As luck would have it , I was late.
Why was it, that when you have an 8 o'clock appointment on the busiest street in the whole city, on a Monday morning with the biggest client that could exist, that would also be the day, that the alarm clock broke, the hot water stopped working and the neighbor's dog decided that the newspaper was meant to be displayed across the front lawn. Added to that was the fact that I had to return a call to some really really, really distant cousin from Nowhereville, who called this morning at the ungodly hour of, well lets just say it was early!
Just my luck. Grabbing my jacket I was almost out the door, when the telephone bellowed to be answered. Yes it bellowed, phones don't ring when you're late. They know you're late so they bellow. Loudly!
Going against my better judgment I decided to answer the telephone. Can't be late twice can you? At least that was what my mother used to say. I think my lateness is a hereditary problem, must make a note to look into that. But I stray. The bellowing phone, turned out to be the really really distant relation mentioned in my rambling monologue earlier, giving me the news that I had inherited a baby, yes you read right, a baby from a second cousin twice removed and replaced or something to that effect, who had left me the sole guardian of her child, should the unspeakable happened.
Well the unspeakable did happen. I'm sorry that I may seem a little bit cavalier about this but you have to hear me out. Or read me out as the case may be. You see, this cousin of mine, who mind you I have spoken to in the last three years at least five times, left me the gift of her precious six month old daughter, in the event that her closest other relation was unable or unwilling to take the child in the event of her untimely death. You see, my cousin was a single mother with no immediate family except me and my third cousin by marriage, Earl. She was a waitress in a sleazy bar where she met with a gentleman, who left her the next morning with a missing $100 and a bun in the oven. She met with her demise when she apparently, drunkenly attempted to cross the freeway at two in the morning, while wearing a pair of red heels and a bikini. Don't ask, you don't want to know. Apparently Earl was first in line for the kid according to the will that my cousin had amazingly had the foresight t create, and seeing as he was a thirty three year old drunk living in the basement of his friend's house with no obvious means or inclination to care for an infant, the child falls on me.
Now I'm not father material, believe you me. I'm a 25 year old advertising account executive, who likes to party and have fun. I was not, I repeat was not father material. But what am I to do, when they tell me, that I was this baby's last hope. That this baby's happiness and future depended on me. Now when you hear that you have to feel sorry for the baby. Which is why, instead of heading uptown to meet my really big client, I was now heading downtown to the lawyer's office. Some days you wonder why you get out of bed!
Part Two
I'm sorry, I don't think I properly introduced myself before. My name is Jason Wells. As I said before I am a twenty five year old accounting executive for one of the biggest advertising agencies in New York City. My hobbies include sports in any form or fashion, with the exception of golf, and drinking. Heavily. If bar hopping and clubbing was an Olympic sport, I'd be a gold medalist. I like having a good time and hey, once I wasn't hurting anyone I was entitled.
Which is why, the notion of me having a kid to care for, was utterly foolish and absurd! Which is what, I plan to tell this quack of an attorney once I get to his office. What type of name was C.J. Green for a lawyer, anyway? The plan is to speak to the attorney and find a reasonable way out of this. I can't raise a kid. I simply can't! It defies all laws of logic and nature to entrust a child to me and once this second rate attorney met me, he would know that too. I would simply make the necessary arrangements once I was at the intellectually lacking attorney's office, to have the child transferred into foster care.
Its only 10.30, so maybe after a run to this attorney to sort the matter out, I might still be able to reschedule the cancelled breakfast meeting for later today, and my entire day may not be a complete loss. Things are looking up.
Now my next problem is to find the office. The address of the office seemed to be in the upside of town, but Liza ' my benefactor- couldn't have possibly been able to afford a big-shot attorney so maybe I got the address wrong. Okay, I am now parked outside the address I was given, and there is not a one room attorney's office with tacky windows and worn out signs in the vicinity. Ironically enough, I happened to park in front of WGG Attorneys at law offices, one of the largest and most influential; law firms in the city, while I look for this C.J. Green. Then it hit me. Like a bat to the head. This is the law firm.
Well maybe this isn't going to be as bad as it seemed. Walking into the building of this firm is, was an experience all on its own, but I'm not going to bore you with the architectural wonder of the offices. After politely asking the quirky and unnaturally chirpy receptionist for C.J Green, I was escorted up to the 5th floor and was now waiting in an expensively furnished lobby area. Then a woman, in a brown pin stripped suit, with jet balck hair and exotic looking eyes approached me. Well at least this C.J. Green has enough taste to hire a beautiful assistant.
"Hi, I'm C.J. Green, and you must me Jason Wells, nice to meet you." She said as sweetly as possible as she held out her hand for me to shake.
This can't be CJ Green.
"You're not C.J. Green?! You're not a man?! I mean you're kinda young aren't you? Are you an attorney?" As the words were coming out of my mouth I was trying to reel them back in, only more words just kept spilling out, until I realized that not even a hole dug all the way to China could be large enough to swallow me.
"That came out wrong, I mean, are you Liza Jenkins attorney?" I tried to save face and hurriedly blurted out the question before the lovely creation in front of me could have responded to my first outburst. Maybe she didn't notice I said anything before.
With a stern expression on her face, she replied, "Yes I am CJ Green, no I'm not a man, as far as I now, never was, I am young but not can't legally drink yet young, and yes I am attorney. A junior associate here at WGG and yes I am Liza Jenkins' attorney, well sort of anyway."
So much for her not having heard my earlier questions, and with the dagger like looks that she seemed to be throwing my way, I'm suddenly very afraid to open my mouth again. Why was I here again?
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
