I wanted to act because I wanted limelight: Rajeev
Rajeev Masand / CNN-IBNMumbai: On To Catch A Star, CNN-IBN gets you actors, filmmakers, and technicians who stood out from the crowd and dazzled us with their early work.
Here's an actor who left television to make his debut in an unconventional film, which he held together by the strength of his performance alone. Rajeev Khandelwal's debut in Aamir earned him the appreciation of the critics and the Bollywood fraternity.
Rajeev Masand: So much is made of your large female fan following. This huge fan base who embraced you so heartily on television, one would have expected that they would have come and watched your debut film Aamir. However, judging by the box office performance, it is clear that they didn't. Could it be that they are happy to embrace you and to watch you for free when you are on television but would not pay the price of a ticket to come and watch you on a film?
Rajeev Khandelwal: I would say, Aamir was a film made for a different kind of an audience. I really don't believe that if you have a huge fan following, they would come and watch any film of yours. Aamir picked up after a couple of days. I remember, that as long as Aamir was there in the theatres, we never had a screening wherein it went empty.
By the time the film got off the theatres, it was running packed houses, which happened after a week's time. It was a very strong word of mouth.
Unfortunately, the film did not come across as a huge success because it was not released in as many theatres as you would see other films getting released.
The film got its due. Not too many women came and watched the film, but still, when I went in to watch the film, I saw many women, 80-year-olds and others, who were watching and enjoying the film. To be very honest, we weren't expecting that. When I started with Aamir, I was not expecting a huge hit. It was not meant to be a huge hit. It was a film that had to make its presence felt and that is what it did.
When I do a commercial film where there aren't any heroines, there aren't any songs, why would any one pay 250 bucks to see Rajeev Khandelwal whom you are used to watching free of cost.
Rajeev Masand: You wanted to make a debut in an unconventional film. Was it unconventional for the sake of unconventional or was it because you couldn't relate to the conventional filmy kind of a launch?
Rajeev Khandelwal: For me it was very important that my first film makes a mark. It didn't matter whether I made a mark or not, but the film has to make a mark for me to get noticed. When I read the script of Aamir, I did not think it was a conventional film. I found the film very commercial.
Of course, it did not have the basic elements of a commercial film. It did not have songs; it did not have a heroine. It was centered on a guy. What does a commercial film do? It keeps you engaged. When one comes out after seeing a film, he should say, "Wow! That was a good movie!' That is what a commercial film means to me.
Rajeev Masand: Why did you want to be an actor. Did you feel it was a skill you possessed or was it a story of a small town boy with stars in his eyes?
Rajeev Khandelwal: If I look back, I wanted to be an actor only because I wanted limelight. To start off with, when I was in class three, it was all about being in the limelight. It went on till my school days. I was still in the limelight without putting too much effort. I was very pathetic on stage.
I was mostly very sad when I did shows on stage or plays or mimicries. I used to do a lot of things. But I used to enjoy the limelight. The whole idea of being seen and heard was something that fascinated me. For me, getting into acting was like a dream that I cherished ever since I was in class three, gave up that dream when I reached college and then once again, after my college, I realised that I should put in some effort and see whether I can succeed or not.
Rajeev Masand: Did you ever feel like an outsider in the film industry based on the fact that you were coming from television?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Yes, initially before Aamir, I did feel like an outsider. The kind of films that were being offered to me were not really very exciting or not from big production houses.
There weren't too many people noticing me despite the fact that you are very popular and you tell yourself, listen I come with this huge popularity, so why don't you think of casting me. You are thinking of casting people who come with that lineage.
In fact, even for Aamir, I remember Anurag and everyone had to go from one producer to the other. Most of them thought of casting a newcomer or someone else saying this guy is from television. He is very popular. Lets think of someone else.
Rajeev Masand: Even a newcomer with absolutely no experience was a preferred choice than someone from television?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Yes, few producers actually thought of casting newcomers. But thankfully, Anurag stood by his conviction and that is how I got the film. That was one stage when I really felt like an outsider and I thought that it's all about my performance or how I would carry this film on my shoulders. Let us not get into the fact that I am from television.
This was like a mental block that some producers were having. Post Aamir, the kind of warmth that I got from the people of the industry was overwhelming. Who would expect Paresh Rawal to walk up to you and congratulate you on your success, or for that matter, Ram Gopal Varma messaging you saying that he loved the film, though his film was released along with my film? I would say they have given me my due.
Rajeev Masand: Let's talk a little bit about your television career. When you considered to become an actor, did you consciously pursue television over film or is it that those were the offers that first came to you?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Beggars can't be choosers. Films were not happening for me. I was against doing television at that time because the only things in fad were the daily soaps, which were Saas-Bahu soaps. I got into it because I had to start from somewhere.
I did a few commercials here and there, which got me some quick money. I was at the crossroad of my life thinking what do I do. I am a very restless guy. I hate wasting my time doing nothing or just waiting for things. I am not very patient and I am not the kind of guy who would say that this is my focal point and I would wait for it to come.
Television happened and I said before I get into films, lets find out how good an actor I am. I do not have a formal training in acting. I do not come with any background. So, for me it was more about discovering myself as an actor before I walked up to a producer and say please cast me. You have to feel confident about yourself before you say I am an actor.
You have to feel like an actor. For me it was a testing ground. My first show was a romantic role as a romantic lover boy of this country. Then came the question, am I capable of doing only a romantic role. All that I did on television was to discover my own acting range.
So that when I walk up to Anurag Kasyaph and say thank you for casting me, I should feel good about saying that. I want to feel deserving all the time. I hate when I get things without me deserving them. It is not that I had films on my mind all the time. Probably if television had excited me or kept my excitement alive, I would have continued doing television.
Rajeev Masand: You really broke out with your role as Sujal in the Balaji soap Kahin Toh Hoga. It was a character, which was very internal kind of character, very introvert but character with a lot of attitude, who did not really share his emotions but when he did, he could be almost considered as grim. Why did you take this role?
Rajeev Khandelwal: I was told it was a great show. I did not have the skill or understanding or intelligence to understand which role suited me. I was too naive as an actor then. I was told it was a great show.
Ekta was looking for someone for a very long time and they were going to put in a lot of energy into the show. That was primarily the reason for me to get into the show. When I took the audition and screen test for Sujal, I somehow felt the reliability factor with this character. I was asked to play both the principal characters of the show, Sujal and Piyush.
But when I auditioned for Sujal, it just came to me a little more naturally. There are times when you are given a choice to pick up one character out of three; you would pick up something that appeals to you the most. That was the case with Sujal. I connected with Sujal's character.
Rajeev Masand: What was the fallout with Ekta Kapoor? The impression was that you got too big for yours boots. What went wrong?
Rajeev Khandelwal: The impression was created by others, not by me. I wonder why. It is so sad that when you walk out of a show saying no to a show that has made you popular, and you have not signed any other offers, people think that you have become larger than your boots, but nobody understands that it is a huge risk that you take.
You walk out of a show because you feel that you are done with the show. You feel like you are not delivering in the show. You feel as though you are sleepwalking through the character. Yet you walk out on the streets, and you wave and give flying kisses to your female fans, how do you feel truthful about yourself? For me, it was all about my conscience. I felt like I cannot sit on this throne without delivering. So, if walking out of a show and not doing a 24-episode story means that I have become larger than my boots, then I am extremely sorry.
You fail to understand, it is not easy to say no to bucks. The second show that I did was about one-fourth of what I was charging for Kahin Toh Hoga. You cannot stop people from building perceptions. For me, it was all about growth and feeling deserving. It was all about experimenting. When I go ahead in my life and look back, I should feel good for whatever I did.
Rajeev Masand: When you were replaced in Kahin Toh Hoga, were you curious to see how the other actors faired. Were you sort of hoping, I hope this fails so that they realised that you were really good at this?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Yes being a human being you hope that such things don't work because you are very emotionally attached to that character. But I was so emotionally attached with my character that I refused to see any episode. I just waited for peoples' reactions. I waited to see whether they missed Sujal or not.
Rajeev Masand: So Aamir came at the right time for you when you were getting restless and tired with television?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Yes, it came at the right time. I did not know what to do with my career. I was just contemplating as to which side should I take. Should I now actually go and knock on the doors of the producers and begin my struggle or should I continue looking for something better on television from which I would end up making a new ground on television.
Aamir was god sent for me. I was made many offers by producers post Kahin Toh Hoga, but it was all about exploiting my popularity, and not making a good film. It was all about putting me in to get some more viewers to the cinema hall. Nobody was being honest to the film. Then came a script, which took me completely by surprise. I read the script and it was such an honestly written script that I knew this was going to be my debut film.
Rajeev Masand:Where do you go from here? You proved the fact that you can act. What are the kind of films that you are drawn to?
Rajeev Khandelwal: From here on, I want to prove that I can always act. It was not a fluke. It wasn't a beginner's luck. From here on, I need to prove that I can be consistent. From here on, I need to prove that I can sustain myself. I need to prove that nothing gets into my head.
My choices are still as sane and simple and as sensible as Aamir was. For me, from here on, it is all about discovering myself. The struggle actually begins now. Aamir came without any expectations. Now the expectations have gone up. I am trying to keep myself away from those expectations and not trying to get pressurised into it. I still want to follow my heart. My second film is called Peter Gaya Kaam Se. I have just signed that one film. It is all about following my instincts. Failures and success will come and that is what it makes me human.
Rajeev Masand: What are your all time favourite films? The films you grew up watching.
Rajeev Khandelwal: From Bollywood, Sholay is an all time favourite film. Everyone in the country can watch Sholay even hundred more times. It has the most correct screenplay.
Everything was correct in the film. From casting to screenplay to music to editing to sound effect, everything is perfect in the film. I like Amitabh Bachchan's films, all of his films, till I think Toofan happened, Jaadugar happened. Just like any other Indian, I have grown up watching his films. I was a huge fan of Rajesh Khanna as well. People think I resemble him. In fact, someone introduced me to him saying, "This is the new age Rajesh Khanna."
Rajeev Masand: How did he react?
Rajeev Khandelwal: I don't know, but he said, "Do you know what is the difference between you and me? - You are a better actor then I." It was very humble of him though. I told him even if I get one-tenth of your talent and your popularity, I would have felt blessed in this life.
I have seen Rajesh Khanna's films and Dev Anand's films. All time favourite films would be Sholay, Shakti, Deewar. If you come to 90s, Shah Rukh's Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge, few of Salman's films, Aamir Khan's films. Those have been my favourites.
Rajeev Masand: We make so much of a deal saying Aamir being an unconventional film, eventually it was a rip off of Cavite, wasn't it?
Rajeev Khandelwal: I don't know. People were talking about it being inspired by Cavite. I had been kept away from the whole thing initially when it came up. I remember my director, Raj Kumar telling me that his script got registered much before Cavite got released.
Accordingly, I believed him. I still believe him. I still believe my producers because I have not seen Cavite till now. I did not see Cavite. I did not want to be inspired or get disappointed by doing a film, which was inspired by Cavite.
But till date, my director maintains the fact that this film is not a rip off of Cavite, it just that, there are lot of similarities between the two films. But then, keeping that in mind my producers did a right thing by approaching the makers of Cavite, and that is why when you see Aamir, the first 'thank you note' that goes is to the makers of Cavite.
Because he had approached them and told them that our script has a very uncanny resemblance to your film and would they mind if we made this film. They had given their no-objection letter. I think it was fair. Even if it inspired, we gave them their due.
Rajeev Masand: A lot of people in the industry ask that you can act but can you be a Hindi movie star? Can he do the whole Hindi film star routine like singing and dancing, and running the trees? My question is a little different, do you want to do that?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Thank you for asking me that question. My answer to that would be, I am not here to work for someone else. I am here for my own career. I am here for my own sake. As long as I can survive on my own decisions, the stuff that I want to do, I would be more than happy. I am not here to prove a point to anyone.
I come with my own flavour of Rajeev Khandelwal. I do things that I feel good about. If I am accepted, that is good enough. If not, then I would probably try and do the things that will help me survive. I am not here to be a typical Bollywood hero. If I become one, I would be more than happy. All through this journey, I would want to follow my instincts and do things that I believe in.
Rajeev Masand: It is a very competitive industry, have you seen some of your competition? Have you seen your rivals?
Rajeev Khandelwal: Harman, Imran and Ranbir. I have seen Ranbir's Bachna Ae Haseeno. I think Ranbir has got a great screen presence. He has got everything that is required to be a commercial hero. He looked very pleasant on screen.
Women find him really hot. It is good to have people like Ranbir and Imran, kids love him and everyone is raving about their performance. Harman is very promising. It is great to have competitors like them. What would have been the fun if I were the only one who would have been the face of this year?
It makes your journey exciting. The way I look at it is, like the way Dev Saab, Rajesh Khanna and Amitabh Bachchan started their career together, it was all about travelling 20 years together and then reaching here and to say, we all started together, we are all from the same era.
I would love to be with these guys after 20 years. We would do a lot of films together, may not do films together. You may not know about the future, but it is great to have such interesting newcomers. They will always be my batch mates.
Rajeev Masand: Thank you Rajeev for joining us today and best of luck. We are hoping we can always expect something unconventional, something different from you. We will be looking forward to see what you do next.
Hey,I think this Interview was just awesome.....I wish i cud have seen it on tv when it came......But anyone who wants to see the video can find it on www.ibnlive.com i suppose...!!
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