Part 1
She really did not want to see him again. She had made the promise to herself that she would never look for him and yet here she was standing in front of his door. She closed her eyes as every fibre of her being revolted when she pressed the doorbell hesitantly.
He opened his eyes as the noise disturbed his slumber. Someone was obviously pressing his doorbell relentlessly! His table clock showed that it was only ten in the morning and he wondered which bas***d was looking for him at such an early hour. He had barely stepped back home at six in the morning. It better not be a salesperson! Who the f**k not understands that if no one bloody answered the door it means no one is home except these sickening salespeople? He was determined to give this jerk a piece of his mind!
"What the hell is your problem? Can you not..." He bellowed the moment he swung the door open, venting his frustration for this rude interruption.
He came face to face with a stranger he knew so well and his heart stopped beating. He blinked. Was she a figment of his imagination? Was it the effect of a hangover? It just did not seem possible that she was standing in front of his door step after all these years. He rubbed his eyes and almost expected her to vanish when he was done.
She looked intently at the man before her. It clearly showed he had just stepped out from bed. His hair was in disarray, his eyes puffy, his shirt and trousers crumpled and she was sure he had stumbled into bed without changing his clothes from partying last night. He reeked of alcohol and cigarette smoke.
Even though it has been a while, she still felt the same. The memories evoked a wave of emotions which gushed through her and she clenched her fists to keep herself from doing something she would regret. The words she had rehearsed were jumbled in her mind and she prayed for composure.
"You...here?" He asked in disbelief when he finally accepted that she was real. He wished he looked more presentable but what difference would it make anyway? He took in everything about her. How was it possible that she was even more beautiful than his vivid memories of her?
"Take a blood test," she ordered coldly.
He continued staring at her.
"I...I...I do not...I mean..." he stammered. What was she talking about? Those were not the words he expected her to utter. Not that he was expecting anything in particular.
"I know of someone who needs a bone marrow transplant and you need to do a blood test to check your compatibility. Are you willing to do that?" she asked, detached as she tried to control her cracking voice.
Her words were gibberish to him. Who was the person that needed some transplant that she was willing to even come to him? It did not seem like a husband since she was not wearing any magalsutra. Could it be a boyfriend? A relative? What made her think he was willing to do whatever she asked? What was happening in her life?
"What is going on? You meet me five years later asking me to take a blood test? Who needs a bone marrow? I..." Yash asked, perplexed. The hangover and trying to digest her words made his head spin.
She ignored his questions and stated in a matter of fact way the timing, the department he should head to at the hospital to do the blood test and the person he should looked for. And then she simply walked away.
"What? Do you contact everyone you know and ask them to take a blood test or..."he shouted but she continued moving away. He wanted to run after her but his legs could not move. He leaned against the door, mystified. After what felt like forever, he finally slammed the door shut and plopped himself onto the bed again. He was incapable of figuring out what just transpired. She appeared before him five years later and asked for a blood test? What was seriously happening? He closed his eyes and hoped to sleep away this confusion but thoughts of her occupied his mind.
Flashback
He was riding on his motorcycle along the street in town when someone suddenly dashed across the small road. He was shocked by the person's sudden presence and tried to avoid her. Unfortunately, he skidded and fell off his bike.
"Oh my god! I am so sorry! I am so sorry! I should not have run across. Are you alright?"
He wanted to scream at this idiotic person who caused this accident but as he lifted his head and looked into the most beautiful pair of eyes, he decided against it. She crouched beside him, appearing worried and shaken by what she had just encountered.
"Are you alright? I am really sorry. Should I call an ambulance?"
He shook his head and tried to get up but his legs could barely move. He was speeding and the impact of the fall must have been severe to his joints.
"Oh my god! Your head is bleeding! Oh my god! Tissue! I have tissue..." the beautiful stranger blabbered as she poured the contents of her bag and frantically searched for something. She took the tissue and dapped his head. He pushed her hand away and got up with much difficulty. He grimaced in pain as he limped towards his motorcycle lying at the side of the road.
"You need to go to the hospital. I am so sorry that I caused this," she continued as she trailed beside him. "I am sorry..."
Thankfully his motorcycle still worked fine but he needed to send it to the workshop for the scratches and dents.
"Shouldn't we go to the hospital first? You can check your motorcycle later? Your head is still bleeding and your leg seems pretty bad."
He turned to her and told her that she could leave and was shocked when she cried all of a sudden.
"I am so sorry. I am always so careless and now you are hurt! Shall we go to the hospital?"she sobbed.
He was not even in severe pain. His right leg hurt when he limped and there was a cut on his forehead but the way she was wailing, one would have thought he had died. This beautiful girl was so strange! He tried to reassure her that he was fine but she insisted he went to the hospital. As he anticipated, he was allowed to go home with just a plaster on his forehead and his right leg in a cast. She had reacted like he was paralysed for life and was adamant to see him home.
"You can leave now. Don't your parents teach you it is dangerous to follow a stranger home?"
His words must have jolted her to the reality that she was in the apartment alone with him. She looked a little flustered and uneasy.
"Oh. You are technically not a stranger but the person I injured. Anyway, I know black belt, taekwondo and all sorts of stuffs so I am not scared," she boasted sounding totally the opposite of confident to him. "Anyway, I am leaving now. Do you stay alone? There is no one at home now it seemed. How about your food? You cannot cook or go out with your leg like that."
He just stared at her. He had come to the conclusion that she loved hearing her own voice. She had gone on about how she was running after a bus not to miss her lecture in college which was why she did not look when crossing and apologised about a million times for this accident and then related incidents where she was reckless during their trip to the hospital and back to his home.
" I am asking you, how will you settle lunch? Do you need me to get for you any food first?"
"My friend," he answered her curtly hoping she would disappear. He was capable of going to the shop to buy lunch.
"Ok, I will leave then. I will save my number in your hand phone ok? If you need help, just call me ok."
"Bye, I am leaving and you know I am really sorry," she said as she walked out of the door.
He sighed as he took his hand phone lying on the table. She had saved her number when she had not even told him her name? She had gone on about everything except introducing herself. What a weird girl! He checked his contact list wondering how he could identify her when the first name was already unfamiliar to him. Aarti? That's her name? He smiled to himself thinking of her antics and felt ridiculous.
He was caught by surprise when she came to his house again the next afternoon. She brought him food and asked him if he was better and went on repeating how she was responsible for his inconvenience. And it became a routine for her to come to his house after her college with food for them to eat. She would do her homework there sometimes and go back to her hostel before it became dark. Although he tried to conceal it and always chased her away, he loved her company. She was entertaining with her chatter and anecdotes and was a little crazy.
Once when she did not turn up, he was restless and was tempted to check on her but stopped himself. The faint attraction he felt towards her was not appropriate. She was a college going girl from a good family and he was just a thrash in society. He never knew who his father was and his mother had died when he was ten. No relatives ever claimed him. His mother never spoke of them anyway and he believed they did not even know he existed. He had wandered aimlessly on the street and lived like that for a year until he met Ram Bhai. Ram Bhai took him in and introduced him the basic need for people like them to survive in this society - stealing. Having gone through endless days of acute hunger pangs and freezing in the cold when there was no shelter or proper clothes to protect him from the rain, he no longer felt any remorse. The need to be alive overcame any subconscious culpability that bubbled within whenever he committed a crime.
As the years passed, the deeds got bolder and he was rewarded with this one bedroom apartment two years ago when he torched a certain warehouse as instructed. And now, ten years after meeting Ram Bahi, all he did was terrorised those victims who took loan from Ram Bhai and did not pay the exorbitant interest promptly. It was an easy job which gave him lots of time to go drinking and gambling. He used to feel alive only after his blood was drowning in alcohol and was contented living in solitude until he met this girl. She turned his world upside down by awakening desires that he never knew existed.
He reasoned with himself that he was not worthy of her and that he was too messed up. But the feelings for her grew stronger with each passing moment and he did not think it was possible for him to hold it back in. It was obvious she reciprocate his feelings by her blushes and gestures. This silly girl did not know what she was getting herself into. She was plainly as lovestruck as him.
End of flashback
Part 2
She stepped into the hospital and paced anxiously outside the room. She needed him to take the test and for the miracle that she was praying to happen. When half an hour passed and she was informed that he did not show up, she did not know what to feel. Maybe she should have told him the truth, perhaps he would have come. But she feared that disappointment would engulf her if he did not turn up even then. She did not think she could endure the certainty that he had truly cast them away. The scars that he left her with did not even heal and now she was again feeling broken inside. She closed her eyes and the tears streamed down as her mind replayed their moments together.
Flashback
When she first met him, she was struck with guilt for causing his accident and filled with curiosity as he was a mystery. He barely acknowledged her presence and was almost wordless throughout their interaction. That night she had stayed up in bed thinking about him and visited him the next day after her college. She bet he already has a girlfriend looking after him since he has this rugged charm and was half-expecting her to appear when she rang the door bell. She was greeted by his bewildered expression and he had requested her to leave. She had barged in and nagged him into eating and somehow things just gradually progressed between them.
He appeared amused by her conversations but rarely participated in them. He said that he preferred to hear her stories as his story was filled with darkness. Sometimes when she came, he was covered in bruises and she treated them without questions. Occasionally he would have to leave immediately after a phone call. She wondered about his life but he was tight-lipped about it so she never pried.
Initially she thought he always occupied her mind because she was curious about him but after a while she realised she loved him. She wondered if he felt anything for her since he always lamented that she should get away from him. And one day she decided not to stop by his place thinking he would contact her and was disheartened when he did not. She told herself not to visit him again until he called her but she missed being with him so much that she had impulsively gone there. Even though he did not articulate them, she saw the relief in his eyes and happiness shone in them when he saw her. That was enough for her somehow.
It was only after they had known each other for six months that he shared with her about his life. He told her she was the first person that ever genuinely cared for him and she had cried for this lonely boy who was so uncertain of his value. His mother abused him and his savior turned him into an abuser. He had promised her that he would get away from it all and be someone worthy of her by the time she graduated. She was going to be done with college in six months and was looking forward to starting her life with him.
She even told her aunt and uncle who looked after her back home that she was not coming back after she graduated since she was getting married. She promised them that she would repay the expenses they had spent on her and knew that was more important for them anyway. They had always been vocal about her being a burden but they could not abandon her since she was their niece. Even though she did resent them slightly for always belittling her and making her feel unwanted, she was immensely grateful that they took her in so that she did not end up like Yash. But he had promised her to be a better man and she believed him only to find out that in the end it was all a lie. All he had to do was get away from the gang but he chose to get away from her instead.
End of Flashback
Yash stepped into the hospital building one hour after his supposed appointment and insisted that they took his blood test. The nurse in attendant knew how critical the patient needed a matching bone marrow and Yash was someone with higher probability since he was related so she relented. Yash looked around trying to spot Aarti but she was nowhere to be found. He did not know why he bothered coming but his legs had its own mind.
"What is this transplant about?" he enquired the nurse, clueless with the jargons Aarti had thrown at him yesterday.
The nurse then went on to explain to him about leukaemia and the bone marrow treatment that would help these patients have a new lease of life. When the blood test was over, she told him that they would inform him within three days if he was a matching donor. He wanted to see Aarti so he tried his luck asking the nurse if she knew Aarti. Yash was surprised when the middle-aged lady told him which ward he could locate Aarti and even offered to write it down since it was in another tower.
"Your daughter is there too," she added as she passed him the paper.
"What?"
"You are her father right? It was stated that you are the biological father in the form Ms Aarti Dubey filled up."
"What?"
The nurse realised her error and quickly covered it up that she had made a mistake and confused him with someone else. She even grabbed the paper from his hand and told she did not know any Aarti.
He stood in the chair paralysed with the revelation. Did she keep the baby all this while? He was a father? His daughter was dying? There was too much information to take in and he needed a beer badly. But he was in need to see how his daughter looked like more so he made his way to the ward that the nurse mentioned.
He dragged his feet as he got closer to the room, his heart beat unsteady, his palms clammy and beads of perspiration on his forehead. He peered into the room and saw Aarti seated on the bed hugging a young little girl who was on her lap. The little girl was in hospital clothes, wore a beanie and was in tears as she rested her head against Aarti's chest. She was the most adorable thing, with big round curious eyes, a pouting mouth although she appeared a little pale. A tsunami of emotions swept him as he watched them. Tears stung his eyes as he thought of how he could almost have a perfect family if he had not been so weak. He walked towards them slowly and uncertain what he hoped to achieve by making his presence known.
"I want to go home," their daughter complained.
"You can go home after you get better ok?" Aarti said and kissed Payal's forehead.
"When? When? When? I do not like it here."
Aarti smiled at her brave child and almost choked on the tears that she held back. Payal was being cranky today after the radiation treatment and she knew her chirpy and lively daughter wanted to run around and create havoc. She took after Aarti and was always boisterous and talkative. But the days cooped up in the hospital and the treatments were sucking her energy away. They still have not found a donor for her and they had been searching for the past year. Her condition was now critical and if they did not find a donor soon, she was afraid she would lose her daughter forever. She hugged Payal tight and prayed for a miracle to happen. Maybe she should confess the facts to Yash and hoped that there was a streak of humanity left in to do her this favour.
"Who are you?" Payal asked and Aarti looked up to see the man her daughter was talking to. She was stunned to see Yash approaching them hesitantly. She saw it in his eyes that he knew Payal was his daughter. Who could have told him? He looked at her questioningly with a tinge of anger and she did not know what to say.
"Who are you?" Payal repeated herself.
Yash gazed at Payal for a long time and Aarti held her breath. She did not know what Yash would say. Payal always thought her father was dead.
"Ask your mother," he answered coolly and turned his attention to Aarti. She swallowed. She was not prepared for this. She had gone to him only to save her daughter. What was he doing here? He said he never wanted them! She could still remember her heart breaking into a million pieces when he ended everything with her.
Flashback
"But you said we were going to get married after my last paper. I have finished my last paper yesterday."
"Yash, why are you not saying anyting?"
"Yash, say something please?" She was beginning to get nervous. He had just told her that it was over between them and he did not want the baby. What did he mean by that? They did not even quarrel. He had said just yesterday that they would get married today since she was pregnant. Initially, they planned to get married after he found a new job but the baby changed the plans.
"I have said all there is to say. I do not want you and the baby. You are barely two months pregnant so please abort the baby and continue with your life."
Tears flowed from her eyes uncontrollably and she begged him to tell her that it was a joke. This was not the Yash that she knew. He has been excited about the baby. It was just not possible.
"Yash...Please...Tell me this is not real...I love you..."she sobbed.
He sniggered. "This is the end and do not look for me again." He stood up from the bench in the park and walked away.
She called out to him. It hurt her so much with every step he took and she kept on shouting hoping he would turn back. But he only kept getting farther away and she stood there waiting until her tears were empty.
End of Flashback
"I think this man made a mistake. He meant to go to another room. I will show him where that room is. You wait a while for Mama ok Payal," Aarti said and quickly got off the bed and pulled Yash out of the room.
"What are you trying to do?" she hissed at him. "Did you take the blood test?"
"Why?"
She looked at the band-aid on his arm and knew that he had taken the test. Please let him be a matching donor.
"Thank you for doing this. The hospital will contact you if you can be her donor. You gave them you mobile number right? So please leave."
"Why?"
She did not know what he was talking about and tried to make her way back to Payal's room when Yash grabbed her arm. His touch burnt her skin and she pulled her hand from him.
"Why?"
She glared at him. What right does he have to question her?
"What why? Do you think I am as heartless as you to kill my own child? You must have not known me at all Yash! Just like how I did not know you could be callous! We probably saw what we wanted in each other! And do not dare to step in front of her again. Her father is dead the day he left her mother. Your child died the day you told her mother to kill her," she said, her tone filled with contempt.
He embraced her and gazed into her eyes without saying anything. They both knew the unspoken feelings did not fade away. Then he let her go and turned away to leave. She walked back to their daughter's room and hoped never to see him again after the surgery if he was eligible. Her fragile heart could not handle anymore heartaches.
He collapsed in his bed and wondered why only darkness loomed in his life? The gallon of beer that he had consumed could not keep his thoughts away from his daughter. Aarti was right. But why does he yearn to hug that little girl? To see how she looked like when she smile? To hear her calling him Papa? What was wrong with him? Seeing that child evoked feelings he thought he had buried when he left Aarti. He had wanted to step out from this lifestyle but he was indebted to Ram Bhai and was always emotionally blackmailed to help out with one last favour. Unfortunately the last favour ended him with arson charges and the police were looking for him the day he was supposed to marry her. He did not want to embroil her in his ruined life only to have unintentionally ruined hers.
He was not a believer but that night he prayed that he was eligible to be Payal's bone marrow donor. He promised himself that he would not torment Aarti anymore since she had erased him from hers and Payal's lives. He would simply go through the surgery and never see them again. At least a part of him would be with his daughter always. He closed his eyes with an empty feeling in his heart.
Bade Achhe Lagte Hain
Anupamaa
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
