hi friends,
first time i am writing an os in this forum. hope u like it. tell me if it good or bad..
All is Lost
Did you ever felt that you are running behind a thing which you will never get? Are you scared to open your eyes thinking that all those happening to you is a dream and if you wake up, it will burst like bubbles? Well... Zoya always felt that way...Being an orphan wasn't her choice, but she was forced to live that way. With apparently no one else to take care of, she had learnt to live in terms with the bitter truth of her life. She was happy, at least outside. She would lock down her inner turmoil deep inside the heart and wear the mask of an extrovert. It always protected her from the cruel world who mocks at others miseries. But today, she realises, it's the only think which separates her from the only man she ever loved, Asad Ahmed Khan... her own Mr. Six Pack abs... He believed her mask to be the real Zoya and refused to understand her...She can't blame him though... isn't it what she wanted???
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She walked through the lonely road with a broken heart, tears continuously flowing from her once expressive eyes, completely lost in another world... she closed her eyes as to let the pain engulf her. All she could hear was Asad's shouting:
"How dare you Ms. Farooqi? How dare you... I don't want to see your face. Just get lost"
She opened her eyes only to realise that she is alone. Her mind and heart were playing tricks on her. Her feet carried her to the nearest Dhargah letting her to cherish the moments she had in that house, Asad's house, Phoopi and Najma's house...
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Asad paced through the hospital corridors like a wounded tiger. He was fully consumed with rage, rage towards God for trying to snatch away his Ammi, rage towards himself for not being there when his family was attacked and rage towards Zoya for putting all the people he love at risk. Zoya... the same Zoya for whom he fought with death and brought back to life, the same Zoya for whom in spite the initial bickering his heart warmed up to, the same Zoya in whom he found the light in darkness... And because of the same Zoya, his Ammi was in danger. Had Zoya send Mariam away as he instructed, all this would not have happened...
The mere thought of her lying to him over the phone double folded his anger. The girl had done a grave mistake and yet showed the audacity to speak to him. To the person who is in the verge of losing his existence, his Ammi... that moment, he was not THE Asad Ahmed Khan who has his own set of principles and #morale. Instead, he was just a son who has seen his Ammi in pain and cares a hoot about the set of principles he have woven around himself. He did what everyone would have done at that moment... he slapped her... real hard... without even throwing a glance towards her, he walked away... he didn't wanted to know in what condition she is, he give a damn about her...
His thoughts were interrupted by a nurse who informed him that His Ammi is out of danger. He ran towards the ICU to see her... to see her alive... too see her opening her eyes... to see her smiling... above all, to see her taking his name... he stopped for a moment and prayed to the Almighty for saving his Ammi...
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One month had passed since that day... Dilshad had recovered and she was discharged from hospital. Everything was back to normal. Was it really? No... Nothing was normal in that house. No one was happy there... how they could be happy when the girl who spread the happiness in their life is not with them, Zoya...
One month... it's been one whole month since she had left the house... No one saw her leaving. No one knew where she is. All they knew is that she is not going to come back... why should she comeback when all she gets in return is hatred and blaming...
Asad was no more the same Asad Ahmed Khan. He became more withdrawn from the world. Dilshad & Najma was soo sad seeing their beloved in that state. They knew, only Zoya can break that shell... but where to find her and even if they found her, will she come back were the biggest question marks in front of them.
Asad still remembered the day he lost Zoya... Perhaps forever... he didn't once think about her innocence before shouting at her and slapping her. It was from his Ammi he came to know that his Zoya was innocent. He was stunned at the revelation. As the day's events drawn on him, he realised the seriousness of what he had done. He drove to his home like a maniac in the hope of seeing her. He had decided to apologise her keeping aside his ego. He wanted to say sorry to her for the each and every situation he had insulted her, scolded her and misunderstood her... he wanted to give up his pretense of not realising the feelings he has for her... he just wanted to hug her real bad and not letting her go... he just wanted to kiss away her tears...her all pain...
God was never in his favour and why would he make exception this time? He didn't... And there stood Asad, staring at the empty room, empty house trying to digest the fact that she had left him... she was gone... to be found nowhere... and why should she stay when there is no reason for her to...
Asad was brought back to the reality by the door bell. He wiped his blood shot eyes and opened the door. It was a parcel. He received the parcel and closed the door. He slowly opened the parcel only to see a paper inside. It was a letter... from Zoya... his heart started beating frantically... happiness, sadness, every emotion was in his face. A tear rolled down his cheek as his gaze fell upon her handwriting. Breathing deeply he started reading that letter.
Dear Asad,
Well... I don't know whether I can call you that. Especially after what happened to Phupi... I swear on my Ammi that I never wanted any harm to touch our family... I mean... Your family... Your Ammi and Najma is like my own... How can I put them at danger?
I didn't lie to you Asad. I did send Mariam away as per your instructions. It was Phupi who brought her back. I never intended to bring problem to your perfect life... it just my bad luck that in the process of helping others, more problems are created.
I knew, it was entirely my fault. Had I been not come to your house as a guest, all these problems would not have happen. I am angry with myself for running away from the marriage with Akram on that day. That is the root cause for everything na... at least all others could have been happy...
I am going Mr. Khan... far away from all of your lives... I don't want to create more problems to you... I never wished this... any of these... all I ever wanted was to belong somewhere... To have someone... To love some one... To belong to some one... I guess it's too much to ask for...
I wish you believed me Mr. Kan... believed me when I told you that I had send Mariam away... but how can i forget that you never ever had trust on me... it not the slap which hurts me, but it's the your lack of trust on me... everything is my fault because I am a girl, right Mr. Khan?
I wanted to tell you all these things personally. But I am scared... scared that you won't understand me and push me away... I won't be able to handle that rejection. Everywhere I faced rejection. My Ammi rejected the idea of taking me with her while dying. My Abbu rejected my existence and is nowhere to be found... And you... you reject me over and over again... so it thought this is the best way to tell you good bye.
Please tell Phupi and Najma that they are the best things that happened to me in a very long time... And I love them a lot...
I know I am really late in writing this letter, but trust me, this is not that easy... I cannot complete this without telling you one thing... that... I Love You... I love you a lot... I have realised my feelings for you during the Mangalpur fiasco... after that i tried to change myself for you, but all in vain... and now... I lost the last bit of hope... Hope that you too will love me back... the way you reacted in the hospital made me realised that I'm a fool... a fool for hoping for something which was never meant to be mine... it's ok Mr. Khan... I have learnt to live like this... I assure you, from now onwards I won't cause any problem in your life... i promise, you won't hear from me again. I have only one request... Please don't think of me as a bad girl... I am not that bad Mr. Khan... not that bad...
Zoya
Asad stared at the letter in his trembling hands... tears that were flowing continuously from his eyes had already soaked the letter. He screamed in agony as all the beautiful moments spent with her started replaying in his mind only to realise that he had lost her...forever...
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