Raghav's car screeched stop at the corner of a deserted street in the middle of the night as he was taking a detour to avoid all the traffic in the heart of the city but ended up getting lost and eventually finding a way out, only for the car to break down. He should have paid attention in map reading classes, he woefully thought. The city was becoming quite populated. He went about recalling his teenage years when he would run around the neighborhood without a care and wouldn't bother about the cars as there were hardly any. Then again, he lived in the outskirts of the city where it was all quite and peaceful, silent enough to hear the birds chirping in the morning hours and hear the songs of the crickets in the late hours of the night, with the winds whistling as if striking a melody in tune with the songs of the crickets. Life was pleasant as a child. The only worry one had was that of homework and nothing else. If he got to watch his favorite cartoon, which happened to be Tom and Jerry, and eat a scoop of ice cream the same day, it was almost as if God personally stepped down from his heavenly abode to bless him.
Amma was happier those days, going about her daily routine of thrashing her kids if they acted out of order, or bossing around his mellow father if he did not put his shoes in the shoe rack. Amma definitely was the don of their house, he mused. Keerti, as usual, was quite dramatic when it came to their childhood, often demanding a doll house or new clothes, but was that not what all girls did? His favorite was Arjun, the soul of their family. His naive but curious questions often baffled everyone in their village, be it the village head or the most learned man around there. For a boy his age, he surely asked wise questions. One day he happened to ask where people go after they die as he heard that the neighbors dog had died. He also asked what death meant. His father ruffled his hair and asked him to look at the stars, saying that is where people went. As for death, how could anyone explain that to a five year old? But Arjun was amused, the stars were pretty and that place looked better than earth. He innocently told their Amma that he will go there soon enough, which led Amma to gather him in her arms and sob her heart out, Arjun being oblivious to her feelings. Fate plays cruel tricks. Arjun soon left to find out where people go after dying and as much as Raghav possessed a practical mind, for this one instance, he always believed that his Arjun was the brightest star in the night sky. He hated the city for this reason, too much cloud cover and pollution, he often could not spot the stars in the sky, he could not spot his Arjun.
Lost in his thoughts, Raghav did not realize that he needed to check his car. He pulled the ignition once again but the car failed to start. Cursing under his breath, he called Farhad.
"Farhad, first I want to get rid of this betrayer", Raghav spoke exasperatedly over the phone. It was obvious that Farhad was confused, probably wondering who dared crossed his Anna's path. Being the calm one between the two of them, Farhad took in a deep breath which often helped him tackle this man on the other side of the phone. Sometimes Farhad wondered how his Anna could have such a hot head, as if the Sun was residing directly above his little head. The image made Farhad chuckle. After all, this was his coping mechanism, picturing Raghav as the devil, sometimes a cartoon and sometimes as a train wreck. He was all that combined on difficult days. Farhad also respects Amma for bringing up this extremely difficult to deal with child. He practically bows down to the spirit of Pallavi for taming this lion, with a mane so thick, that let alone enemies, even the voice of reason could not be driven through his thick skull.
"Farhad, are you there or you've dozed off?' asked Raghav in irritation. Farhad sent out a little prayer to God to grant this hot headed man some patience. He could do with some.
"Yes Anna, I'm listening but kindly explain to me in simpler terms, what is the matter?", Farhad spoke ever so calmly, which automatically calmed down Raghav. Farhad had that aura, like a calm and cool breeze of air, calming down the greatest storms in a jiffy.
"My car broke down", Raghav sighed. "Can you send another one?'
'Anna, where are you? I will come for you", spoke Farhad immediately. Raghav's safety was of utmost importance and from the sound of it, it seemed like Raghav refused to travel with his bodyguard. Again! Farhad made a mental note to report him to Pallavi though he was sure that she also tried her best with him and sometimes failed. Thick skulled man!
"I am at some deserted corner in the outskirts of Hyderabad. I'll send you the location", Raghav spoke. Uber was not an option as Raghav was instructed never to use public transport and at the odd hour of the night, chances of him getting a ride was low in this part of the outskirts.
"Okay Anna. Do you have your gun?", Farhad asked slightly worriedly.
"Yes I do. Don't worry, I can protect myself. Raghav Rao is still the lion of this city, Ardam ayinda!", Raghav confidently spoke which made Farhad roll his eyes. Raghav's habit of speaking in the third person irritated Farhad but he could never voice his opinion. This man was a grown child sometimes, he thought. But he was his brother, his life line and he will always be grateful to have this grown child in his life.
"Okay Anna, stay put, I should be there in an hour. I am hoping the traffic is low, at least that is what google maps says. See you in a while Anna", and with that he disconnected and got right into his car.
Raghav got into his car and waited for Farhad. His stomach started rumbling and he cursed himself to ignore Pallavi's request to pack him a quick fix. "Damn it, stomach, stop making those sounds", he spoke to his stomach. Raghav thought he was turning crazy. Pallavi's weird habit of speaking to her tummy finally got to him! He searched his car in case there was some old lunch bar or chocolate in his glove box but what he saw made him smile slightly, glowing in the love of Pallavi. She had sneaked in a box of food and along with it was a handwritten note, which made him grin. His saree ka dukan was a wonderful woman!!
'Ghamandi Rao, I know your stomach. It rumbles at the wrong time and I don't want you to scold it, so eat this when that happens", read the note which made Raghav laugh out loud. His wife knew him too well. He quickly opened the tiffin and found a nicely wrapped paneer roll, and it was hot too!!
"I LOVE YOU Saree Ka Dukan!!", he spoke as he took the first bite and savored the deliciousness of his wife's hand cooked meal. The paneer roll was perfect. Hot and sweet, just like his wife. The thought of his wife made him wonder about how the new member of their family. Will it be a girl or a boy? Raghav hoped it was a girl, just like Pallavi. He was not ready to handle a mini Raghav any time soon and each time he thought of this scenario, he sent out several mental apologies to his Amma for putting up with him! Of course, he would never admit to this to her. The thought of fatherhood did not scare him but surely it made him a bit jittery, just as all new parents often felt on the arrival of a bundle of joy. Raghav took out his pocket diary and started jotting down his feelings. The diary helped him cope with his varied emotions. It felt like emptying the mind and heart and letting the diary hold his feelings. Some day, he will read it out to his baby girl, only the good parts, he thought.
Headlights of a car beamed just around the corner, announcing Farhad's arrival. He received a call from Farhad at the same time confirming his arrival. Farhad tried to park adjacent to Raghav's car but the street was so narrow, he only managed to park his car slightly behind Raghav's. Farhad stepped out to receive his boss who was already out of his car, waiting to take off. "Patience, God, give him some patience", thought Farhad. A second man walked out from the other side, who Raghav identified as their trusted mechanic, Harry.
"Anna, Harry will check the car, we can probably wait for 15 minutes and if's going to take longer, then he will get it towed and we can go to the meeting together", said Farhad, to which Anna gave his signature nod. That meant that he was highly impressed with Farhad otherwise the man could never stop cribbing.
'Okay, but I can't sit here, let's go to the nearby dhaba, I saw one around the corner", Raghav answered, gesturing the closeness of the dhaba.
"Okay Anna. Let me instruct Harry".
Farhad and Raghav got into the car and headed to the dhaba. Farhad was slightly taken aback. His Anna never stopped at dhaba's. He wondered what got into him on this odd hour of the night. Raghav was a multi faceted man and it was almost impossible to catch on his train of thought, yet this is what made his extremely endearing to his loved ones. Pallavi too, loved this trait. He would come up with the most profound thoughts and could put to words his emotions after a long thinking session. Maybe that is what he had been doing all this time while waiting for Farhad; putting his thoughts into words.
The ride was quiet and quite short, about five minutes. Farhad knew not to speak when Anna was quiet and lost in thought. He would come out of it eventually and break the silence with one of his wise talks. It was a rarity to find Raghav in a pensive mood and only those extremely close to him could catch a glimpse of this side of "The Raghav Rao".
They both stepped out and sat on the bench outside the dhaba. The owner was sleeping inside the kiosk like structure without a worry in the world. Raghav was looking at him intensely, probably wondering how a person could be at peace, rather sleep peacefully. The ghosts of his past did not let him sleep peacefully even after he earned his forgiveness from his Amma and Keerti. Even after Pallavi walked into his life and mended the broken pieces of his life. Even after knowing that he will soon be a father. Nothing helped him get past the trauma, and Raghav already figured that it was only because he had not forgiven himself. All his life he battled to seek forgiveness from his Amma and Keerti but little did he know, that was just a hill and Raghav had to climb a mountain, marred with guilt, self loathe and a sense of self destruction. Yet he knew that he will surely reach the peak and for that, he secretly visited his therapist.
'Farhad, do you sleep peacefully too?", asked Raghav in a broken voice. Farhad looked at his Anna, knowing exactly what was going through his mind. He was his confidant and his brother. Words were not required in their mode of communication, for they picked on the auras of each other.
"Yes, Anna. I do", replied Farhad, slowly. He decided to edge him slightly, maybe he would divulge more. "Why do you ask Anna?".
Raghav stared into the darkness of the street, not looking at anything in particular.
"You know, when I was a small boy, I used to walk on such streets, pretending that the dried maize cob was a ball. Poverty existed in our lives, yet I did not know what it meant. I was happy, content with the maize cob", Raghav spoke in a low voice almost as if the child from those years was speaking these words through a portal.
"Anna, children never worry about poverty. That is the beauty of childhood," Farhad wisely spoke.
"Yes, you are right. You know, I used to get two rupees as pocket money and that used to the best day of my life", smiled Raghav, reminiscing the old golden days. Farhad smiled with him, recollecting his younger days, which were not too different from Raghav's. They shared similar backgrounds on the financial front.
"What did you do with the two rupees, Anna?', asked Farhad. The mood was lightening up, he sensed.
Raghav spoke with a child like innocence, almost as if the ten year old Raghav was resurfacing from underneath the heavily layered complex man.
"I bought ice popsicles for Arjun and Keerti even though Amma had specifically told me to avoid giving them ice popsicles. They were too young, you see", he spoke excitedly.
"You never ate ice popsicles, Anna?" asked Farhad and Raghav went back to his pensive mode. He thought of how poverty deprived children of little pleasures of life as it did to him, though he did not feel the same way when he was in that moment but in hindsight, it was almost as if there was always enough for just one or two children but not all and the eldest would often sacrifice his happiness for the sake of his siblings.
"There was never enough to sustain all of us. But you know, Arjun and Keerti used to leave their half for me. Arjun would feed me with his tiny hands....", Raghav trailed off. Farhad could almost hear Raghav's heartbreak at the mention of Arjun. It was not everyday that Raghav brought him up in their conversations because it meant walking on shattered glass.
"Today I have tonnes of money and I can afford a bunch of popsicle factory, but there's no pleasure greater than eating that one small piece from the hands of a loved one", said Raghav. Every word he spoke agreed to Farhad's sentiments. As if they were both living their moments from the past together.
"Anna, what do you miss the most from your childhood?", asked Farhad. He wanted to know what was making his Anna so edgy and emotional right now.
"I miss the peace. I miss walking on empty streets, kicking the maize cob. I miss my friends. I miss jumping in the puddle of rain water. I miss my mothers smile. I miss dozing off in the living room, only to find myself neatly tucked in my bed the next day. I miss the little happiness I derived from two rupees. I miss homework. I miss the beatings from my school teacher. I miss my puppy...we had named him Mr. Popsicle Rao. I miss my first crush, my little sweetheart, Maya. I miss my father's music. I miss his voice. I miss his wise words.....I miss my dear Arjun", he chocked on his words at the mention of Arjun. There was something which made him miss Arjun greatly these days, leaving a deep ache in his heart. He could not even speak to Pallavi about it. His nights were getting tougher.
Farhad knew there was more. He placed an understanding hand on Raghav's shoulder, urging him to continue. Raghav let his silent tears drop, it was easier to cry than to let it all in. He was unable to cry in the presence of Pallavi ever since she was expecting. He did not want her to worry about him. He wanted her to be happy and always smiling. She was beautiful with the baby bump and her never ending parade of words.
"Farhad, you know what I miss the most?", asked Raghav, looking at him.
"No, Anna."
"I miss myself. I miss the carefree, unburdened Raghav. I miss the boy who smiled all day and spoke endlessly. I sometimes don't know how I changed so much. I don't recognize myself sometimes, I don't even know if I'll be a loving father......", Raghav spoke. His words were finally making sense to Farhad. The baby. Raghav was feeling worthless and incapable of being a good father. He finally understood his Anna.
"Anna, you will be a good father. You will be a loving father. My Ammi always says that a child does not need money. Love suffices. Unconditional love. You are capable of unconditional love. You take care of everyone around you, how can you not take care of your own child, Anna?", reasoned Farhad, somewhat assuring Raghav of his capacity to be selfless.
"I fear that I will destroy my family, Farhad. Arjun died because of me. He was a baby, he did not deserve such a painful death", Raghav broke down and hid his face in the large of his palms. Farhad was at a loss of comforting words. He let him cry, sitting silently by his side. A few minutes passed and Raghav's sobs reduced as he regained his demeanor.
"Anna, you need to forgive yourself. If you want to be a good father, learn to forgive yourself first. What happened was not your fault", spoke Farhad very firmly. Raghav was astounded with the depth Farhad possessed. No one, not even his therapist had figured out that Raghav was still beating himself about what happened. His sessions with his therapist were still skin deep as he found it difficult to open up about his emotions, but Farhad read him like an open book.
Raghav pondered over the words as Farhad continued to speak, this time in a softer tone.
"Anna, your parents gifted you a beautiful childhood. They protected you from the evilness of poverty for as long as they could. They gave you memories that you still cherish. They gave you the best days of your life. You have to walk in their footsteps and gift your child the greatest gift of all times: A beautiful childhood. It is all we have left in the last days of our lives. It is what helps us live through difficult times. I know you have money. But it hardly matters. Do what your parents did and your child will forever be thankful to you".
After moments of comfortable silence, Raghav smiled. Farhad was relieved.
"Farhad, my kids will have the best uncle in you", he spoke fondly. This meant good. This meant Raghav registered Farhad's wise words. This meant that Raghav was on the journey of forgiveness. It was a long stretch but Farhad was confident that his Anna will make it out stronger and he was sure that the child him and Pallavi were having will be one lucky child.
"It's been an hour!!", shrieked Raghav. I need to call Pallavi. Raghav reached out for his phone. His wife was going to haunt him if he delayed any further.
"Battery dead! What the hell! Why do they even make these phones if the battery life is going to be so horrible!!", exclaimed Raghav, now furious at his phone. Raghav Rao was back, mused Farhad. The Sun was definitely residing above this mans head!!
"Anna, the phones come with a charger, when did you charge your phone last?', chuckled Farhad. He knew Raghav was forgetful and then would take out all the anger on his surroundings.
Raghav looked at Farhad as if he was going to smash his face for pointing out the obvious. Before he could say anything, Farhad's phone rang. It was Pallavi.
"Yes, bhabhi", he quickly answered. Lady Don should not be ignored.
"Where is Raghav?" She sounded desperate, breathing heavily.
"Yes Pallu! I'm so sorry.....I...", Raghav had no explanation.
"GET TO THE HOSPITAL MR. RAO, YOUR BABY IS ENROUTE", she screamed, loud enough to startle Farhad.
"What!!!!" exclaimed both Raghav and Farhad. The meeting long forgotten, they both got into Farhad's car and headed back to the city. Baby Rao just announced it's arrival at the most odd hour of the night. 2 AM!! This baby is going to be a riot, thought Raghav.
"The baby was not due until a week later, Farhad. How is this possible!", Raghav spoke nervously. His feet were continuously shaking, as if he were operating a sewing machine.
'Anna, it is possible. My sister also went through the same. Don't worry", Farhad spoke as he navigated his way onto the highway. Raghav relaxed a bit yet his thoughts took him back to the gender. Girl or boy?
Farhad put some music on to calm the nerves of his panicky Anna. The sight was like nothing else. He had never seen Raghav so nervous before. He could almost see beads of perspiration on his forehead. Farhad wanted to laugh but he knew that if he even let out a small chuckle, Raghav would throw him out of the window.
The drive to the hospital was an hour long, even though Farhad drove at 120km/hr. He could not go beyond this even though Raghav insisted on going at 180km/hr.
"Anna, we need to get there alive", said Farhad, giving a stern look to Raghav. He knew this look. Farhad was a calm man but the days he carried this particular look, everyone kept their heads low and abide by his instructions. Raghav kept calm through the rest of the journey, with constant calls to Amma. Pallavi was still in labor but the doctors said she was fine. She will probably give birth in the next hour.
They reached the hospital at about 3.30 AM and Raghav dashed right to the maternity ward. He found Amma in the waiting room. Pallavi had not yet given birth. She had passed out once out of the sheet intensity of the contractions. Raghav was led to the room where Pallavi was resting. The sight of her slight, tired frame made his heart constrict with an unplaced emotion. He did not see his wife in her. He saw a woman who was fighting tooth and nail to bring a new life into this world. His baby. The respect he held for women grew tenfold this day.
"Hey", he softly pecked her head and held her hand.
"Hey", she said, with half open eyes and a teary face.
"How are you?', he asked, concern written all over his handsome face. He did feel sorry for putting her through this ordeal.
"I'm now fine. I did not want you to miss the birth of our first child", she whispered. In spite of being in extreme pain and mess, she looked divine. Heavenly. It was like God was peeking right through the eyes of a woman who was going to deliver new life into His world.
"I am here now....you need to be strong", he said as he squeezed her hand.
Contraction. Another one. And many more. Raghav Rao confused. Desperate. Anxious. Pallavi screaming. Holding his hand tightly. Doctors going about their routine. Nurses calming them down. Pushing. More pushing. Screams. Heavy breathing. Raghav sweating. More pushing.
And finally, the beautiful sound of new born crying, sending sounds out in the universe of its arrival. The best music to new parents. Pallavi passed out, Raghav on the verge of tears.
"Congratulations!! It's a boy!". The doctor announced the arrival of baby Rao in jubilation. The nurses were gushing over the beautiful lush hair the baby had, while the doctor completed the other formalities. Raghav was frozen. Happy, but frozen. It was impossible to put his feelings into words this time round.
Baby boy. Mini Raghav Rao. Riot Rao. BABY RIOT RAO!!
Raghav fainted.
Baby Riot Rao was here to give Raghav Rao a taste of himself!
END.
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Hey everyone,
This is something I felt like writing since I'm craving to see Raghav and Farhad's bonding on the show. It also goes deeper into exploring the beauty of childhood. I definitely miss my childhhood. What about you?
Let me know what you think Baby Riot Rao should be named.
Finally, let me know how you liked this in your comments. I'd love to read them.
Thank you and best wishes,
ps: memento mori - I know I have to update this story. I am working on it.
Kiara.
Tagging Farag fans.
Cricket
CID
