Sushant Singh Rajput : A Star - Page 4

Originally posted by: Scarlet.ferro

I don't know what ankita is as a person so won't comment on it. But they did look so much in love and that's something I cannot -not-look-.

She chose to go and be with his family was endearing. Both , as a friend and as ex girlfriend.

In regards of his mental health , he said he was an insomniac which itself is onset of so many uncalled uneasiness. But he started sleeping well and was also meditating as per his insta post. He also stopped taking medicine because he was feeling better.. His only knows what went wrong in those hours where he felt like nothing was worth it.

I probably will always wonder

@TM

Beautiful post on SSR by you, dear! ❤️

I wish he was alive to see how much love his fans are showering on him 😭

Originally posted by: Scarlet.ferro

i totally understand you man.. I dont understand why it is so hurtful! Like a personal loss. His smiling face doesnt leave my mind and its been a month! I really dont know what has caused this tragedy so i dont want to give names on how he lost his life but either ways, it is gut wrenching.

If he indeed commit suicide, it is haunting what must have happened to break someone this much . What could have possibly undone him to the extent that he chose to kill all his dreams that he had woven for years that werent restricted to just acting. I am a psychiatrist by profession and i know what mental health can do to you but he used to come out as someone so mentally strong that i really believe he could have made through his depression if at all he was in depression. We dont know him personally so cant comment on his mind status then but those who knew him and claimed to have known about his severe depression, chose to leave him to die! Its criminal!

anyway I dont want to get into how and why he is not with us because it wont bring him back.

About Ankita, i know what you are talking about. Like i said, it could be because of his bollywood debut or his tv success or anything else but his courtship with ankita had a different effect on him. It was evident. And most importantly, he was proud of what he shared with her and that warmed my heart. Could this be avoided had she been in his life now? probably yes, probably not. He said they grew apart. A few months ago, he had stated about tying knot. So they grew apart in months time? Difficult to believe. Still.. cant deny either that its possible.

If we go by his treating doctor's statements, he wasnt happy with rhea. and regretted breaking up with ankita. but then he says to his dad he will get married next year, a day after ankita's engagement.. Its all so messed up! nothing adds up.

The doctor denied giving any such statement and I believe there wasn't any official confirmation of Ankita's engagement to her current boyfriend, therefore, I am a little hesitant to comment on that part.

But, I totally agree with you that its baffling those around him who knew very well of his depression left him alone when he should have been on a suicide watch constantly, especially after his last Instagram post which if one reads it now looks straight up like a suicide note. Contrary to what everyone thought initially, he wasn't even alone in his house. There were people living with him throughout the lockdown. Someone needed to make him feel wanted and loved...to tell him to hang on and it would be okay one day. You cant fight depression alone. You need a person who will keep reminding you to hold on. After the Bhatt fiasco, I honestly don't believe Rhea was that person. Running to the Bhatts for advice was the worst thing ever if one were to go by the Facebook post of some Bhatt associate. It really feels terrible that he felt so utterly alone despite being surrounded by people.

He should’ve chosen a different doctor too because it’s a doctor friends with bhatt guy. I feel horrible about this whole case. Rhea was just there for his money and the rest of his staff was there for his money too. Nobody cared about him. That’s why he felt alone. He made a post years ago probably that only his dog will miss him.

Originally posted by: Flame.

The doctor denied giving any such statement and I believe there wasn't any official confirmation of Ankita's engagement to her current boyfriend, therefore, I am a little hesitant to comment on that part.

But, I totally agree with you that its baffling those around him who knew very well of his depression left him alone when he should have been on a suicide watch constantly, especially after his last Instagram post which if one reads it now looks straight up like a suicide note. Contrary to what everyone thought initially, he wasn't even alone in his house. There were people living with him throughout the lockdown. Someone needed to make him feel wanted and loved...to tell him to hang on and it would be okay one day. You cant fight depression alone. You need a person who will keep reminding you to hold on. After the Bhatt fiasco, I honestly don't believe Rhea was that person. Running to the Bhatts for advice was the worst thing ever if one were to go by the Facebook post of some Bhatt associate. It really feels terrible that he felt so utterly alone despite being surrounded by people.

I can be completely wrong but the Internet said it was rhea's mother who wrote she 'discussed' Sushant with mahesh bhatt! And how Sushant was slipping away..How unsettling it is!! I am still keeping it uncertain whether or not he was depressed or whether or not he committed suicide.

I have stopped hoping to ever know what went inside that room on 14th June.

All I know is the world is a cruel place and he didn't deserve to die in so much pain.

What really went wrong we would never know.Only his close friends and family can give some insight but I doubt that will happen. As far as his relationships are concerned it's true that he was very much in love with Ankita and vice versa. They were both very young when they started dating and literally were together 24*7 while he was working on TV. Also if anybody has followed their relationship they would know how caring and protective Ankita was for Sushant. He definitely was a sensitive guy and Ankita was one person he could share his emotions with.But they were very different people. While sush has always been extremely hardworking and passionate, Ankita seemed more like 'go with the flow' kind of person. I genuinely think she is a good actor and could have done more in her career but she seemed content with what she had. I don't like when people say she sacrificed her career for Sush because it was her own decision to take a break Sushant in fact wanted her to work and not waste her talent. There is no way to know what happened between them only Ankita has that answer and I don't think she will ever want to open up on that.

Sush and Kriti were perfect match because they have many common interests but then again it's not enough for a relationship to work. I also am not sure if they actually were serious about their relationship because to me sometimes it seemed like they were just buddies hanging out with each other.

It was his alleged breakup with Kriti when I started noticing sudden change in his behavior. He looked miserable during Kedarnath and Sonchiriya promotions.In his interview with Faridoon post Kedarnath he looks like he would break down any minute.

Originally posted by: ninny

What really went wrong we would never know.Only his close friends and family can give some insight but I doubt that will happen. As far as his relationships are concerned it's true that he was very much in love with Ankita and vice versa. They were both very young when they started dating and literally were together 24*7 while he was working on TV. Also if anybody has followed their relationship they would know how caring and protective Ankita was for Sushant. He definitely was a sensitive guy and Ankita was one person he could share his emotions with.But they were very different people. While sush has always been extremely hardworking and passionate, Ankita seemed more like 'go with the flow' kind of person. I genuinely think she is a good actor and could have done more in her career but she seemed content with what she had. I don't like when people say she sacrificed her career for Sush because it was her own decision to take a break Sushant in fact wanted her to work and not waste her talent. There is no way to know what happened between them only Ankita has that answer and I don't think she will ever want to open up on that.

Sush and Kriti were perfect match because they have many common interests but then again it's not enough for a relationship to work. I also am not sure if they actually were serious about their relationship because to me sometimes it seemed like they were just buddies hanging out with each other.

It was his alleged breakup with Kriti when I started noticing sudden change in his behavior. He looked miserable during Kedarnath and Sonchiriya promotions.In his interview with Faridoon post Kedarnath he looks like he would break down any minute.

Actually, according to Abhishek Kapoor himself...Sushant seemed quite troubled and kept majorly to himself even while shooting for Kedarnath, shooting schedules of which extended from 2017 to 2018..the apparent dating period of him and Kriti as per the rumours...I noticed a periodic behavioral change in him even before that...which in some interviews was more noticeable than others, but if you followed him since his TV days you could tell that he seemed quite restless in several of his interviews through his bollywood career, which according to me was not the case when he was doing television.

God knows what he fought with inside within him...one thing though that was always quite obvious was that he did always needed an emotional support around him, to whom he can let go of all his worries and vulnerabilities to...as said by himself in one his interviews. Which makes me so sad that he didn't had any on that fateful day.

Originally posted by: my.2cents

Actually, according to Abhishek Kapoor himself...Sushant seemed quite troubled and kept majorly to himself even while shooting for Kedarnath, shooting schedules of which extended from 2017 to 2018..the apparent dating period of him and Kriti as per the rumours...I noticed a periodic behavioral change in him even before that...which in some interviews was more noticeable than others, but if you followed him since his TV days you could tell that he seemed quite restless in several of his interviews through his bollywood career, which according to me was not the case when he was doing television.

God knows what he fought with inside within him...one thing though that was always quite obvious was that he did always needed an emotional support around him, to whom he can let go of all his worries and vulnerabilities to...as said by himself in one his interviews. Which makes me so sad that he didn't had any on that fateful day.

Ya but that could be because of him being an introvert. He as a TV star wasn't used to giving such big interviews so one could easily notice his nervousness. Also although he was very intelligent and had so many ideas, he wasn't very articulate. He had this nervous energy while giving interviews and also used to repeat his sentences. I think he would have been much fun to have a conversation with if the cameras were not on him. His detective byomkesh bakshi behind the scenes director wrote a nice blog for him where she mentioned how he was conscious when he was in front of camera.

Here it's a nice read:

https://medium.com/@analogues/hold-for-still-6eec2eb9526b

Originally posted by: ninny

Ya but that could be because of him being an introvert. He as a TV star wasn't used to giving such big interviews so one could easily notice his nervousness. Also although he was very intelligent and had so many ideas, he wasn't very articulate. He had this nervous energy while giving interviews and also used to repeat his sentences. I think he would have been much fun to have a conversation with if the cameras were not on him. His detective byomkesh bakshi behind the scenes director wrote a nice blog for him where she mentioned how he was conscious when he was in front of camera.

Here it's a nice read:

https://medium.com/@analogues/hold-for-still-6eec2eb9526b

Yeah that's exactly why...agree on him not being very articulate even though he was probably smarter than many of his contemporaries and costars he used to give interviews along side with, also having that nervous energy, but as I said that peeked occasionally through his interviews...like in some interviews he seems to be so calm and collective like during SDR promotions but that again maybe cause he was still not that big of a bollywood star and was just starting off, then he seems absolutely ecstatic during byomkesh bakhsi's promotions full of excitement, like happy excited not nervous excited...and then I saw this interview of him during release of Dhoni and also read a comment under which was written 3-4 years back that he seemed so restless..so yeah that restlessness could be glimpsed every now and then in some of his interviews especially in the latter years, it seem to have gotten worse...but that could be due to many reasons.

Thank you for the link, I'll definitely give it a read!

Sushant did have a major personality change after Raabta did not work is something I that I noticed from mid 2018s. I have seen his interviews when he was doing..seen when he moved to films and also followed him when he suddenly just started talking about things..expressing it in a way that people found difficult to understood. His interviews screamed anxiety in the last 2 and half years.

Ankita and Sushant have been dating from their early/mid twenties. They saw their fame..growth as an actor together. They did have a very lovely relationship. Infact SUshant looked quite in love with her till he was with her. There was thing that I used to notice was he never left her hands in any public appearance. Infact I could relate it to their onscreen scenes where Manav will always hold her hands.. where they would go after getting married the second time. It was endearing to see them like that. And there was not much PDA that you would get to see. He just never let her hand go. This till his last appearance with her. He has said in many interviews that his success means nothing to him if he does not have Ankita to share it with.Both of their instas/twitters were completely loaded with each others pics.

I dont know about the growing apart part. But I do know that the hearts do not grow apart within a month.. One month you quote "forever and ever" and in another two months you talk about growing apart. This is something that I never understood..and probably wont understand ever.

About Ankita being snobby/arrogant , well among the two of them I have always been a fan of SUshant more than Ankita. But she was not what she was always portrayed by the media. SHe was just I would say had a big mouth , not filtering what she should say. It all started coming out when during jhalak elimination she kind of said that "I wish mera Sushant aaye aur sabki band baja de " which sounded very rude at that point of time. She had issues controlling her emotions. But w.r.t Sushant she has been very vert loving and possessive throughout. Infact I remember she would always carry and aura of pride once Sushant got in BW. Even before that every milestone he achieved she would be the first one to scream like crazy. Infact in one his last appearance with her, he performed for ZEE dedicating the performance to ZEE , shiamak davar and SRK , the three milestones in his life. You could see how happy and proud she looks like over there. JUst like a mother is when her child does well . Infact Kriti turns back and held her hand in comforting way in that one.

Sushant after the breakup was prepping for Raabta and also basking in the glory of DHoni. SUshant in his mind was sure Raabta was a hit. Infact it was his dream to work with Dinesh. In one of his first interviews after his debut he mentioned wanting to work with Dinesh. He had worked a lot for the movie and throughout the year he continued promoting it. One movie where I thought he gave in to the pressures of Bollywood where the promotions says more than you work. He was happy yes.. because he saw the greatest success in his lifetime and he was enjoying the attention he was getting for Raabta.Also had signed up movies with Homi and Irffan which eventually got shelved. Drive was also signed then which again eventually tirned out to be the biggest disaster of his filmy career followed by Raabta. He was very excited about landing up these films.. I did also see and arrogant streak in him which I never came across throughout his career..He suddenly started getting so angry and so self pompous. Raabta turned out to be of Dinesh's worst movies. For someone who has seen all his movies in theaters, I found Raabta's trailer so underwhelming that I did not even go on to finish the trailer. It was this failure that changed him and also his filmy friends. I remember just after the failure of Raabta Kriti's Bareily Ki Barfi came out and was a huge success.. I saw a change in Kriti from them . WHen the first poster of Luka Chipi came out Sushant also wished the duo a lot of luck and was royally ignored by both Kriti and Kartik. I felt bad for him. And from here on I saw him getting too much invested in physics (also because Chanda Mama was in line), science, guitar and his proteam. He would travel..interact with friends read books quote them and just that. But yes he had begun to lose a part of him. Him being a skirt chaser and someone who loves to have one nights with ladies with songs of his serial in the background...all this blinds had already started in the beginning of 2018.. That was when I leaped back to him. I had started feeling that he is being treated really bad now.

The me too allegations were the final nail in the coffin for him. And just after that or during that time there were articles on how Kriti and he broke up because Kriti is a one man woman and Sushant has roving eyes. That's when I really felt they never had a relationship that was too close emotionally. You dont do this to someone you love when he is such a mess. You do it someone who was close to you but not bigger than your career. During Kedarnath promotions he felt so lost, so troubled..wanting to explain so much and could not explain a bit. Sara anyway was highlighted throughout. And since the mee too allegations were going on even the makers and director felt it deemed that Sara gets talked about more. And when you see that movie, its Sushant that you take back with you.

ABout him unfollowing Sara , I dont really know because it really felt weird and something definitely went ugly. Because even if Sushant kept removing posts, unfollowing people . He would definitelu follow the ones who he wanted to follow, including Ankita, his sister.. and ofcourse the fans. I do not have an idea what went wrong between them, but I am not of an idea that they were dating. I do remember how after Simba Sara kept ignoring her first hero , a better film and just hyped Ranveer all the time. Infact KWK's episode of hers and her father was in such a bad taste.

After Dil Bechara shooting was done.. I suppose his depression was diagnosed.

I have seen Sushant being a very jovial boy.. jumping around. I have seen him being very matured with his answers. I have seen him talking about a lot of other stuffs apart from books/stars/physics. I have seen him being shy/introvert and laconic but very comfortable about himself, very confident and very articulate.

In the last few years he most of his qualities and appeared so conscious about his presence, about what he is talking about , wanting to speak so much and failing to convert them into words. In fact his last few appearances even in the award shows looked so hollow. He looked completely disoriented. A person might think he is high on something, because of how his face looked like.

About the aforementioned information, I have always had that instincts that he was getting emotionally detached in the last few years especially from mid 2018. He was compassionate about his work, he was philanthropic , he was still very attached to his fans , but he was definitely going low on emotional attachments with loved ones. He gave those vibes. However when he died, I assumed I am being very wrong about him, but getting across this one I realized after all I was right. From the man who once said , I can make friends easily when I talk to them..the man who said when I am low I talk to my girlfriend ..she is my strength..he became a man who said I dont have friends, I dont have anyone to talk to .. He became a man about who , the very people who he was close to in his last days, say that he did not share anything with me. He would never share anything. Probably he had convinced himself that the other person wont understand him at all.

Some parts of his interviews:

"I just cannot do without her."

Though we all know how smitten Sushant is by Ankita, the actor is not very vocal about the same. While talking about his ladylove, Sushant said," I just cannot do without her. This is one of the reasons why I'm emotional, insecure and I want to be with her."

-------

"If someone is very insecure about people close to him and if he gets used to someone it is very difficult for him to be without the other person. Something very similar has happened to me when it comes to Ankita.

"I am emotionally very insecure about Ankita and she has become a habit for me. I cannot live without her. I believe that I am a very detached person. It is very difficult to live with me. I think even I cannot live with me.

"Under such circumstances, Ankita very happily lives with me. She understands me very well. I would be a fool to let her go away from me. I would never want her to go away from me ever," says emotionally charged Sushant.

This one probably is fro 2015 just during DBD promotions, if am not wrong. I actually had forgotten about this one.

Well , its been a month today and I still feel that his there prepping up for his next one, beating all the rumuous/blinds about him , just focusing on his work. His death made me realise, even if you are around you friends girlfriends, who are not able to provide you the emotional stability you want . Everything you love, you adore you own , be it your books, your knowledge, your dreams, your telescope, nothing ..nothing can give you the assurance that you are needed, needed for them to be. Yo know just like he said, he will not be able to live with himself , and probably there was no one who wanted to live with this Sushant or could not give him the assurance that he is wanted. I dont know about Kriti or the one who followed, but I for sure know that ANkita was emotionally dependent on him. And he was overwhelmed by her need to be with him.

I just saw a post on Ankita's insta after a month , just a diya and quote "CHILD OF GOD". She could not have posted anything other than this as a tribute, considering she is in a relationship now. What she feels shall just be hers forever, she need not tell it to the world.

She and Mahesh were the only ones who never bothered to limit their comments section, when everyone close to Sushant was just busy doing that. They were probably in too much grief to actually be bothered about what names they are being called out. I am sure she is trying to cope up with everything and move on and we all should, even though we as fans who have been with him since he started..find it extremely difficult, we have to. Hugs to everyone who is finding it difficult . I empathize you. I feel you.