Do love stories like Zoya-Asad ever work? - Page 3

even if that kind of relationship work out there has to be lot of adjustments , compromise shlould be done to make it work out . but if adjustment has been done from one side then it doesnt work out :)

Originally posted by: mohabbatgirl

<font color="#000066" face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" size="2">Good one.. here's my reasoning..

Yes, the concept of 'opposites attract' does sound and appear very dreamy and romantic, thanks to our TV shows and movies..

But of course, it does happen in real life.. Can u imagine, how boring it would get if you and your partner happened to have the same set of principles, same thinking, same preferences? Your relationship will definitely be smooth sailing, but it'll be monotonous at the same time.. The passion and attraction might fizzle out after a while, coz you'll both have figured out and completely accepted each other in a matter of few years.. What next?!

This is where 'contrasting natures' come into play..
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It's good to have someone whose opinions differ from you, someone who tries to challenge you at each step.. That sort of keeps you thinking, makes you grow up on somethings as well.. Of course, it's a bit too glorified on TV and is not soo extreme in real life..

My fiance and myself are entirely 2 different people, i'm quite talkative and outgoing, while he's a bit reserved and more of an introvert.. i take each day as it comes while all he cares about is the future.. im religious, he's an atheist.. i believe in families; he doesn't.. That makes us quite different. and we do fight a lot over these issues.. but what matters in the end, is the fact that you're relationship is above all of this.. and the urge to make it work is what keeps you going.. 😊 of course that is if, you're 100% ready and committed!

Issues and fights are a part and parcel of every relationship in the world; be it with parents, siblings, best friends and couples too.. And there's this misconception, that marriages are a compromise.. I don't think so; it's not a compromise.. It's only a matter of acceptance of the other person's opinions and dreams.. You don't really have to sacrifice yours for the sake of it.. Both can co-exist together.. 😊

Well, i hope i haven't ranted and bored you.. 😉😛

As for Asya, looking forward to seeing if they can make it work despite all odds... their contrasting natures are going to be the defining point in their relationship in the future.. 😊 Let's see if the shooting star grants them their wishes.. 😉😃
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First of all, congrats on your engagement! 😊
And when I meant opposites, I meant it specifically from a beliefs, customs and principles point of view. Not from the kind of nature you have point of view.
It's obviously good to have different nature and that's what always happens but adjustment becomes difficult when you have a different set of rules you abide by. How to raise your kids and run the house were examples that I gave from this specific point of view.
And the fact that Zoya and Asad are both headstrong might make it difficult for them to adjust.

Nice and sensible question! the same was asked to me when i said my parents I want to marry the guy whom I loved 😊 then I had told them we will try our level best to give a positive answer to ur question and today after 3 yrs(i knw its a short time) of marriage I can say we r still proving it 😛 therz no relationship that doesn't have difference of opinions regardless of arranged or love or same religion or different religion, but love and attachment never lets those differences win over a relationship which is true. and believe me without fights n differences of opinion relationship is spiceless. I have been married to a guy who is 80% opposite to me in ideas, beliefs and we both belong to different religion, different culture. We were in a relation for 6 years n then married after so much convincing of parents. Ours was more or less similar to Asad-Zoya story, he hated me from our school days for my free spirited, extra talkative nature, and I happen to come across him during a village stay camp where we had to stay in the same house for 5 days along with 2 other ppl, we had a lot of fights and slowly he got to know what exactly I am n even i hated his type of guys who like to see girls as typical barathiya naari but dont know how cupid struck us n here we r still together after 9yrs with fights and lots of love n masti by God's grace :) If love is of just attraction then it will always have problems but if love is from soul then it will win over all the obstacles, it makes u adjust, sacrifice with a happy heart, and we never come to know that how we just agreed with his/her idea so easily though it was different from mine :)

they do my cuzin is the living example of it she and her husband are totally opposite and both are head strong they fight too but love each other tooo much love them may God bless them

Originally posted by: booksfreak07

First of all, congrats on your engagement! 😊
And when I meant opposites, I meant it specifically from a beliefs, customs and principles point of view. Not from the kind of nature you have point of view.
It's obviously good to have different nature and that's what always happens but adjustment becomes difficult when you have a different set of rules you abide by. How to raise your kids and run the house were examples that I gave from this specific point of view.
And the fact that Zoya and Asad are both headstrong might make it difficult for them to adjust.

Hey..

I guess, you mean the adjusting into a marriage bit, don't you?

Well, I have another example to share with u..
My first cousin got married about 5 yrs back; she was a typical Mumbai girl, born and brought up in a traditional family yet given sufficient freedom of expression.. She tied the knot in an arranged marriage with an NRI guy from the States.. Obviously, she moved there a few weeks later.. Initially, the picture was all rosy with both of them getting to knw each other and settling into their new lives..
However, with time, things started to get a bit difficult.. She was homesick; there were way too many cultural differences between the two of them.. He'd lived in Boston all his live; his approach towards things was very different from hers.. Having met him a few times, myself, I wouldn't say he was bad or wrong; but he just had his own thinking..

She got fed up after a while and was adamant on returning back to India.. Things had gotten really nasty.. They were almost on the verge of splitting up..That's when elders stepped in, thankfully.. Made them realise both sides of the coin..

And eventually both came around.. When her daughter was born, my Jiju had suggested to move back to India; however she refused since she'd lived with him for 4 years and she knew it would be very difficult for him to adjust here.. And now, they're a happy family.. No outsider can guess that they've struggled with their relationship in the past..

So, I guess it's just a matter of time and your approach.. I'm sure we've seen that with our parents as well.. Both parents might not have the same ideologies.. One maybe laid back, the other would be forever fretting over things.. They might disagree on the slightest domestic issues, like having a pet, children's schooling, relationships with in-laws, etc.. However, at the end of the day, we will end up becoming mature.. Our parents know what's best for the house and their children and that's when adjustment needs to be done; not for the sake of a relationship, but because, they look at a greater good.. They want to raise a family; keep them knitted together.. So, it's not always difficult to adjust and settle in; it's just a matter of time and approach coz if you truly love the other person, u would go to any extent to be together..

Like they say in Hindi, baat sirf nazariye ki hoti hai..

And well, applying the same to Asad-Zoya, yes they are two very different individuals and they might have troubles later on.. However, we, people in the subcontinent are truly blessed to have a family, esp. elders we can look up to, in times of need.. In Asya's case, like we've seen until now, I guess Dilshad and Zeenat will be the catalysts in the future..

They're different coz of their upbringing and their troubled pasts.. However, I feel with time, they will come around.. Besides, we never know, their pain, the very root cause of their contrasting principles and ideologies, may end up uniting the two..

Anyway, hope that helps.. 😊

@mohabbatgirl have you written anything? Cause if you have I can't read any text?? 😲

I strongly believe in the notion, 'opposites attract'. I mean, when two individuals who are poles apart can actually learn to live with the other's habits. it may even be one of the reasons why they fall in love. You would not want a replica of yourself in your partner. You would want someone who would make you a better person even though you don't want such a change. It's kind of a personal opinion.

Originally posted by: booksfreak07

@mohabbatgirl have you written anything? Cause if you have I can't read any text?? 😲

I just edited.. Do read it now..

Originally posted by: mohabbatgirl

I just edited.. Do read it now..

Wow!! I don't think I've ever read something so mature. Thanks for the awesome example. 😊

Sab kismat ki lukh hai ...is main kya shaq hai !