USA Marriages

Why are people so eager to marry their children in foreign countries? Its like parents are marrying their kids to the country, not the person.

I live in the US with my parents and 19 year old brother. We have been getting proposals for him since he turned sixteen and visited India. People have gone to the extent of having the girl come over when we visit some family and make ridulous promises of cars and money and etc. And yesterday a guy visiting form India (my aunts uncle) also asked for us to marry my brother to his daughter and because we don't want to hurt my aunts feeling we don't know what to say. Once again he promises that we well get whatever we wish for. My family is very well off and we really don't care for cars or money because each member of my family is getting a new car for their birthday this year of their choose and we alredy each have our own car that we like. So we don't care about getting stuff as dowery and since when has marriages become more about money then love?

Why have Indians forgotten about love??


-Rimpy

because their indians, no offence to anyone but its tru, well atleast in my opinion. from what ive cn marriages are sooo difficult. first u have to look at the fact that they actually are indian and then the ridiculous caste thing that everyone is so worried about. both of these i think is pointless. if someone really loves another person, i think that they should be together. and we should not act in the typical manner which indian behave in...as for dowry, another backwards indian tihng. i think its just lame, like the same thing happened to me when i wend to india at the age of 13. shit i was only 13 years old and ppl were comming to make rishtas 😕 for the future. i agree with u, marriage should just be about being with the person u love!

Originally posted by: j y o t i

because their indians, no offence to anyone but its tru, well atleast in my opinion. from what ive cn marriages are sooo difficult. first u have to look at the fact that they actually are indian and then the ridiculous caste thing that everyone is so worried about. both of these i think is pointless. if someone really loves another person, i think that they should be together. and we should not act in the typical manner which indian behave in...as for dowry, another backwards indian tihng. i think its just lame, like the same thing happened to me when i wend to india at the age of 13. shit i was only 13 years old and ppl were comming to make rishtas 😕 for the future. i agree with u, marriage should just be about being with the person u love!

I am punjabi so we don't look at the whole cast thing. But I agree with you, its because they are Indians that live in India. I mean we are Indians also but we don't think like them.

-Rimpy

see, in India and Pakistan, if ur from America or u live in America, then they think of u as special. That's why they want to get their daughters or sisters married off w/ someone in America. That happens to everyone. When my family went to Pakistan, my sister was like only 14, and she got a rishta. i mean, what is a 14 year old gonna do with a rishta?? 😕 😕

Originally posted by: punjabi#1

since when has marriages become more about money then love?

Why have Indians forgotten about love??

-Rimpy

"whats love got to do with it" lol (i dun kow where this quotes from but it seems to fit into this discussion.)

throughout history in ever civilization (including india) love has been the last reason to get married, cold hard economics and other reasons have been the reasons behind marriages.

it not about being special, many people in india are very poor, farmers are commiting suicide because of debt, they have debt because of bad harvests. marrying your kid to an american citizen means your kids can live a better life, send money back to save family from debt AND many bring over the rest of the family. lots of these marriges work out fine. unfortunatly some don't becuase couples are mismacthed and problems occur. some problems end in divorce some go to the other extreme of violence (abuse and death).

love is great but its a luxury, its easier to do when u live in comfort, but many people india don't have that luxury.

Originally posted by: j y o t i

because their indians, no offence to anyone but its tru, well atleast in my opinion. from what ive cn marriages are sooo difficult. first u have to look at the fact that they actually are indian and then the ridiculous caste thing that everyone is so worried about. both of these i think is pointless. if someone really loves another person, i think that they should be together. and we should not act in the typical manner which indian behave in...as for dowry, another backwards indian tihng. i think its just lame, like the same thing happened to me when i wend to india at the age of 13. shit i was only 13 years old and ppl were comming to make rishtas 😕 for the future. i agree with u, marriage should just be about being with the person u love!

in the old dayz people got married young, i guess the people u met must have foolishly think the marriage at 13 is still ok. oh and i think there many things to consider before getting marrried then mere love. but then again i not sure of your definition of love.

Originally posted by: punjabi#1

I am punjabi so we don't look at the whole cast thing. But I agree with you, its because they are Indians that live in India. I mean we are Indians also but we don't think like them.

-Rimpy

i disgree i;m punjabi and religon and caste do play a factor, (even amoung sikhs which i am)

as for thinking, you cant't label everyone in the west as thinking one thing and india as another, in many instances indians in the wese can be MORE traditional/conservative then there counterparts in india, and vice versa.

Originally posted by: Singh23

i disgree i;m punjabi and religon and caste do play a factor, (even amoung sikhs which i am)

as for thinking, you cant't label everyone in the west as thinking one thing and india as another, in many instances indians in the wese can be MORE traditional/conservative then there counterparts in india, and vice versa.

I am also a Sikh and castes never played a part in my life.

I agree that the Indians in other country at time tend to be more traditional at times but we are more open minded and our open to changing some traditions. In India people tend to not follow traditions or follow them to the tiniest thing.

-Rimpy

Originally posted by: Singh23

"whats love got to do with it" lol (i dun kow where this quotes from but it seems to fit into this discussion.)

throughout history in ever civilization (including india) love has been the last reason to get married, cold hard economics and other reasons have been the reasons behind marriages.

it not about being special, many people in india are very poor, farmers are commiting suicide because of debt, they have debt because of bad harvests. marrying your kid to an american citizen means your kids can live a better life, send money back to save family from debt AND many bring over the rest of the family. lots of these marriges work out fine. unfortunatly some don't becuase couples are mismacthed and problems occur. some problems end in divorce some go to the other extreme of violence (abuse and death).

love is great but its a l<SPAN>uxury, its easier to do when u live in comfort, but many people india don't have that l<SPAN>uxury.</SPAN></SPAN>

all the people that have brought proposals to my house have been rich. I understand the poor and their troubles, infact my family is building a water tank in our home town so everyone can have clean water to drink and then our planning to built a better school. But I don't understand is rich people trying to marry their girls to people in America or Canada, why can't they find love?

-Rimpy

Originally posted by: ~Unforgettable~

see, in India and Pakistan, if ur from America or u live in America, then they think of u as special. That's why they want to get their daughters or sisters married off w/ someone in America. That happens to everyone. When my family went to Pakistan, my sister was like only 14, and she got a rishta. i mean, what is a 14 year old gonna do with a rishta?? 😕 😕

you are right, they don't see age they see America and money


-Rimpy