Arhi FF:Mirage #2 Next thread link on Pg 151 - Page 66

Two whole days had passed by just like that. Nothing had changed except for that fact that Khushi found herself all alone at the Kashyap's house after Lavanya started attending college. She would leave at eight in the morning and return back at five in the evening. During that duration, Khushi would simply lie down on her bed and stare blankly at the ceiling. She tried to move ahead with life but somehow she couldn't.

Memories of Buaji invaded her idle mind at the slightest opportunity. She had tried convincing herself that her Aunt was dead. Gone forever. But her mind simply refused to accept this.

Frustration, anger, irritation, guilt. Everything filled her mind driving her insane.

She didn't know where to go, what to do. Her future seemed stagnant.

She was aware that Lavanya was trying her best to help her out from this situation, but it somehow wasn't working out.

Khushi wanted to go back home, alone, away from everyone. She wanted to cry, breakdown, let all those painful memories flow out of her. But she simply couldn't. There was something holding them back inside her.

That evening when Lavanya returned back from the college, Khushi decided to inform her about her decision that she had taken after pondering over her current situation for the entire afternoon.

"Lavanya," she called out to her friend who was seated in front of the dressing mirror, wiping away the eyeliner from her eyes.

"Yes Khushi?" she said turning around to face her friend.

"I've decided to go back to my house." she said calmly. She could see Lavanya gape at her in shock. "But..." Lavanya protested only to be interjected by Khushi. "I know you are all concerned about me and I'm thankful to you and Hari Uncle for taking care of me." She paused before resuming. "But I cannot live here forever. You have your own life to lead and I have my own. Therefore, I need to start afresh a new life for myself. I will not be able to move ahead unless I accept the situation whole heartedly. And for that I need to go back to my house. I hope you understand my situation."

Lavanya paused for a minute after hearing her friend's decision. Thinking about it, she replied back smilingly, "If that is what will make you happy, then fine, I won't stop you. But if you need any help from me, you can be assured that I will be there for you." She came forward to hug Khushi.

"Thanks Lavanya. You really are the best friend in the whole world." Khushi replied hugging back tightly.

"So when are you planning to go back?" Lavanya asked pulling back from their hug.

"Most probably tonight, after dinner."

"Well, then I'll tell the driver to drop you back home." Lavanya replied before running downstairs to inform her Dad.

o0o

"Sir, are you hundred percent sure you had that file with you?" a man clad in black suit asked the elder man who was seated on his chair, with a worried expression on his face.

"Yes, I'm damn sure about it. I myself had kept it inside my study room and now it isn't there. And because of that I had to cancel an important meeting with the Finance Ministry." Hari Kashyap informed his personal manager about the missing file of Goenka.

"But you also said that only you had the access to your study room. So where could it have possibly gone? I mean there in no chance that anyone could have entered your house and taken it along with him. Nothing is making any sense here. It's defying all logic." The manager exclaimed out confusedly.

"That's what is bothering me from the past two days. First of all, not many people knew that I had caught hold of evidence against the Goenkas. And even if they knew about it, how did they manage to sneak into my room. I checked if someone had tampered with my security lock. But it was perfectly intact. And I don't think anyone else had arrived at my house for the past few days. Unless..." Hari stopped midway, a new idea forming in his mind.

"Unless your daughter organised one of her famous parties and that would have given an opportunity for them to get into the house. And Sir, you do know how wasted your daughter gets at these parties. There would have been no way for her to track down every person's activities at the party." The manager completed what had exactly been in Hari's mind.

"Yes, I need to find out if there was some party. But that still doesn't solve how they managed to get hold of the security code. I mean it is next to impossible. I don't remember mentioning it to anyone nor being drugged and forced to reveal it. " Hari lit up his cigar, wondering on the possibilities.

"Sir," the manager exclaimed out loudly as another new idea came to his mind. "Sir, what if we are looking at the wrong angle? What if one of your servants was bribed by whoever wanted that file and maybe he could have sneaked up behind you when you were opening the study room door? It can be possible right."

"Yeah, it's possible too. But if it turns out that one of my servants betrayed me, I swear he won't be living to see the next day. Ask Rohan to summon all the servants in the house and start interrogating them. I need to find that file at any cost." Hari declared banging his fist on the table.

o0o

Khushi reached for the switch board on the left to switch on the lights. The whole of the living room was instantly lit up with brightness. Eerie silence prevailed around her. Why wouldn't it be? There had been no living soul in the house. She could smell the dusty air that had accumulated in the room after not being cleaned for five days now.

Traces of dried flowers remained on the floor, from the garlands that had been brought to adorn the dead body. The furniture that had been moved about to accommodate the dead body and the people visiting it, was still in the same position.

Khushi slowly dragged her feet forward to move back into her home, which no more felt like a home. There was no one to welcome her. No one to talk to. No one who would ask about her welfare. No one who would keep dinner ready for her when she returned home after a tiring day.

"Khushi, do you need anything else?" she heard Lavanya's voice behind her, who had come to drop her home.

"No, I'm fine." Khushi forced herself to smile.

"Ok, then. Goodnight! And call me if you need something." Lavanya called out as she walked out of the compound to her car parked outside.

"Goodnight!" Khushi whispered softly as she closed the door behind her. Turning around, she faced the room once again, observing every tiny insignificant thing about the room.

Sankadevi! What took you so long to return back home?

She heard Buaji's voice echo throughout the room as she slowly dragged her body forward. She felt goosebumps spread all over her arms, hearing the crystal clear voice of the woman, as if she was standing right in front of her.

So what does Sankadevi want for lunch? Aloo Paratha or Bhaingan Bharta?

She felt her chest constrict with emotions as old memories rushed into her.

Take care of yourself in my absence. I know that you are a very good girl but sometimes you get mischievous and trouble me, Sankadevi!

She felt her breath becoming harsher and painful as the final words of their conversation flooded the very room she had last seen her. She didn't know when she had reached Buaji's bedroom and switched on the lights. Now, in front of her, she was greeted with a sight of clothes folded and kept on the bed.

Maybe Buaji had been planning to arrange them in her cupboard before she died.

She could still see the impression of Buaji's body on the bed. The bedsheet still lay crumbled at the bottom. Maybe Buaji had been sick that day. Otherwise, normally Buaji would arrange her bed the first thing when she woke up in the morning.

Khushi moved towards the bed, feeling those creases over the bed with her fingers. She wanted to feel Buaji. But all she felt was void, vacuum, nothingness, emptiness. And then she felt the gates of her dam being lifted up as emotions simply began to flood out of her uncontrollably.

One lone tear escaped from her eyes, as her throat choked with guilt and helplessness. She couldn't handle it. Her knees just gave away and she buckled down onto the floor, as her eyes began to moisten up.

"I'm sorry Buaji. I'm really really sorry!" she choked out unable to bear it anymore, clutching one end of the bedpost tightly.

"I miss you, more than you could imagine." She hung her head unable to bear to see the empty bed in front of her.

o0o

Arnav stopped his bike at the far end of the road that lead to Khushi's house, wondering whether he should drop by to see if she had returned back home. For the past two days, he had stopped by her house every time he had passed by Laxmi Nagar. But with his every visit, he had been greeted by an empty house. But this hadn't hampered his spirit. He had decided he would never give up.

He didn't have any other alternative either. He was apprehensive about calling her over the phone, lest Lavanya pick it up. To his surprise, even Khushi hadn't called him back after that day. For the first day, he had convinced himself that she was probably not in a right frame of mind to talk to him. But as hours passed, this was slowly converting into frustration.

And then, there was the matter of his file left behind at Khushi's house.

All this frustration was driving him insane and this insanity forced him to go and check out her house once again. He didn't keep his hopes high lest he be devastated. As he stopped his bike in front of the compound, to his utter astonishment, he saw the living room being lit up.

And then, he lost all control of his senses. He didn't know when he sprang up from his bike or when he rang the door bell. His mind was completely blank with the excitement of getting to see her after so many days. He waited impatiently for the door to be opened. There was no response from inside. He impatiently rang the bell once again, this time knocking at the door.

"Khushi!" he called out loudly, hoping she would hear. Looks like she did, coz the next minute, the door was opened and there in front of him stood his Angel.

He didn't know what he was doing. It didn't bother him. But suddenly, he felt himself lurching forward and grabbing her body, pulling her tightly into his embrace. The relief that coursed through his body feeling her against him was absolutely indescribable.

Indeed, his mother had listened to his plea once again.

And this time, he simply couldn't control his emotions. He pulled apart from her and grabbing her face with his palms, he began kissing her senselessly all over her face. Gentle, yet urgent like a starved animal that had been left to die out in the woods.

Finally, he captured her lips, letting go of all the frustration pent up inside him. He was too consumed with his own needs to notice that she had remained limp and unresponsive from the time he had launched himself on her. After a whole minute, he realised that she wasn't reciprocating it back. He slowly moved his eyes, boring into hers and for the first time, noticed them moist and reddened.

"Khushi..." he broke away, as he clutched her face and moved away the strands of hair that were sticking on her wet cheeks. He could see the pain and helplessness in her eyes and it broke him to see her like this. There was something more in it. As if they were begging to release them free from all the things that were bundled up inside her.

"Don't worry. I'm here. Right beside you. Trust me. Let it all out." He said resting his forehead on hers as he slowly felt sobs wracking her whole body. And then there was no stopping her.

Khushi could no longer hold it inside her. As his words rang in her mind, she felt safe, comforted and then clutching his shirt, she buried her face into his chest and began crying like never before.

He could feel her going limp as her body weight completely rested atop him. Her upper body was trembling with this sudden rush of emotions. Arnav felt his own eyes going moist seeing her breakdown like this. But he knew, she had to do this. Only this would help her to heal the wounds and scars that were preventing her to move ahead.

"Arnav, I lied to her! I left her all alone at home when I knew that her health was failing. I am a bad person. A very horrible person. Devi Maiyya would never forgive me for this." He could hear her muffled voice in between the sobs. She broke apart to face him, before she continued. "The very last memory I have of her is lying to her. How could I do this? It's all my fault!" she wailed out collapsing down on the floor, beside his legs.

He didn't know how he could help her. "No.. Khushi..." Arnav stammered as he crouched beside her, holding her shoulders. "It's not your fault. You never knew that something unfortunate like this would happen." By now, Arnav was fighting really hard to control his own tears from shedding down his eyes, seeing her like this. "You are not a bad person. Infact, you are the most loving, kind hearted and selfless person in the whole world." He said wiping away her tears with his thumbs.

"Then why Arnav? Why everyone whom I love abandons me? Why? I know you don't have any answer for this. I know why. Because I'm a horrible person who doesn't deserve to be loved. Not by my parents. Not by Buaji. Maybe not even by you." She said trying to push him away from her. But her strength failed her. He didn't even budge an inch from his place.

Arnav didn't know when the anger just shot through his veins, but the next thing he knew, he grabbed her shoulders violently, not bothering if it was hurting her. "Shut up! Just shut up! You are talking nonsense. You hear that! Do you have any idea how does it feel not being loved by anyone? For eighteen years Khushi, eighteen whole years, no one had bothered about me. Whether I was dead or alive! Do you know what it feels like to be all alone in this world? I was like that until you came into my life. Atleast you have been loved. So stop saying that you don't deserve to be loved." He blared at her, shocking her completely at his sudden outburst. She was flinching with the enormous pain stemming through her shoulders due to his painful grip. He instantly noticed this and loosened his fingers.

The regret was instant. He caressed her shoulders trying to ease out the pain he had just caused. This time, he softened his voice as he spoke. "Life isn't fair to anyone. You cannot blame yourself for certain things that are just beyond your control. You have no other choice but to simply accept it and move on."

Khushi was too shocked by his instantaneous change in his behaviour. One minute, he was shouting at her and the next minute, he was comforting her. Arnav was beyond comprehensible at times like these.

But she knew he was absolutely correct, however hard it was for her to accept it.

Not knowing what else to do, she silently snuggled closer to him, settling herself between his folded legs, resting her head on his warm comforting chest. She held him tightly like a kid holding on dearly to her teddy bear. She felt no less than a kid lost among an ocean of strangers.

"I don't know where do I go, how do I begin a new life." She whispered into the crook of his neck, tilting her head upwards to face him. "I feel so lost." She opened up for the first time, letting someone else know what was going on in her mind for the past few days.

He caressed her cheek, feeling heart wrenched to see her in such a helpless state. But he was glad that atleast she had opened up to him.

"Don't worry. I will help you. Just put your trust on me. Infact, from this moment onwards, you are my responsibility. I will take care of you." He reassured her.

"But I don't want to be a burden on anyone. Not even you." She replied sincerely, wanting him to know what she was feeling about everything.

"Yeah, you are pretty heavy considering the fact that you completely leaning your entire body weight on mine." He joked pointing with his eyes at how she was entirely resting her torso on him.

"Oh!" Khushi pulled away feeling embarrassed at being carried away into too much proximity with him.

"Khushi!" he protested, pulling her back to her original position. "I was just pulling your leg. Never consider yourself as a burden to anyone. Especially, not to me. And even if you do, I would whole heartedly want to carry a burden like you in my life." He said entwining his fingers with hers and pulling her hand closer to his mouth, as he placed a soft kiss on the back of her hand.

"Arnav, I don't know what do I do with my life. Whom do I live it for? Till a week ago, I was living for my Buaji. I left my college and began working to run the family. But now, all of a sudden, I have no one. Nothing worth to live for."

"Live for me, Khushi. For us." He said closing his eyes, imagining his whole life ahead with her. But he couldn't put away that nagging feeling at the back of his head that was worrying him for some time now.

Could he really have a future with her? Or was he just giving her false promises and hopes?