Hey,
Yeah okay, I know I am on a writing break, and have exams in a months time, but then what do you do after a teary episode of IPK and a 6 hour stretch studying of World History?
Anyways, couldnt possibly stop myself from writing this, must be a big whole load of crap, which I dont personally like, but anyways thought of posting it, since well keeping to stuff to yourself specially about ArHi is really not my thing.
Pleasant Reading everyone.🤗
OS: Lawless
Her eyes were smudged with the makeup that was draining out of them, which only hours earlier had been lavishly adorned all around her eyes by her elder sister. She stared into the blank space before her, the red and orange flame of fire gone, only remains of a smoke that showed that it had once been there, leaving behind a hollow space not only in the black box but also in her heart. Khushi's pupils continued to dilate and constrict in an odd fashion her gaze penetrating deep in the ashes in front of her, the ashes that she could connect with her own shredded life.
Clutching the sides of her green and pink colored lehenga, her sight lingered away from the grayness of the ashness to the vividness of the colors she was sporting in her dress. The Apple Green. The Rose Pink. The Pastel Shade. It brought memories to her, that she had never forgotten, a memory that she had cherished last night, a memory that she had cursed in the beginning, felt sad to have lived through later, and now that she let her eyes focus on the blur of the three colors, there was no mistaking about what she was thinking. That night. The night at Lucknow, that fateful night at Sheesh Mahal, when she had met him- Arnav Singh Raizada.
He looked at her, with all the intensity he could muster up, scrutinizing every detail of her. She looked back at him, with her eyes wide open, scared of the intensity of his gaze. It affected her so much, that she tripped on her own foot, her other feet landing on the pastel shaded dupatta that caused her to slip and fall off the ramp. He cushioned her fall, as he let her land into his arms clutching the back of his neck with her soft palms. She gazed into his eyes, looking deep into his soul with such innocence, that it somewhat healed some of the pain he was currently feeling. The party bombs blasted somewhere near them, which caused the girl to jump up in his arms, making her clutch his hair harder. She was capturing him, and he did not like the effect one single bit on himself. Everything was in control or so was shown as he let her go roughly, causing her to stumble awkwardly and grab onto the edge of the ramp for support. She turned around swiftly to look at him, fear clearly distinct in her eyes. He gave the nearby security the "look" which caused them to drag her away from him. As they dragged her duppata still firmly caught under his shoe, slide down from her head as the guards pulled her away, giving him access to see her bear back laced with a string of pearls, her sharply turning back and looking at him like a doe who had lost her path. That moment was that one when the security dragged her away from him far far away, when she realized, it wasn't the end to their meet, it never was the end, somewhere she just knew,- this was the beginning.
As the flashback of that night ended her mind froze to see her elder sister leaning next to her with a more tear stricken face than her own, fear and sorrow evidently clouding her face, but this only made her insides tremble with uncontrollable horror. She continued to look in the lost eyes of her sister, but the more she looked, the more she found a tight knot of uncertainty building up in her throat, a raging question hammering inside her head. What if he didn't come? What was she going to do then?
"Jiji, what if he doesn't come? What am I going to do then?" She voiced her thoughts loudly to her sister, whose sight turned more blurry than required providing her no hope, no light to expect something better, she could see it in the silence of Payal's eyes, her life was cursed, because her black was now gone.
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The starry night came out to haunt him as he looked above at it, his eyes blurry due to the tears that were threatening to roll down his cheeks, however his jaws clenched and features drawn inside did not let the tears that continued to sting have their way with him. Atleast they would not be able to have their way. He thought to himself helplessly. Everything had spun out of terrible control in just a matter of hours, what was just the most blissful desired last night, had exactly 24 hours later turned into his worst nightmare. The horror of his grandmother's words struck him and he shivered, shivered so hard he could almost feel himself rattle with cold.
Arnav's eyes drooped low, and he shut them tight to block out the images that were polluting his mind only to make the situation for himself worse than before, a lot more worse than he could even began to put into words. His mothers marred painful sobs, his own yelling, the shreds of his innocence lieing tattered somewhere amongst the white draped people that surrounded him, his angst of being thrown out of his own house by his uncle. But then it all had changed, over the years from just a helpless lone 15 year old boy, he had developed into a mean, ruthless, self -centered business man who hated the world for everything it was. That was all that was one year before until that night when he had met the most innocent soul on earth and everything from then on had changed once again. It was the third phase of his life. She came she went, she changed him, there were lows there were highs, there up and downs, there were tears and happiness, hatred and love everything went to two extreme sides and yet again right now sitting on the small wooden bench, he was on the road where either side would be a lose lose situation for him.
He could only think about it, if he married her that would be forgiving the women responsible for his and his Di's treacherous past life, if he did not marry her that would mean his life completely shattered into bits all over again, however there was one thing crucial about this decision, the decision of leaving Khushi- this time there was no space for repair.
His thoughts churned inside his head in a hap hazard manner, making him groan with sickness, the blood inside getting drier as it lost the moist to it. Suddenly his eyes fell on the rose bush ahead the one he had brought her to see two days ago. He remembered her painful smile seeing his hurt, he remembered how she had hugged him into condolence only because she loved him. He remembered that she had requested him to bring her here after they got married. Married. Married. His thoughts froze on the word, recalling all the dreams she had woven, the dreams his sister had woven the dreams he had woven. That is when he actually realized that not marrying her was never an option. He had bullied her into marrying the first time, made her subject to endless brutality from his own side, and humiliation from his family, and still after everything he had done he still had the audacity to think that that marrying her was an option and not a compulsion?
"Khushi, tumhe mujh sein shaadi karni hogey, 6 mahiney key liye, warna main tumahri behen ki shaadi mere bhai key saath nahin hone dun ga"
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Before she even knew, he was there dragging her into the temple, throwing her out in front of Devi Maiyan, filling her 'mang' with red vermilion, tying the sacred golden and black necklace around her neck, having made her his wife, in what was just a matter of seconds.
"Ab aglein chehein mahiney key liye hum pati patni hain. Laikin yeh mat samjhna key tum mere patni hun, tumhein who hone ka haq kabhi nahin mil sakta"
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"Because you have no character!" he screamed at her, shaking her poor form who was in complete bewilderement, he could half feel her legs collapsing underneath due to the force of his words, but he didn't care, she was the one who had betrayed, it was all her fault, all her fault.
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"App ko ais baat ka tab pata chala ga, jab hum nahin hogey"
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"Arnav ji is dunya key sab sein ache pati hain"
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"Jab tum mere paas hoti hun, tou tumharein dil key saath saath mere dil ki dharkane bhi mil jaate hain, humarein dil key dharkane aik hojati hain"
"Humarein dil ki dharkane'"
"Aik hojati hain"
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"Khushi wadda karun key tum mujhe chor kar nahin jao gey. *pause* Main tumharein bagair jee nahin paoo ga"
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"Mazaq me mein bhi aise baat kabhi mat karyein ga. Nahin! Humein aisa mazaq bilkul bhi pasand nahin, agar aap ne humein chor diya tou hum..tou hum..maar jaye gey"
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Arnav stopped thinking right at that moment, all the other things flying away from his mind at the last sentence. In all the hatred, in all the extremeness of his past life, he had forgotten that she too was something. He had just sidelined about what she would be thinking right now, her dependence on him, how far they had come in their relationship, they had to come to a point where there was no turning back, and that's what he thought too before Dadi told him the truth wasn't it? That is what it was, then why was he letting something that had happened ages ago hamper his life? What if he didn't go, what would she do then? Die?
He buried his hand inside his palms, letting the tears unleash out of his tear glands, finally having lost his control over them. He blamed himself for not knowing enough, when their parents died, he blamed himself for a lot of things, the last thing needed was another blame, the blame to be the reason his love, his Khushi is killed. Even the thought of it made him numb with fear, the terror of everything was so intense to take in, he felt himself in need for oxygen but was that enough to keep him alive?
Frustration combined with oodles of anger he got up from his seat and threw the bench around in fit of anger, screaming his lungs out in the mist of wilderness where he was standing in. The tremor, the shiver down his spine let go of him as he completely collapsed to the ground cursing himself for his selfishness, for his arrogance, for his rowdiness, but mostly for his luck. His black luck. He wanted to know why he was that, why he was undeniably cowardly, or was he even cowardly? The truth scared him, he wasn't cowardly, he wanted to tell himself, but there was no reasonable explanation elsewhere to describe his actions, until suddenly like a wave of lightening it hit him, hit him hard, the truth of that justified it all he was not cowardly; he was just human.
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P.S: So how was it? Hope not too marred with imperfections, didnt know what in the world I had penned down, but anyways had to post it so did that.
Anybody wanting links to my other works, check out my index.
Leave back your likes and comments behind if this is worth it.😳
Love,
Batool😳
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