papaG & yuvi: adult child-parent conflict; am my own person - Page 5

Originally posted by: Ritzzee23

how can parents make their children feel valued? how can parents note their appreciation for the boring, responsible ways the child stands by them?

if you are an adult child who feels they are not acknowledged, how do you deal with it? how do you communicate those feelings to your parents? do you think it can change to a more healthier dynamic?

I can talk about my own example for this question of yours mango... As an adult living with parents it's a difficult situation with lots of complexities...For parents we are not adult, we are still the child we were way back and that sometimes lead to friction...sometimes we also want appreciation from them but feels like whatever we do to please them or do in general is never enough... We never feel valued. And it stuck to us like maybe the problem is us.. We are not doing enough.. That guilt is always there.. Living together we have to interact a lot and so the friction keeps on increasing.

So even when we communicate those feelings , they don't try to understand.. They think we are degrading them.The age gap factor here plays a big part...

We today's kid are so open to every type of opinions so our perceptions are wider.. But our parent's generation are not exposed to soo much information... So the difference of opinion is always there... Nobody wants to listen to anyone, nobody wanna communicate.. The friction keeps on increasing with time... Its not healthy for any party but one can do so much to keep relationships from going bitter...

Especially with mothers... The mother tries to teach girls their way of living life which they have learnt from their mothers, but today's girls don't want to lead that life which of course has a more patriarchal undertone attached.. They have their own opinions which they don't fear to express which afraid the mother the most like how my girl will adjust in future in another house.... So yes adult children and parents relationship are way complicated in today's time with difference of opinion and life choices...

Ritzzs, ❤️ u dear.🤗

Not bad yaar, tumne bhi finally essay likh dala.😃 and how nicely u hv explained everything. 👏

I can totally relate to this coz i hv a similar kind of story. But to maintain peace at home,i hv accepted my situation. 😆There is no point to argue with them or counterattack them. They will never understand you.

I so agree with this line.

So yes adult children and parents relationship are way complicated in today's time with difference of opinion and life choices...

Mango, there is a lot of scope for exploring the conflicts between MamaR and Viaan. As of now, it does not appear to us as conflict, because Viaan never reacted to MamaR and her Viraaj jaap. Last episode, Katha became the trigger to open up those pent up conflicts. Thats another Parent-Child conflict

I think Mango has a new topic to write on

Originally posted by: Lethamukund

Mango, there is a lot of scope for exploring the conflicts between MamaR and Viaan. As of now, it does not appear to us as conflict, because Viaan never reacted to MamaR and her Viraaj jaap. Last episode, Katha became the trigger to open up those pent up conflicts. Thats another Parent-Child conflict

I think Mango has a new topic to write on

kekeke.... we will be dissecting nightie mama and viaan for sure with each episode. not sure if I will have energy to create a separate thread though. at this rate, I will be become conflict professori! 🤣

that said, I have complete different reactions to papaG vs nightie mama. with the conflict with his sons and the fallout, I feel a bit sorry for the family. maybe it is because his problems are very relatable, normal and something that happens in real life. you want those families to patch up but the issues have been going on for so long that they are fighting over the randomest silliest things.

whereas with nightie mama, I am annoyed. I dislike this character. she feels toxic and psycho. as I said in DT, I won't be surprised to see her turn crime patrol type crazy.

Originally posted by: mango.falooda

kekeke.... we will be dissecting nightie mama and viaan for sure with each episode. not sure if I will have energy to create a separate thread though. at this rate, I will be become conflict professori! 🤣

that said, I have complete different reactions to papaG vs nightie mama. with the conflict with his sons and the fallout, I feel a bit sorry for the family. maybe it is because his problems are very relatable, normal and something that happens in real life. you want those families to patch up but the issues have been going on for so long that they are fighting over the randomest silliest things.

whereas with nightie mama, I am annoyed. I dislike this character. she feels toxic and psycho. as I said in DT, I won't be surprised to see her turn crime patrol type crazy.

PapaG is relatable and even when we dislike him for his actions, we like him for his love for MamaG.

I would say we can see many MamaR in real world also. Who lives in denial of the cheating by their husband and try to find their partner in their own sons, in the process they get so possessive that they forget that they have to allow their sons to have their own life

I dislike MamaR after last 2 episodes. I have put her officially in Ehsan league

Originally posted by: Lethamukund

PapaG is relatable and even when we dislike him for his actions, we like him for his love for MamaG.

I would say we can see many MamaR in real world also. Who lives in denial of the cheating by their husband and try to find their partner in their own sons, in the process they get so possessive that they forget that they have to allow their sons to have their own life

I dislike MamaR after last 2 episodes. I have put her officially in Ehsan league

with papaG, it is more of a communication, conflict management and parenting style issue. so there is a kind of hope that if these issues are sorted in away that both children and parents can find a middle ground on, they can turn a new chapter. it still feels like a healthy love despite the fights.

you are right that there are nightie mamas who are over possessive of their sons in real life. but I am not sure I can see happy ending with those type of people and relationships. basically either the son is attached to the hip for life and takes all the beatings along with his wife and children or he moves away and has fractured relationship. there is no middle ground here because the love and relationship is so toxic.

Originally posted by: Lethamukund

Mango, there is a lot of scope for exploring the conflicts between MamaR and Viaan. As of now, it does not appear to us as conflict, because Viaan never reacted to MamaR and her Viraaj jaap. Last episode, Katha became the trigger to open up those pent up conflicts. Thats another Parent-Child conflict

I think Mango has a new topic to write on

She made such a deep topic last time that I am still ruminating upon it😲

well that was a nice chat and encapsulated the conflict well. so why is yuvi spiraling out? because he is deeply unhappy and feeling isolated. there are many ways to distract oneself from your sorrows and depending on the person, it may look harmless. for some, it may be shopping addiction or binge eating or watching tons of serials/movies or talking on the phone to friends for hours or playing mobile games... for some, they take to alcohol -- not to have fun but to try to forget their hurt.

as katha noted, yuvi is feeling alone and hurt. mamaG also is aware that reet does not understand yuvi at all and his feelings. she also feels papaG is not wrong because yuvi is not doing well no matter how matter how hard papaG tries. but as katha notes, adi is already gone, how can yuvi be found? papaG cannot find adi in yuvi no matter how he looks. as she notes poignantly, yuvi is also waiting to meet his father but he can only do that if papaG looks for his son.

if papaG has to look for his son, he has to see yuvi for the person that he is. mamaG said yuvi has always been quietly responsible but it looks like they never communicated that they actually appreciate what yuvi has done. instead, they are all looking for what yuvi cannot do -- be adi. so it is great to see this chat happen between the two ladies and have mamaG open her eyes

mamaG knew there was a problem but she didn't know what exactly it was and how to possibly go about solving it. sometimes, what is obvious to others isn't obvious to us. we need the perspective of others to tell us what is wrong.

Thanks for tagging me.🤗

Mango, i must say the way you understand the Garewals, noone understands them.😆

Jokes apart ,again u hv explained the complex relationship between PapaG and Yuvraj nicely. He should not search for Aadi in Yuvraj. He should see Yuvraj as yuvraj ,his other son.

Originally posted by: Nabni_blr31

Thanks for tagging me.🤗

Mango, i must say the way you understand the Garewals, noone understands them.😆

Jokes apart ,again u hv explained the complex relationship between PapaG and Yuvraj nicely. He should not search for Aadi in Yuvraj. He should see Yuvraj as yuvraj ,his other son.

kekekek... even I am amused at myself and how much I enjoy these side characters and have so much to write about them. 😂 there were lots of good stuff in the episode that I enjoyed -- they sound so simple but I found them sweet.

appreciated that papaG asked aarav to leave the room first before he launched on yuvi. that was a nice touch that the adults don't want to show their ugly selves in front of a kid. good idea especially when he is 8 and just getting to know them.

drunk yuvi is actually happy to see aarav -- again that is rather sweet. he may be unhappy and hurting because no one seems to appreciate him but he loves his family and that includes 'little one' aarav.

but I was surprised by katha you know -- thought she will be like typical ITV heroine who gives long nonsensical lectures. instead, she was quick, cut to the point and was actually astute. she made sense!!!! 👏 I really appreciate that she wasn't sticking her nose into it just because she was FL. she even managed to appreciate and acknowledge mamaG as the peace binder who managed to bridge their long separation.

so I am looking forward to the comedy of her trying to befriend reet just so that she can lecture about yuvi. reet and katha have nothing in common. so this is going to be amusing. 😆

Originally posted by: mango.falooda

kekekek... even I am amused at myself and how much I enjoy these side characters and have so much to write about them. 😂 there were lots of good stuff in the episode that I enjoyed -- they sound so simple but I found them sweet.

appreciated that papaG asked aarav to leave the room first before he launched on yuvi. that was a nice touch that the adults don't want to show their ugly selves in front of a kid. good idea especially when he is 8 and just getting to know them.

drunk yuvi is actually happy to see aarav -- again that is rather sweet. he may be unhappy and hurting because no one seems to appreciate him but he loves his family and that includes 'little one' aarav.

but I was surprised by katha you know -- thought she will be like typical ITV heroine who gives long nonsensical lectures. instead, she was quick, cut to the point and was actually astute. she made sense!!!! 👏 I really appreciate that she wasn't sticking her nose into it just because she was FL. she even managed to appreciate and acknowledge mamaG as the peace binder who managed to bridge their long separation.

so I am looking forward to the comedy of her trying to befriend reet just so that she can lecture about yuvi. reet and katha have nothing in common. so this is going to be amusing. 😆

What i like about our show is except nighty mama most of the women characters are sorted and they are happy in their own space. Reet's problem is different. But Katha,Dodo,MamaR,Guni Maa,Jenny,Farah,Nevedita are all happy go lucky types.

Sadly all the male characters are totally messed up. 😆