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Karisma Kapoor: Survivor & a winner
There's no one quite like her in the film industry today. She's a fourth generation Kapoor to be in films and one of the first women in her family to take to acting - she broke the unsaid rule of no Kapoor girl working under the arclights. From a gauche, awkward teen who was lambasted for her style or the lack of it, thick eyebrows, clothes and poor acting, Karisma fought back with sheer grit to become a top star with several hits to her credit.
A powerful actor, she's an enduring style icon at 36. Her personal life has played out in full public glare - from her break-up with Abhishek Bachchan in a haze of ugly rumours, to her volatile marriage to industrialist Sanjay Kapur, plagued by rumours of infidelity and abuse. She has taken it all in her stride with rare emotional maturity. Today she's a happy mother of two and a proud home manager. Calm but still wanting to do more, she's coming back to films with Vikram Bhatt's Dangerous Ishq.
When I meet Karisma, I'm struck by how engaging she is in real life. She smiles directly at you and gives you all her attention. The actor looks surprisingly different from her onscreen persona. All set for her comeback, Karisma says, 'I am fortunate that I've had great roles in my career - women-oriented title roles, mainstream... However, I haven't done a role like this before. Dangerous Ishq deals with past-life regression. It's a murder thriller and is going to be made in 3D. It spans different eras in mythology.'
The journey so far
Karisma has come a long way since Prem Qaidi, her first movie, released in 1991. She has to her credit big hits such as Raja Hindustani ('96), Dil To Pagal Hai ('97), Biwi No 1 ('99) and Dulhan Hum Le Jayenge (2000). Fiza (2000), Zubeidaa ('01) and Shakti: The Power ('02) weren't commercial successes but her performances stood out in these films. 'I think my journey has been phenomenal,' says Karisma. 'I've grown up in this industry. My first movie released after my 16th birthday - I was out of school, and moved to the sets. That was my birthday gift - my movie's release! It's been a journey where every step has gone up the ladder, and I've been fortunate that I have had such great roles.'
She left Bollywood at the peak of her career. Was it a difficult decision? 'It was easy. I had worked so hard in my life for everything, from such a young age that I knew it was time for me to settle down, have children, a family. I didn't want to be too old when I came around to doing that. It was a decision I fell easily into.' Karisma says that before
she actually started "taking it easy", she didn't know that she was a homebody, someone who can be happy without wanting to prove something. 'I was so tired of working. I welcomed the idea of just doing nothing, really. Like a sabbatical. I was still working after marriage, but after the baby, she became my life. I was very happy, in fact. It wasn't difficult like it can be. For some celebrities to accept, "Oh my god! I am not the same person!" and to feel satisfied is difficult. But I'm happy just being home with my children. Nothing is more important to me.'
Being A Mother
Karisma's first-born, Samaira (6), followed her mother to the sets of Mehboob Studios, where we were shooting, after her school got over, her nanny in tow. You have to see the mother-daughter duo to understand how much they dote on each other. After every dress change, Karisma would turn to Samaira to know if she was looking good, and the little one would murmur her approval, or tell her that she didn't like the shoes.
'Being a mom is the best thing in the world. It's like a miracle! I used to be a child myself. And then all of a sudden, I was responsible for these two lives! I remember how my mother used to sit up for us at night, waiting, asking, "When are you coming back home?" All of that feels justified now. Even more so because I am a paranoid mom - I want to do the right thing...' she enthuses. Karisma is reluctant when it comes to her children being caught in the limelight. 'I want them to cherish their childhood - Samaira came to the shoot today straight from school,' explains Karisma. Samaira has just started catching on to the fact that her mother used to be one of the most sought-after women in the industry just a short while back.
'I have to explain things. Like, she'll ask me, "Why are people looking at you? Why are they asking for your autograph?" In the beginning, she used to be very possessive, so I had to pacify her, "Mummy used to be an actress, they like your momma, that's why people ask for her autograph." She has gotten used to it, but it's important to save them from the limelight.' Is this the reason why she hasn't worked all these years? 'These are their formative years, and I want to enjoy them. I won't be proud of the fact that I am out all the time, working.
My son is an year old now; he has company in his elder sister- everything is structured. So, I am comfortable working.' Has she been able to work the directors around the fact that since she is a mother, she has additional commitments towards her family? 'People have become so "correctly" broad-minded - they understand that I'm a mom, and I have a home to run, so they are willing to adjust and keep my priorities in mind, just as it's in Hollywood,' she smiles. During holidays, she plans to take children with her to the location, but during school, the dates need to be worked around them.
A day in her life
Whoever thought that homemakers have it easy sitting at home, think again! 'On a school day, I am up with my child. I'm the kind of mother who has to be up when my daughter is going to school. I see to it that she's getting ready,' says the mother. 'Then there's gym, my son, home. It's so many things just being a stay-at-home mother. There's so much that goes into it - you have to keep your home clean, update what the new cleaning products are. It's a new life!' Karisma, surprisingly, is a hands-on home manager. 'I watch over the grocery shopping at my place to see what's new in the market, what item I'm getting free with the thing I buy. I am very clued in. My baniya guy (grocer) is my buddy!
My cook comes and tells me about "free" offers, and I'll tell him that "Abhi bhejo usko, last month nahi bheja tha." I believe in woman power. Being an actor, a mother, a homemaker, a daughter, wife, sister, or a friend, I need to give everything my best. Hats off to everyone who is a homemaker - it takes a lot to maintain a good home, bring up the children, keep everyone happy. Home is where happiness is, including your staff. They shouldn't be grumpy!'
Does Karisma cook for her children? 'Though I'm not a good cook,' she laughs, 'for them I learnt a few dishes and picked up a few recipes from my mother. I'd call her and ask her, "How do I make a really good vegetable soup? Or what are the healthy snacks?" I note it down in a diary or pick up the recipes from magazines, then teach my cook. I can, touchwood, manage a healthy meal plan for my kids.' All of this from a person who is a self-claimed bad eater. 'I am a very bad eater - people don't believe that. I love eating things such as pizzas, biryanis and also burgers' I do not let my kids eat that (laughs), it's a once-a-week treat for them.'
Making things work
A lot of newsprint has been devoted to Karisma and the downs of her personal life. Earlier it was her career and how success came with the price of overloaded expectations, initial bad movie choices, and later, her much spoken about relationship with Abhishek Bachchan, and recently, her whispered on-the-rocks wedlock to industrialist Sanjay Kapur. How does she deal with times when things aren't going right, and when all people seem to want is a juicy piece of gossip?
'As a celebrity, you tend to get used to it. You feel hurt but you can't get away from it. You just have to blank it out of your mind. How long can you fight it? It's part of the game - good, bad, fantastic things will be said about you if you're in Bollywood,' says Karisma. Has she ever felt that if it weren't for her celeb status, her relationships would've been different?
'Bad things happen to everybody. You have to look at the good in every situation, because negativity tends to weigh you down.'
This brings us to the next question, how much does one give to a relationship before calling quits on it - for example, on marriage? 'You have to work on every relationship. The same is with marriage. Husband, boyfriend or director... It's very important to respect a relationship. Throughout my career, giving my all has been important. If things have to happen, they will happen. If they don't, they don't. I have no regrets, if I've given it my all. This is the belief that me and Kareena have been brought up on.'
Honesty
Karisma, just like her sister Kareena, who has been open about all her relationships, has also lived her life in the public light. The sisters broke the unsaid Bollywood code of "never owning up", never wanting the dirt to be kicked up - 'Honestly, I'm a very private person. All these years in the industry, I never had people hanging around me at the sets.
I am a loner and like to be on my own. But whatever I've done in my life, I've always been open about it, because you need to be proud of what you are doing and there shouldn't be any regrets, so you should be honest.' A trait that she learnt from Babita, her mother? 'Definitely! She is a strong person - what I feel good about now is that I am imbibing these strong values in my children as well.
Strong work ethic, the importance of hard work, appreciating what you have in life - these were some things that our mother drilled into us when we were growing up. These values carried me through a long career at a very young age, which was quite impressionable, and today I want to offer my children that legacy.'
The Kapoor Woman
"Kapoor women" haven't, traditionally, been encouraged to go out and work - particularly in the entertainment industry. Karisma and Kareena (Bebo) were able to do that because their mother saw their back through it all. This has only strengthened their relationship. Karisma says: 'They are both my best friends. Bebo is my soulmate. We talk about anything and everything. We are six years apart, but people don't realise that, because we are very close.
Today, I take Kareena's advice. What makeup should I use, which stylist should I go by... It's a role reversal - now she's become the mother hen. I live in a different house in Mumbai, but we keep meeting each other. It's not about me anymore but about my children. She'll be like, "Are Kiaan and Samaira home? Why is Samaira busy? I am free for two hours, can you call her back?"'
Now that Karisma has started working in the movies again, being around her mother really helps. 'I couldn't do without my mother in bringing up my children. When I travel, I give her 150 instructions about Kiaan and Samaira, and she says, "Do you know I've brought up the two of you?" And I am like, "All that is fine but please see that this happens at this time, and that happens at that time." She quietly grins and bears the instructions given because I am the mom now and she is the grand mom.'
Teen to a Style icon
If you're a celebrity, people don't let you forget your mistakes. Or bad choices. It's with this thought that I ask Karisma to comment on the little girl she used to be when she first started out in movies, dressed in the most unreal clothes, her hair tied teasingly in ponytails, playing the gooey-eyed love interest, to her later avatar as the mature, glamorous actor.
She laughs, 'It was just growing up. From a young girl to a woman. You get into your own personality. Even though I'm not acting right now, people still appreciate the way I dress and look. I've also learnt to say no. Those days (when she started out) were more difficult for heroines because there were no stylists, or makeup and clothes tests - there is so much offered today even to newcomers. In those days, whatever the producer, director said, we wore. Even if it was a silly frock, or roses in our hair.' How does she maintain herself now? (Karisma is slim, and has a fabulous body, as you'll notice on the cover.) 'It's a mix of diet and exercise - I think my biggest quality in life has been that I'm a very disciplined person.
I love to eat good food... I put on 24kg during Samaira's birth! It took me 5-6 months to lose it, but I did it the correct way. No crash diet or going crazy at the gym. If you starve, then you are going to put on weight from whatever you eat. I love to take walks. And I think forty five minutes is good enough!'
Looking and feeling gorgeous, happy and elated, Karisma is back, and here to stay!
There's no one quite like her in the film industry today. She's a fourth generation Kapoor to be in films and one of the first women in her family to take to acting - she broke the unsaid rule of no Kapoor girl working under the arclights. From a gauche, awkward teen who was lambasted for her style or the lack of it, thick eyebrows, clothes and poor acting, Karisma fought back with sheer grit to become a top star with several hits to her credit.
A powerful actor, she's an enduring style icon at 36. Her personal life has played out in full public glare - from her break-up with Abhishek Bachchan in a haze of ugly rumours, to her volatile marriage to industrialist Sanjay Kapur, plagued by rumours of infidelity and abuse. She has taken it all in her stride with rare emotional maturity. Today she's a happy mother of two and a proud home manager. Calm but still wanting to do more, she's coming back to films with Vikram Bhatt's Dangerous Ishq.
When I meet Karisma, I'm struck by how engaging she is in real life. She smiles directly at you and gives you all her attention. The actor looks surprisingly different from her onscreen persona. All set for her comeback, Karisma says, 'I am fortunate that I've had great roles in my career - women-oriented title roles, mainstream... However, I haven't done a role like this before. Dangerous Ishq deals with past-life regression. It's a murder thriller and is going to be made in 3D. It spans different eras in mythology.'
The journey so far
Karisma has come a long way since Prem Qaidi, her first movie, released in 1991. She has to her credit big hits such as Raja Hindustani ('96), Dil To Pagal Hai ('97), Biwi No 1 ('99) and Dulhan Hum Le Jayenge (2000). Fiza (2000), Zubeidaa ('01) and Shakti: The Power ('02) weren't commercial successes but her performances stood out in these films. 'I think my journey has been phenomenal,' says Karisma. 'I've grown up in this industry. My first movie released after my 16th birthday - I was out of school, and moved to the sets. That was my birthday gift - my movie's release! It's been a journey where every step has gone up the ladder, and I've been fortunate that I have had such great roles.'
She left Bollywood at the peak of her career. Was it a difficult decision? 'It was easy. I had worked so hard in my life for everything, from such a young age that I knew it was time for me to settle down, have children, a family. I didn't want to be too old when I came around to doing that. It was a decision I fell easily into.' Karisma says that before
she actually started "taking it easy", she didn't know that she was a homebody, someone who can be happy without wanting to prove something. 'I was so tired of working. I welcomed the idea of just doing nothing, really. Like a sabbatical. I was still working after marriage, but after the baby, she became my life. I was very happy, in fact. It wasn't difficult like it can be. For some celebrities to accept, "Oh my god! I am not the same person!" and to feel satisfied is difficult. But I'm happy just being home with my children. Nothing is more important to me.'
Being A Mother
Karisma's first-born, Samaira (6), followed her mother to the sets of Mehboob Studios, where we were shooting, after her school got over, her nanny in tow. You have to see the mother-daughter duo to understand how much they dote on each other. After every dress change, Karisma would turn to Samaira to know if she was looking good, and the little one would murmur her approval, or tell her that she didn't like the shoes.
'Being a mom is the best thing in the world. It's like a miracle! I used to be a child myself. And then all of a sudden, I was responsible for these two lives! I remember how my mother used to sit up for us at night, waiting, asking, "When are you coming back home?" All of that feels justified now. Even more so because I am a paranoid mom - I want to do the right thing...' she enthuses. Karisma is reluctant when it comes to her children being caught in the limelight. 'I want them to cherish their childhood - Samaira came to the shoot today straight from school,' explains Karisma. Samaira has just started catching on to the fact that her mother used to be one of the most sought-after women in the industry just a short while back.
'I have to explain things. Like, she'll ask me, "Why are people looking at you? Why are they asking for your autograph?" In the beginning, she used to be very possessive, so I had to pacify her, "Mummy used to be an actress, they like your momma, that's why people ask for her autograph." She has gotten used to it, but it's important to save them from the limelight.' Is this the reason why she hasn't worked all these years? 'These are their formative years, and I want to enjoy them. I won't be proud of the fact that I am out all the time, working.
My son is an year old now; he has company in his elder sister- everything is structured. So, I am comfortable working.' Has she been able to work the directors around the fact that since she is a mother, she has additional commitments towards her family? 'People have become so "correctly" broad-minded - they understand that I'm a mom, and I have a home to run, so they are willing to adjust and keep my priorities in mind, just as it's in Hollywood,' she smiles. During holidays, she plans to take children with her to the location, but during school, the dates need to be worked around them.
A day in her life
Whoever thought that homemakers have it easy sitting at home, think again! 'On a school day, I am up with my child. I'm the kind of mother who has to be up when my daughter is going to school. I see to it that she's getting ready,' says the mother. 'Then there's gym, my son, home. It's so many things just being a stay-at-home mother. There's so much that goes into it - you have to keep your home clean, update what the new cleaning products are. It's a new life!' Karisma, surprisingly, is a hands-on home manager. 'I watch over the grocery shopping at my place to see what's new in the market, what item I'm getting free with the thing I buy. I am very clued in. My baniya guy (grocer) is my buddy!
My cook comes and tells me about "free" offers, and I'll tell him that "Abhi bhejo usko, last month nahi bheja tha." I believe in woman power. Being an actor, a mother, a homemaker, a daughter, wife, sister, or a friend, I need to give everything my best. Hats off to everyone who is a homemaker - it takes a lot to maintain a good home, bring up the children, keep everyone happy. Home is where happiness is, including your staff. They shouldn't be grumpy!'
Does Karisma cook for her children? 'Though I'm not a good cook,' she laughs, 'for them I learnt a few dishes and picked up a few recipes from my mother. I'd call her and ask her, "How do I make a really good vegetable soup? Or what are the healthy snacks?" I note it down in a diary or pick up the recipes from magazines, then teach my cook. I can, touchwood, manage a healthy meal plan for my kids.' All of this from a person who is a self-claimed bad eater. 'I am a very bad eater - people don't believe that. I love eating things such as pizzas, biryanis and also burgers' I do not let my kids eat that (laughs), it's a once-a-week treat for them.'
Making things work
A lot of newsprint has been devoted to Karisma and the downs of her personal life. Earlier it was her career and how success came with the price of overloaded expectations, initial bad movie choices, and later, her much spoken about relationship with Abhishek Bachchan, and recently, her whispered on-the-rocks wedlock to industrialist Sanjay Kapur. How does she deal with times when things aren't going right, and when all people seem to want is a juicy piece of gossip?
'As a celebrity, you tend to get used to it. You feel hurt but you can't get away from it. You just have to blank it out of your mind. How long can you fight it? It's part of the game - good, bad, fantastic things will be said about you if you're in Bollywood,' says Karisma. Has she ever felt that if it weren't for her celeb status, her relationships would've been different?
'Bad things happen to everybody. You have to look at the good in every situation, because negativity tends to weigh you down.'
This brings us to the next question, how much does one give to a relationship before calling quits on it - for example, on marriage? 'You have to work on every relationship. The same is with marriage. Husband, boyfriend or director... It's very important to respect a relationship. Throughout my career, giving my all has been important. If things have to happen, they will happen. If they don't, they don't. I have no regrets, if I've given it my all. This is the belief that me and Kareena have been brought up on.'
Honesty
Karisma, just like her sister Kareena, who has been open about all her relationships, has also lived her life in the public light. The sisters broke the unsaid Bollywood code of "never owning up", never wanting the dirt to be kicked up - 'Honestly, I'm a very private person. All these years in the industry, I never had people hanging around me at the sets.
I am a loner and like to be on my own. But whatever I've done in my life, I've always been open about it, because you need to be proud of what you are doing and there shouldn't be any regrets, so you should be honest.' A trait that she learnt from Babita, her mother? 'Definitely! She is a strong person - what I feel good about now is that I am imbibing these strong values in my children as well.
Strong work ethic, the importance of hard work, appreciating what you have in life - these were some things that our mother drilled into us when we were growing up. These values carried me through a long career at a very young age, which was quite impressionable, and today I want to offer my children that legacy.'
The Kapoor Woman
"Kapoor women" haven't, traditionally, been encouraged to go out and work - particularly in the entertainment industry. Karisma and Kareena (Bebo) were able to do that because their mother saw their back through it all. This has only strengthened their relationship. Karisma says: 'They are both my best friends. Bebo is my soulmate. We talk about anything and everything. We are six years apart, but people don't realise that, because we are very close.
Today, I take Kareena's advice. What makeup should I use, which stylist should I go by... It's a role reversal - now she's become the mother hen. I live in a different house in Mumbai, but we keep meeting each other. It's not about me anymore but about my children. She'll be like, "Are Kiaan and Samaira home? Why is Samaira busy? I am free for two hours, can you call her back?"'
Now that Karisma has started working in the movies again, being around her mother really helps. 'I couldn't do without my mother in bringing up my children. When I travel, I give her 150 instructions about Kiaan and Samaira, and she says, "Do you know I've brought up the two of you?" And I am like, "All that is fine but please see that this happens at this time, and that happens at that time." She quietly grins and bears the instructions given because I am the mom now and she is the grand mom.'
Teen to a Style icon
If you're a celebrity, people don't let you forget your mistakes. Or bad choices. It's with this thought that I ask Karisma to comment on the little girl she used to be when she first started out in movies, dressed in the most unreal clothes, her hair tied teasingly in ponytails, playing the gooey-eyed love interest, to her later avatar as the mature, glamorous actor.
She laughs, 'It was just growing up. From a young girl to a woman. You get into your own personality. Even though I'm not acting right now, people still appreciate the way I dress and look. I've also learnt to say no. Those days (when she started out) were more difficult for heroines because there were no stylists, or makeup and clothes tests - there is so much offered today even to newcomers. In those days, whatever the producer, director said, we wore. Even if it was a silly frock, or roses in our hair.' How does she maintain herself now? (Karisma is slim, and has a fabulous body, as you'll notice on the cover.) 'It's a mix of diet and exercise - I think my biggest quality in life has been that I'm a very disciplined person.
I love to eat good food... I put on 24kg during Samaira's birth! It took me 5-6 months to lose it, but I did it the correct way. No crash diet or going crazy at the gym. If you starve, then you are going to put on weight from whatever you eat. I love to take walks. And I think forty five minutes is good enough!'
Looking and feeling gorgeous, happy and elated, Karisma is back, and here to stay!
Ishaani
Cricket
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