Would you want Virat as a partner? - Page 12

Originally posted by: sairat07

Feed this in ur mind behno....

Bandi kabhi bhi palat sakti hai as said by Rachel🤣🤣🤣

Originally posted by: rac1

Wah kya confidence hai is it because she is watching b?

Thanks for your reply Lakshmi. I agree to this statement of yours

He doesn’t even think that the way he proposed Sai was wrong. He should be thinking that too. He has zero self introspection. A person has to if they want to fix things in their life.

Yeah in a way, I also feel the same by saying that he doesnt realize at all that he is putting Pakhi above Sai. He is oblivious to the fact that Sai is getting effected. Only introspection and observation can help him, and Sai.

Originally posted by: laksh

What do I say Sadhika. You know my views already and so does Pooja. I still feel the same. He has to give Sai the position that any wife would want or deserves and keep Pakhi at a position as that of a brother’s wife. While writing this reply I have got the best way to put it out. Virat should first move on more than Pakhi if he wants Sai to understand him and to have a peaceful life with Sai. Somewhere it looks like he is still holding on to his first impression about her and hasn’t let himself change his impression about her based on all her actions in the past 1 year.

Coming out of guilt is also important. I read an article yesterday. Will share a very important piece from it.

Check the below. Has Virat done these? Haven’t I always been unhappy that Virat hasn’t apologised to Pakhi the way he should have for the decision that he took and for what he asked Pakhi to do. Did he apologise for the waada?

How to forgive yourself when you’ve done something wrong:

Forgiving yourself after offending someone or doing them wrong takes self-reflection and commitment to make changes.

1. Accept and admit to yourself what you did wrong.
2. Acknowledge that you regret your decision and wish you had acted differently.
3. Consider why you made the mistake. Were you tired, jealous, desperate, angry, etc.?
4. Ask yourself how you wish you had handled the situation differently and commit to responding to similar situations differently in the future.
5. Try to make amends with the people you hurt. This may not always be possible if they are not willing to cooperate – all you can do is your part. Offer a genuine and sincere apology without defending yourself, accept responsibility and do what is reasonable to make it right.
6. Make peace with yourself. Choosing to hold onto your guilt forever will only make a bad situation worse over time. Think about the mistake long enough to learn from it, but move past it.

Did he ever think about Point 2 atleast after Pakhi blamed him? Did he think about point 4? Shouldn’t he be thinking all of these? Does he ever think?

He doesn’t even think that the way he proposed Sai was wrong. He should be thinking that too. He has zero self introspection. A person has to if they want to fix things in their life.

If it is guilt for Pakhi, he needs to know what he can do to fix it and also it should be him who should get rid of it. If not, in his own guilt, he will be spoiling Sai’s future too. He is expecting that Sai understands his feelings and give a chance to their marriage. But before all that he should first try to come out of his guilt if that is what is keeping him and Pakhi connected. He cannot forever feel like this for Pakhi. By doing so, he is not breaking the link with her, not breaking the unsaid bond between them. He has to completely break all ties with her if he loves Sai and wants to move on with Sai. Just having and claiming that he has feelings for Sai isn’t enough. It has to be seen in his actions. The first most important thing is protecting Sai.

Whoever his first protective instinct is for, is the most important person of his life. And if that is going to be some other woman, then I wouldn’t ever want to be that man as my partner or anyone’s partner. One can save a child or an old woman or anyone out of humanitarianism but protecting ex’s honour, not caring about wife’s honour is not goodness, it seems to be something else which he himself doesn’t even realise probably.

I agree with you about joint family and all but a spouse would always know where and how to draw lines. His and Pakhi’s relationship is so complicated that he cannot afford to protect her every time. There are others and she herself can/should do it if needed. He is no one. When Sai said that Samrat is a very nice person in the room when he Pakhi and Sai we’re talking, Virat felt bad that she was looking at everyone’s goodness but for his, then how is Sai supposed to feel when Virat always supports and speaks high of Pakhi and puts her down, insults her and thinks low of her like badtameez, nasamajh given their past? Such a basic thing to think. One should think and act. Should not become so self consumed that they cannot even understand what is hurting their spouse, what could hurt their spouse. He hasn’t got a basic understanding of how a spouse should act. He should be with Sai and not Pakhi. That is a very basic thing he fails in so no point in him expecting that Sai understands him IMO. As I have said already, the guy should introspect and he never does.

Tagging Nethra since we have been having this discussion for a while now.

I think you missed tagging me....😆

Agree. Agree. Agree. I agree 1000% with your post.

How is Virat saying he is not committed to Pakhi going to help if his actions are contrary to his words. He doesn't draw boundaries with her, let's her interfere in his relationship with Sai, joins her in insulting his wife when he is angry, is protective of her but doesn't care to come clean with cafe incident to his wife. How else will a wife interpret all this other than how Sai has done? This is one issue where one cannot be too careful....a little slip (even unintentional) and it has the potential to cause a tornado in a marriage. Or are we to assume that he is waiting for Sai to accept him as her husband first before he starts behaving himself?

He is not dealing with his guilt well - not at all as you outlined. He has always been a 'quick-fix' man. He is again acting impulsively in response to his guilt. He is guilty so he is desperate to make sure Pakhi moves on with Samrat - that is his solution. But he is making the same mistake as before (during SamrAkhi wedding)....trying to salvage a tricky situation with quick-fix solutions. And by sticking stubbornly to his scheme of things - he making a lot of miscalculation, errors in judgement and jeopardizing his relationship with Sai.

@red Yes...which is why I accuse him of lacking in common sense.

@blue I agree. I keep wondering.....is it why, delusional as she is, Pakhi still finds it worthwhile (and a haq) to accuse him of betraying her? Pakhi still feels that the connection is not yet cut completely? (Not saying she is not delusional)

@purple What might YOU be implying? I can understand what conclusion a spouse will make of it all.

@green Is this protective instinct coming from his guilt - towards Pakhi as well as Samrat. He feels responsible for the mess and wants to 'fix' their lives at all costs.

Bringing your quote from another thread. Virakhi familiarity with each other always upsets me.

Originally posted by: laksh

Having said the above, what I am thinking at the moment is yes, he is able to relate to her since she is similar to him but it is because sometimes when we are in pain or when we are wrong, we can relate to someone else who are in similar such situation. What I feel is that he is a guy who doesn’t have control over his emotions and he is probably able to see happening to Pakhi as well. This is what I mean by saying he is able to relate to her. He makes mistakes since he fails to control his emotions and he probably got to realise when Pakhi became too emotional this time and acting desperate that she is also failing to control her emotions. Sometimes, more than the good qualities, we empathise with people who are in the same struggle as us. Him not able to control his emotions is also a struggle he is going through and I think that is why he is sympathising with Pakhi now.

May be once she comes out of this, once she is able to move on, he won’t get into her business. It could him helping her genuinely, as a friend or an acquaintance. I am not sure but just guessing since we aren’t getting a clarity on this at the moment.

This is what I feel too. Somewhere he relates to her. And you have described the nuances so perfectly. Loved it so much❤️. I have a bakwaas but pet theory that Virakhi are positioned close together in all scenes to indicate that they are mirror images - both impulsive, both too carried away by emotions and both capable of going to the darker side in what they want. Will a director be this stupid to not even know of such simple things? Sometimes directors use symbolism and metaphor to convey something - either a mood or a situation without using dialogues. So Virakhi always standing together and Sai alone may be used to convey Sai's position and predicament to the audience - clearly indicating that Virakhi are still connected and Sai feels isolated. All said and done all this may just be my imagination. 🤪

When he is angry, he has got this bad habit of 'ganging up' , trying to find support.... irrespective of the morals/intentions of the people supporting him. It does not have to be Pakhi, it could be anybody - Bhavani, Sonali. And Pakhi knows how to play him like no other...when he is angry, he literally dances to her tunes.

Tagging since we were discussing about this. Ignore if you prefer.

Though the post is one day ago I saw it now. So replying. Answer resounding NO

Sai who doesn’t think twice to ask uncomfortable questions and unafraid to put people in their place is not giving to Virat is my grouse.

She can tell him straight away I respect you and start developing feelings for you but Pakhi is always there to make me take a step back.

Your unconditional support to her kind of makes me question if she will be there in the peripherals always in our marriage.

Your family abuses me and you don’t support me. my attendance and studies are getting affected because of the drama that happens at home.

the main purpose I came here is to become a doctor. Except that I am becoming everything!

So I am leaving you once for all. Thanks for the support!

And she should just leave. Enough with Virat questioning her if Sai thinks if he is joota or bemaan ! I mean seriously dude you did lie about Pakhi and the cafe kaand to the whole family including Sai.

Everytime she questions you give her jelebhi answers or get angry. Tbh enough is enough. I am too tired to watch this crap 😏