Dear Arnav,

My Darling Arnav,

I know its an unforgivable mistake to have abandoned you for so long considering how much I love you. After the fiasco that was the episode when you saw the love of your life practically on the verge of ruining your beloved sister's marriage, I couldn't go on. I lost all hope. I couldn't even switch on the TV, I was scared stiff of seeing your tortured eyes again, the earlier fervor and passion I had for the show got lost somewhere in your tears.

But make no mistake, darling. It didn't keep me from keeping myself updated on your life and Khushi's antics in it, thanks to You Tube.

Dear heart, how my heart was broken. I saw the promo of you coming face to face with your Khushi in his arms, and I freaked. I couldn't even watch the episode. I switched to another channel when I saw your face, but I still tortured myself and tried watching it again, but those tears in your eyes, the utter despair in them, the bleak desolation slowly turning to unbridled hatred when you couldn't understand your aching heart, all made me ignore the pain in MY heart leading me to only watch snippets of the show from time to time after that. The subsequent events did uplift my spirits somewhat, but I was still apprehensive.

And I still am.

And then, last night happened.

I wasn't even planning to watch the show, mind you. I didn't expect you to get your due with all the Saas Bahus running the show, and we all know, Arnav Singh Raizada won't tolerate a Saas Bahu Saga.

But then I accidentally switched on STAR Plus while trying for SONY TV, and I saw the image of you laugh while watching Khushi dance on stage. *heart stops*

Boy! I was transfixed. And at that precise moment, I realized how much I've missed you. Oh, how I've missed you, dear Arnav.

I absolutely adored you, Barun Sobti. A.K.A Arnav Singh Raizada. You floored me beyond words. I couldn't describe how I felt when you smiled, laughed, and the awkward way you tried to host your segment of the show. I adore the fact that you don't look comfortable among strangers, that you don't behave like the rest of the Star Plus men, that you didn't lose your weird sense of humor, nor the way you look at the largely superficial crowd. Oh, how supremely attractive you were, darling Barun.

My absolute thrill when you won the award for the Favorite New Comer (My Hubs now fears for my sanity. Granted, its not the first time, but I do believe last night I gave him a fright he may never recover from), and the shrieks that followed when you came down and hugged Khushi so lovingly, and most importantly, when you quietly walked away while talking on the phone at the end of the show, when everyone was getting ready for the maha end! How you stand out among the crowd, Barun. Gosh. Its sooo sexy!!

I believe I shall forever be in love with you. I shall forever be lost in your eyes which really, honestly, do twinkle!!! How in the world to do you do that?

Anyways, here is wishing you love, success and many, MANY more awards.

Take Care.

❤️