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Pranx presents : The Indian Telly Curry (making curries was never so simple!)
The trick to getting this curry right is to make it really long-lasting (2 yrs min). This is a unique curry because the garnishing is more important than the basic curry which by
itself contains so many flavours that after a while, everything tastes the same. The dish remains the same, its only the garnish that changes and presto! you get a brand new
dish! The curry should be completely covered by by it so that the customers get so hooked to it that they will eat anything that it there under it, even if it seems like rubber.
Spices can be added for added flavour.
The 5 essential ingredients are:
1. The protagonist.
HAS TO BE OF THE FEMALE SPECIES. Any type will do. Must have a very high IQ and still manage to do the dumbest of the things. In the market they are available in
various types -- tall, short, thin, fat, dark, fair, ugly, beautiful, rich, poor, clever, arrogant, docile...the list is endless. Absolutely any type would do because after the curry would
still taste the same, no difference.
2. The family.
Used as a binding agent that holds the curry together. It must be steeped in traditional values, unaccoustomed to the realities of city life. Most popular types are
Punjabi, Gujarathi, though newer variations like Rajasthani can be tried out. Ideally should consist of a strict but loving father, a gentle and kind mother and a naughty sibling.
Granny or Granpa is a must. They must be young at heart and always support the heroine against her parents.
3. The best friend.
Can be either male or female. Highly unpredictable taste. In its raw form its pure white, but on cooking may turn gray or black. Can be used as reqd. If you feel the curry
is turning bland, add more of this to spice it up because it offers interesting twists. Usually, a guy has a +ve effect while a girl has a -ve effect. Some ways of using this ingredient
to make the curry tasty: the guy can develop a crush on the heroine and will fight with the entire world for her only to see her running back to her lover. However this type can
lead to complications with the lover as their flavours can clash. The girl, on the other hand can fall in love with the heroine's lover and thus turn into a guy-snatching vamp who
would stab her friend in the back.
4. The lover.
Must be a handsome man with low IQ. They oscillate between -ve and +ve, but in the end turn +ve due to the effect of the protagonist. Must be a spoilt brat of obscenely
rich parents. Essentially a person who's good at heart but has got a few grey shades due to faulty upbringing. Must be a Mama's boy. Reacts immediately with the protagonist on
adding to the curry. You can have the simplest love at first sight; the more difficult hate at first sight, love at second sight; or the twisting and turning awe at first sight,
hero-worship at second sight, crush at third sight, disillusionment at fourth sight, hate at fifth sight.... and live at the last sight(phew!)
5. The Vamp.
Very spicy and too haot to handle. More spicier, better is the curry taste. Can be easily distinguished by the ultra western outfits, hideous makeup, noodle strap
blouses and designer bindis. They have a jet black core which seeps out when cooked in the curry. Blackens everything tht comes in contact with it.Sole purpose-- ro marry the
hero and make life hell for our heroine. An interesting variation is to make the hero's mom as the vamp, in which case the aim would be to kill the heroine and grab property
handed to the son by his dead father.
A few imp ones:
God.
Must be present in the protagonists family. Can be in a small photo-frame or in a mini-temple in the house. Must provide hopein times of despair and magically solve
problems.
House.
The house must be a bunglow- irrespective of whether the family is high, middle or low class.
Clothes.
Desiner clothes or pure Kanjeevaram sarees only with matching accesories.
Spices in the form of extended family members, friends, colleagues or nosy neighbours can be added for comic relief.
Procedure:
Mix all the ingredients, add water and boil till everything gets discoloured and looks the same. Garnish liberally using themes like fashion house, media house, business house,
radio station, call centre so that the curry remains hidden. Serve hot. By the time you are halfway through the dish, it will have turned ice cold.
The trick to getting this curry right is to make it really long-lasting (2 yrs min). This is a unique curry because the garnishing is more important than the basic curry which by
itself contains so many flavours that after a while, everything tastes the same. The dish remains the same, its only the garnish that changes and presto! you get a brand new
dish! The curry should be completely covered by by it so that the customers get so hooked to it that they will eat anything that it there under it, even if it seems like rubber.
Spices can be added for added flavour.
The 5 essential ingredients are:
1. The protagonist.
HAS TO BE OF THE FEMALE SPECIES. Any type will do. Must have a very high IQ and still manage to do the dumbest of the things. In the market they are available in
various types -- tall, short, thin, fat, dark, fair, ugly, beautiful, rich, poor, clever, arrogant, docile...the list is endless. Absolutely any type would do because after the curry would
still taste the same, no difference.
2. The family.
Used as a binding agent that holds the curry together. It must be steeped in traditional values, unaccoustomed to the realities of city life. Most popular types are
Punjabi, Gujarathi, though newer variations like Rajasthani can be tried out. Ideally should consist of a strict but loving father, a gentle and kind mother and a naughty sibling.
Granny or Granpa is a must. They must be young at heart and always support the heroine against her parents.
3. The best friend.
Can be either male or female. Highly unpredictable taste. In its raw form its pure white, but on cooking may turn gray or black. Can be used as reqd. If you feel the curry
is turning bland, add more of this to spice it up because it offers interesting twists. Usually, a guy has a +ve effect while a girl has a -ve effect. Some ways of using this ingredient
to make the curry tasty: the guy can develop a crush on the heroine and will fight with the entire world for her only to see her running back to her lover. However this type can
lead to complications with the lover as their flavours can clash. The girl, on the other hand can fall in love with the heroine's lover and thus turn into a guy-snatching vamp who
would stab her friend in the back.
4. The lover.
Must be a handsome man with low IQ. They oscillate between -ve and +ve, but in the end turn +ve due to the effect of the protagonist. Must be a spoilt brat of obscenely
rich parents. Essentially a person who's good at heart but has got a few grey shades due to faulty upbringing. Must be a Mama's boy. Reacts immediately with the protagonist on
adding to the curry. You can have the simplest love at first sight; the more difficult hate at first sight, love at second sight; or the twisting and turning awe at first sight,
hero-worship at second sight, crush at third sight, disillusionment at fourth sight, hate at fifth sight.... and live at the last sight(phew!)
5. The Vamp.
Very spicy and too haot to handle. More spicier, better is the curry taste. Can be easily distinguished by the ultra western outfits, hideous makeup, noodle strap
blouses and designer bindis. They have a jet black core which seeps out when cooked in the curry. Blackens everything tht comes in contact with it.Sole purpose-- ro marry the
hero and make life hell for our heroine. An interesting variation is to make the hero's mom as the vamp, in which case the aim would be to kill the heroine and grab property
handed to the son by his dead father.
A few imp ones:
God.
Must be present in the protagonists family. Can be in a small photo-frame or in a mini-temple in the house. Must provide hopein times of despair and magically solve
problems.
House.
The house must be a bunglow- irrespective of whether the family is high, middle or low class.
Clothes.
Desiner clothes or pure Kanjeevaram sarees only with matching accesories.
Spices in the form of extended family members, friends, colleagues or nosy neighbours can be added for comic relief.
Procedure:
Mix all the ingredients, add water and boil till everything gets discoloured and looks the same. Garnish liberally using themes like fashion house, media house, business house,
radio station, call centre so that the curry remains hidden. Serve hot. By the time you are halfway through the dish, it will have turned ice cold.
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