(Background- Gunjan, when she entered college first, was extremely shy and scared. Slowly Sam began a friendship with her while having his girlfriend around. Then on a student exchange programme Gunjan had to leave for London for nearly a year. When she is back, she is slightly changed- She is happier, friendlier and very simple and sweet. Her cousins and sister and jiju and Benji greeted her very happily, and her friends also welcomed her. But for Samrat there was a sudden change of feelings. As he gazed at her laughing and hugging everyone, he began to reflect...)
(WRITTEN COMPLETELY IN SAMRAT'S POV)
[[ I am writing it in Hinglish, Hindi and English mix... so plz dont mind...]]
As she entered the college, she looked very angelic. Her million dollar smile, as her sisters Nupur and Dia hugged her, was worth watching. Why am I wishing she was hugging me! Samrat dude, kya ho gaya hai tumhe! Tum koi besharam ladka nahi ho! Yet she struck a chord in my heart. I dont know what it was that caught my fancy.
She was wearing a red-green-white anarkali suit. Her hair dropped off her shoulders, in a messy curly way. Her new rimless specs highlighted her pretty nose in a cute way. Her pretty lips had the beautiful colour of her favourite pink roses. Her skin looked so flawless and smooth... Uff Samrat, kya soch rahe ho!
Oh no, she caught my gaze. Quick, dude, look away! O dear, she is coming my way. She stood in front of me, and I stood there, gazing and gaping at her beautifulo eyes and eyebrows. She said hello and I managed to croak away a hello.
Benji my friend, who knew so well how I missed her, once again and unwittingly, came to my rescue. He led her away to a special welcome gettogether we had planned for her. Once again I was left to my thoughts. Evereyone walked on, and Mayank stood beside me, asking kya hua dude? Tum aa rahe ho, na?
I nodded and told him I would join. Suddenly Aparajita came up to me. She was now my ex girlfriend. She looked askance at Gunjan going away and looked at me. So she is back? I told her to lay her hands off my Chashmish, and walked away from her.
I entered the room where the little welcome party was held. I looked at Gunjan, and everything around me blurred. She was looking gorgeous. Nupur and Uday had put on the cake mixture all over her beautiful face. Tasty... Uff, dude stop it!
I looked away, my eyes closed, trying to get those nagging thoughts away fro my mind. Main sharif hoon. Woh meri dost hain, bas, aur kuch nahi!
I looked up and gazed at her again. She went to a washroom in the other side of the room, and came out again, her face wet, water dripping from her hair strands. I felt rooted to the spot, stupefied. She looked as if she was a bright, fair, lovely angel who lights up my heart and face whenever she looked at me. She was smiling, and I remembered our friendship days.
How she loved watching me play basketball and encouraged me to improve my grades. How I helped her regain confidence and positivity after her traumatic past, much before she came to Excel. How we were poles apart yet had similar likes and dislikes. How we went for long walks with my dog, thos moonlit beach nights. How she shone in the moonlight. How I loved taking pictures of her.
She looked so innocent and simple, as she talked with her family and friends. Nupur was by-god-ing away, Mayank was nok-jhoking away with her, Dia and Benji were sharing an interesting joke together. Uday was eating and eating and eating. Gunjan was talking with her classmates.
I looked at her. There seemed to be a huge number of butterflies in my stomache. I looked at her- Her face, her charming and sweet smile, her lips, her eyes, the way her hair was tucked behind her ears, her little bangs and curls, her beautiful arms and super soft hands, her fingers entwined with her dupatta. Her specs which were not distracting. Her soft laugh. Her figure, height and stamina.
I gazed on her, a deep longing in my heart. A huge block of stone seemed to be inserted into me.
I looked at her with strange feelings. Chhee Samrat! tum itni besharam ho! Yeh lust bandh karo! What will she think of you!
I looked away. Reluctant. Unable to think. Kya karun. Kiske saath baat karun. Sab busy hain.
I turned around and slipped away, not wanting my feelings burst out and get written all over my face.
I walked down the corridors to the basketball court. My team wasw practising, and they asked me to join in and teach them a new trick. To take my mind off, i went to play. I bounced and bounced and gave a shot, one after the other. My mind was buzzing. My heart seemed to leap. My energy was boundless. I could not concentrate but I wanted to get rid of my confusion. Perspiration came. My Tshirt got drenched in my sweat and I looked like a shinning shooting star.
My team mates dared not to dribble the ball away from me. They sensed I was in a very disturbed mood. I was furious at myself for no reason. I felt irritatible. I felt empty and numb.
I stopped at last, panting and wheezing. One of my mates threw a water bottle and I caught it and drank the cold water. Splashing it on my head and face, I turned around to see her gazing at me. Her expression was odd. Her eyes looked very different.
A sudden thought crossed my mind- Does she feel for me? Has she missed me? What are her thoughts for me?
Chhee Samrat! Why will she think like you! She takes me as a friend! Of course she must have missed me!
I forced a smile and walked up to her. She looked suddenly shyly at me, then away, blushing pink. I asked her Kya hua?
She smiled and then looked at me. Nothing, Samrat...
I loved her voice. As she smiled at me, I found myself gaping and getting lost again. Quickly control yourself, Samrat! I smiled. She took something from her colourful jhula bag, and took my wet hand. I felt emotions, warmth, feelings, confusion rushing to my head like a flood, at her single touch. She kept a box in my hand. For you Samrat!
I smiled gratefully and opened it. Gajar ka Halwa!
She nodded, smiling simply and innocently. I felt my heart pumping and beating fast and rapidly. I felt faint as I again gazed into her eyes. Somehow she was also gazing into my eyes, her expression lost and seemingly different. We gazed at each other for how long I dont know. But I was loving it. She didnt say anything too. I looked at her, and a deep slab of stone in my stomache seemed to attempt to get out of my throat, out of my mouth.
I felt music in my ears. I felt only her presence. It seemed only her face was visible and nothing else. I never felt like this for any girl before. I suddenly felt the urge to take her in my arms, to hug her, to make her mine, to pamper her and make her smile, to kiss her, to protect her.
Suddenly a finger clicked in between us, and Chashmish and I broke our gaze. She blushed and looked away. I felt embarrassed and saw Nupur, Dia and others, standing there and observing us, with suspicious looks. They quizically looked at us, at each other and then again at us.
Chashmish and I just smiled. I felt her smile to be a half hearted one- as if she was not happy to be disturbed.
Kabab mein haddi, I thought to myself. Mayank and Benji looked at me deeply and then at each other- they seemed to have guessed something. Nupur and Dia decided to go home and take Gunjan with them unless I dropped her. I jumped at the offer, teasingly telling her that my car and my bike missed her a lot. Gunjan blushed and asked Aur tum? She suddenly stopped, as if controlling herself. I looked at her and then out blurted I missed you Chashmish. I missed you every day, every moment. I missed dropping you off. I missed you look at me playing basketball. I missed our night walks. I missed you.
She looked at me. We were suddenly oblivious to our surroundings. She said I missed you too Samrat. I missed you so much that it hurt me.
I suddenly felt brave and bold, as if a spirit within me was lifting me up. But I tried to hold back my temptation.
Her eyes became teary and she looked away, blinking back some tears.
I looked at her, trying to understand her. I suddenly found that this time I could not read her mind, could not understand her expression. The others stared at us,
Then Mayank, my friday man Mayank, said- Dude, why not take a lambi walk on the beach. It is nice and cool and it might even rain! He winked at me. Nupur's expression was even more funny and mischeivous. Her eyes twinkling, she suggested that Gunjan and I can go for a beach walk and then have a dinner date out. Dia also got into the mood- Arre guys why not lets all go! Benji, Dodo and I would love to check out a new plaza and shopping centre there. Nupur, tum aur Mayank can join us for your Honeymoon shopping! Kyon Gunjan?
Gunjan looked flustered and blushed even more.
I smiled and laughed. Okay guys lets go!
After so many days she sat on my bike. She was so light and looked so frail and vulnerable as she sat behind me. I was suddenly resolved to handle my bike with care. She seemingly hesitatingly kept her hands on my shoulders. I felt another flush of warmth and butterflies in my stomache and more music in my ears. But I was in control of myself. Dia and others got into Dia's car. They were to follow us. I gave them a thumbs up sign. Nupur called out Sambhaalke jaana Samrat! I nodded and smiled. Then I zoomed off. Chashmish was silent and from my rearview mirror I often glanced at her expression. She was looking my head. No she was looking at me. Why? Did she feel something for me? What?
Again I was forced to brush away my thoughts and tried to concentrate on the road. She suddenly seemed to be even more precious to me. As we waited at the signal, she smiled at my small quips. Then her soft voice told me that she was very happy to see me again. Again I became flustered. Again I forced myself. Yet I felt my ego and boldness increasing. I was losing my focus and all my reasoning. Gosh! What is happening to me!
Somehow I managed to reach the beach, with her safe and sound, her helmet on her head intact. I smiled at her and locked my bike. The others joined us, and then left us to go their way. They all winked at me while Gunjan was not looking, and I realsed they were guessing my mood. Did they feel it's alright? So I am not wrong? Is it... I shook my head, and looked at Gunjan. Chashmish smiled and asked me in her sweet voice. Shall we start walking to the icecream corner? How is Bozo? Bozo was my dog. I smiled and relpied that Bozo was rocking.
Then as Chahsmish walked on, I stayed back a bit and looked up. Dude. Help me!
We walked. We were silent, trying to think of something to say. I asked her about her stay in London. She told me about her stay, some new friends, her life there. I asked her if she enjoyed. She replied that she missed her family, her friends, her town, her college. She didnt mention me though. Suddenly I felt a bit disappointed, as if all the airbubbles in me have got burst like balloons.
Then she dropped the bombshell. She missed my company the most. She always thought of me, my philosophy and outlook. She always remembered me, whenever some random guy would try to befriend her.
I looked at her. I felt exactly the same about her. As if I could not bear to be away from her. As if I treaure her company the most. As if I want her. As if I might lose her again if something happened to her. As if someone might take her away from me.
I looked at her deeply as we walked. She was lost in her thoughts as well. She often glanced at me, and this time I didnt look away. Neither did she. We stopped. Around us not a soul was seen. Only sands behind us and the sea in front of us. We faced each other and gazed on each other, uninterrupted.
Then I felt a voice within me. It told me to say something. Yet I held myself back. What if she thought I was being cheap. I feared rejection by my best friend. I tried to gauge her own expression which seemed troubled, full of mixed emotions. Her eyes had that longing look. Her lips were quivering. It was as if she wanted to say something but could not bring herself to it.
Go for it Sam!
Go for it Sam!
Sam!
Samrat!
Lots of voices in my head, specially those of Mayank, Bneji and Uday flushed through my head. Nupur's By god Samrat, tum bhi naa!!
I looked around. No one was visible. I realied these were voices. Dia's voice now came. Come on Sammy! You are in love! I am so happy for you!
Love? Love? Matlab mujhe pyaar ho gaya? I suddenly got surpised at myself. Chashmish was gazing at me, oblivious to her surroundings. Did she feel the same for me? Did she fear rejection from me?
No my dear sweet Chashmish... I looked at her more keenly. Then I asked her if she was okay. She nodded and looked away a bit, as if suddenly self conscious. Samrat...
Haan Chashmish...
Samrat... Chalo... Icecream... She became hot and flustered suddenly and slowly turned towards the sea waves. The waves drencehed our feet. The evening sun was still up. The breeze was blowing her hair off from her face and shoulders. Her anarkali suit and jhula bag were flowing in the wind. She closed her eyes, taking in the sea smell. I gazed at her.
It started drizzling. She looked happy suddenly. She laughed and whirled around slowly, her arms wide apart.
Chashmish... I croaked.
She stopped and looked at me.
Mujhe tumse kuch kehna hain.
She turned fully towards me, suddenly looking worried and nervous.
I looked at her. She seemed to get scared. Samrat?...
Emboldened, I knelt down on one knee. She stepped a bit backwards, suddenly a sea of emotions on her face. She turned away from me slightly, her chest heaving, her eyes fearful and frightened. As if she could not believe herself. As if she was afraid she was dreaming. Her hand nervously clasped around her jhula bag. Her face and hair got wet in the drizzle, and she shivered in the breeze.
Samrat... Please...
I decided to go on. I began and told her about my feelings that got developed during her absence. She glanced at me and then looked at the sand behind me. I then told her how I missed her. I told her sbout my feelings. I told her how I felt so empty withput her, how she always completed me. She looked surprised, as if not believing. She shut her eyes and then opened them, pinching herself and then realised that I was talking to her.
Then I said the magic words. I love you Chashmish. I felt my words echoing. All the pebbles and butterflies got out from my stomache. Do you love me Chashmish? Main tumse pyar karti hoon. Kya tum mere zindagi ki hilsa banogi?
She stepped backwards and looked flustered. Tears sprung out from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. Lips quivering even more, she was breathing hard. I slowly got up and stepped foward, took her hand. I clasped it with both my hands and I asked her if she would be mine.
She bit her lip a bit and then she muttered something I could not comprehend.
Kya Chashmish? Maine nahi suna...
She suddenly threw her arms around me. I was taken aback.
Then I wrapped my arms aroun her. She was so slim that my arms met. I nestled my face on her shoulder, into her hair. I shut my eyes, taking in her perfume. Her seemingly tiny frame clung to me, her one arm around my neck, her hand in my hair, and her other arm was around my back. She hid her face into my shoulder.
After what seemed like eternity, we broke apart, and she spoke out loudly. I love you too Samrat. Main bhi tumse pyaar karta hoon!
I felt as if I have entered the heaven. The evening sun turned golden, everything around us seemed to be in gold and blue and green. The waves rumbled and roared. The drizzle became fat raindrops.
We hugged once more. I looked up once, thanking the dude above in my mind.
My mind and heart were now in peace. Chashmish is now mine. I love her. she loves me.
We are in love at last.
THE END
Edited by suhaanishergill - 13 years ago