Spellbound and soothed but Spashtha se door... - Page 5

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Posted: 4 years ago
#41

Originally posted by: jane_austen

@bold Forget saying he will move out, the man didn't even insist that his 'wife' will live in the house no matter what - he settled for "..but where will she go"? A man who cannot defend the right of his wife to live in his house has no right to expect ANYTHING from her. Period.


I don't mind him telling them that he is leaving the house with his wife. It shows his support to her. All he had to do is tell them that she won't go anywhere but if she can't stay then he too will leave.

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Posted: 4 years ago
#42

Originally posted by: prs_725

No something is def missing .. either it’s story or dialogues or now we see a push and pull between both sides .. it’s like in between SaiRat .. one of them is not ready or happy at all to move forward w this and that’s Sai. She’s had enough of the chavan.. Virat is not the end in all for her to be happy. She can be happy and survive other ways and I think her constant reminders that she doesn’t feel homey is proof of that yet he does nothing to make her feel comfortable..



I think the script is coming out well .. Virat and Sai are both humans ..they flaws in their character are coming out clearly

..

When virat had agreed to marry Sai .. a lot of upheavals were going in his life .. he had lost his love .. and he was in love with pakhi .. ( normal kind of love ) and he was trapped in a vow to his mentor .. and also to his lost love .. so to be a knight in shining armour .. he went to rescue sayi .. as he thought he could

In that period there were 3 people in the room .. virat ( who loved pakhi ) and he saw sayi as his ward( kamal sir’s daughter )

that is why when pakhi left .. he shouted at sayi .... his relationship with pakhi was still muddled .. he had not adjusted to pakhi as his sister in law ..



but now atleast 3 months of marriage has passed..he no longer sees sayi as his ward ( there are only 2 people in the room .. a husband and a wife ) .. he is seeking the wife in her .. trying to bring her up in shape .. he realised she is something who would suit him very much ., He enjoys her company and finds her desirable.. at this moment . He has got over the attraction for pakhi .. because he has seen pakhi continuously for 3-4 months in the house .. and has adjusted to her in a platonic way .. there is no desire for her anymore .


problem is sayi doesn’t feel the same .. she had started looking at him like a husband in the first week but a few uncomfortable truths has made her lock her heart ..He has become her guardian .. and she’s no more locked in the house .. she has started going to college . Meeting a lot more people .. she knows she’s no more stuck in a sad situation.. that virat has to be her mentor . She knows she can survive with or without him ..

that’s why she’s coming to terms that she has to leave him one day .. so better keep the relationship formal and friendly ..


so will virat be able to get back his wife .. he had made a lot of wonderful vows .. I won’t invade ur space .. u need not fear me .. but now wants to break those walls .. sayi does not allow him to touch her .. and he wants too .. it is obvious..


Edited by msin - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago
#43

Originally posted by: scarlett22


Yes. It is Sai. She's totally curled up inwards where he is concerned. Why is he so obtuse ? He is not even trying to understand her. His question is only about himself...did she really apply that Alta for me?

Not even ..she got that allergy because she applied Alta for me, at least a one line introspection would've added some sensitivity to Virat. Or maybe he will verbalize it tomorrow.

I hope he does otherwise "woh kisi aur ko takleef mein nahi dekh saktey..." would be proven wrong. Yes he cant see someone in takleef but he shouldnt voice something that he doesnt know may cause someone takleef as welll..

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Posted: 4 years ago
#44

Originally posted by: msin



I think the script is coming out well .. Virat and Sai are both humans ..they flaws in their character are coming out clearly

..

When virat had agreed to marry Sai .. a lot of upheavals were going in his life .. he had lost his love .. and he was in love with pakhi .. ( normal kind of love ) and he was trapped in a vow to his mentor .. and also to his lost love .. so to be a knight in shining armour .. he went to rescue sayi .. as he thought he could

In that period there were 3 people in the room .. virat ( who loved pakhi ) and he saw sayi as his ward.. ..A guardian

that is why when pakhi left .. he shouted at sayi .... his relationship with pakhi was still muddled



but now atleast 3 months of marriage has passed..he no longer sees sayi as his ward .. he is seeking the wife in her .. trying to bring her up in shape .. he realised she is something who would suit him very much ., He enjoys her company and finds her desirable.. at this moment . He has got over the attraction for pakhi .. because he has seen pakhi continuously for 3-4 months in the house .. and has adjusted to her in a platonic way .. there is no desire for her anymore .


problem is sayi doesn’t feel the same .. she had started looking at him like a husband in the first week but a few uncomfortable truths has made her lock her heart ..He has become her guardian .. and she’s no more locked in the house .. she has started going to college . Meeting a lot more people .. she knows she’s no more stuck in a sad situation.. that virat has to be her mentor . She knows she can survive with or without him ..

that’s why she’s coming to terms that she has to leave him one day .. so better keep the relationship formal and friendly ..

very well said, his insecurities are getting the best of him.

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Posted: 4 years ago
#45

I think he did realize that the alta application despite knowing she had an allergy was the reason for the family drama. She agreed only coz aai said it would cause apshagun to him. He is pleasantly shocked that she'd do something for him and i think the whole looking for baking soda/ointment etc etc is supposed to be the concern/guilt stemming out of the realization that she applied Alta even though she had an allergy. Coz he said- you knew you had allergy, phir bhi you applied.

But spasht shabdon mein he didnt say/introspect so probably it didn't come through to many people. Plus he didn't overtly introspect on the fact that the so called "dhakka mukki" and attempts to force her etc happened coz she refused because of allergy. Not simply refused to be akkhad and pick a fight. She wasnt just being difficult/stubborn or throwing a tantrum like the family made it appear. She had a legit reason. Initially he thought ki "alta is chhoti cheez" - why did she refuse but now he knows. sai's silence in response to virat asking if she already knew she had an allergy spoke volumes. She didnt reply but i think its obvious to virat that she did know about the allergy.

And Ashwini also said that if given the reasons/and explained something pyaar se "phir kitni bhi takleef ho, she will do something" . So by takleef shes referring to allergy in this case. She put herself in atleast mild discomfort just coz she was told about the "meaning of thd ritual"

Larger point that was ignored is that kya iski sach mein zarurat thi. Jab allergy hai toh why are these rituals imposed by gharwaale. Allergy mild hai toh its fine. But virat should introspect on her actions. She is doing things for a few people that she likes which includes him (howeer virat keeps wanting verbal reassurance from her!) even though she is clearly unhappy about living there like an unpaid guest.

He keeps asking "am i not your family", am i not your apna, is there no one else you love in this house...but its not fair for him to expect verbal reassurance from her this early on in their relationship if he has put all these T&C in their marriage. She needs time to warm up to virat. How can she think of Virat as "family/apna/love" when pp is a constant reminder of his commitment, his family repeatedly reninds her that they dont regard her as bahu and treat her so badly. Its only his aai who has made her ponder about her relationship with Virat and the possibility that theres more "feelings " scares her because in her head she's probably constantly telling herself not to get attached to virat/people in this house coz this is all supposed to be temporary.

Edited by neeraja91 - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago
#46

Wow! It has been such a demanding day at my end here šŸ˜† i just got to read all the lovely insights. Since, almost everyone is on the same page, I would love to add that I agree with everyone who says that this whole "who-is-this-Virat" feeling is coming from the fact that he has not been able to get a grip on his feelings.

It was shallow how the whole "akele kahan rahegi" was just set aside but then on second thoughts, we have a scene coming up tomorrow -- and it might and it should throw some light.

I still think that the character is not going down the drain. We are only seeing the layers of his flaws that were hidden behind his armour suit as the lone warrior -cum-sacrificial lamb as the chaheeta beta of the family. I found his entire conduct over the alta shallow because he seems to be totally swallowed by his husband-ego and insecurity as an 'unwanted' husband. So, like any vulnerable person does, he latched on to this sudden feeling of importance that he felt when he heard that she applied the alta for him. I would have/still want him to explain the ease with which he said, "wo akeli kahan jayegi"... It is as indigestible to me as his challenge of jagtap se ladi toh meri family ko bhi jeeto -- to me, that will always remain an unpardonable comparison he made. So, if the script eventually tells us that his "wo akeli kahan rahegi" also needs to be recorded in the book of inexcusable slips, I am fine with that. Humans are allowed transgressions but what I want to see is then, how he proves himself worthy of this sudden urge to have all of this deal-wali wife so desperately. I need the connect between this newfound insecurity --that began from the time he heard her talk to Amey -- and his gradual falling in love. Without that connect, it seems shallow. Until the Amey scene happened, he was the "perfect image" of a man and husband we saw.

But that is where the beauty lies -- he is not perfect. We are actually seeing the raw emotions a man feels in such a state - why do we want the perfect image of a man. His behaviour is not coming from any malice but of utter indignation that his "authority" in the relationship has been challenged. Finally, there has come a reason for him to not want to be perfect. It is something he cannot fathom himself. As Ashwini said, "Aaj kal bohat gussa ho rahe ho, kya baat hai..." It is unlike him. Not just we as viewers, but even his close people can see it -- his mother wants to see it as him buckling under the pressure of the zimmedari; his family wants to see it as his frustration from being tied to an unworthy wife; his wife wants to see it as his frustration of having to suffer because of the deal-marriage and his yearning for Bhabhiji. But only he knows that it is none of the above is true. He is just overwhelmed because of a completely new feeling. He is unable to find control and it seems like it's only leaving him more and more amused at the way he's behaving himself.

Why I don't think it's a character degradation -- when things are rosy, we tend to overlook the flaws of the one we are enchanted by. When something goes wrong, we find even those actions that we first found "irresistible" as a flaw. He has always been dominating and control-freak, but in a nice way, until Amey happened.

Be it in his interaction with Kamal Joshi and then-daughter of the mentor, Sai - now his wife. He called the shots after rescuing her. There was no ill intention or manipulation-- but why was he the only one who had access to her in the safe house, not even her father? Why was he the only one she was supposed to call in case of danger (okay, Kamal joshi was said to be indisposed)? We found his college visit (with jagtap music score) amusing -- he did disguise as a milkman to meet her with the food, barely hours after he turned down Usha Maushi's request to take food for her. But he went, because he felt "disconnected" from her after she accidentally dialled his number, whispered sweet nothings and hung up abruptly. He wanted that feeling of 'connection' to be re-established. Even in that meeting, he wanted her to acknowledge his efforts for her "tumhare paas wapas aaya"...

It was "he" who decided he will marry to 'save' her. Yes, we know she consented eventually but we also know that 18 year old orphan suddenly disowned by the so-called family had no other option but to trust him. He did not give her any other option to choose from the menu of 'zimmedari nibhaunga' except the usal-misal of 'umeed mat rakhna' marriage.. Usme bhi, he only said, "Tum umeed mat rakhna"... now we know he never said, "Main umeed nahi rakhunga" ...

More recently (and in perfect retaliation to each word he heard in that flirting sequence from her) --"Tumse shaadi kisne ki? Maine. Tumhe Jagtap ke changul se kisne bachaya? Maine (Man, that hug that she didn't give him that day has remained etched in his memory 🤣), Tumhe hifazat se yahan kaun laaya? Main."

He is demanding that acknowledgement that he has been always waiting to hear. The alta lagaya hai was a sudden wind sweeping over his face that was hot with rage. "Oh wait! She does think I am her husband... she did it for me?"

Ab, Godu, you just spoke a lot of rubbish in that moment when you fell prey to the manipulation, uska kya?

So well, we can now see the grey in him. His grey could not have just been the impulsive brahmachaar ka vaada. The fact that he made such a vaada needs to have a context in his internal value/emotional system. It is coming up now...And i would like to say it is very intriguing - whether you like him right now or not. He is the raw, real man who is jealous. Is is toxic? Not yet, but if he cannot find his grip to straighten his own mess without his need to hear Sai say something to assure him -- then it might take the toxic turn.

He is not done with the Amey issue yet, to begin with. It is not about Aniket. But it is the tape of what she told Amey that is playing in his head -- each word of it. "Kya tum meri zarooratein poori nahi karoge"... now Amey was fake, but there could be a potential someone else who might pass the eligibility criteria. He needs assurance that he is the only source of her happiness-- because he has genuinely tried to make her happy. How can she forget, he thinks? But, the happiness that an 19year old state topper wants is different from the happiness a 'wife' wants to feel.

The thought is driving him crazy. But instead of giving her the assurance that he should give, he is it from her. But we also know why-- this guy cannot express -- double whammy. If he could, he wouldn't have needed to write the 'magical phone number' on his palm šŸ˜† that eventually vanished.

Am I liking him at the moment? As Virat, no. As a character, yes. I want to see how he eventually deals with it.. I guess he will end up getting sucked deeper into his mess to realise what has gone wrong and then try to swim out of the sludge he's himself landed in.

Edited by jankiraghav - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago
#47

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Wow! It has been such a demanding day here šŸ˜† i just got to read all the lovely insights. Since, almost everyone is on the same page, I would love to add that I agree with everyone who says that this whole "who-is-this-Virat" feeling is coming from the fact that he has not been able to get a grip on his feelings.

It was shallow how the whole "akele kahan rahegi" was just set aside but then on second thoughts, we have a scene coming up tomorrow -- and it might and it should throw some light.

I still think that the character is not going down the drain. We are only seeing the layers of his flaws that were hidden behind his armour suit as the lone warrior -cum-sacrificial lamb as the chaheeta beta of the family. I found his entire conduct over the alta shallow because he seems to be totally swallowed by his husband-ego and insecurity as an 'unwanted' husband. So, like any vulnerable person does, he latched on to this sudden feeling of importance that he felt when he heard that she applied the alta for him. I would have/still want him to explain the ease with which he said, "wo akeli kahan jayegi"... It is as indigestible to me as his challenge of jagtap se ladi toh meri family ko bhi jeeto -- to me, that will always remain an unpardonable comparison he made. So, if the script eventually tells us that his "wo akeli kahan rahegi" also needs to be recorded in the book of inexcusable slips, I am fine with that. Humans are allowed transgressions but what I want to see is then, how he proves himself worthy of this sudden urge to have all of this deal-wali wife so desperately. I need the connect between this newfound insecurity --that began from the time he heard her talk to Amey -- and his gradual falling in love. Without that connect, it seems shallow. Until the Amey scene happened, he was the "perfect image" of a man and husband we saw.

But that is where the beauty lies -- he is not perfect. We are actually seeing the raw emotions a man feels in such a state - why do we want the perfect image of a man. His behaviour is not coming from any malice but of utter indignation that his "authority" in the relationship has been challenged. Finally, there has come a reason for him to not want to be perfect. It is something he cannot fathom himself. As Ashwini said, "Aaj kal bohat gussa ho rahe ho, kya baat hai..." It is unlike him. Not just we as viewers, but even his close people can see it -- his mother wants to see it as him buckling under the pressure of the zimmedari; his family wants to see it as his frustration from being tied to an unworthy wife; his wife wants to see it as his frustration of having to suffer because of the deal-marriage and his yearning for Bhabhiji. But only he knows that it is none of the above is true. He is just overwhelmed because of a completely new feeling. He is unable to find control and it seems like it's only leaving him more and more amused at the way he's behaving himself.

Why I don't think it's a character degradation -- when things are rosy, we tend to overlook the flaws of the one we are enchanted by. When something goes wrong, we find even those actions that we first found "irresistible" as a flaw. He has always been dominating and control-freak, but in a nice way, until Amey happened.

Be it in his interaction with Kamal Joshi and then-daughter of the mentor, Sai - now his wife. He called the shots after rescuing her. There was no ill intention or manipulation-- but why was he the only one who had access to her in the safe house, not even her father? Why was he the only one she was supposed to call in case of danger (okay, Kamal joshi was said to be indisposed)? We found his college visit (with jagtap music score) amusing -- he did disguise as a milkman to meet her with the food, barely hours after he turned down Usha Maushi's request to take food for her. But he went, because he felt "disconnected" from her after she accidentally dialled his number, whispered sweet nothings and hung up abruptly. He wanted that feeling of 'connection' to be re-established. Even in that meeting, he wanted her to acknowledge his efforts for her "tumhare paas wapas aaya"...

It was "he" who decided he will marry to 'save' her. Yes, we know she consented eventually but we also know that 18 year old orphan suddenly disowned by the so-called family had no other option but to trust him. He did not give her any other option to choose from the menu of 'zimmedari nibhaunga' except the usal-misal of 'umeed mat rakhna' marriage.. Usme bhi, he only said, "Tum umeed mat rakhna"... now we know he never said, "Main umeed nahi rakhunga" ...

More recently (and in perfect retaliation to each word he heard in that flirting sequence from her) --"Tumse shaadi kisne ki? Maine. Tumhe Jagtap ke changul se kisne bachaya? Maine (Man, that hug that she didn't give him that day has remained etched in his memory 🤣), Tumhe hifazat se yahan kaun laaya? Main."

He is demanding that acknowledgement that he has been always waiting to hear. The alta lagaya hai was a sudden wind sweeping over his face that was hot with rage. "Oh wait! She does think I am her husband... she did it for me?"

Ab, Godu, you just spoke a lot of rubbish in that moment when you fell prey to the manipulation, uska kya?

So well, we can now see the grey in him. His grey could not have just been the impulsive brahmachaar ka vaada. The fact that he made such a vaada needs to have a context in his internal value/emotional system. It is coming up now...And i would like to say it is very intriguing - whether you like him right now or not. He is the raw, real man who is jealous. Is is toxic? Not yet, but if he cannot find his grip to straighten his own mess without his need to hear Sai say something to assure him -- then it might take the toxic turn.

He is not done with the Amey issue yet, to begin with. It is not about Aniket. But it is the tape of what she told Amey that is playing in his head -- each word of it. "Kya tum meri zarooratein poori nahi karoge"... now Amey was fake, but there could be a potential someone else who might pass the eligibility criteria. He needs assurance that he is the only source of her happiness-- because he has genuinely tried to make her happy. How can she forget, he thinks? But, the happiness that an 19year old state topper wants is different from the happiness a 'wife' wants to feel.

The thought is driving him crazy. But instead of giving her the assurance that he should give, he is it from her. But we also know why-- this guy cannot express -- double whammy. If he could, he wouldn't have needed to write the 'magical phone number' on his palm šŸ˜† that eventually vanished.

Am I liking him at the moment? As Virat, no. As a character, yes. I want to see how he eventually deals with it.. I guess he will end up getting sucked deeper into his mess to realise what has gone wrong and then try to swim out of the sludge he's himself landed in.


I really rack my brain at times to find a logical way to explain Virat and i agree with what you have written. I dont think he ever had a problem with Amey or Aniket, it was what was said in both the instances.

He wants to know his place in her life, wants know what he means for her. He was very happy and content when he heard her talking to her Abba about him. He was not looking for love but for acceptance.

That one line during the Amey scenario has hurt him the most, "I never said I will do as you want" but even then it was not the line but it was the way it was said. Since then I feel he has gone a little high on emotions and its coming out in anger.

Abhi toh affection aur attention pe ye haal hain, the day the man realises he is in Love (the real kind) dont know what he will do.

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Posted: 4 years ago
#48

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Wow! It has been such a demanding day here šŸ˜† i just got to read all the lovely insights. Since, almost everyone is on the same page, I would love to add that I agree with everyone who says that this whole "who-is-this-Virat" feeling is coming from the fact that he has not been able to get a grip on his feelings.

It was shallow how the whole "akele kahan rahegi" was just set aside but then on second thoughts, we have a scene coming up tomorrow -- and it might and it should throw some light.

I still think that the character is not going down the drain. We are only seeing the layers of his flaws that were hidden behind his armour suit as the lone warrior -cum-sacrificial lamb as the chaheeta beta of the family. I found his entire conduct over the alta shallow because he seems to be totally swallowed by his husband-ego and insecurity as an 'unwanted' husband. So, like any vulnerable person does, he latched on to this sudden feeling of importance that he felt when he heard that she applied the alta for him. I would have/still want him to explain the ease with which he said, "wo akeli kahan jayegi"... It is as indigestible to me as his challenge of jagtap se ladi toh meri family ko bhi jeeto -- to me, that will always remain an unpardonable comparison he made. So, if the script eventually tells us that his "wo akeli kahan rahegi" also needs to be recorded in the book of inexcusable slips, I am fine with that. Humans are allowed transgressions but what I want to see is then, how he proves himself worthy of this sudden urge to have all of this deal-wali wife so desperately. I need the connect between this newfound insecurity --that began from the time he heard her talk to Amey -- and his gradual falling in love. Without that connect, it seems shallow. Until the Amey scene happened, he was the "perfect image" of a man and husband we saw.

But that is where the beauty lies -- he is not perfect. We are actually seeing the raw emotions a man feels in such a state - why do we want the perfect image of a man. His behaviour is not coming from any malice but of utter indignation that his "authority" in the relationship has been challenged. Finally, there has come a reason for him to not want to be perfect. It is something he cannot fathom himself. As Ashwini said, "Aaj kal bohat gussa ho rahe ho, kya baat hai..." It is unlike him. Not just we as viewers, but even his close people can see it -- his mother wants to see it as him buckling under the pressure of the zimmedari; his family wants to see it as his frustration from being tied to an unworthy wife; his wife wants to see it as his frustration of having to suffer because of the deal-marriage and his yearning for Bhabhiji. But only he knows that it is none of the above is true. He is just overwhelmed because of a completely new feeling. He is unable to find control and it seems like it's only leaving him more and more amused at the way he's behaving himself.

Why I don't think it's a character degradation -- when things are rosy, we tend to overlook the flaws of the one we are enchanted by. When something goes wrong, we find even those actions that we first found "irresistible" as a flaw. He has always been dominating and control-freak, but in a nice way, until Amey happened.

Be it in his interaction with Kamal Joshi and then-daughter of the mentor, Sai - now his wife. He called the shots after rescuing her. There was no ill intention or manipulation-- but why was he the only one who had access to her in the safe house, not even her father? Why was he the only one she was supposed to call in case of danger (okay, Kamal joshi was said to be indisposed)? We found his college visit (with jagtap music score) amusing -- he did disguise as a milkman to meet her with the food, barely hours after he turned down Usha Maushi's request to take food for her. But he went, because he felt "disconnected" from her after she accidentally dialled his number, whispered sweet nothings and hung up abruptly. He wanted that feeling of 'connection' to be re-established. Even in that meeting, he wanted her to acknowledge his efforts for her "tumhare paas wapas aaya"...

It was "he" who decided he will marry to 'save' her. Yes, we know she consented eventually but we also know that 18 year old orphan suddenly disowned by the so-called family had no other option but to trust him. He did not give her any other option to choose from the menu of 'zimmedari nibhaunga' except the usal-misal of 'umeed mat rakhna' marriage.. Usme bhi, he only said, "Tum umeed mat rakhna"... now we know he never said, "Main umeed nahi rakhunga" ...

More recently (and in perfect retaliation to each word he heard in that flirting sequence from her) --"Tumse shaadi kisne ki? Maine. Tumhe Jagtap ke changul se kisne bachaya? Maine (Man, that hug that she didn't give him that day has remained etched in his memory 🤣), Tumhe hifazat se yahan kaun laaya? Main."

He is demanding that acknowledgement that he has been always waiting to hear. The alta lagaya hai was a sudden wind sweeping over his face that was hot with rage. "Oh wait! She does think I am her husband... she did it for me?"

Ab, Godu, you just spoke a lot of rubbish in that moment when you fell prey to the manipulation, uska kya?

So well, we can now see the grey in him. His grey could not have just been the impulsive brahmachaar ka vaada. The fact that he made such a vaada needs to have a context in his internal value/emotional system. It is coming up now...And i would like to say it is very intriguing - whether you like him right now or not. He is the raw, real man who is jealous. Is is toxic? Not yet, but if he cannot find his grip to straighten his own mess without his need to hear Sai say something to assure him -- then it might take the toxic turn.

He is not done with the Amey issue yet, to begin with. It is not about Aniket. But it is the tape of what she told Amey that is playing in his head -- each word of it. "Kya tum meri zarooratein poori nahi karoge"... now Amey was fake, but there could be a potential someone else who might pass the eligibility criteria. He needs assurance that he is the only source of her happiness-- because he has genuinely tried to make her happy. How can she forget, he thinks? But, the happiness that an 19year old state topper wants is different from the happiness a 'wife' wants to feel.

The thought is driving him crazy. But instead of giving her the assurance that he should give, he is it from her. But we also know why-- this guy cannot express -- double whammy. If he could, he wouldn't have needed to write the 'magical phone number' on his palm šŸ˜† that eventually vanished.

Am I liking him at the moment? As Virat, no. As a character, yes. I want to see how he eventually deals with it.. I guess he will end up getting sucked deeper into his mess to realise what has gone wrong and then try to swim out of the sludge he's himself landed in.

Wah - yes, so very true. We have always seen him as someone controlling, when he did his looks, he knew Sai "chup ho jayegi" in the beginning. When used to say "Sai", she would get quiet. These were the times when they weren't fighting but he always showed his authority in one way or another and received some satisfaction when the family members said "only you can control her, only she listen to you". He took pride when usha maushi said "daamd ji nahi hote toh tumhara kya hota sai" "dammad ji ab aap hi use samjha sakte hain" and then this sudden change where even Sai knows shes changed. Suddenly, she doesnt "listen" and also has started to mix in w the world, with other men. He was always controlling but the thought of losing his grip, is driving him nuts. I'd be curious to see how he comes to this realization (hoping her does). I dont know if all men are like this but from what I have seen from friends to uncles and boss, etc, the thought of losing control, of not being in power position or authority, drives them nuts. It's how they deal and recognize it that makes a diff. Some people never change yet some take corrective actions on improvement.

Also one thing that bothers me is him always saying "chup ho ti ho toh aur achi lagti ho" ...idk what that means but his "tum auro ki tarah shant aur sabhiya kyun nahi ho sakti" and this "chup ho ti ho" is like okay so you dont like her talking and responding back to you..which means he doesn't like the questions she puts on him and doesn't like the fact that doing so she questions his authority (whatever he thinks is in his mind) and with that there's no control on his side over her either ... so Sai baat bhi kare, lekin usse (virat) ko joh pasand ho ..wahi kare? wah beta .. lol

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Posted: 4 years ago
#49

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Good morning lovelies! šŸŒ„šŸŒ»šŸŒŗ

I am sure today the hangry people here will also have eaten the appetizers, and awaiting the main course tomorrow šŸ˜‚ so, do I need to say anything more?

Obviously, it was a calm episode -- setting the mood for a weekend episode of navra Baiko, hopefully. But, honestly, i am amazed at how easily the whole 'wo akeli kaise rahegi' has slipped by. All it took was Ashwini's, "Usne Virat ke liye lagaya... Jab Maine usse Kaha hi suhaag ko apshagun ho Sakta hai, wo pareshaan ho gayi .." for ACP Chavan to throw one dirty look at the family and walk away.

But what about the words you spoke, Chavan Saheb? They definitely cannot be taken back nor can one ignore the fact that you've set base for many more such reactions to follow.

Honestly, am not sure if the Precap is the exact scene but Sai is definitely not going to give him any pleasing answer to the question. And, he definitely is not in the mood to hear anything from her that reinforces the 'distance' between them.

"Aap mere itne nazdeek Kyun Hain?" was her question when she saw him trying to wake her up. The banter that followed had humour but it was acerbic for a man who's turning insecure at the drop of a hat. He did not get offended today because he was feeling the joy that she wore the Alta for him and the spell of her 'beauty' had not worn off completely either. He admired her beauty as she slept, oblivious to the fact that he was peering over her... But the inherent insecurity revealed itself when he couldn't help but think of the "competition". If the evening hadn't been 'rosy red' with her Alta feet, he would have probably been dropping her off at a hostel after another screaming match. The entire monologue about whether she did wear it only for him or to keep his Aai happy -- and then concluding that she wouldn't have remained silent if she hadn't was a feeling that overrode his inherent insecurity for the moment. If it weren't, he would have become a laal gubbara again for sure.

So, although the show tried to promote the superstition about suhaag Ka apshagun about Alta, I guess the actual reason for wearing it is nothing more than the 'entice with beauty'. Looked like it worked because Chavan Saheb couldn't help notice her feet even as she walked away -- he even used some of his forensic science expertise and spotted rashes on her feet, instantly turning into the paramedic/pharmacist and even recalling Aai ka nuskha for skin outbreak. šŸ˜…šŸ˜‚

The scene would have been better had Virat also had some value addition to his monologue about his own feeling for her-- it was all about being plain smitten and the awareness of Aniket being around... To me, his attraction would continue to lack depth unless he backs it with some real emotion he feels for her apart from his farz, zimmedari and the obvious sense of entitlement as a husband. That is not love. Of course, we know he cares deeply for her but getting aid for her rashes is something he would have done even for his 'best friend'. He's attempting to have Sai speak words or assurances to soothe his own fears without expressing his expectations and desires to her... But the scene was also very telling of how hard Sai is trying to display her detachment from him, just so that he doesn't notice she's vulnerable too. Because moments ago, while performing the rituals, she wouldn't have been turning to see him time and again. So, also, it was symbolic how the two performed a ritual in front of the family which included the maang bharna -- I wish they had played the anjaan rishta song for Sai and family 🤣 but the background score was a very muted version of the shubh mangal savdhaan of their marriage sequence.

In their private space, she goes back to 'ye Mera Ghar Nahi hai aur na hi Mera parivaar...' it isn't a taunt. It is how she's made to feel and she will continue feeling that way until he shows her through words and actions the "commitment" or "permanence" he seeks from the deal marriage. Her "naukron wale kaam" and "Kisi ke Ghar me rehna hai toh kaam toh Karna padega" was so apt. I am glad she mentioned this for I often think of it that way--- Virat thinks she's doing the household chores as a bahu but no, she's doing it out of her duty as a resident of the mansion. She can't consider herself a bahu until she is given the rights of a wife. So for him to aim to have a her be an 'acchi bahu' he first needs to make her a 'happy wife' not just a chirpy zimmedari. And of course, if she has to earn her breakfast by contributing to the kitchen duties every day, she would feel like a 'naukar'.

It is significant how much Sai has conveyed to Virat about her feelings and emotions over the last couple of conversations. But it's actually unfortunate that he's not been able to pick up the cues from it. When she told him about how she has changed, the college taunts, he was listening but from the filters of his jealousy and could not empathise with her... And today, he was listening from behind the sheen of the charm her beauty had cast on him -- and as usual, he ignored her comments about her feeling in context of the house.

Does he realise that his oscillation from one team to another -- which is perceived as his disappointment with his marriage by the opponents -- adds to the audacity of his family to ill treat his wife and mother. Ashwini should have told him that it's not just the chakrams viewing Sai with a big glass of hate but also closely watching how the man treats his woman. They know Virat can be manipulated and they use their skills at the right opportunity. Ashwini gave him a sound piece of advice -- speak to her with love and spashthta and she will do what you want. If you use the raub jhadna route, you'll only find resistance... It was one of the wisest things she said, which Virat needs to implement immediately but did he hear? He just seemed lost in the charm...

That brings me back to the issue of 'intimacy' -- conjugal rights. In real life, maximum number of court cases in marital discord are of restitution of conjugal rights, filed by one party to ask the court to order the guilty one to return to the marriage and attempt to save it. It doesn't mean the 'intercourse' but the 'outercourse' in a relationship. It comprises the entire commitment to a marriage -- interdependence, sharing and feeling the cosy warmth with one another. Why did just the mention that she's wearing the Alta for him bring him back to the team? Honestly, if that's the only reason why he calmed down, it's shallow. Because, the reason should have been complete conviction about Sai's honesty and goodness. But he needed 'saboot'. It was his assurance of being important -- the suhaag (well, Chavan SahebšŸ™„ ). In that one moment, he felt intimate with her -- closest, as he wants to be.. but what is love without trust?

Doesn't Sai want to feel the same way? Of course she does. It is very evident in those tender looks she's been giving him, in her prayer and her act of wearing the Alta in the first place -- oh, and she did not object to bring addressed as 'Sau. Sai Virat Chavan" by Ashwini during the interaction.. But she obviously doesn't want a heart break and the awareness of the crowd in the marriage is too strong to be ignored. The onus on building the intimacy rests a lot on Virat and ironically, he's the one who's seeking it on a platter, literally. Would Sai readily accept her leaning towards him, even if he were to ask in spashth words? I don't think she would jumpstart but it will at least clear her perspective about the intimacy they share.

Intimacy is confused with s-e-x. But it is a fact that you can do the physical act without any intimacy whatsoever and you can be intimate without any actual physical act too. Men crave pure intimacy as much as women although it is often projected as a women's need to have pure intimacy. Just the knowledge that he's on her mind and she appreciates his presence around her would be assuring enough for Virat to feel 'intimate'

He increasingly wants her to notice and use reaffirmation of affection in their day-to-day talks. But Sai is resisting the temptation because they first need to work on their emotional intimacy -- where they can be honest about what they feel for each other. It cannot happen overnight but it can definitely be started with one or two spashth sentences from the man -- let's see how he fares tomorrow šŸ˜… and if his ego remains enchanted enough to ride through the waves Sai will try to crash at him.

Oh, special mention to Ashwini for asking Godu to take the plate of dinner for Sai... But why is she still hungry? šŸ¤”šŸ¤”

And since there was a pitstop at the terrace before serving dinner to the Baiko, I would like to hear the response to 'Tum pyaar karte ho?' before delving into the entire encounter between bade Bhai ki wife and Sai ke Pati. Thankfully, Mrs Salunkhe is asking the right questions -- what am I even doing here? We all want to know what is your Five-year programme... Because the way things are going, one can't help wonder what you are really doing there. šŸ˜‚ I am sure she knows Bhavani has no love for her and there is really no one who loves her -- both her husband and his mother are missing. I hope she finds her answers and picks up pieces of her life to move on with grace. But isn't that too much to ask for of Mallika-e-Maturity?

****

It is always the "realisation" about something that really sets the ball rolling. Even between the closest people, distances exist. But they can beautifully live side by side if they can succeed in bridging that distance in silence and not with flashlights-- that's how love seeps in too, in body mind and soul.

Must you cross a bridge today? Grab your coffees ā˜•ā˜•ā˜•ā˜• and your teas šŸµšŸµšŸµšŸµ, arm your self with hugs šŸ¤—šŸ¤— and cross over like your heart has just set you free šŸ’–šŸ’–šŸ’–

Have a great day!

Lots of love ā¤ļø

J

Nice analysis janki


I just saw yesterday's episode , as I missed yesterday as I was myself busy playing alta alta with my family.


I don't believe she is 18 coz recently I got 2 know ninad said he had been married for 30 yrs , Ashwani said 27 yrs , earlier virat's age would be 27 acc to new revelation he definitely would be 30 or 29. Sai marksheet it tell she Nov 1996 born so she can't be of 18 yrs for sure.


Why virat asking vo kaha jayegi is wrong ? Acc to me he meant she don't have anyone 2 go , sai herself don't want to live with virat & chavans, usne kitni bar bola main chali chali jaungi , virat usse ajaad kar dena , she will be happy from chavan slavery . Why should virat leave with sai , what 4 tanne sune ke liye ? Aap virat jalebi maker kehte hai , to sai bhi to Tanna queen hain. Yes she Tanna queen uski jealousy, insecurity etc tanne ke form mein hi niklta hain, even sai don't say directly


If virat praise some of his female collegue or old college frnd come in , sai will all cool with it ?


My mother who never say word for any tv character today she also spoke up what was sai 's point in this alta kaand ? Matlab kya tha ye jab aakhir mein jaake usse alta lagana hi tha .


She don't want to apply alta - fair enough uski body , uski marzi .


She said she had allergy from alta - logical reason she can't harm herself for rituals šŸ‘šŸ¼


Yes C gang was definitely wrong in physical abuse as always coz no one deserve such treatment .


Vaise I want to ask makers which doc recommend that if u r allergic to something do d same thing by eating it's allergy medicine. My brother is allergic to mushroom still no doc suggested consume mushroom eating it's allergy medicine.


Yes I definitely agree virat did spoke many wrong dialogues like zabardasti lao , bina lagaye jane kyu diya etc.


But did virat knew sai was allergic , I guess now sadly usha tai & Ashwani dint cared to inform . Infact when Ashwani asked sun to le vo kya kehna chahti hain , he said sunnu ga .


When sai came virat don't raised his voice he was still talking in his normal voice .


I said sai is just catalyst to show virat his family reality , sai ke pass logical reason bhi tha alta na lagane still she dint dared to tell him why she refused & what they did to her . No virat is not an animal nor inhuman who would had beated her if she would had not applied alta , if I heard right he did ask kyu nhi lagaya alta in return in got d answer kisne kaha ki nhi lagaya , this was d answer he got . Do u really sai would had stayed silent if Virat would had shouted , she was only cool & silent coz she was prepared & knew virat ko jhoote pad chuke honge aur virat would be in bad mood .


As virat said sai likes to do things according her will, this incident proves that ,uski khud ki marzi thi , aur agar alta lagana hi tha why did refused earlier ?


Why C gang started getting successful in instigating virat coz Chavan family know sai don't really respect virat , as sai has humiliated virat infront of family , sai ka behaviour virat ki taraf uske mood pe depend karta hain . Do u really think Chavan family is blind that don't see all this & will not take advantage of it ? Virat ko iss shaadi se kya mila sawaal galat insaan be pucha tha , lekin ye sawaal ek din uski family zarur puchegi credit goes to how a wife treat her husband in front of family ? Chavan family virat ko bhi ussi mote chashme se dekhti jaise ki sai ko ,jhoote bhi virat 10 guna jyada maarti hain coz acc to them he is d reason of her being in d house . If virat would had been siding his family then why would he earn title like sai ka pati , joru ka ghulam etc , he always listen his father's naak kat gayi dialogue coz of his actions of supporting sai


Ye sai ka pati aur Chavan family ke shravan kumar mein virat ki khud ki identity is lost & nobody generally cares for him accept Ashwani .


If Virat is insecure of his position in Sai's life then sai too is insecure for her position in Virat's life chalo blame virat's zimmedari


If virat is jealous of aniket then sai is jealous of Pakhi , I doubt she appreciate his association with pakhi.


I feel sai definitely think that why virat don't accept her as wife & prefer pakhi that's why she said farak nhi parta dialogue to Ashwani as she saw pakhi feeding virat but dint know whole truth.


That's why I asked what was sai's pov for this marriage.


Aisa nhi hai sirf virat ke feeling badli hain , sai ki feelings bahut pehle hi badal chuki thi , deep down she had accepted virat as husband thou don't want to acknowledge it due to her reason fair enoughšŸ‘šŸ¼thats what Ashwani said she is running away from her own feelings . When today she saw virat bit close to her , she feared she might open her feelings.


Pyar ke liye ek saying hain pyar bhi earn karna parta hai , if u r not worth of that love then pyar will go away from u in minutes.


Pakhi ke saath yahi hua she dint trusted virat & now she can't do anything as that love is no more her , aur vo ye baat janti bhi hain that why she attack virat through family , so that they pressurize him as she knew he value his family.


Why should virat do all work & sai should receive virat 4 free ? Kyu khali virat ke mann me feelings hain.


Is it really fair that just appreciating his presence around her is enough for virat then from where she got to know virat don't appreciate her presence around him. She had seen him enjoying with her in admission day out . Even sai enjoys virat's undivided attention without acknowledging him husband but if virat demands her attention then he is wrong coz he has not acknowledge his feelings. Even sai get angry for at least for 1 or 2 days if virat don't support her in front of C gang.


Sai fear that her feelings for virat will be unanswered but if virat fear for rejection then why he is wrong ? Virat can't keep ego but sai has a right to keep it.


Virat is very well aware of family thinking coz if u remember after challenging her to win kaku mandali in college , in evening he only asked sai not involve in Shivani case coz he knew his family will not appreciate her , deep down he is sad that he can't give sai a happy family coz no matter what he does kaku mandali will not mend their ways .


Today virat did had monologue did she really applied alta for me , he did question himself , is she find him worthy ?


Regarding virat witnessing college to check aniket maybe other enjoyed but 4 me it was not funny , it was plain idiotic for me .


Thank u .

Edited by deepikagupta9 - 4 years ago
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Posted: 4 years ago
#50

Originally posted by: jane_austen

I'm not sure what I feel about the episode. The question - would Sai have applied the alta if she knew about Virat's obnoxious behaviour a few minutes back? - keeps nagging me. Doesn't she have the right to know this less-than-palatable side of Virat before deciding if he is a naariyal or a karela? 🤣 And on top of that Ashwini is busy brainwashing the girl that she is in love.

Regarding Virat, as you have written, he seems smitten and feels important(alta) but hasn't acknowledged to himself - his own rash behaviour nor (what should be) his better-than-before conviction in Sai's truthfulness. So the Sairat scenes felt sweet but without flavour.

@ bold -exactly!

If she is in love - let her feel it first... don't force her to think that... specially when your son is in love with own vahini .............. aswini is pushing sai to heartbreak

(if virat not reciprocating her feeling... that soon ...)


I liked aswini from starting - now she kinda turned in saas...

who expects bahu to do alta even if she has allergy for her namesake husband...

who appreciates/praises her son even if she knows he is wrong....


to love another woman (that too vahini) after marriage is NOT right in any way...

No-way he is a coconut... he is pendulum... a spineless male with no morals - nothing else...

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