Independence what is it afterall - Page 2

Originally posted by: MuteButton

Yeah, i do not know how empowerment and marrying her off to Sunder go hand in hand. Not saying his profession is demeaning. Just that woh house help hai toh if she marries him woh house help ki biwi hi keh laayegi. How does that do her standing any good? Agar yeh samjh aa jaaye ke isse uska status kaise elevate hota hai toh mujhe smjha dena olz but guess yeh too big hai sochne ke liye before making wishlists 😆

And what is with the erasure of her marriage like Aditya did. Aditya toh phir bhi character hai, woh kare jo us character ko karna hai. But she is married period. Jaisi bhi hui ho, she is married. Do baar to the same man. Her faith in that marriage, is a thing of beauty in these times. I may not advocate for it completely, but look at that character’s faith right. That is a strength that not a lot of people these days possess. Why does this character have to marry someone else to become relevant. Waise bhi, jealousy does not necessarily mean you get disgruntled by looking at your loved one with the opposite gender. It maybe something as small as having a conversation with another person that can spark anger in someone. Aditya will not need a male alone to feel jealous/ territorial about Imlie.

I toh get all 🤯 about aisa kya mik jaayega ji nahi mila.. not like they will suddenly start hormonal nonsense caz jealousy hi gaya hai 🙄 and as you said woh toh kisi se bhi hi sakti hai woh toh malini and imlie ka behnapa dekh je bhi hi sakti hai 😅🤷‍♀️

Nice post Fary that requires a thoughtful reply.

I will make an attempt to pen my thoughts, it may be a bit rambling.

Independence to a woman means many different things. As for as Imlie is concerned, the show itself not the character, there are many things to ponder about.

A girl child when she is born, is considered as goddess Lakshmi and celebrated whereas in some parts of the world, they are considered as a burden.

A girl is not given a choice of subjects to study or choose the boy she wishes to marry, instead in many cases, the choice is taken out of her hands.

Let us look at the characters in the show - we have the C's and the T's. If I look at Anu for all her wealth and privileged upbringing, her thinking is narrow. She is a prisoner of her own thinking and society, stuck in a loveless marriage. Makes me wonder if she decided to stick around for the sake of society or for her child.

Malini - Who is brought up in a dysfunctional family and is emotionally fragile, insecure, who constantly needs attention. she is city bred, well educated and is working as a professor. She found her own partner, rebelled against her mom to marry Adi. Is she truly independent when she is emotionally so dependent on her parents and Adi. Her journey following the breakup with Adi, if portrayed and written well, should showcase her journey of becoming independent.

A contrast between Imlie and Malini who has her father's name and husbands name, still unable to function, broke down when faced with a stressful situation of her own making, whilst the other is shown as forged from steel, capable of weathering any storm, moving on.

In a relation or marriage, one expects respect, equal rights and understanding, weathering all storms together. They have shown Adilie kadam se kadam milakar chalne ki, even eating their food in sync. wonder if you caught that brief FB.. 😉

Imlie is making her own choices now, emboldened by the support from Adi and SK who have drilled into her, not to give up, to raise her voice for justice. Education plays an important role in a woman's life and so does their thinking. If the thinking is regressive, then no amount of education can erase the actions of a regressive person.

My 2 cents 😃

Can anybody ( men included ) be a full independent by her/his own?

Everybody need another shoulder to lean on in sad times, share a happy moment, go over and discuss ideas and decisions with, feel loved and wanted!

Is this thing you only find in husband/wife?

You can find in a relative, a friend too!

If you didn't find this support in a partner it will not lead to a healthy relation!

So now what independent is?

It is the ability to take a decision by yourself, and to navigate your life as you wish, with respect to others, to make your own choices, make your own mistakes and learn from it!

And Imlie does that already! Right, she sometimes run out of choices, but at the end she choose how to deal with them!

Removing her married look was her call, he didn't ask her to do that, yes he was mad he didn't like it and lash about it, but she is the one who decide to remove them!

Being a maid, is her call too! Yes he brought her home without a wife title, but he didn't choose the maid title for her either! He kept silent, she introduced her self to the T as someone looking for a job and willing to do household to them! So to begin with the maid was her call to stay at T house. She could have told the truth, or at least kept silent and made him put a lie!

She is the one who accept his marriage, she accept that it is not his fault!

When she had a second thought she stand for herself and asked for her rights, and he was ready to tell the truth, but again the reality hit her hard, and made her back off and giving Millani her sindoor and other things at the wedding was her choice also none asked her for anything!

She decided to left him when she felt insulted that he didn't respect her faith!

And now she decide to let him go, and that maid title will not work for her anymore!

So yes she is too much independent, and already made a lot of decisions which contributed with the mess Aditya had created!

Yes she has her share in this mess too!

Now we came to the pairing thing!

Yes everyone needs a partner in life, but could a girl just become enough for herself?

Absolutely yes! Actually some relation could be an energy draining , being alone is much better!

So why we as ppl do not accept that? Respect each other faiths and choices in life?

She told him, You are my only husband, this is her faith talking, she left him due questioning this fact!

Yes we would love to see her happy and move on of such relation, but it is her choice her faith, she will learn how to manage!

A lot of women out their, live a lone , raising their children by themself without man support! No matter what the reason is for a missing partner( death or divorce) , but a woman could do fine by herself!

And yes I want to see her with Aditya, not because she need him, and she could not survive without him, but because they love each other, and complement each other, and she really deserve a happy ending!

Originally posted by: nim_var

Nice post Fary that requires a thoughtful reply.

I will make an attempt to pen my thoughts, it may be a bit rambling.

Independence to a woman means many different things. As for as Imlie is concerned, the show itself not the character, there are many things to ponder about.

A girl child when she is born, is considered as goddess Lakshmi and celebrated whereas in some parts of the world, they are considered as a burden.

A girl is not given a choice of subjects to study or choose the boy she wishes to marry, instead in many cases, the choice is taken out of her hands.

Let us look at the characters in the show - we have the C's and the T's. If I look at Anu for all her wealth and privileged upbringing, her thinking is narrow. She is a prisoner of her own thinking and society, stuck in a loveless marriage. Makes me wonder if she decided to stick around for the sake of society or for her child.

Malini - Who is brought up in a dysfunctional family and is emotionally fragile, insecure, who constantly needs attention. she is city bred, well educated and is working as a professor. She found her own partner, rebelled against her mom to marry Adi. Is she truly independent when she is emotionally so dependent on her parents and Adi. Her journey following the breakup with Adi, if portrayed and written well, should showcase her journey of becoming independent.

A contrast between Imlie and Malini who has her father's name and husbands name, still unable to function, broke down when faced with a stressful situation of her own making, whilst the other is shown as forged from steel, capable of weathering any storm, moving on.

In a relation or marriage, one expects respect, equal rights and understanding, weathering all storms together. They have shown Adilie kadam se kadam milakar chalne ki, even eating their food in sync. wonder if you caught that brief FB.. 😉

Imlie is making her own choices now, emboldened by the support from Adi and SK who have drilled into her, not to give up, to raise her voice for justice. Education plays an important role in a woman's life and so does their thinking. If the thinking is regressive, then no amount of education can erase the actions of a regressive person.

My 2 cents 😃

What a beautiful post nim

So very well said just the social status doesn't make one independent or superior.. ultimately it is the emotional strength the upbringing the soch that makes one independent and make one feel empowered. It is not whether you work as a naukrani or as a prime minister it is your own confidence you self respect your views in life.. how much you want to go along with the taqianoosi ways or want to break the shackles

As you right said in comparison Mrs C had everything that as if now Imlie lacks yet she is bound in this loveless marriage and for what they never really answers that.. to me it looks more like to not be stigmatized of being a divorcee she lived a bitter sad life never took the initiative to break free and raise her daughter independently .. what did she lacked nothing she is supposed to be educated has good financial standing as was mentioned dev married her for that and she had supposed himmat too as she said she went against her family to marry dev.. then why didn't she showed the same courage again .. let me answer caz she doesn't have the guts to live without the name of the man.. that is a stigma she doesn't want even though technically divorce wouldn't leave her child nameless caz she will forever still be chaturvedi it wouldn't stigmatized her so that bache ke liye seh lia makes hardly any sense..

She raised malini like that too malini on the surface has everything too yet she is khokli empty inside lacks the mental stability and courage..

Originally posted by: Guiltyo0o

Can anybody ( men included ) be a full independent by her/his own?

Everybody need another shoulder to lean on in sad times, share a happy moment, go over and discuss ideas and decisions with, feel loved and wanted!

Is this thing you only find in husband/wife?

You can find in a relative, a friend too!

If you didn't find this support in a partner it will not lead to a healthy relation!

So now what independent is?

It is the ability to take a decision by yourself, and to navigate your life as you wish, with respect to others, to make your own choices, make your own mistakes and learn from it!

And Imlie does that already! Right, she sometimes run out of choices, but at the end she choose how to deal with them!

Removing her married look was her call, he didn't ask her to do that, yes he was mad he didn't like it and lash about it, but she is the one who decide to remove them!

Being a maid, is her call too! Yes he brought her home without a wife title, but he didn't choose the maid title for her either! He kept silent, she introduced her self to the T as someone looking for a job and willing to do household to them! So to begin with the maid was her call to stay at T house. She could have told the truth, or at least kept silent and made him put a lie!

She is the one who accept his marriage, she accept that it is not his fault!

When she had a second thought she stand for herself and asked for her rights, and he was ready to tell the truth, but again the reality hit her hard, and made her back off and giving Millani her sindoor and other things at the wedding was her choice also none asked her for anything!

She decided to left him when she felt insulted that he didn't respect her faith!

And now she decide to let him go, and that maid title will not work for her anymore!

So yes she is too much independent, and already made a lot of decisions which contributed with the mess Aditya had created!

Yes she has her share in this mess too!

Now we came to the pairing thing!

Yes everyone needs a partner in life, but could a girl just become enough for herself?

Absolutely yes! Actually some relation could be an energy draining , being alone is much better!

So why we as ppl do not accept that? Respect each other faiths and choices in life?

She told him, You are my only husband, this is her faith talking, she left him due questioning this fact!

Yes we would love to see her happy and move on of such relation, but it is her choice her faith, she will learn how to manage!

A lot of women out their, live a lone , raising their children by themself without man support! No matter what the reason is for a missing partner( death or divorce) , but a woman could do fine by herself!

And yes I want to see her with Aditya, not because she need him, and she could not survive without him, but because they love each other, and complement each other, and she really deserve a happy ending!

Very well said.. needing a support system a partner is different then being independent.. that is choice while independence is about making that very choice on your own.. but sadly both the things are mixed all the time.

Being on a relationship, married unmarried is a choice that one gets to make as a result of being independent or dependent..

Imlie is already independent caz as you said she was the one taking the calls they both were kinda still supporting each others Im covering up the lie so in that way both of them are responsible and have their grey areas..

So much word for the last paragraph. It is not about caz she has no alternate choice so stay with Aditya nope not at all it is caz they have formed that emotional connect found that saath she longed for and the 2 people are at home with each other.. and that should be respected. IF IMLIE Can show the bada dil and look past the past past can viewers their isn't any need for bad blood then and random wedding planning in order to prove some lame woman empowerment point caz if we see logically both of them were thrown into this situation it wasn't like he had the choice to back off from that forced marriage and he did it to put shackles in imlie's foot that we need badla for

Lovely post and loved all the opinions. The word independent is so deep and meaningful that one can take it in any angle they wish to see. When we look at Imlie we already see a young fierce woman whom can stare her fears in the eye. She is pretty self reliant and bold when it comes to her emotions and relationship. She has built her self as such where she focuses her independence on the resolve of seeing others happy and her happiness is secondary. I feel this is where she should take the lead and claim what it hers to be had. For now I love the boldness she has shown in respecting his wishes and keeping her desires hidden from the marriage to her career her journey has been her own. She has stood with her believe when others thought she was wrong.

For me she is independent already bu the way she walks, talks and looks at herself. She neither cares what others have to say and doesn’t fear it’s say or question others believes. The simple fact is the conversation she has has with Aditya over faith v logic it has shown that she does think beyond the norm.

Her freedom to let go and wanting to build a better social standing doesn’t make her anymore independent for her thinking is already there it only empowers her to achieve far more. Her thinking is far more open then people see. We have seen woman like Maline and Anu even Tupali whom lay blame in others wanting to end there life or even find faults in others without reflecting within. Imlie has always looked within herself before she has judge lived with her conviction and her believes. Her right and wrong are determined upon the issue and nothing else. She has shown that education and faith can walk hand in hand yet in all this I still believe she is naive for she has seen love through the eyes of her mother and satyakaam but she has seen and felt unrequited love but will soon learn that passionate love is a free flowing and giving. It will make feel far more empowered she is yet to feel she can be someone choice too and that what she will soon discover with Aditya.

She already has her own identity. She was always a daughter, friend and visionary once job of social status or likes especially when it comes to clothes define the power they represent. She is bold and brave already and that what independence means to me. Her choice to be whom she is makes her the fiercest at all. Yes with time as she grown her taste and choices will change but once again that hers to control alone. So her job her lifestyle she all don’t make her any less independent then she already is but actually she is proud of whom she has become of it and where she can go with these life experiences she has had so far. As she has said before she is simple village girl wanting to achieve her dream she never said she want to run away from whom she already is.

For me I just want her to have the independence of having the choice to chose whom she loves and how. Plus a female lead in salwaar suits is refreshing to see 😊

My first post in this forum ...the topic and subject in hand is too tempting to not post...

I pretty much agree with the topic maker as to me independence and empowerment is abt a woman or man being able to make their choice as they feel and i think Imlie has done well there ...she may have not had the independence to not have that forced marriage or to not have come to delhi with Adi initially bec of the circumstances but post that making her place in adityas family was all her own doing ...she stayed with tripathis on her own terms as a person and formed relationships as per her choice ...the whole being servant was circumstantial ( empowerment and independence do fall prey to circumstances unless u r a rebel which imlie isnt ) And to say she is dependent on Tripathis i d say they are more dependent on her inc Adi now ...she has always managed to create that independent atmosphere around her to have her say speak her mind even to Adi when he wasnt too friendly with her and she is even making her own choices when it comes to Adi n their relationship ...she has somewhere always managed to have her way with him after a pt ...its been shown that Adi was dictating her around but i have always felt somewhere she was getting the better of him always.

Independence and Empowerement is also not abt moralistic hi fi lectures or sermons but its more about the power of being able to be yourself anywhere and everywhere and be accepted as u r and Imlie has successfully done that!

Imlie is equally independent and empowered whether she chooses to stay with Adi as servant wife live in partner or whatever or she chooses to dump him n move on because its going to be her choice!

Originally posted by: raaz19

Lovely post and loved all the opinions. The word independent is so deep and meaningful that one can take it in any angle they wish to see. When we look at Imlie we already see a young fierce woman whom can stare her fears in the eye. She is pretty self reliant and bold when it comes to her emotions and relationship. She has built her self as such where she focuses her independence on the resolve of seeing others happy and her happiness is secondary. I feel this is where she should take the lead and claim what it hers to be had. For now I love the boldness she has shown in respecting his wishes and keeping her desires hidden from the marriage to her career her journey has been her own. She has stood with her believe when others thought she was wrong.

For me she is independent already bu the way she walks, talks and looks at herself. She neither cares what others have to say and doesn’t fear it’s say or question others believes. The simple fact is the conversation she has has with Aditya over faith v logic it has shown that she does think beyond the norm.

Her freedom to let go and wanting to build a better social standing doesn’t make her anymore independent for her thinking is already there it only empowers her to achieve far more. Her thinking is far more open then people see. We have seen woman like Maline and Anu even Tupali whom lay blame in others wanting to end there life or even find faults in others without reflecting within. Imlie has always looked within herself before she has judge lived with her conviction and her believes. Her right and wrong are determined upon the issue and nothing else. She has shown that education and faith can walk hand in hand yet in all this I still believe she is naive for she has seen love through the eyes of her mother and satyakaam but she has seen and felt unrequited love but will soon learn that passionate love is a free flowing and giving. It will make feel far more empowered she is yet to feel she can be someone choice too and that what she will soon discover with Aditya.

She already has her own identity. She was always a daughter, friend and visionary once job of social status or likes especially when it comes to clothes define the power they represent. She is bold and brave already and that what independence means to me. Her choice to be whom she is makes her the fiercest at all. Yes with time as she grown her taste and choices will change but once again that hers to control alone. So her job her lifestyle she all don’t make her any less independent then she already is but actually she is proud of whom she has become of it and where she can go with these life experiences she has had so far. As she has said before she is simple village girl wanting to achieve her dream she never said she want to run away from whom she already is.

For me I just want her to have the independence of having the choice to chose whom she loves and how. Plus a female lead in salwaar suits is refreshing to see 😊

Agreed ! Just because she is living at somebody's home under the guise of being a nukrani( which she isn't btw) doesn't make her dependent.. but somehow that is the only part that is visible to specific audience and everything else is unseen.. this is the girl who has taught big life lessons to supposed mature independent women in the very same household and why are they being toutues independent oh yeah caz they work outside of home.. and she does at home .. 😆

Aise toh dekha jaaye toh her koi kisi na kisi ka naukar hi hota hai even in outside world the jobs you do you are working for your employers makes you naukar hi in the wider use of term..

It is ridiculous to judge someone based on what they wear how they look and base how dependent or independent they are on that. Basically it mirrors AC ki soch exactly how she looks at imlie and cannot see beyond her pehnawa or her Background. Despite imlie time and again showing her wisdom and AC liking and appreciating it at times too still is too consumed by the idea of outer appearance and hence she unseen it caz imlie ke kapde simple hai she doesn't do makeup hairstyles. Lol shallow meters and bars to judge kisi ke soch and kisi ki sachaai

I would also like to mention here that I forgot earlier in reference to nim's post isn't it amusing to you guys the very same AC who herself never separated or divorces is so casually mentioning it for her daughter.. that kinda undoes my stigma theory too ke khud ko nahi lagne dena but Beti ke liye it is fine rofl

Thank you for raising the issue right here right noe.I was frustrated with random topics about Adilie and guesses that aren't suited to their personalities. I come here to AY post and ho out silently .Imlie is way more independent and strong willed than Aditya .Malini is the weakest of all of them.Talking about Imlie:s external appearance , I find it suitable and real. I don't want their characters to be butchered for petty romance.

Another paralle I wanted to draw was between the mothers on the show, namely the T's, Anu and Mithi.

Look at Mithi/Anu and how they have raised their daughters. Born to the same man but the differences in them are so stark, so divisive, right from their thinking, to facing difficulties, to standing up for justice or truth.

Mithi made her own bed and she paid a price for making a choice. She chose to spend the time with Dec, knowing fully well what could happen. Nothing could have prepared her for the heartbreak and betrayal that followed, but she did not let that experience come in the way of a raising a child with values and freedom to choose. She is not very educated but she trusts her child and let her be free within the confines of the village society, gave her a strong foundation as she knows firsthand how cruel the world can be. As she proudly stated to Dev, Imlie is pure, born of her love, she just is a ray of sunshine. she is guileless, unafraid to speak the truth and has more courage in her little frame than anyone I have seen.

The Tripathi women Aparna and Radha have raised good children and are in good marriages, where they have the affection, respect, bonding from their husbands and children. Rupi is separated and they have strived to make her life as comfortable as possible by supporting her, their grandchild, her various courses. At first, Rupi was shown to be negative but their love and understanding, overcame all of Rupi's fears and now she has made peace with her situation. She does not hold any grudge against her family and feels lonely, that is a battle she had to fight, to overcome.

Written about Anu already and nothing more to add for now.

Got to read up on the replies, good topic !