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Hey,
I don't know who u are. i just came across this story of yours. After I finished reading, I felt as if this in Chapter 1 has a different touch in it.
You changed the Chapter 1 now. Clearly, the difference is evident. It's more mature, collected and perfect. It doesn't look like you have done it.
It looks way different than your original Chapter 1. It's wrong in IF if use someone else's thoughts without proper credit to the person who is helping you, may it be you family member or someone in IF.
If this continues, your story will be declared Plagiarised by the MOD's and your account will be closed before it is trashed.
Don't copy someone wlse's work and claim it as your own. Stop this or I'll report it to the MOD's. This is wrong!
Bye