Chapter 8
Asad stood by the window of his high rise apartment that looked out to the city, as the sky darkened he saw his reflection. A man he barely recognised stood there looking back at him, the more he looked the more angry he became so much so that he began to loath the mere sight of himself. As images of his own brutality towards Zoya played back in his head, he felt physically sick, her pleas that he ignored, her attempts to make peace with him that he shunned and then Humera's words that continued to pierce through him.
His mind went back to when he was 12, a conversation he had with his Daddi 'Asad sometimes we become the people that we hate the most...and you my child are not capable of hating...so why do you show so much hatred towards a girl who has lost so much...don't push her away, befriend her and I promise you she will be the best friend you will ever of had' Asad closed his eyes and fisted his hands as he tried to rid of the pain that had started to cripple him.
As he tried to regulate his breathing he looked back up at his reflection that stood there almost mocking him 'there is no greater fool than you Asad Ahmed Khan, just look at you...what are you...you are nothing, without your family, without your loved ones you are no one...what goes round comes round, you hurt the people closest to you and now you stand on your own in your own sorrow and self-pity...you let an emotion you felt at the age of 10 lead you down a path of destruction just because you couldn't let go, you are as mature as a 3 year old who throws never ending tantrum...it is not too late Asad go home...go back to your loved ones...go back to Zoya'
Asad closed his eyes and felt tears burn his skin as they rolled down, the pain he felt was excruciating, he had never felt so defeated before, and the worst thing was that he himself was responsible for his own defeat, after 12 years Asad Ahmed Khan finally started to wake up and see, started to do what he had never done before and that was to admit his fault and say that he was wrong.
Najma and Zoya came outside as the car pulled up, the minute she saw Haider step out she went running up to him. Haider hugged her 'good to have you back' 'good to be back Princess' Humera met Najma and then looked at the two of them 'how comes we never get a hug and welcome like that...favouritism that is' Zoya started to laugh 'of course it is'. Humera and Haider walked inside to meet Rashid and Dilshad, they all sat around the dinner table bombarding them with questions about their honeymoon. Humera looked at Haider, who understood what she as asking 'Uncle...there is something we need to tell you...' Rashid looked at Haider with concern seeing his facial expression change 'Beta is everything ok?' 'Yes...it's just that...yesterday whilst me and Humera were out we bumped in to...Asad' Haider and Humera looked at the four pairs of wide eyes that looked back at them, where three sets started to become emotional one hardened. 'Is...is he ok?' Dilshad asked in a choked voice Yes Aunty, he is...well am not sure how well after Humera finished with him' Zoya looked towards Humera 'What...I couldn't help it...and I am not sorry he needed a good bashing' 'it's ok Humera...you don't have to be sorry ever...' Rashid said.
Haider took Zoya to the side just before they left to go back to their apartment 'tell me you are ok?' Zoya rolled her eyes 'I am more than ok, and you should know that...go home and chill...and don't you dare come back to work tomorrow...I want you to help Humera set the apartment up, I have arranged for a maid to come every day so make use of her...I will see you in a few days' time'.
Zoya saw how Dilshad had started to look upset, she walked up to her and put her arm around her 'Ammi...I am sorry' Dilshad turned to face her 'for what beta...you have nothing to be sorry for...you have not done anything wrong...if anyone was wrong and is wrong its him...and if you are worried because I look upset then there is no need to...despite everything a mothers heart still yearns for her son as stupid as he may be' Zoya smiled and embraced Dilshad in a warm hug before she left.
'Zoya, can you please come into my cabin' 'Yes Abu, two minutes'. Zoya went to see Rashid 'Zoya beta, there is a conference in Banglore, it's a two day event could you attend on behalf of me, I would have gone but I have the Australian delegation coming on Thursday' 'sure, no problem, I will get my ticket booked and leave tonight' 'thank you so much, I will email you the details, you may be asked to do a small presentation...' 'don't worry Abu, I will put something together this afternoon...let me call Ammi and ask her to pack a bag for me'.
Zoya finished her work and rushed home 'Ammi, I am off, I will see you on Friday In Sha Allah...is there anything you need?' 'No beta, you just look after yourself' Zoya was about to walk out when Najma called out after her 'Api...I want a present back' Zoya started laughing 'ok...you make sure you look after Ammi and Abu'.
The conference went really well, due to her proficiency and extra ordinary talent as a young business woman Zoya managed to create quite a stir, a number of companies showed great interest in dealing with Khan Group of Industries. 'Abu, I am just about to board the plane, I have emailed you the report and sent you a list of new possible clients' 'Zoya, I am so proud of you, thank you so much beta...Zoya I need to talk to you about something...hello...Zoya can you hear me' 'Abu...yes kind of you are cutting out...Abu...damn' Zoya said as her phone died 'perfect timing'.
Zoya landed a little later than expected, she was hoping the driver would still be there and luckily he was 'Dev, is Abu still at the office?' 'No Ma'am he is at home, would you like to take me you to the office?' 'No, take me straight home, thank you'.
Zoya stepped foot in the front door and stopped as she felt a cold wash over her, she held on to her hand bag tighter as her heart picked up a few extra beats. As she came in to the living room she saw Rashid and Dilshad sitting there and from the corner of her eye she saw him. Zoya took in a deep breath, refusing to look at him properly or even acknowledge his presence Zoya put on a smile and walked up to her parents. 'Asalaam O Alaikum Ammi, Abu' she said as she went to hug them. Dilshad and Rashid looked at her and then at him as he stood up 'Abu, sorry I couldn't finish my sentence my battery died, did you get my emails?' 'Y...yes, I did...thank you' 'Ammi, I am just going to get changed, and then I have a dinner date with Humera and Prince, I will be back a little late' she said as she picked up her back and walked off.
Asad looked at her retreating back, he was finding it hard to collect his thoughts, he couldn't believe that she didn't even acknowledge him. Dilshad looked at him with moist eyes 'don't expect her to forgive you Asad, after what you did to her...you don't exist for her anymore'. Dilshad's words hit him hard, it was the truth, one that he was going to have to accept.
Dilshad walked off in the same direction, she needed to see if she was ok. Dilshad found Zoya sitting on the edge of her bed holding her stomach 'Zoya' she whispered, Zoya looked up at her and then ran into her arms 'Ammi...what is he doing here...why is he back' Dilshad stroked her hair 'he came back this morning Zoya...he came to apologise' Zoya pulled back and narrowed her eyes 'apologise...he thinks he will apologise and everything will be ok...No' she said in a raised voice 'I know Zoya...please calm down, I have already told him...but he is back as of now...I know this is going to be hard for you as well as it will be for all of us...' 'Ammi...if he is back then I can't stay here, I refuse to live with him under the same roof' 'Zoya' Dilshad called out in a shocked tone of voice 'Zoya you listen to me, you are not going anywhere, this is your home and always will be...I will never ask you to forgive him beta, and me and your Abu...we are with you...we know what he did was wrong and like you said apologising won't make up for it' 'Ammi, it has taken me a long time to get over him, get to a point where I have come to believe that he means nothing to me, I want nothing to do with him, he is your son so you can forgive him, embrace him or whatever you like but for me...never, I hate him Ammi...I hate him for hating me, for making me feel the way I have since I first stepped into this house, the pain, the abuse the...No, I will never forgive him, I can't and I won't' Zoya walked past Dilshad and straight into the bathroom.
Dilshad let out a pain filled sigh as she turned around she saw Asad standing in the door way looking at her with moist eyes 'she really...she hates me?' 'Dilshad fisted her hand in an attempt to keep herself calm, as much as she loved Asad and wanted things differently he had to know that the damage he caused over so many years couldn't be rectified overnight 'yes Asad, she hates you and she has every reason and every right to, she has built on what you left her with for five years and now, the Zoya you left no longer lives...and this Zoya...if I were you I would stay away from her, the last thing I want is for you upsetting her unnecessarily' Asad looked at his Ammi in disbelief 'Ammi, how can you say that, I have come back to sort things out, I have realised that I was wrong, I am sorry Ammi' 'sorry just isn't good enough beta, and you are apologising to the wrong person...Asad, please go to your room, she will be out in a minute and I don't want her to see you standing here'.
Dilshad walked out of the room and closed the door behind her, what they didn't know was that Zoya stood by the bathroom door listening to them, although her heart pained her she refused to let her eyes shed the tears that stung so badly. Getting ready Zoya picked up her phone and bacg and walked out 'Abu, I am going, I think I will stay with Humera tonight, I'll see you tomorrow' Rashid placed his hand over her head 'I understand beta, I will see you tomorrow'
Asad walked into their room, the last memory he had of it was how badly he had treated her, how he had shunned her accusing her of such treachery. Asad closed his eyes as the images in his head started to create a storm within him. That evening Asad walked around the house aimlessly, he walked into Daddi's old room and completely broke down, as much as Dilshad wanted to comfort her son, she knew that he needed to let this out of his system, he needed to do this by himself.
A few miles away Humera and Haider sat down with Zoya trying to support her the best they could. Haider who was as unforgiving as Zoya encouraged her to make his life a misery much to Humera's disapproval, even though she hated him for what he had done to her best friend she still asked Zoya to think about it and to view things with an open mind.
Zoya was far from hearing anything logical, she stood up and looked at her two best friends with a hardened expression 'he can try all he wants, he can be as nice as he wants I will never forgive him, it's about time Asad Ahmed Khan got a taste of his own bitter medicine'.
'Ammi I was 18 and she 16, we were just about legally allowed to be married...after all that happened...look I know I reacted badly and was totally unreasonable..' 'unreasonable, Asad you were damn out of order, the torture and hurt you inflicted on her was not only deliberate but is inexcusable' 'I know...please Ammi, I have realised what I done was wrong...I want to make it right and I can only do that with your support' Dilshad took in a deep sigh 'I can't promise you anything Asad, but I want this to work as much as you do so I will see what I can do'.
Zoya walked into her office and stopped as she saw him standing leaning against her window. As soon as he heard her come in he turned around to face her giving her a very nervous faint smile, Zoya turned around to walk straight back out again when she heard him call out to her 'Zoya, please wait...just one moment of your time' Zoya held on to the air that she had just inhaled and closed her eyes, she slowly turned around and looked at him straight in the eyes 'what?' she said in a stern voice. Swallowing hard Asad stepped forwards 'can we at least sit down?' Zoya walked towards her desk and put her bag down 'sit' she said pointing to the chair opposite hers.
Asad sat opposite her and waited for her to do the same, once seated they both looked at each other in silence. His eyes reflected remorse and hers anger 'I have a lot to do...so say whatever it is you need to and then please leave' Asad was taken aback by her tone of voice and directiveness 'Zoya...please I just wanted to say that...' 'that you are sorry...right?' Asad nodded 'ok...so you are...now that you have said what you needed to you can leave'
Asad felt his insides slice painfully as she carried on looking at him with pure hate, not being able to say anything more he stood up and walked towards the door just before he walked out he turned around and looked at her 'I know you hate me and I know I deserve it...I am ready to admit that I was wrong Zoya...I came back for one reason and one reason only and that is you...throw all you want at me but I won't leave without you'.
As she saw the door close behind him she let out the tears that painfully burnt her eyes, her nails had dug so deep into her palms that she left red scars in her skin. Zoya felt her whole body tremble she couldn't work out what it was that she felt, all she wanted to do was scream at the top of her voice, all she wanted was her life back to what it was a few days ago, as hard as it was it was once she had become accustomed to, one she was happy with.
Having seen Asad walk out of her room Haider went running in to find Zoya in a state 'Princess...what happened...what did he say...did he hurt you?' he asked with anger slowly building up. Zoya put her arms around Haider and poured her heart out through her beautiful eyes, Haider hadn't seen her break down like this since the day he last left her and that was 5 years ago. In his on-going failed attempts to calm her down Haider quickly called for Rashid who came running to her room. Taking Zoya into his arms he asked Haider to give them a moment together 'Zoya, beta come here...sit' with her still in his hold Rashid sat down with Zoya on the sofa 'Shhh...please beta...you have always been so strong don't let go of that strength...not now' Zoya looked up at him 'I don't know if I can do this Abu...why do I have to be the one who always suffers...have I not been punished enough...what did I do to deserve this...Abu if this is the reward I get for loving, caring and being honest in everything I do then can you imagine what I would be going through if I was like him...'
Rashid closed his eyes as he felt a pain hit hard against his chest, he felt guilty as he had failed in his promise to his dying friend 'I am so sorry Zoya, this is all my fault...when I took you home I thought I would be giving you a new life and just look at you...because of my own son you are living through hell' Zoya shook her head 'Abu, please don't say that, you and Ammi are the best thing that happened to me, you gave me a home a little sister...all the love that anyone could ask for...I am here today because of you...I grew up knowing exactly what Asad felt towards me but that never stopped me from loving him. We got married very young at an age when we still very much children but I was ready to accept and wait until we had grown up...matured...I would have waited until the very end Abu...if only he hadn't shunned me and left me the way he did...he broke me, he took away my reason to live...he took himself away from me and I will never forgive him for that'.
Edited by Saima-Syed - 10 years ago
Ganesh Kartikeya
Shiv Shakti
Mannat Har Khushi Paane Ki
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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