanu was, she had met Abhi who was on his way to give Natasha her gift, and even he had not seen Shantanu since morning. She couldn't help but wonder about his ware bouts, he wasn't the kind to go somewhere early in the morning! No correction he wasn't the kind to wake up before noon.

A hand shut her eyes, 'mere bare mein sooch rahi ho?' whispered someone in her ear.

'Shantanu! yeh kya bachpana hai?'

'bachpana toh aise keh rahi ho jaise tum khud asi(eighty) saal ki ho!'

'haath hatayiye!'

'Khanak yaar shh... mujhe tumhe kuch dikhana hai.'

'Shantanu aapko kaise pata chala?'

'kya?'

'yahi ki mujh mein bandh aankho se dekhne ki shakti hai!'

'hahaha ver funny Khanak, ab mere saath chalo.'

'ab aap aankho se haath hatayenge toh hi to chaloongi.'

'Khanak tumhe mujhpar bharosa nahi hai?'

Khanak smiled, 'theek hai, par agar main ek baar bhi giri na toh... toh main aapko chodungi nahi!'

'sach? Tum mujhe nahi chodogi?'

'haan.'

' Aisi baat hai toh main tumhe khud push kar deta hoon.' Shan smiled and whispered, ' Aur mujhe pata hai tum bhi yahi chahati ho.'

'uh... aisa kuch nahi hai, apne... mazaak band kijiye, aur... aur jo dikhana hai woh jaldi dikhaiye.'

Shantanu led Khanak to their room.

'tum tayaar ho?'

'Shantanu! haan ab apna haath hataiye.'

Shantanu moved his hand from her eyes, and stood on the side, he wanted to see her when she would finally see what he had done.

Khanak slowly opened her eyes, but even after opening them she felt like she was in a dream, she was standing in their room, but it was different. The place where the sofa used to be; now there stood a canvas stand, on it there was a canvas, and paints! She saw paints... colours and brushes, everything she needed for painting and more. She was overcome with happiness, and shock, but the good kind of shock, she stood there utterly speechless and overwhelmed, her mouth was opened and she was sure she hadn't taken in air in her lungs since the time she had opened her eyes.

'toh?'

She heard Shantanu's nervous voice, she knew he wanted an answer, a reaction to the thing he had done, but she was too overcome by emotions to decide which one to portray.

'uh... kaisa laga? Umm... meine tumhe aur ... uhh... Abhi ko baat karte hue sunna tha... isliye...'

She didn't say anything.

' woh... tumne meri madaat ki thi na ... presentation mein... isliye... mein tumhare liyed kuch special karna chahata tha...'

Nothing.

'Khanak? A...agar tumhe pasand nahi hai toh main yeh sab wapas kar...'

She finally looked at him.... and... Smiled and started laughing... her eyes twinkled with happiness like a thousand stars had bought real estate in her eyes...

And then she did the one thing she never thought she would do, but that was the only thing she could have done... she hugged him.

Shan smiled, he knew instantly he had given her the best present.

'thunku... aap mere liye yeh saab laye... ma...main .... mujhe...' she started to cry. Her eyes watered and in a minute she could feel herself shaking, not uncontrollably, but enough to tense Shantanu, he pulled her away from him and looked into her eyes, concern in his eyes.
'Khanak?'

She looked into his eyes with her teary ones.

He took her to the bed and sat her, then went and got her water from the bedside table. 'lo pani pee lo.'

Khanak took the water and took a sip, she didn't want water but drinking it gave her time to think.

'kya hua? Tumhe pasand...'

'nahi... aisa kuch nahi hai... '

'toh phir?'

'mujhe chitr banana ke liye hamesh Suraj badava deta tha. Agar woh nahi hota, agar woh mujhe ...' she felt her throat tighten, and another tear travelling down her cheek, '...agar Suraj nahi hota toh main chitrkari (painting) kabhi nahi karti.'

Shan smiled reassuringly and slightly squeezed her hand.

'maine wada (promise) kiya tha main... kabhi... chirtkari nahi karoongi...'

Shan smiled, ' Khanak... main Suraj ko nahi jaanta tha, par main itna toh keh sakta hoon, keh woh kabhi nahi chahata ki tum woh cheez chod do jo tumhe pasand hai.'

'par Suraj ke bina... mujhe nahi pata ki main kya banao.'

' kyun? Tum kuch bhi bana sakti ho... umm...' he looked around the room, ' umm, jaise...jaise haan! Mujhe. Tum meri painting banao.'

Khanak smiled, 'Shantanu....'

'shh... tum kehna chahati ho ki Suraj chahata ki tum chitrkari chod do, uss ek cheez ko jo tumhe pasand hai, jo tumhe khushi deti hai? Aur kis liye? Tum hi soocho, ek taraf hain woh cheez jo tumhe pasand hai, jisse tumhe khushi milti hai, aur doosri taraf sirf kuch ... ek choti si wajah jo tumhe uss cheez se door rehne ko keh rahi hai, ab tum tum decide karo, tum kya choose karogi.'

Khanak looked at him, what he had said was true for her leaving painting, Suraj would never want her to leave art after he died, just because he died, woh hamesha kehta tha ki hamesha woh karna chahiye jo tumhe khushi deta hai, she thought. And she couldn't help but think that what Shantanu had said was true for their friendship to. Being friends with Shantanu had bought her back to life, he had made her laugh again, and it was because of him that she could feel her old self coming back to her. Was she ready to throw away their friendship for something she had felt?

She smiled and stood up, and went to the canvas and changed its position, and started sharpeneing the charcoal.

'Khanak?'

'Shantanu sawal poochna band karo, aur chup chap betho,' she smiled, ' mujhe waqt lagega tumhe banane mein.'

Shan smiled, ' jaise aap kahe...' he sat on the place she had vacated.

Khanak picked up charcoal after a long time, and she drew after a long time, and the first thing she drew was Shantanu, her friend...

I wanted to give Khanak something she loved, and since I am a painter I made her one too. i hope you guys liked it. please do comment.😊