Standing at a distance from the bench where Anu sat in solitude, he watched her smile and play with the kids in the park...the innocence in their smiles and hers was no different yet the contrast was stark.
He felt a lump in his throat as he helplessly stood there admiring her strength to endure the unparalleled pain she bore within...he fervently wished to wrap his arms around her in a comforting embrace, to take all her pain away, to help her breathe...but he let her be.
She needed this time alone, to make sense of her life, her past and future, also the present which was the most terrifying... and no matter how ardent his intent, he had to leave her to pick up the pieces on her own...cause this wasnāt about him...
He could stand there all day...he could wait for as long as she needed and if she ever needed a shoulder to cry on. She was broken but still was a lot stronger than he could ever be.
Giving her the space and time, he carried on watching her without blinking as though consoling her with his eyes...when one of the kids threw a ball that nudged him breaking his gaze and she saw him there.
Mortified, he walked towards her with the ball and gave it to the kids to play. His presence made her uneasy almost like she was caught red handed...she tried to look away to hide her devastated expressions but he was quick to read them and the unrest in her body language made him think he was invading her privacy.
He knew she would bounce back soon and that she didn't need him to stay but what if she did this time? he thought anxiously...it would only make it more awkward for the both of them if he stayed he thought again as he stood there confused, not noticing how close she was to a breakdown...
Battling with the conflict in his head he decided to leave without saying a word... though it didn't seem right to leave her alone in that condition he chided himself and hesitantly uttered a bye when she burst out crying...
He cautiously sat down on the other end of the bench and let her cry her heart out... bawling she tried to say something and he just nodded to agree, knowing exactly what she wanted to say...He cried with her, her tears soaked her dupatta while his drenched his heart.
He would have never asked her to leave her family if he knew it would bring her such unbearable pain...he wanted the best for her but not at the expense of losing loved ones, the family and home she considered her own. He mentally cursed himself for saying all that he did at the bhumi pujan and blamed himself for the intolerable heartache he put her through.
āAnuā he gasped nervously looking at her glum, tear-stained face when the hiccups started to fade...it tore him apart to see the suffering on her face...āmain thik hoonā she said wiping the dry tears that burned her eyes... āAnuā he called her name again, this time to assure her that things be good again...āhaan jaanti hoon Anujā she said looking at him with hope and gratitude...
There was a lot they talked about and yet the silence was unbroken...
Sitting on the bench, side by side they spoke their hearts to confront the high tide.. a painful end to a happy beginning, they had each other to take life in stride...
ok so it started off with it being just about her but he just got involved somehow...MaAn are inseparable I tell youš...I do have something in mind after this, as in what happens after the bench scene...might post tomorrow if time permits cause I save all my chores for Sundayš
ye wala kuch thik thak laga toh batana please, bohot serious toh nahi hua na? coming from me I meanāŗļøš¤£ jo bhi ho batana zaroor pileej
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
Anupamaa
Dr Aarambhi
