The Bride With A Doll...Removed/ A/N on Pg 42 :) - Page 28

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palo101 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
12 year old married ...aww...sounds very interesting
ashw99 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
This is awesome...
waiting for the updates.
YaSha0512 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Interesting start
Can't wait for story to unfold
Thanks for pm plz keep em comin n continue soon
IPK007 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
A/N

I have removed this story from IF, anyone who wishes to read it can contact me at Jennifermilford11@yahoo.com

Love,

Jenny :)
Edited by IPK007 - 10 years ago
Anarocksick thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
RES 😃
------------
Edited:

I can't even being to explain how beautiful this story is, Jenny! Your narration makes me visualize what you write, and that is such a treat, I tell you.

Arnab's character is so well sketched. There were so many such men under the British Raj living under the same dilemma as he. I would call him the ideal youth of that time. And yet, he's not able to do much as he lives under his aristocratic father who rather favours the British Raj.

The conversation between him and his father was quite intense. I feel for Arnab. Even his mother doesn't do anything to show her support. I'm sure his mother wants to support him, but is too much in control of his father... who obviously is the lord of the house. And his father's mannerism and behavior is much like the English. Pity.

I like thammi. She's wise, intelligent, and more than anything, seems like a nice person, at least, much better than his father.

You're playing with seasons here again, Jen. Arnab is distressed about the situations around him, and the last thing he needs is a child bride. But in comes little Khushi with the first rains of monsoon... I see what you did there!

I feel so bad for Khushi though. She has lost everything she had... all except her Arnab. Hope the monsoons bring lots of happiness and love in both their lives.

P.s- I'm Bengali. And I'm beginning to like Arnab Basu Mallick a hell lot. 😃
Edited by Anarocksick - 12 years ago
kondhili thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Res 😊
Double treat by Jenny...🥳

**Edited**
Wow jenny i am blown away by the lovely narrative that i just read. You have spinned the Raj era so beautifully for us.
The poverty driven aam aadmi at the railway station, the grandeur of the haveli right down to the bygone days fan.
You captured the essence of that era very very beautifully.

I liked the young Khushi sitting along with just 'roopa' for accompany having lost everyone whom she holds dear but instead of being sad, withdrawn and upset with life in general she is looking forward to meeting her only beacon of hope her husband Arnab.

I loved this arnab who is forthright a man with conscious and who is affected by the pain that people around him are going through.
I want to applaud the fact that he has the courage to stand upto his father for what he thinks is the right way ahead...and is not letting his father's wealth dictate how he envisage life ahead for himself and his country.

Loved his relationship with his dadi too, so just like the show...his mannerism seem to be inherited a lot from this spunky lady.

But 13 yrs thats a very big age gap...but i guess that was how things worked at that time and khushi is already at the doorstep of her hubby's home sooner than expected.

I am geared Jen to know how this arnab and khushi will meet, get acquainted and fall in love eventually...

P.S: After the vivid description jen all i can say is YC bani SLB...


Edited by kondhili - 12 years ago
pixiegirl thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Aww, Jenny, you don't have to thank me, my help was negligible, so minuscule not even worth a mention, but thank you anyways 🤗

Jenny, I am truly speechless after reading the opening chapter of this period story... The way you have captured the essence of the lifestyle of the zamindars in Calcutta during the Raj in pre-independence India is absolutely astounding...

It was so beautifully described that I felt like I was watching it on screen... The grandeur of the havelis, their attires & lifestyle was just perfectly depicted...

The young Arnab Mallick seems to be a conscientious, intelligent & patriotic youth a few traits that have eluded his own father... The father son tiff was absolutely reminiscent of dissent amongst the youth from their seniors at that time, who having been spoilt by the comforts of luxury would resist change even if that change was towards the independence of their own motherland from the British rule..

Arnab's thami seems to be quite a matriarch... Looks like her genes passed on directly to her grandson bypassing her own son... 😆 Loved her for her candor & intelligence...

Poor Khushi, the only silver lining in her life right now seems to be her husband... 13 years is a huge gap between the two... Not sure whether your story would go to the extent of showing Khushi as an older girl or not but right now she is just a child bride clutching a doll in her hands..

Waiting to see how you unfold the story hope it will not end tragically... Keep writing!
Edited by pixiegirl - 12 years ago
AquaSandhya thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Jenny, that truly is an amazing story you are telling.

The Seting against the backdrop of India's struggle for Freedom, old-world Calcutta, the richness of the haveli...the dire conditions of people at the train station is STUNNING.

Characters - I loved the Arnab who despite his upbringin in his world of havelis, barristers, riches and power craves to fight for India.

I loved the dad who just wants to make money and have the power by supporting Brits, the docile mum, the understanding grandmother and most important of all Khushi. Yes Khushi, who has lost it all yet is so strong by thinking about the one positive thing in her life, Arnab. beautiful charcaterization.

Symbolism - I loved the doll that has come to become so yours. For me the doll, is Jenny. Bas.

Themes - Freedom fighting, child marraige and justice and hope. Amazing.

Loved it, enjoyed it and look forward to it.
Edited by AquaSandhya - 12 years ago
Anupama. thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
R.
Edited.
Jen, you rockstar! You know that right!
This is so intelligent and I loved this vividness. From fabric pankha to oil lamp to clothes and rolled up screens to rain and railway and doll.. You have captured it all here like a reel. I can literally say that I am watching this.

The characterization of every character was so true and real as different kinds.. in accordance with that time..
Brilliant Jenny!
Me too felt a pang with that last scene.. She is a child-that doll makes it being realized with a stinging ability. And she,even after, loosing everything has that positiveness that Arnabji is hers..of which she might not even understand the depth right now.
Edited by Anupama. - 12 years ago
ASRphanki thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Oh wow...
Wat a wonderful start jenny...arnab babu nd khushi ...
The age gap is so big...nd it was prevelant durin dat time in india...
Eager to see how the story develops

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